I'm a Loser Baby
by ClassyClassic16
Summary: AU, Warning! G!peen, graphic incest/rape, graphic child abuse. Quinn Fabray is the new girl in school who Rachel Berry is attracted to instantly, but what secrets are being hidden? (I suck at summaries...)
1. White Blank Page

**Alright, Here is the edit. Hopefully it was better than what I had before... And that's about it. If you're interested, the writing and style evolves, and it gets much darker. Just a warning. But thanks to everyone who put up with this chapter so far and reviewed :) **

**Spelling/grammar are my mistakes and Warning for child abuse/sexual abuse**

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Rachel Berry had certainly had enough of high school. Everyday it was a new thing, or rather, an old thing that was recurring. Slushies, a different flavor everyday, and she tossed the old change of clothes into her locker. She reached into her locker and pulled out her schedule and textbooks. She had learned from last year that carrying her things with her in the morning would get them sticky and wrinkled.

Now that Santana was captain of the Cheerios, Rachel might as well have purchased a one way trip to Hell. The Latina loved making fun of her, and she must've set up a contest. Whoever could slushy Rachel Berry the most times in one day would get to sleep with Santana Lopez, legendary slut_. Some contest_, Rachel thought, grating her teeth. Santana had already probably slept with all the boys in their grade, now it must be time for round two.

Slinging the bag over her shoulder, Rachel slammed the locker shut to see a blonde girl opening the one right next to hers.

This girl looked so much different compared to the other girls at McKinley. For starters, she was wearing a black leather jacket and a stripped red and black shirt underneath with black leggings and Batman converse. Not unusual at all, except anyone who liked superheroes was bound to get beat up. She had snake bites on her bottom lip, and small spacers, and Rachel couldn't help but thinking she was attractive.

"Do you have a reason to be staring at me?" The blonde spoke, her voice soft and feminine which Rachel did not at all expect. She looked as though she was perpetually angry, and Rachel really didn't need another one of those people in her life right now.

"No, I apologize. You must be new here, I'm Rachel Berry." Rachel smiled and stuck out her hand at the blonde, who turned and looked at her, to reveal her hair cut at the part in a short style, close to the scalp. She was now curious to whom this girl was, and she was always polite.

"Quinn Fabray." The blonde eyes Rachel's hand and reluctant shakes it. "Yeah, I'm new. Nobody's gonna fuck with me if that's what you're thinking will happen." Quinn slammed her locker shut and slung the Batman backpack over one shoulder. "I know how to handle myself Berry."

Rachel nodded, surprised by Quinn's abruptness. She really hadn't met anyone in the school who was willing to actually address her by her given name. "I trust you with that entirely, I just assumed being new in high school was difficult and you might like a friend." She smiled softly and shrugged at Quinn, who looked her up and down with a look on her face that Rachel couldn't quite understand. The brunette shoved aside any premonitions that were haunting her, and wanted to try and become friendly with Quinn.

"You don't have friends either?" Quinn asked, taking in Rachel's sweater and skirt, the brown eyed girl looked as out of place as she does.

"Well, I wouldn't say that." Rachel frowned, making Quinn instantly feel bad about what she said. And Quinn fucking Fabray never felt bad about anything out in the real world. "I just don't have anyone my age that I'm particularly close to."

"So you want to hang out with me?" Quinn tried to understand why anyone would actually volunteer to hang out with her. The past few schools she had tried the pretty girl act, and all she got were a few knives in the back. Now she just wanted to give off the "don't you dare look at me" vibe, and she had still managed to attract someone.

"If that's alright with you," Rachel nearly jumped with happiness as Quinn nodded, running her fingers through her blonde hair. She looked flustered, and Rachel quickly toned down her happiness. It was Quinn's first day, she did need some space. "What's your first class?"

"I don't know, I haven't even looked at this thing." Quinn pulled a crumpled schedule out of her left jacket pocket and shoved it at the hyperactive chick. Rachel took it, and unfurled it; the paper was folded like a map.

"Oh yay! You have English homeroom, the same as me." Rachel took Quinn's hand and began pulling her down the hallway towards the English wing of the school. "And we have the same second period class."

"That's good, I guess." Quinn really didn't care for school that much. She already knew whatever they were going to teach. A half-decent memory and a plethora of books in the past few schools had given her so much. Granted, the memory really hadn't done anything but scar her in the past few years. "I hate math though, it's pointless. All you need in the real world is how to do your taxes."

"Well, maybe you might change your mind and want to do something with measurements." Rachel shrugged when Quinn looked at her curiously.

"Yeah, that's gonna happen real soon. I have a better chance of going outside and measuring my car tires than going into a job that needs that shit." Quinn shoved her hands in her pockets and looked at the tiles while she walked, Rachel beside her. She didn't really have to look up; anyone who would dare to bump into her would see what Quinn was really made of.

Making a quick left down one of the halls, Rachel opened her mouth to say something, but was met face first with a strawberry slushy and the hockey team's laughter.

"Nice work Rick," One of the big buffoons high-fived the ringleader and Quinn saw red. Yeah, ok, this girl seemed a little too happy for a Monday morning, and Quinn was guessing she had the ability to be super annoying, but why the hell did they have slushy her. Rachel probably never even said 2 words to the guy.

"Hey you bastard." Quinn stepped in front of Rachel with her hands buried in her pockets, feeling the body of the taser. Enough encounters at her previous schools had taught her that she really needed to carry one.

"Ooh, look at Blondie, defending Man Hands. What the hell can you do to me, you dumb dyke?" Rick turned around and laughed, making this the perfect time for Quinn to lunge in and attack. She pressed the jolts of electricity to his neck and smiled. His body shook for a while, the electric current stunning him, and then he dropped to the floor, stunned out of his mind.

"That's what I'll do to you, prick!" Quinn kicked him in the balls, hard, and smiled as he grabbed his crotch, his face twisted in pain. Quinn grabbed Rachel's wrist and led her down the hallway, looking for a bathroom. This school was way too big, much bigger than the last one she was at; some makeshift high school in Iowa that didn't even have a field.

Finally spotting one when she heard the bell ring, Quinn huffed and pushed Rachel into the bathroom, seeing the halls clear out almost instantly. She pulled open the door and saw two girls in cheerleading uniforms on the counter, putting on makeup.

"Oh, look at the new girl with RuPaul. Why don't you two go find somewhere else to make out," The one with black hair sneered at Quinn, and the blond beside her giggled. Quinn knew tasering them wouldn't be a good thing, seeing as she had already made one enemy, but she wanted to so badly.

"Why don't you do go pick a spot under the bleachers and have your fun there. I'll even send a guy your way and he'll fuck you real hard." Quinn grabbed both by their ponytails and dragged them towards the door. She kicked open the door and shoved the two cheerleaders into the hall. "Get lost!"

Quinn turned back to Rachel and grabbed some toilet paper from one of the stalls, handing it too her. "Who the hell were those bitches?"

"You have some serious guts. One was Santana Lopez, she's head of the cheerleaders, and you really don't mess with her." Rachel wiped her eyes clean and blinked, her eyes wet with tears and beet red from the ice in the slushy. "And I'm guessing the other one was Brittany Pierce. Those two are inseparable."

"Yeah, and I'm guessing they're some of the biggest sluts in the school. Cheerleaders usually are." Quinn snickered at the thought. "Like that dick that slushied you is probably a man-whore."

"You didn't have to do that, you know. You could get in so much trouble for having a taser." Rachel wiped the last of the slushy off her face with some toilet paper as Quinn rummaged through her bag. She looked at the red one her previously pastel yellow sweater and white top. "What am I going to do about my clothes?"

"Well, I wasn't going to stand there and watch a girl get picked on. I've had that shit happen to me enough; I don't want to see it at all." Quinn pulled out a Black Sabbath t-shirt and tossed it at Rachel. "Get changed, you'll be sticky and horrible for the rest of the day in that sweater."

"Are you sure?" Rachel was taken aback at how Quinn was so willing to give away a shirt to a stranger. She was mentally kicking herself for being so quick to judge the blonde.

"Yeah, I never wear it, and it's if I need a spare change of clothes. No one messes with the girl with the taser, trust me." Quinn watched as Rachel slowly took off the stained sweater and shirt, leaving her only in a black bra that popped against her tan skin. Quinn looked down, knowing better than to stare at Rachel's beauty. The world she had grown up in had taught her harshly that thinking that about another girl was horrible, but Quinn had long ago come to the conclusion that she was a horrible person. She was fine with staring, but the other girls typically weren't.

"Does this look ok?" Rachel looked at her with worry, the top clinging to her in all the right places. Quinn quickly looked at Rachel's chest as she surveyed her and nodded.

"It looks fine, you worry too much." Quinn shoved the stained clothes into her backpack, and tried not to make her staring known. She took out a black winter hat and put it on, rearranging her hair so it brushed against both shoulders.

"Why are you doing that?" Rachel shrank back at the look Quinn gave her, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to intrude."

Quinn shook her head at the look on Rachel's face and turned around. "Teachers typically don't like it when I walk into class with my hairdo. And they usually like me putting the hat back on after taking it off when I walk in the door." Quinn slung her bag over her shoulder and silenced Rachel as she opened her mouth to protest about her clothes. "I'm keeping your top and sweater in my bag because you have no room in yours, filled with so many friggin textbooks."

"Understood," Rachel looked at herself in the mirror, curious at how the new top fit her so well. "And we really should get to English class now."

"Why? It's about as purposeful as math." Quinn hunched her shoulders, and shrunk back as Rachel put a hand on her wrist. She pulled away harshly; no one touched her there, ever. Quinn looked down, away from Rachel's hurt and guilty stare, rearranging the beaded bracelets on her arm. She bit her lower lip gently, a nervous habit and waited for Rachel to say something.

"Because you have to pass high school if you want to get a job. And showing up to the class is the first step." Rachel smiled softly, secretly wishing that Quinn would put one arm around her shoulder and protect her. She knew better than to ask. Her heart was still slightly racing at Quinn's reaction to her touch and the look of heart-stopping fear on her face.

"Alright Berry, you win. Let's go to fucking English class." Quinn pulled open the door for Rachel and she saw the short one blush. She clearly wasn't used to being treated well, and that was something Quinn could definitely relate too.

"Thank you," Rachel murmured and headed down the hallway at a reasonable pace. Her flats made no sound as she hurried down the halls, Quinn's converse scuffing along the floor as she tried to hold Rachel back. "It's the last door on the left, Quinn, we're already late."

"Jesus Christ, you're tightly wound aren't you?" Quinn huffed, but they reached the class just as the announcements finished up. Stepping into the classroom, Quinn scanned the students looking at her, unsure of what to make of her. She saw the Latina bitch at the back of the classroom, smacking her gum and Quinn scowled. She never had good luck in her classes, and another school change clearly didn't make anything different.

"Mark your names off on the class list and take a seat." The bitch of a teacher stared down her horn-rimmed glasses at Quinn, and the blonde wanted to sneer at her. She snatched the clipboard from the old lady's bony hand and scrawled her name next to _Fabray, Quinn_ before handing it to Rachel. She watched Rachel neatly print her name, and shook her head, knowing this one was probably neat with everything she did.

Quinn sat at the window seat in the front and Rachel took place beside her. She pulled out a sketchbook and the English book they were required to read over the summer, but she had already read it a few years ago and she remembered everything that had happened in it. She rested her chin in her hands, her fingertips running over the small black balls that were on the end of the piercings; a birthday gift to herself for her 15th. She twiddled with the pencil in her hand and started sketching a monster in the book, as usual. She could feel Rachel looking over her shoulder at the drawing, but she didn't give a shit. The class was too fucking boring to not draw in it.

She rested her head on the desk now, closing her eyes. That stupid little voice in her head told her not to, but she ignored it. It was pissing her off now, just like the damn memories that refused to stay repressed.

-.-

"_Hello Father," Quinn greets Russell, who's standing in the hallway, leaning against the carved wooden railing. Today is Friday, and Quinn got to wear her favourite skirt and her favourite sparkly shirt to school because tomorrow is her ninth birthday. She is so happy that her friends are coming over tomorrow for cake and a movie. It's the first time she's ever had friends over, well, it's the first time she's ever had friends to invite over. _

"_Go to your room Quinn" Her father says gruffly, and Quinn now notices the booze stains on the front of his buttoned shirt. His blonde hair is streaked with gray, and she knows that this week must've been especially hard at the office if he forgot to upkeep the dye job. The smile from Quinn's face drops as she hears this. _

"_But Father, I didn't do anything wrong today." Quinn pleaded, her already high-pitched childish voice raising another octave. She had gotten all her words right on her spelling test, and she had the test with her to prove it. She hadn't even flinched when the soccer ball hit her private area, even though she really wanted to fall to the ground in searing pain. _

"_Go to your room Quinn!" Her Father repeated, his voice even calmer, and Quinn knew that she would get hurt badly this time, for questioning him, and for acting as though she hadn't been bad. Everyday of her life she had been bad and this punishment that he was giving her was only being instilled now because she was old enough. That's all he said to her, that she was old enough. Before she turned 8, it was only a belting every night in her room and she had the scars on her back to prove that. It was because she wasn't like the other girls, that she was always bad. _

_Quinn pushes open the large oak door, and pulls her skirt tighter around her legs. The room is covered with awards for spelling bees and gymnastics competitions. Pictures of her in the gymnastics costumes are on the walls, and she remembered wearing them for the first time, how Mother had helped her hide it really well. _

_She sits on her bed, and tosses her backpack on the side. She wants to grab her Cinderella doll and curl into a ball, because if she's really small, Father can't hurt her as much. She looks at her bag, it has Cinderella on it. She had begged her Father to let her buy it for school. _

_Quinn head whips up at the door slam and she bites her lower lip hard. She closes her eyes as Russell crosses her room and shoves her onto the bed so hard that she thinks he bruised her shoulder. She wants to cry when he flips her over and yells at her to pull down her underpants. _

_With shaking hands, she does. She doesn't have a choice, otherwise he'll just rip them off her and the last time he did that, she had cuts all over her thighs that refused to heal. He pulls her skirt off her, the elastic snapping and Quinn wants to protest, that was her favourite skirt, it was such a pretty shade of blue and it had pockets. _

_Lying on the bed face down, her bare bottom exposed, Quinn bites hard on her lower lip as she hears him unzip his pants and the rustling of the belt and fabric as he tugs them off. _

"_Please Father; I was a good girl today. I didn't do anything bad, I didn't react, and I listened to your suggestions." Quinn begs, and holds in a scream as he shoves his hardened member into her. She does scream really, her lips are hammered shut but she can feel the high-pitched scream start in her throat and make its way into her mouth, giving her a headache from holding it in. _

_His hard member penetrates her, and she feels old wounds reopen, wishing that they'll start bleeding soon. Father never keeps hurting her when she bleeds, he runs away because he actually gets afraid. The entire ordeal lasts about 5 minutes, Quinn checks on her watch, but it feels like eternities. She scrunches her eyes shut and screams as loud as she can with her mouth closed as he pushes in as much as possible before pulling out. She lets out a small sniffle as he pulls out, and pulls his pants back on. She instantly feels the hand cross her tailbone and she moans in agony. _

"_Shut up!" Russell gets his ear so close to hers and Quinn holds back tears. "You'll never be a good girl. Do you know what you are? You're a freak. You aren't my son, medicine has proven that, but you sure as hell aren't my daughter." He hisses into her ear, his hot breath making Quinn uncomfortable and she wants to wipe away the spit that's lining her earlobe. She doesn't move as he buckles his belt._

"_We're moving in a month. To Colorado. Your mother told me to tell you." Russell grunts in Quinn's direction and she turns onto her side, knowing that her father always wants to see her when she speaks to him. _

"_Thank you for that information Father." Quinn chokes on tears as he stalks out of her room and slams the door. She shakes her head, blonde hair strewn around the bedspread. This was the 7__th__ move in 5 years. _

_She feels the burning tears cross her cheeks and she doesn't bother to hold anything in anymore. It hurts so much, but it obviously didn't start bleeding and Quinn wishes it had. She's afraid to roll onto her back for fear that it would hurt so much that she wouldn't be able to move, like the first few times. _

_She finally stands up and walks with pain to get her skirt, catching a glimpse of herself in the full length mirror. Quinn picks up a pair of her underwear and pulls them on, looking at herself in the mirror, her penis looking out of place on her body. She tucks it away like her mother taught her to do for gymnastics and watches as the bulge in the butterfly underwear disappears. _

_Quinn makes her way down the stairs, with a lot of hard work. It hurts when her backside brushes against anything and the movement makes it hurt worse. She wants to cry with every step, but she can hear her parents talking in the kitchen and she knows that they don't want her downstairs yet. She silently sits on the stairs, tears welling in her eyes on contact with the carpet. It hurts so much, and Quinn puts her head in her hands, trying to make the tears disappear, just like bad guys did in movies. The tears were like the bad guys, because if she got caught with them, she'd be punished, just like the good guys in the movies. _

_She had to be a good guy, right? Isn't she supposed to be the good guy in her life? She knows she is, and she just had to be the hidden good guy. Like Cinderella is the hidden princess, that's what she is too. _

"_I'm Cinderella," Quinn whispers to no one but herself and she smiles. It's small and sad, but it's a smile. If she's Cinderella, that means she be good one day, even though she knows Cinderella is always good. That has to mean that she's really good always too, like the Disney Princess. No matter what Father says, she has to be secretly good. _

_A bigger smile comes onto her face when she realizes this. "I'm Cinderella, and Father is the wicked Stepmother." _

-.-

"Quinn, are you awake" Rachel whispered, gently nudging Quinn's arm and the blonde jumps, looking at her with flashes of fear on her face before the expression settling into one of annoyance.

"Of course I'm awake, Berry. See, walking and talking, all alert and shit." Quinn tossed her things into the bag and swung it over her shoulder, walking out of the classroom as fast as possible, with Rachel right on her heels.

"Well, I have notes that we need for a test this Friday, if you need to review them. Quinn, I don't want you to fail this course, and falling asleep on the first day isn't going to make the teacher like you any more." Rachel felt herself chastising Quinn, and she really wanted to stop, but the rational part of her mind was taking over. She could see the blonde's shoulders beginning to tense with each word that she spoke and right outside the math class she snapped.

"Look, Berry, I don't care if that bitch doesn't like me. No one likes me, ever. For you to actually talk to me for more than five minutes is the exception, not the rule. People generally don't want to talk to me and I can pass these fucking courses." Quinn made herself as tall as possible, which was easy considering she already had at least 6 inches on the midget. "So stop telling me that I'll fail ok? Just shut up with that. If I need someone to tell me how horrible I am, I'll talk to my parents. I don't care if you want a friend, I'll talk to you, but stop getting on my nerves." Quinn stormed into the math class and left Rachel slack jawed in the hallway. She slumped into the same seat as English and she dumped her bag on the floor, and covered her face with her hands, thinking about how heartless she just was.

Rachel finally slipped into class, sitting on the opposite end from the classroom. Quinn sighs and looks out the window at her cushy spot in the class that Satan himself created. She picks up her bag, and walks across the class, pulling Rachel up by the wrists and dragging her back to the window seat. She sits Rachel down in the seat beside her and slams back on the uncomfortable chair, unsure how to word an apology for what she just said.

"I'm sorry; I didn't know how much I was annoying you." Rachel whispered, leaning down in her seat as Quinn looked up to see Santana and Brittany entering the class, laughing.

"You aren't annoying me. You wouldn't be wearing my shirt if you were." Quinn whispered, smiling as Rachel laughs a little, her eyes wet with tears that still had yet to fall. Quinn felt that lump settle in her stomach as she took Rachel's hand, holding it tightly while she looked at the brunette. "I don't know how to apologize, I wasn't really taught how too. So if I could say I'm sorry properly, I would. You know that, right Berry?"

Rachel wiped the tears that were coming down her cheeks with her free hand. "Yeah, I understand." She smiled at Quinn softly, and the blonde nodded, trying to smile but it didn't work out well. Quinn dropped her hand and hugged herself, looking extremely uncomfortable in the chair. "After this we have lunch."

"That's good; you can see the type of weirdo I am when I'm not cooped up in a hellhole." Quinn refused to make eye contact. She had spent forever trying to undo her Father's conditioning after one "feel good about yourself" assembly in a school back in Kansas, and now that she thought about it, they were a bunch of hippies. But they did convince her that she wasn't shit, so the hippies were ok people. Still, after all her efforts, some things wouldn't go away. Her Father always told her not to make eye contact after she had been bad to someone, and she would count what she just did to Rachel as downright evil.

"You aren't a weirdo, I can guarantee it." Rachel smiled and the bell rang, with more than half the class still missing. She took out the math textbooks and rolled her eyes when Quinn brought out a sketchbook and a notebook of graph paper, biting her tongue and determined not to undermine the blonde any more.

"Is this it?" Quinn hissed to Rachel as the teacher came in and shut the door, greeting the class in a much nicer way then the bitch from homeroom.

"It's an Honors math class, I expected less people actually." Rachel whispered back and Quinn shook her head, twirling the pencil between her fingers, wishing for some gum. There was no way she could sleep in this class, and that was probably a good thing.


	2. King and Lionheart

**Wow, I wrote a lot.. Anyways, thanks so much for all the amazing support for this story! Seriously, you guys rock. ****Still a little stunned about how many people liked the first chapter. **So I hope you like this chapter too. Does it live up to the first one?  


**So, if anyone's like me and has soundtracks for stories, I wrote the flashback to Coldplay, mostly to The Scientist, Clocks and Fix You. The rest of the story was Rise Against and Bush  
**

**All mistakes are mine, sorry about the spelling. Enjoy!  
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Quinn sat in a daze through math class, at some point creating a slingshot with one of her bracelets and a few pencils that annoyed Rachel so much. Quinn could see the look on Rachel's face every time the pencil bounced against her arm, and she really wanted to burst out laughing when she managed to hit the midget as she answered a question.

Finally giving up after she realized the midget had gotten all of her pencils, Quinn leaned on the desk and looked out the window, listening as the teacher made his way around the classroom expecting the students to answer questions. She must've heard one dumb broad answer one question wrong so many times, she wanted to go back and just toss her out of the class.

She yawned and stretched, ignoring the teacher talking to Rachel just one foot away from her, and she grabbed a pen out of her bag and started drawing random shit into her sketchbook. She turned too see the midget working intently on one of those stupid problems and she smiled. Rachel looked so cute when she was so focused.

"Ms Fabray, do you have the questions done from the beginning of the period?" The teacher looked down at Quinn and shook her out of the slight daydream she had been in. She grimaced and shoved a crumpled sheet of paper out towards him. She could feel his disapproval as he looked over the answer and as she smirked as he handed it back with a perfect score.

"Why didn't you say you were so good with numbers?" Rachel looked at her with a slight shock, and Quinn smirked.

"Jesus Berry, we just met. I didn't know you wanted my entire life story." Quinn laughed, seeing Rachel's face flush with embarrassment. "Relax, it's a joke. I'm good with numbers, straight numbers. Believe me, when we start getting into complicated algebra, my mark will plummet." Quinn shoved the paper into her bag and waited for the bell to ring. Another 5 minutes in this class with that dumb blonde talking about her fucking cat would make Quinn go insane.

"Alright, fair enough. You don't know much about me, and I don't know much about you. Apart from the fact that you swear a lot and seem to love the color black." Rachel saw Quinn dumping everything on the desk into her bag and look up at her. "What?"

"Can you give me my pencils back?" Quinn smiled as Rachel rolled her eyes and pressed them into her open palm.

"Are you going to do that in every class? Because unlike you, I need to focus on my studies if I want to do well, and having you pelt me with pencils is not a good way to keep concentration." Rachel huffed, placing her things neatly away into her bag while Quinn slung the Batman one over her shoulder.

"Alright, I'll leave you alone in this class, but I don't know about the others. Except for English, that woman's a bitch." Quinn smiled as Rachel let out a small giggle.

"You're definitions of others are very colourful." Rachel spoke just as the bell rang, and Quinn pulled her out of the seat, desperately wanting to get to lunch. She pulled the midget to the door, slamming Santana hard into the door frame as she walked through. The Latina scowled at her, and Quinn ignored it.

"Sorry bitch; didn't see you there." Quinn snickered and turned to Rachel, saying loud enough for the entire math class to hear. "Hey Berry, there aren't any STD's that can travel through clothes, right?"

Rachel covered her mouth to hold in a bubble of laughter as Quinn let go of her wrist and the two walked side by side through the crowded hall. "Quinn, you really do have a death wish. No one says that to Santana Lopez, ever."

"Well, I'm not your average person, am I?" Quinn smiled; feeling Rachel gently put a hand in on the crease of her elbow, her hands shoved in her pockets. This definitely didn't have any memories attached to it, and she was glad that the midget could actually touch her without her freaking out. She wanted to kick herself because she was so fucked up that she couldn't even be touch in certain places without flipping out.

"No, definitely not." Rachel smiled softly, her cheeks becoming hot as Quinn looked at her, a smile playing at her mouth. "And during lunch, I want to know why you have those piercings."

"Why, you don't like them?" Quinn raised an eyebrow, holding in a smile as the midget blushed. Damn, she even looked good when she was embarrassed.

"No, just curious. They seem to suit you well." Rachel whispered, feeling the heat radiate from her cheeks. For some strange reason, she wanted to reach out and just run her fingers over Quinn's jaw, as if to draw something more out of the blonde.

"Alright, but it's a really simple explanation." Quinn was glad she had shoved her lunch into her bag that morning, and she knew Rachel had hers in as well, she had seen the midget put in it in at their lockers. She took one hand out of the pocket and fixed her hair, brushing the lengthy side over one shoulder.

Turning down yet another hallway Quinn hadn't seen before, the two could easily see the star of the football team looking at Rachel with a slushie in his hand. She didn't even know if it was football, but this was America and she really hadn't seen any other teams yet. Quinn looked up at him, their eyes meeting, and she felt the sudden, strong urge to punch him as hard as she possibly could in his smug face. "Who the fuck his he?"

"That's my ex-boyfriend, Finn. We split last year, and he didn't take it well. Now he's about as ruthless as the rest of them." Rachel sighed, and Quinn felt her hand gripped the jacket tighter. This bastard was definitely going to pay if he didn't anything to Rachel, that's for damn sure.

The two parties were eventually going to meet in the hallway, and Quinn really couldn't handle seeing Rachel getting slushied again, the first time was bad enough. She stepped faster than the brunette, putting herself in front and Quinn felt her fingers tighten around the taser, ready to use it.

"Don't you dare pull that taser out again, you could get in serious trouble," Rachel whispered, and Quinn shrugged her off. If this bastard made the first move, she'd attack. She knew better than to be the instigator in a fight.

"Listen Berry, if he does anything, it's coming out. I don't care what you tell me." Quinn hissed back, finally approaching Finn Hudson. She still was trying to suppress the urge to start beating him up.

"You must be the bitch who tasered the hockey player this morning." Finn smirked at her, and Quinn really wanted to punch him. Like, she wanted to see this guy bleeding on the floor, he reminded her so much of her Father and she had no idea why. Maybe it was the air he gave off; smug, confident, doesn't give a shit.

"What's it to you, now get out of my way fuckface." Quinn shoved her way through the crowd of football players, and she felt Rachel gasp. Turning around quickly to see Rachel covered from the top of her head down in multi-coloured slushy, Quinn held nothing back. She let go of Rachel and gritted her teeth, looking at the prick laughing with his buddies with their backs to her. "Hey you jackass!"

"Ooh, you're going to fight me too. I can handle a taser." Finn laughed and one of his buddies thumped him on the back. Quinn grabbed his collar and pulled him down to eye level with her.

"You don't know how to treat a lady do you, you bastard?" Quinn could see him trying to keep a straight face. Quinn acted fast, her fist colliding with the bridge of his nose and she heard a satisfying crack. She shook her hand, which was stinging slightly and she saw him fall back a little, holding his nose. She lunged out with her other fist quickly and gave him a one-two punch to the eye and gut. Breathing heavily, she watched him fall onto the floor in agony, and she grinned. "And that was my top you got dirty, strike two. You really don't want to know what I do when you get a home run." Quinn kicked him in the balls hard, and watched as the football team stood there dumbfounded. "Dirty bastard."

Quinn grabbed Rachel, and pulled her out of the nearest doors, seeing the bleachers a few feet away from the exit. Surprisingly, no one was outside today, but that was just fine with Quinn. Well, ok there were a few kids at the end of the bleachers, but they didn't look like the type to fuck with her.

"Are you ok?" Quinn whispered, looking at Rachel, handing her a tissue to wipe her eyes with. Rachel sniffled a little, and smiled, accepting the tissue.

"I'm fine, I'm sorry your top is ruined." Rachel sniffled again, and looking up at Quinn, her eyes red and puffy and her cheeks tinted from the purple colouring. She ran the tissues over her hair, trying to keep it from frizzing.

"Don't sweat it, it's just a top. I'll buy another one. I just don't think I have another change of clothes." Quinn led her to the bleachers and the two sat down, Quinn wishing she had the sense to wear baggy jeans today, with the recent heat wave. She tugged off her jacket and tossed it onto her bag, letting Rachel see a few faint red lines on her arms. "See, I didn't use the taser."

"Yes, you just made him bleed profusely and probably broke his nose. Everyone in that hallway heard the crack." Rachel smiled softly as Quinn grinned, like a puppy. Rachel noticed the thin pink lines running the across Quinn's inner arms, and she knew better than to question them. She didn't want Quinn pulling away from her again; that was something she might cry over if she lost the only friend she'd made in years. "So tell me about your snake bites"

Quinn pulled out a small sandwich, and smiled, shaking her head slightly. "They were a birthday gift." She took a bite of the cold bread and the strawberry jam, and forced herself to swallow. "What are you eating?"

"It's a salad, with vegan dressing and a small croissant" Rachel looked up to see another confusing look on Quinn's face, one she couldn't quite decipher. It seemed like a cross between amusement and 'are you kidding me?'

"Alright princess, only the best for Rachel Berry." Quinn swallowed another horrific bite of the goddamn sandwich, and she watched as the midget's cheeks turned a new shade of crimson.

"Would you like to try some?" Rachel offered the container to Quinn, who looked at it as though it was something strange and foreign. She knew her cheeks were red; she had never been nicknamed princess before, not even by Finn. He wasn't big on nicknames.

"I'm good. If I finish this shit, I'll just buy a bag of chips or something." Quinn tried to eat the cold bread, but ended up tossing it behind the bleachers. "So explain to my how the hell that idiot blonde made it into Honours math."

"That was Brittany." Rachel put the remainder of her salad on the bleachers and started eating the bread, watching as Quinn began picking at it. "Santana usually helps her cheat, and math must have been the one that she got highest marks in. I really wonder how Brittany can hang out with Santana so much, they really are polar opposites."

"How?" Quinn took a bite of the salad, and it wasn't half bad. Much better than anything her parents could ever make, that's for damn sure. "Lemme guess, that Latina bitch is a genius?"

"I don't know about that, but when Brittany isn't being dominated by Santana, she's actually a very nice person. She isn't the brightest bulb though." Rachel looked across the field to see Kurt and Mercedes walking back to the school. They had been sitting behind her the entire time, and didn't bother to say anything, and they were the people she considered to be her closest friends.

"Well, I haven't encountered Brittany sans Santana, but she doesn't seem to have too much going on upstairs. Except that damn cat." Quinn looked to see Rachel looking at the two across the field and wiped her mouth clean of dressing. "Who are they? More people I shouldn't like?"

"No, its nothing like that." Rachel sighed, knowing the truth would come out sooner or later. "That's Kurt Hummel and Mercedes Jones. They're in Glee club with me, and I thought they were my closest friends, but they ignore me like the majority of this school." Rachel picked at the half eaten croissant, and Quinn noticed how her fingers looked scabbed and dry.

"Yeah, sorry about that. I might've given them reason not to come over." Quinn blushed, hating herself for it and looked down immediately.

"It's not you," Rachel shrugged, "They usually don't talk to me outside of glee. I guess you were right about me not having any friends. It's the truth really, not many people like me."

Quinn could've sworn she felt something snap inside her when she heard Rachel so sad and broken. She got up silently, leaving the salad on the bench and stepped over the bags, sitting as close to Rachel as possible. She didn't really know what she was dong until she felt the midget in her arms, and she hugged Rachel as tightly as possible. She breathed in the brunette's scent, and felt her smooth skin, knowing that this was just… right.

Rachel looked up at Quinn as the blonde stood, afraid that she was just going to walk away like everyone else. She felt Quinn sit beside her, feeling their thighs touching, and she felt Quinn hug her tightly. Honestly, she was shocked. She didn't think the blonde would eve be so forward, or that she would be the type to actually hug. She didn't move; she didn't know if she should, but she felt herself relax as Quinn held onto her longer.

Twice Quinn opened her mouth to say something comforting, or happy or funny or some other shit, and twice she shut it again because she really didn't want to make this awkward. She really didn't want to have to go back in that stupid school and wreck whatever the hell this was, so she just rested her head on Rachel's shoulder and kept her mouth shut.

Rachel felt her heart skip a beat when Quinn put her head on her shoulder, and the hat brushed against her cheek. She didn't know what to say and for the first time in her life, Rachel Berry was speechless. She still didn't want to move, she wished that the school day could just be over right this minute. "Thank you Quinn,"

"For what?" Quinn whispered back, afraid to break the moment. She didn't want another good thing to be lost because of her. "Friends hug each other right? I really don't have much experience with this sort of thing."

Rachel felt her stomach sink a little, and nodded. "Thanks for being here, with me." Of course Quinn saw her as just a friend. Why would the blonde have any indication that she wanted to be more, especially after she told Quinn about her ex-boyfriend. What this was, it was just a friendly hug, Quinn just trying to make her feel better, and Rachel felt her heart snap a little more. Quinn didn't have any experience with this? Didn't she at least have friends in kindergarten, like Rachel?

"Anytime. I mean, you of all people deserve to be happy." Quinn kicked herself for actually thinking that Rachel would want to be with her, like dating. She wanted to beat herself up because even though she was falling for the midget, hard, she knew that she couldn't actually be with her. All those fucking years of childhood had completely wrecked her.

"Thank you Quinn," Rachel missed the warm presence on her shoulder as Quinn sat up and moved over, giving Rachel some space. "But don't think that you don't deserve it either. You're a beautiful person."

Quinn blushed at Rachel's worlds and brushed her fingers through her hair nervously. She was rarely told she deserved anything but a punishment, and she had never, ever, been called beautiful. "I'm really not."

"You're the first person outside of my family that has actually treated me like I'm a human being." Rachel whispered, wanted to reach out and grab Quinn's idle hand.

"Well, I'm willing to bet money that you're better than all of these shits here. I'm… not. I'm just… I don't know. I'm not that great." Quinn felt herself freeze at the thought of Rachel seeing her back, or if the midget ever saw her penis. What would she say? Rachel wouldn't say she's a freak, she's too polite for that, but it would certainly end any possibility of a relationship.

"I'm sure you're a wonderful person, and I'm going to stop debating this." Rachel stood up, and packed away her lunch, watching as Quinn slung her bag over her shoulder. "We should really go to class now. What's yours?"

Quinn sighed, smiling, pulling the crumpled piece of paper out of her bag and handing to the midget. She pulled on the leather jacket, and rocked on the balls of her feet, waiting as Rachel read over the schedule.

"Well, you have woodshop, I have vocal. But we both have science last period." Rachel handed it back to her, wishing that they could've been lucky enough to have all the same classes. She'd have to make it to the science class from music without getting slushied.

"Aww, why couldn't you take woodshop? I'm sure you wouldn't get hurt, only a missing finger or two," Quinn laughed as Rachel shoved her gently. "I'm joking Berry, sheesh."

"I know, but if you heard me sing, you'd understand why I'm taking vocals instead." Rachel blushed as Quinn rolled her eyes, putting one hand in the crook of the blonde's elbow as they walked back to the school. "And besides, if I were to take woodshop, not only would I leave the class possibly missing an arm, you would also leave with multiple missing fingers. Power tools and I don't really mix."

"Well, you're going to have to sing for me some time." Quinn laughed at the midget's slight awkwardness. " I don't even know where the hell this class is anyway, so how am I supposed to get there?"

"It's just down the hall from my vocal class." Rachel nodded, holding a little tighter to Quinn's arm, missing the touch of her soft skin. The blonde had her hands shoved into her pockets.

"Good, I can walk you to class then. And wait for me after the bell rings." Quinn looked at Rachel's cherry red cheeks. "If you get slushied one more time today, I think I'll cut a bitch. I'm not even joking."

"The scary part is I know you're being serious." Rachel laughed, the two making their way through the crowded halls to one at the opposite end of the freaking school. Quinn pushed aside some of the braver students, glaring at the ones who looked like they might challenge her.

"'Course I am, I don't want to see you get picked on again. As long as I'm here, I'm thinking that I'll be your bodyguard." Quinn smiled like a little kid, thinking about Rachel actually looking forward to seeing her everyday.

"I think I'd agree with that arrangement. You're the protective type, strong, brave." Rachel said, her voice in a lower tone than usual, and she felt it becoming a little squeaky as she felt nerves take over. "This is my class." Rachel pulled Quinn aside, and let go of her arm, wanting to kiss the blonde quickly. "Woodshop is just down the hall, third door to your right."

"Alright, me with power tools. Someone in that class will die at the end of semester." Quinn chuckled slightly; the look on Rachel's face was slightly amused, and shocked. "It's a joke, Berry. Relax a little."

"Ok, ok, just be careful." Rachel felt Quinn take her hand gently and squeeze it before letting go and walking towards woodshop. "Please, I don't need you to be expelled or imprisoned."

"Alright princess, I promise I'll be good." Quinn looked over her shoulder to see Rachel shaking her head slightly, smiling and she went into the class. Keeping her head down, Quinn dodged around the people still moving around the halls. She ducked into woodshop quickly and huffed. Of course she was one of the only girls, and the guys in here looking like transformed apes.

She slid onto a bench beside a rough looking guy with a Mohawk, and she sneered at him when he checked her up and down. The bell rang, and the teacher stood, shutting the door and starting to talk. Quinn grabbed her sketchbook, and started half paying attention to what the teacher was saying; beginning to draw what looked like a closet door. It really didn't matter, she never pre-planned her drawings; she just let them happen.

-.-

_Quinn sits in the back of her closet, breathing heavily and silently. She holds her Cinderella doll in her hands, and she wants the mice to pop out and sing with her. She's always liked singing, even though she never gets a chance to sing much. Father hates it when she sings, Mother doesn't really care. Mother never cares about her much, the only time she helps is when Quinn is getting ready for a gymnastics competition. _

_The stomps on the stairs get louder and closer and Quinn's breathing hitches. She feels the space where she lost her front teeth tingle against the air. They've only grown in a little bit, and her gums are tingling against everything. _

_She hears a slam, and the door to her bedroom is thrust open, slamming hard against the wall. It's no use repainting the wall behind her door because of all the times like this when it has to be re-plastered. Quinn feels around the dark closet for a rosary, even though praying has never worked before. It's so strange how her church has always told her that God would help her through anything. _

_Quinn has always prayed to God, before bed, before meals, before school. She says her outer prayers, the ones her parents can hear, like Our Father and Hail Mary. Then she says her inner prayers, the ones where she asks God to make Father stop hurting her, or Mother pay attention to her. Church has always said that God listens, but Quinn's beginning to think that God take his coffee break whenever she prays. That or he throws her prayers out, because it's been 3 years since he started, she's 6 now and Father still hurts her and Mother still doesn't care. _

_The closet door opens, and Quinn blinks, getting used to the light and holding Cinderella tightly. Father stands in the doorway, looking confident and powerful, but smug. Quinn tries to keep her breathing normal, and she tries to not cry, but she feels the tears begin to fall._

"_Please Father, not tonight. Please, I'll show you I can be good. Today I forgot to study, it was just this once" Quinn sobs as he grabs her by the wrists and tugs so hard she hears a small click. She had gotten a B on her science test. It was a really hard unit, and Quinn never liked science. She had messed up on the multiple choices, and she was shaking with nerves. She had never gotten a B before. _

"_Shut up," He says, loud and clear, and Quinn bites on her lips to stop sniffling. She doesn't have a chance to stand as he pulls her to the stairs, and she feels her backside hurt as he tugs her down, slamming her against the stairs hard. She loses grip of Cinderella, and stifles a small cry as the doll lies on the stairs, forgotten for the time being. Her legs feel like Jello as he pulls her up and shoves her into his study. _

_She feels the sharp pain as her father's knee promptly connects with her back and she falls onto the floor, trying to keep breathing through the pain. She wants to stick her fingers in her ears when she hears the door slam, and wants to cry for her Mother, even though she knows Mother won't do anything. She curls into a ball, hugging her knees to her chest as tight as she possibly can, her tailbone beginning to sting as she stretches. _

_He grabs her by the back of her shirt and pulls her up, Quinn grabbing at the neckline digging into her skin. She had been a disappointment, even more so than usual, so he was going to make this hurt as much as possible. _

"_Please Father, it won't happen again. I promise." Quinn choke out as her father drops her onto the desk. She knows what's coming. _

"_Shut up," Russell spits, as she bows her head. "We give you good clothes, a good house, a decent life when we could've left you to die. You're a freak, and we gave you a chance. This is how you repay us? By acting like a stupid insolent child? You're a disgrace to this family." He begins to take off his belt, with a thick leather strap and heavyset buckle. _

_Quinn knows what he's talking about. It's because she isn't like other girls, and she knows it all too well. Her Father always tells her how much she doesn't belong. He always tells her how bad she is because she isn't "normal." _

_She feels him shove her onto the desk, and Quinn knows better than to fight against him. She doesn't want to get hit on the front as well, like the last few times when she fought back. Those cuts don't heal as fast, and aren't hidden as well._

"_Take off your shirt." Russell grunts, and Quinn obeys. She has no choice. She leans her chin on her hands and feels the cold wood of the desk on her bare stomach. She hates this so much, and she hates how she can't be normal, but the scariest thing about this is that she doesn't want to be like the other girls, she feels fine in her own body, even if it may no look "right". _

_She bites on her lower lip as the strap slams down on the scarred skin on her back, and she sucks on her thumb slightly as the buckle is dragged against it. Only now she realizes that the end is slightly jagged. She wants to cry as she feels the pain begin, and the blood begin to pool outside her body. _

_Again and again the strap is brought down, snagging onto the loose skin on her back, once getting caught in the edge of a gash. Quinn gasped in pain as Father ripped it free, and the cut extended from her lower tailbone all the way around her hip. Her head was hurting as the blood was leaving her body, and she counted how many times the belt was brought down. 18 in total, she was good with numbers. _

_Quinn lies straight, like a board. She doesn't want to move, she always hates moving when she's bleeding like this but Father never cares. He just wants her to be perfect, and he'll always try to "fix" her._

"_Lie on your back," Russell barks again, and Quinn sits up, in a daze. He's never told her that before, but she really doesn't want to lie on her back before she takes a shower. She's cold, goose bumps are covering her torso and arms._

"_I said, ON YOUR BACK!" Russell spits out furiously, slapping Quinn harshly. She reels over, holding her stinging cheek and lying on her back, the cold wood stinging against all the open cuts. She hurts so much. _

_Quinn feels her skirt bunching around her legs, and she tugs at it, trying to get rid of the bulge that happens when she lines flat. She sucks in her breath, ready for the buckle to dig into her torso as well, and she looks down at the thin pink lines on her pale stomach. _

_She feels the life force being sucked out of her when the buckle slams down on her private area, and she instinctively curls into a ball, her hands flying to where the searing pain is. She really hasn't felt pain like this before, never something so sharp and bad. It's killing her, and she hates the feeling that she can't even control her own body. She didn't mean for it to happen. It wasn't her fault that she was born with a penis, honest..._

"_Get back in position!" Russell barks again, and Quinn slowly moves back, feeling the searing pain turn into a throbbing and an aching. All she wants to do is sit in a ball and wait for it to be over. _

_The buckle is brought down 4 more times, and Quinn can't stop sobbing. She's usually really composed when he does this, but this pain hurts so badly. She's been hit there before, like when she plays soccer at school and she's goalie, but this is sharp. The buckle digs into her skirt and she thinks she's bleeding. _

"_Put on your damn top, spoiled little brat." Father watches as she painfully sits up, and slides on her shirt. It sticks to all the blood that was gathering on her back, and the open wounds cling to the fabric. They sting, and she's crying hard, harder than she has before. This hurts, so much. _

_Russell grabs her by the back of her collar, paying no attention to the blood seeping through the back of the pink shirt, and tosses her out of the study. He slams the door, and takes a rag, wiping the blood off his desk._

_Quinn lies outside, on her left side. Her hands are cupping her privates, the pain won't go away there, and she can barely breathe because her back hurts. She's gasping for every breath. So much pain. The sting of the belt buckle had traveled through her skirt, and she brings one hand closer to her face to see a few spots of blood in her palm. _

_She can hear someone moving around in the front hall, and she can hear the footsteps getting closer as her Mother comes down the hall. Just barely through her tears can she see her Mother's heels as she walks right by the tiny blonde. Quinn doesn't want to even imagine she's Cinderella now, it hurts too much, inside, knowing she won't ever be special. _

_The footsteps appear again and Quinn feels her Mother picking her up gently. She tenses at the touch, she's not used to Mother acting so kindly towards her. She feels lightheaded as she rests her head on her Mother's shoulder, and wishes it could always be like this; so kind, so gentle. Father would never hit her again, and Quinn feels the pang in her chest again as she cries. He'll always hit her, she'll never be perfect. _

_Judy takes the girl gently in her arms and brings her up the stairs, ignoring the basket of laundry lying discarded in the hallway. She brings a hand to Quinn's back, drawing it forward again to see blood soaking through the top onto her fingers. She opens the door to Quinn's room, and lies the girl out, face first, on her bed. _

_Not Mother too, Quinn thinks, Mother never hurts her. Quinn whimpers as she feels Mother pull her top off gently, the pain in her front has slowed. She bites her lip as a burning liquid is put on her back, and a biting cloth is rubbed over them. The one long gash hurts so much, but Mother is gentle. Quinn cries so hard, her chest hurts and she can barely breathe; life is never this kind to her. _

_The feelings get normal, and Quinn's sobs turn to sniffles as Judy tears off tape and presses antibacterial clothes to her back, doing her best to keep the wounds airtight. She's cleaned them all, after seeing the cigarette ash dug into the cuts from Quinn lying on that desk. _

_Quinn knows the bleeding below her waistline has stopped because now there's only a dull ache. She's so tired; she can barely keep her eyes open. Her cheeks are wet with tears, but all she wants to do is sleep. She feels her Mother kiss her gently, and wants to burst into tears again. _

"_Don't tell your Father I did this. I'll change the bandages tomorrow after you come home from school," Judy issues a warning, and looks at Quinn, so tired on her bed. Wasn't this supposed to be her baby, the one who spent nine months in her womb and who she nursed? She couldn't fathom, at this time, why she had detached herself from the sweet little blonde, but she knew when she talked with Russell she would know exactly why. She leans down and kisses the top of Quinn's head, feeling the child go tense. _

_Quinn hears the door close and she starts crying hard. The lights are shut and it's dark outside, so she can be a vampire and be awake in peace. Why did Mother have to be nice to her? Now she would expect it and she would start crying when she was ignored. _

"_Why don't you help me?" Quinn whispers, her voice scratchy, like she's trying to scream but it's not working. "Why don't you save me from him? Aren't I your daughter? How much do you hate me too" Quinn reaches over weakly and grabs a discarded bear on her bed, hugging it tightly, the soft brown fur nuzzling against her nose. "Why don't you love me? How bad do you think I am? Am I so bad that I don't deserve to be loved?" _

-.-

Quinn felt the mohawked boy shove her hard while the teacher talked, and Quinn snapped out of her stupor to look at what she's drawn. Her Father's study is there, plain as anything, and there's blood on almost every surface. She then looks up at the guy, ready to punch him back.

"That's really cool. Is it all just out of your head?" He looked at her, honestly paying attention to her. Weird guy.

"Yeah, it's all me." Quinn said back, trying to sound defensive, but he just nodded his head and shrugged his shoulders. She can't understand why he's talking to her, but she lets it slide. He doesn't seem that stupid, at least not as stupid as the blonde in math class.

"Well, it's really cool. You should be taking art instead of woodshop like the rest of us." He played with the pencil between his fingers and Quinn could see he had drawn a crude stick figure on the table while the teacher rambled.

"Yeah, but art class sucks; they always tell you what to draw, and that is not what I do. I'll draw what I want, when I want." Quinn snickered, thinking of the last art class she went too. Apparently, the art teacher's hair was tinged blue for a week after she was kicked out.

"Agreed, teachers always want us to conform and shit. Some people aren't meant for that, and those people become mechanics." The mohawked guy took off his jean jacket to reveal a plain black shirt underneath. "I'm Puck, just so you know."

"I'm Quinn," she nodded towards him, and looked at the clock on the wall. "Holy shit, has the teacher been babbling all this time. We have 5 minutes left." Quinn shoved the sketchbook into her bag, and tucked the pencil behind her ear.

"Yeah, and we're all bored out of out fucking minds." Puck tossed the pencil into his tattered blue backpack, and leaned on the table, staring at the clock.

"Should've brought a sketchbook." Quinn smiled, swiveling around on her bench and standing, swinging her bag over her shoulder, watching as Puck gave her another once-over. Pig.

"Yeah, but I can't draw." Puck stood as well, hovering closer to Quinn than she liked. "You seriously like superheroes. Aren't they, like, for nine year old guys?"

"Fuck off, Batman is and always will be awesome." Quinn was relieved when the bell rang, and shoved her way past Puck. She had missed Rachel a lot more than she expected herself too. The midget was growing on her.

"Hey, alright, I didn't know you'd get so pissed off about it." Puck blocked her as she ran to the door, and Quinn tugged her hat onto her head as Puck tried to tug it off. "Lemme make it up to you, I'll walk you to your next class."

"Beat it loser, I already have someone waiting for me." Quinn ducked under Puck's extended arm and ran out into the hall, seeing Rachel hovering in the doorway to her music class down the hall.

"Oh yeah, who is it?" Puck sneered at her, clearly pissed to be brushed off so easily. He was pissing Quinn off, and she wasn't afraid to punch him, really hard, but she wasn't sure if her hand could take the impact of a skull that was made of concrete. She saw Rachel's face brighten as the midget saw her, and then the smile fell as viewed Puck. Great, this asshole also slushied the midget, and she was stuck with him for a semester, with power tools; maybe not so bad. No, she had promised Rachel that she'd be good, so Puck would unfortunately walk out with his head every day.

"Don't you have a dumpster to head to, and some pot to go smoke?" Quinn shoved him away from her and he grabbed her wrist. Fuck, he should've have done that. Oh, he really should not have done that. Chauvinistic pig that he was, Puck reminded her of her Father too.

Quinn felt the nerves ball in her stomach and slammed his face hard with the flat of her palm, hearing another crack. She pulled her wrist away from him and ran to Rachel, grabbing the midget and pulling her along.

"Oh my goodness Quinn, what happened?" Rachel saw the flashes of terror across Quinn's face, and she shoved her way through the crowds. Rachel felt herself being pulled along by Quinn, hoping that the blonde would eventually open up to her about all these little things.

"Nothing, the guy was being a prick." Quinn stopped suddenly, in front of the trophy case, trying to catch her breath. She looked down at Rachel, who looked worried. Fuck, now she had worried the midget, and she wouldn't shut up with the questions. "Where's the science class?"

"What did he do?" Rachel put a hand on Quinn's shoulder, looking at her, but the blonde kept her eyes to the floor. She wanted to reach out and hug Quinn, trying to make her feel better, but the blonde would most likely pull away. Rachel gently led the taller girl down the hall, waiting for an answer as they walked in silence.

Quinn stopped dead outside the science class, pressing herself against the wall beside the door. Stupid, goddamn Latina bitch was sitting in her spot by the window. Fucking slut, but the dumb blonde was nowhere to be seen. "Is Santana a genius?"

"I don't know," Rachel felt herself screech to a halt when Quinn ducked to the side of the doorway, one hand now resting in the crock of the blonde's elbow. "I know she's typically in Honours classes, so I'd assume she's smart."

"That sucks" Quinn huffed, pulling her bracelets down to cover her wrists. She looked up at Rachel, who still looked worried, and she felt a pit form in her stomach. The midget wouldn't calm down until she knew what had spooked Quinn so badly. "That mohawked ass, Puck. He grabbed my wrists. No one grabs my wrists, ever."

Rachel's mind flashed to the morning, when she had taken a loose hold of the blonde's wrists and she had pulled back like a frightened rabbit. "But you didn't punch me like you did him."

"You're not an asshole." Quinn sighed, and started shifting uncomfortably. She didn't want to go into that class, she hated science. She had a small scar on the shaft of her penis that reminded her of her hatred for the class, because she hadn't gotten perfection on one fucking elementary school science test. This class was horrible. "And he pulled at my wrists. Rachel, swear to me that you'll never do that."

"I won't ever pull you by the wrist." Rachel swore, looking at Quinn's face for any sign of emotion. So many waves of sadness and fear, and guilt were passing across the blonde's face that Rachel didn't know how to reach out to her. "Let's just go to class, and get through it and then the day is over."

Quinn nodded, still reluctant to go into the room. "You'll be my lab partner right?" She finally tugged off the hat, and smoothed out the lengthy side of her hair. She saw Rachel smile at her, the midget's cheeks turning their natural shade of crimson.

"Of course. I don't know why you felt the need to ask that." Rachel smiled, brushing a stray strand of hair away from Quinn's face.

"Then let's just finish this day, and then after, you can let me take you out for coffee." Quinn smirked at the slightly stunned look on Rachel's face, and went inside the classroom, sitting at the far back lab bench next to the window. She laughed into her palm as the midget came into the room, slightly dazed, but smiling.

Rachel dropped her bag on the floor next to Quinn, and smiled sheepishly. "Oh really? Who says you are?" Rachel bit her lip nervously as Quinn looked down again, smiling.

"I said so." Quinn pulled out a binder, and Rachel was curious as to why she left her sketchbook in her bag, but she didn't question it. "And I'm driving. You deserve a treat today, after all those fucking slushies."

"Well, today was actually quite weak compared to some days. The record is has to be easily over 100 in one day." Rachel wanted to forget that horrible day, where she was constantly being pelted with the icy drinks, and she felt her breath escape her when Quinn reached out, taking her hand gently. "That day must've been school-wide Slushie Rachel Berry day."

"Well, those fuckers won't do it anymore. I'll guarantee it." Quinn smiled, feeling Rachel's hand in hers. She didn't wish anymore, those damn things brought too much sadness, but if she did, she'd wish that Rachel could be her girlfriend.

"Thanks Quinn," Rachel smiled, and Quinn smiled back. The door slammed, bringing both girls out of their trances, and Quinn sighed, opening the notebook as the bitch at the front started talking. This class was going to take for-fucking-ever.


	3. Paranoid

**I finally edited this. Sorry if there is still spelling/grammar/continuity errors. I don't own any of Glee or the movies mentioned. **

**Again, major thanks to everyone who reviewed, favourited, or followed this story. It keeps me writing. Maybe this story can have 35 reviews by chapter 4?  
**

**So thanks a bunch, and here's chapter 3.  
**

**Warning! Rape scene.  
**

* * *

Quinn bobbed her head in time to the music. The bitch at the front of the class had finally shut up with whatever point she was trying to get across and just gave out the homework. It was easy shit too, chemistry always was. Making smoke bombs and firecrackers was especially fun, and that was why she had gotten kicked out of her old Iowa school, in a nutshell.

"Quinn can you please lower your music, I can hear it." Rachel blushed when Quinn looked at her with that one smile. The one that was egging her to continue, although Rachel wasn't sure with what.

"What exactly are you hearing?" Quinn smirked, waiting for Rachel to say exactly what she could hear. It was so cute how the brunette's cheeks turned a bright shade of red each time she got the even a little embarrassed.

"I'm hearing music," Rachel gritted her teeth as she heard the volume increase. Of course, Quinn wanted to know details. She knew the lyrics of course, Finn would always blare that artist when they were driving, but she really wasn't about to say them. Not now that the teacher had just chewed out a few students for talking.

"What exactly can you hear?" Quinn leaned in towards Rachel, smiling at her. God, the brunette looked slightly pissed off to go with the embarrassment. She knew she was being quiet, but she wasn't sure if Rachel had that setting.

"Shake that ass for me, shake that ass for me, C'mon girl, shake that ass for me." Rachel murmured through clenched teeth and Quinn broke out into a huge grin. The class was dead silent, and Rachel's hushed words, no matter how low, were heard by everyone.

"Ms. Berry, do you have something to say?" The bitch at the front looking directly at Rachel, and Quinn bit her lip to contain laughter. Rachel shot her a look filled with daggers before looked at the teacher, her face as red as a tomato.

"No Ms Anderson, I didn't say anything." Rachel said sweetly, and she saw through the corner of her eye as Quinn put her head face first on the desk and stifled laughter. She ripped out a piece of paper, scribbled on it and shoved it towards Quinn

_I'm glad your happy, the class now thinks I'm a lesbian._ Quinn shook her head, still smiling as she read the note, and scribbled something back. She tossed the crumbled ball onto Rachel's open notebook

_*You're ;) what's the big deal, just laugh it off. Besides, if anyone harasses you, I'll beat them up. _Rachel rolled her eyes at Quinn's spell check. She would not have pegged the blonde to be that detail oriented, but she should know better than to judge her after everything that happened during the day. She smiled softly at Quinn's pledge to violence, although she knew that fighting would only get the blonde in trouble.

Quinn looked up from her notebook as the paper hit her in the head, and she picked it up._ You would do that for me?_ She blushed slightly, reading the neat writing and felt her heart jump a little. Rachel was sweet, really sweet.

_Of course, what makes you think otherwise? Berry, I think it's known that I'm your bodyguard. _Rachel read Quinn's words with a slight smile on her face and she peeked over at the blonde to see her actually doing the homework. She wanted to kiss the blonde right here, but of course not. This was flirting right? She really wouldn't know; she hadn't flirted before. Finn only started dating her after he explained he was flirting with her.

_Thanks ;) still on for coffee? _Quinn felt the paper bump against her jacket and she reached over, reading it slowly. Did Rachel even have to ask?

_Ah, but of course. I'm paying. _Quinn folded the paper into a plane and tossed it gently towards Rachel. She watched in vague horror as it flew neatly over the brunette's head and landed on the floor, in plain sight of Ms. Bitch.

Rachel saw the paper land, and she saw the pink hearts that Quinn had drawn on it. She lunged out quickly and snatched it up, feeling the teacher's eyes on her, as well as half the class. Her fingers gently brushed the paper before she heard the squeak of her chair and she fell flat on her face below the lab bench. She grabbed the paper before even speaking and she stood up right away, grabbing her chair and sitting down. Of course Quinn was smiling at her, hell; the blonde probably thought that was cute.

"Ms. Berry, can you give me that note?" Ms. Bitch was standing at the front behind her desk, and Quinn saw Rachel's face turn a shade of white that she hadn't seen. Damn, she wasn't just embarrassed now, she was downright petrified, and Quinn knew she couldn't beat up a teacher. She grabbed the note out of Rachel's hands, and unfurled it, standing up. She then blew her nose in it.

That got the class snickering. Apparently, no one messed with the Bitch at the front of the classroom, and the teacher did look livid. Quinn then spat onto the paper, and stepped out from behind the lab bench. She strutted up to the front and slammed the wet paper into the old bat's hand, trying to keep a straight face.

"Ms Fabray, do you think this is a joke?" the old broad's lips were becoming thin, and Quinn wanted to burst out in laughter. But why lie now? She's already in trouble.

"Well, this is science class." She snickered as the rest of the class burst into laughter. She turned to see Rachel looking shocked at the back of the class and she smiled at the midget. She meant what she said, that she would protect her, but if even the teachers were picking on the brunette, Quinn would have to get creative.

"Detention for all of next week, do you understand me?" Quinn flinched as beads of spit hit her and her face twisted in disgust.

"Listen lady, haven't you heard say it, don't spray it? And actually, Ms. Garden Hose, I'm busy this afternoon, I have a date. Therefore, we'll have to meet up some other time. I'm not missing it for the world, and some old bat like you is not keeping me cooped up in a classroom for an hour, by myself." Quinn looked at her, solemn. No way in hell was she ditching Rachel to hang out with the runaway from Jurassic Park.

That certainly left the woman speechless, and Quinn strutted back to her seat, thumping down beside Rachel and finishing the last of the goddamn questions. She pulled out her sketchbook and started drawing cartoon dinosaurs. She was sure that the brunette hadn't moved since she had told the teacher off, and she looked at Rachel, to see that they were staring eye to eye.

"What were you thinking?" Rachel whispered, but it was drowned out by the buzz from the rest of the class. How could Quinn go up there, and tell off one of the oldest and meanest teacher's in the school. Sure Ms. Anderson really couldn't hold a candle to the likes of Coach Sylvester, but she was probably right up there.

"I told you I wasn't going to let anyone pick on you, and that goes for teachers." Quinn smiled, looking at the shock on Rachel's face as the realization sunk in. The white colour drained from her face and was replaced with a ruby red on her cheeks. Her brown eyes really popped against the soft pink colour.

"Thank you," Rachel leaned back in her chair, and looked blankly at her paper. Quinn had gone up there and called their coffee outing a date; a legitimate date. Not the football games that Finn considered "dates", this was a date indoors, with coffee and talking and compliments and relaxation. She wanted to bounce up and down in her seat and kiss Quinn so passionately that she wouldn't be able to pry herself off the blonde. Trying not to jump on the blonde was really difficult; the way Quinn's head was tilted, and something about that bad girl persona she was trying to embody was hot, extremely hot.

"I'm driving too," Quinn was glad she had tossed her clothes in the trunk this morning, so at least Rachel would see a clean car. She looked up at Rachel to see one hand placed idle on the edge of the chair while she wrote. Hesitantly, Quinn reached out and took it, feeling the soft skin under her fingertips. She smiled softly, wanting to kiss Rachel badly, but she could settle for hold hands for now. That was the first step in dating right?

Rachel felt her heart skip a beat as Quinn took her hand. She knew that she had to go at Quinn's pace with the touching part of the relationship. The way she jumped at certain things had been an indication for Rachel that Quinn really had some issues to work out, and she knew that meant going slow, and letting Quinn make the first move.

The remaining half hour of the period was filled with spiteful looks from the teacher, directed to the blonde, and the two holding hands underneath the table. Quinn knew if she even tried drawing a line with her left hand it would look like a 3 year old, but she would much rather hold Rachel's hand then sketch little cartoon dinos.

Noticing the time, Quinn dropped Rachel's hand and started putting her stuff into her bag. She could see the crumpled white shirt and yellow sweater that Rachel had on that morning lying on the bottom of her bag, and she determined the Black Sabbath shirt to look so much better than the pastel colors. Rachel looked downright sexy in that outfit.

"So what's the best coffee joint in town?" Quinn said; standing and swinging the bag over her shoulder.

"Well, there's a Starbucks and Second Cup in plazas around town. There's also this really nice little coffee shop called Coffee Talk beside the bank. It's small and very cozy." Rachel nodded as she talked, and slid her binder in her bag as well, making a mental list to see if she had any reason to go back to her locker.

"Cool, but you're going to need to tell me how to get there. Haven't been in this town long enough to know everything." Quinn popped out a pack of gum and offered some to Rachel before taking a piece herself. She smacked it loudly, seeing the Latina glare at her as well. "I hate that Latina Bitch."

"Oh I do too, trust me, you're not alone with that issue." Rachel smiled and picked up her bag. "I have to go quickly by my locker. Just drop off my textbooks and such."

"Alright, no one will be waiting there right" Quinn gave a tired look to Rachel, and the brunette smiled.

"Well, usually it would be this one boy with a Mohawk; he's supposedly dating Santana and always tries to slushie me at least 3 times a day. But I don't think I have to fear him tonight seeing as you broke his nose in the hallway." Rachel giggled slightly as Quinn gently shoved her.

"I didn't break his nose." The blonde put on arm around Rachel's shoulders as the bell rang and held her tightly as they walked out of class. She slammed Santana into the doorframe again, grinning. "It gets better each time I do that."

"I'd love to try it, but I don't think I have the guts." Rachel felt her stomach do jumping jacks as her and Quinn walked through the halls. She had to admit, it was a glorious feeling, to be protected. She hadn't felt this way before, and she didn't even want to go for coffee anymore, she'd be happy just kissing Quinn in the blonde's car. She couldn't; of course, it had to be Quinn who made the first move.

Quinn, on the other hand, really had no idea what to do. This was her first time, liking a person, feeling that weird pit in her stomach when they held hands, actually wanting to kiss Rachel. She felt out of place, especially knowing that Rachel had dated Finn before. "So how long were you and Finn, a couple?"

"Not too long really, he wanted to… consummate … the relationship and I didn't. He really wasn't happy, very angry actually, when I told him that and I thought he would do something we would both regret." Rachel said quietly, trying to put that incident out of her head and she felt Quinn's grip tighten.

"Fuck, that bastard is a bigger douche than I thought. That's saying something." Quinn tried to put that mental image out of her head. She knew what Rachel was trying to say, and she sure as hell wasn't going to make her say it. That dick, that cocky asshole; Quinn thought she was going to see red, but she just tightened her grip on the midget and kept walking. She didn't even want to think of that ape putting his hands on Rachel. Man, she really needed to learn to control herself before she killed someone.

"Well, nothing happened, and I'm grateful for that. He just insists on a cherry shower everyday. He and his friends will honestly come behind me and dump slushies on me." Rachel stopped at her locker and Quinn reluctantly let go of her. She shoved the binders into her locker and looked at the worried look on the blonde's face. She really shouldn't have gone into detail, and she realized that it would only make Quinn worry a little more.

"Hi Rachel," Both girl looked up to see Brittany smiling at the midget. Quinn knew her from math class; it was the crazy cat lady.

"Hi Brittany." Rachel smiled at her. She couldn't be rude to the Head Cheerleader's best friend; doing that might as well be a death sentence. Brittany really wasn't a bad person; she just hung out with the worst person on the planet.

"You're the new girl right?" Brittany turned her attention to Quinn, and she saw Rachel smile in amusement.

"Yeah, I'm Quinn." The blonde nodded at the cat lady, and stuck out her hand. Politeness, another thing her Father had drilled into her. It sucked more often than not, but she had tried getting rid of it and she couldn't. Stupid, goddamn mental conditioning.

"Hi! I'm Brittany." The bubbly girl shook Quinn's hand, and looked over her shoulder. She turned back to Rachel looking a little disappointed. "So are you coming to glee club this afternoon?"

"Not today Brittany, I'm going out for coffee. Why do you ask?" Rachel felt a little bad for the tall blonde. She certainly wasn't the smartest, but now she seemed so sad. Santana must be cheating on her again. It was an open secret that the bubbly blonde was in love with the Latina bitch.

"Oh, ok. I was just wondering if we could've partnered if there was a duet. I know you usually go with Kurt, but I heard him and Mercedes talking about working together." Brittany looked idly down the hall, and Rachel felt bad for her. Santana was a bitch to everyone, but Rachel really couldn't understand why she would be so mean to Brittany.

"Well, if we are given a duet assignment, I'll work with you. Just tell Mr. Shue." Rachel nodded at Brittany and got a hug in return. She really didn't grasp the concept of high school hierarchy.

"Thanks Rachel, see you tomorrow." Brittany walked off into the hall, looking a little lost, "Bye Quinn."

Quinn just looked at her before turning back to Rachel "Why did you just waste your breath with her?"

Rachel shut her locker and carried her bag in front of her. She smiled as Quinn's arm took up its place over her shoulders. "I'll explain everything in the car, and she has never slushied me."

"She seems like an idiot." Quinn pulled Rachel closer to her, and pushed open the door. Clouds had rolled over Lima, and Quinn was glad the heat was leaving. It was really becoming unbearable in these tights.

"Oh, she really is, but she's nice enough when she's not with Santana." The parking lot was swarming with students, and Rachel felt the urge to just put her head down and hope to avoid slushies. She could see a few students with them already, and repressed the urge to giggle like a maniac when they looked at Quinn. It was the first time she had seen them being emptied onto the ground instead of on her face. "So where's your car?"

"It's at the very back. Nothing special. It was a gift really." In reality, it was a parting gift, and she had come home one day to see it in the driveway with most of her clothes packed. Quinn pulled the keys out of her pocket and unlocked the door. The car beeped, and Quinn opened the door for Rachel.

"Well, it's a very nice Civic. I was expecting it to be black though." Rachel tossed her bag into the backseat, and tried to refrain from blushing. Quinn certainly knew how to treat a girl. "White doesn't suit you."

"Yeah, well, I had no choice. It would've been black though." Quinn adjusted the mirrors again, and took off the leather jacket before pulling out of the parking spot. She took the taser from her pocket and dropped it into the cup holder. The Batman keychain clattered hung from the review mirror, and Rachel smiled at the personal touches. "Explain to me this Brittany/Queen Bitch dynamic."

"Ok, first turn left." Rachel leaned in the comfortable chair, and felt a little more relaxed now that the school was pulling out of sight. If this was any other person, she would've been terrified to get into their car, afraid of what their intentions were. With Quinn, she could tell it was something different, and she was determined to enjoy it as much as she could. "Anyways, Brittany and Santana are always together, always. That is, unless Santana and Puck are somewhere making out because they are 'dating'.

"And why is Brittany upset about this." Quinn was surprised at how big this town actually was, but her father really had no preference about where they lived. It didn't matter where she was, he always dragged her along.

"It's because everyone knows that Brittany and Santana are dating, or at least that Brittany is in love with her. I've heard a few conversations between the two, and I hate how Santana is so heartless towards her. Turn right," The drive was relaxing, and Rachel had almost missed the turn towards the banks. It was such a calm atmosphere, like they had known each other for years.

"Why do you know all this?" Quinn smiled, and turned. She quickly took Rachel's hand before the brunette had a chance to fully respond, intertwining their fingers quickly.

"I've spent a lot of time inside the school washrooms in the morning…and I overhear a lot of their conversations while I get cleaned up in the stalls." Rachel stammered, feeling Quinn's motion for her hand. Even with such fast motions, it still felt romantic. "Another left now."

Quinn obliged, and saw the small coffee nook that Rachel was talking about. If it weren't for the huge sign with arrows, Quinn would've driven right past it. It was a little basement shop, the arrows pointed towards a stairwell heading down. "This looks like something out of a movie."

"It has the best coffee, and their strawberry cheesecake is amazing." The cheesecake was the only time Rachel ever broke her vegan diet, which was saying something.

"So try the cheesecake, got it." Quinn got out of the car, and slid across her hood, reaching Rachel's door to open it. She extended her hand to Rachel, leading her out of the car.

"Thank you," Rachel smiled, taking Quinn's outstretched hand. The blonde was certainly getting bolder. She felt the butterflies when Quinn didn't let go, and locked the car door. She opened the door to the little café and Rachel stepped inside, still holding Quinn's hand.

The staircase was narrow, and there pictures mounted on the walls kept bumping into Quinn's shoulder. Rachel went ahead of her, still holding her hand, and Quinn was blushing, she knew it. This was probably the most romantic thing she had ever done, and Rachel's touch was driving her crazy. She was using all her will to contain herself.

Quinn had to admit though; the little coffee shop was very nice. It was filled with small tables, and much more spacious than Quinn would've thought. The counter smelled like freshly ground coffee and cake. Delicious cake. "This really looks like something out of a movie."

"I know, I love it here." Rachel stepped up to the counter and ordered 2 slices of the strawberry cheesecake and a soy latté for herself. "What would you like?"

"Regular coffee would be good, vanilla hazelnut please." Quinn scanned the flavours on the chalkboard and inhaled the mix of the caffeine. The smell was enough to get a buzz.

Quinn handed the cashier a crumpled 10 dollar bill, and took the coffees while Rachel balanced the cheesecakes in each hand. Making their way through the small tables, they sat at a booth in the corner of the room with some scenery painting behind them. Quinn sipped the coffee, and smiled.

"If you think that's good, try this." Rachel slid the cake over, and speared a piece with her fork. Quinn opened her mouth as the brunette fed her, and felt her cheeks become hot. The flavour exploded, and Quinn opened her mouth for another piece.

"Very good." Quinn nodded, taking the fork from Rachel and began to feed herself. "What's glee club?"

"Your old school didn't have one?" Rachel took a piece of the cake, scolding herself for a second before eating the delicious, spongy dessert.

"Nope, never heard of it before." Quinn smirked at Rachel's slight shock. "What?"

"Nothing," Rachel shook off her appearance, and took a sip of her coffee. "It's basically a club that is composed of singing and dancing. It's mostly musical numbers and such."

"You must be the star of it, right?" Quinn hid a toothy grin in her coffee while the familiar red shade took its rightful place on Rachel's face.

"Well, I guess so. I don't mean to brag much, but I am very good." Rachel honestly never received compliments from anyone outside her family, and the school faculty. She really should've remembered that this was Quinn, and it was only a matter of time before she said something like that. It felt good.

"Then you're going to have to sing for me sometime. Something soft and nice…" Quinn ran her fingers along the edge of the cup, trying to drop hints. "Something romantic."

Rachel really couldn't have a heart attack now, not when everything was beginning to seem so nice. She couldn't believe her ears; had Quinn really just suggested that? She couldn't believe it. She reached her hand out and took the blonde's away from the edge of the cup, grinning foolishly while Quinn had that playful smile on her face. "Oh course I have to. This is a date correct?"

"Yeah, I would call it that." Quinn tried to shove the voices of her head that was saying this was not a good idea. She sort of agreed with them, why should she show Rachel how fucked up she was, but she really couldn't deny the brunette right now. She wished she had brought her jacket at least, so she could cover her lap. At least her shirt reached to mid thigh.

"Well then, I'll pick a good song, and sing it for you next time we do something like this." Rachel picked up her fork again, and fed a bit of cake to Quinn. She was trying to keep her emotions in check, but she really had no idea how. "So you really like to draw?"

"Yeah, I don't know if it's any good though. I never took formal lessons." Quinn tried to imagine what it would be like to draw Rachel. Like in that one scene from Titanic, where Leo's character draws the girl. Quinn really wished she had brought her jacket, that mental image was really sending her over the edge.

Rachel could see something on Quinn's face, discomfort maybe? She felt a wave of panic. Was she doing something wrong? She really did want to kill this off before something wonderful had a chance to happen "Maybe you could draw me sometime?"

Fuck, well that did it. Quinn furiously pulled her shirt over her legs and crossed them hastily, feeling real pain. Thank god she was good at hiding emotions; she had learned that well over the years. "Of course, but that wouldn't be fair for you."

"Why not?" Yes, there was definitely something on Quinn's face, and it was driving Rachel crazy how she couldn't determine what it is.

"Because, anything with you in it is bound to be beautiful. Quinn breathed out, feeling the wanting to just reach over and kiss Rachel. "You wouldn't be seeing my regular sketches, which probably aren't that great."

Rachel tried to say something, but nothing would come out. She opened her mouth a few times to whisper a response, yet all she could manage were a few squeaks. She nodded and blushed, feeling a little lightheaded with happiness, praying that Quinn wouldn't ever leave her. It was amazing how connections could be made so easily.

"Well, if you were to see some pictures from my childhood, you wouldn't say that." She finally got out, trying to think of something witty. She clearly couldn't manage a thank you.

"I don't believe you." Quinn leaned on the table, her chin in her hand, playing with the black balls at the ends of her piercing again. She was still trying to get the image of Rachel lying across a bed out of her mind.

"Then you'll have to come over and see it for yourself." Rachel sipped the coffee. "I was this scrawny little kid, with frizzy hair and buck teeth."

"I wasn't the best looking little kid either, trust me." Quinn thought of the younger version of herself, trying to remember what she looked like. All she could remember was family portraits, of her standing pin straight beside her mother, all made up like a miniature doll. "I was that weird little kid who didn't really talk to many people."

"Why? You were the only little girl who liked superheroes?" Rachel half laughed until she saw a flicker of emotion on Quinn's face. The blonde inhaled and shook her head slightly.

"No, I actually really liked Cinderella when I was younger, but I never really fit in. I felt different, like I was a vampire half the time." Quinn felt memories coming, and she hated it. They could stay repressed for the longest time, but with one damn trigger word, everything would come back and just play in her mind. It was easy to pay attention while they crossed her mind sure, but they would stay in her subconscious until she could focus on them. When she focused, she would either burst into tears, or punch something.

"That's different. I used to pretend I was a gorilla when I was younger because I remember loving the Tarzan movie so much. My knuckles always hurt because I would try and walk on them. It was easier to pretend to be an elephant." Rachel smiled as Quinn laughed. "Why a vampire though?"

"I don't know. I guess it was because I spent a ton of time by myself and in the dark." Quinn whispered, seeing the curious look on Rachel's face. She wasn't about to go into details though, not here, not now, hopefully not ever. She took a sip of her coffee, remembering slightly what it was like to live in the basement during the holidays. "So you loved Tarzan? Any other movies I should pick for our next outing?"

-.-

_Quinn sits on the steps to the basement, and hugs Cinderella. She didn't get a chance to change out of her party clothes, and her Rudolph the Reindeer sweater is the only thing keeping her warm. The basement at this house isn't finished, and the pink stuff on the walls looks like pillows, and she wants to sleep now. She's so tired. _

_But the basement is so scary; she doesn't understand why she was put here again. Father said it was because she was rude at the guest's house. She wasn't rude though, she said hello to everyone, and helped clear the table, and even watched over that little baby while the parents went outside for a smoke. _

_Quinn smiles, he was a cute baby. His name was Jack, and he had the biggest brown eyes she had ever seen. He couldn't talk, but he kept smiling at her. It felt good to have that. No one ever smiled at her, she didn't deserve it. Father always said she never deserved kindness, but he said that to Mother. She overheard him saying it once. It's because she's different. _

_Quinn goes over the night's activities in her head. She was nice to everybody, and she didn't even yell at that little boy who threw a wooden train at her private area. She grimaced slightly at the thought. Boys always threw things at her, and she never understood why. Maybe it was because they thought girls wouldn't get hurt there. _

_The basement is looking really scary with only the moonlight coming through the small windows. The boxes look like coffins for a vampire, and the broken bed frame is leaning out like a monster. Quinn stands, leaving Cinderella on the stairs, and walks in her stocking feet towards a table beside the large freezer. _

"_Don't worry Cinderella; I'll turn on a light. I just need a chair." Quinn drags a chair from the table, and under the light switch. It's really high on the wall, beside one of the windows. The only other switch is on the wall beside the door, and Father locked her in the basement. She's so cold. _

_Quinn jumps to get at the switch, but she still can't reach. She tries to jump higher and her fingers brush the edge of the switch. She bends down real small, and uses all her strength to jump really high. She doesn't hit the light switch though. The chair falls over and she lands hard on the round legs, falling back and hitting her head against the concrete floor. The chair made a really loud crash too, and she feels nervous, hoping Father won't come down and punish her._

_He was tired tonight, that's the only reason she wasn't punished. She could barely get into her stockings today though, because it hurt so much from last night. She didn't even hear him come into her room, and she had just got out of the shower. Quinn presses her hands against her eyes, trying to forget everything. It was so much easier when she just forgot. _

_It's getting colder in the basement though, and Quinn wants a blanket. She was hungry too, and she didn't know if there would be any food in the freezer. Father had told her she wasn't to eat anything at the dinner they went to. Quinn's eyes widen as she realizes what happened. Father told her not to eat and he also told her not to decline anything the host offered. _

_Quinn screams in frustration, but not really. It's a scream where her lips are hammered shut and her scream goes right up to her head, so she gets a headache. Quinn stands up, and goes to the pink fluffy stuff in the walls, and she punches it hard. It's not fair, it's not fair! How could she be good if Father told her to do the impossible? She's not perfect and she's not a witch who can use magic to do both! _

"_Cinderella, I'm a vampire!" Quinn says to the doll, and she grabs the Christmas tree skirt, wrapping it around herself. She doesn't see any toys in the basement; Father never lets her have many and they're all really girly toys. She goes into a box, and sees his construction helmet, so she puts it on. "See, I have my cloak and my hood, I'm living in the dark, and I have no friends. All I'm missing is a castle. If I had a castle, I'd run away and never come back." She says this louder than she means to and she raises a piece of the bed frame like a staff._

_She runs to the freezer, and opens it after a lot of trouble. She needs strength because the door is so heavy, and she doesn't have any because she hasn't eaten. The first thing she sees is cake, chocolate cake. Yum! Nothing is better than cake, she doesn't care what happens; she'll always eat cake. _

_Quinn nearly jumps into the freezer, and grabs the tin. She pries open the lid, and grabs a fistful of the chocolate goodness and scarfs it down. It tastes so good; she hasn't eaten anything in 2 days because Father is saying she has to be skinnier for a gymnastics competition. _

_She wishes her mouth was like a cartoon character's and she could eat the cake whole. It has to be Mother's cooking, because it doesn't have a label on the box and Mother is such a good cook._

_Her heart nearly stops though, because she hears footsteps, but she's so hungry, she can't stop eating now. The door opens at the top of the stairs, and Quinn grabs Cinderella, tucking her under her arm while she slams the lid on the cake and tosses it back into the freezer. _

_Mother and Father are at the top of the stairs and Quinn blinks at the light. She has chocolate smeared all over her face, and Father's construction helmet on. The Christmas tree skirt is so warm now, and she could sleep right until New Years now. Father's angry, very angry. She tosses the helmet off her head; he never wears it unless it's for fixing the backyard, but she knows he always gets really angry when she touches his things._

"_What the hell did you do?" He screams at her as he storms down the stairs. Quinn is too tired to think properly and she can't think of a good lie. _

"_I was hungry." She says; she feels like she's 4 inches tall. Father grabs her by her dress collar, and lifts her into the air. She feels like she can't breath, and she can see Mother looking in the freezer. She claws at the neckline digging into her skin, and feels like she's going to faint._

"_Well, she ate the cake we were supposed to bring for tomorrow's Christmas dinner." Mother says, shaking her head. Quinn wants to cry, this was going to hurt, a lot. She didn't know that they were going out, honest. It just looked so good, and she was so hungry. _

"_You stubborn, selfish child." Father hisses and his spit gets on her face. Quinn feels herself being thrown across the basement, and she lands hard on the concrete. She licks her lips slightly, and her stomach growls. The chocolate tastes so good. She hears footsteps going up the stairs, and they have to be Mother's. _

"_I'm sorry Father, it won't happen again. I'm sorry." Quinn pleas, hearing the rustling of fabric and her stockings being pulled off her legs. They're her favourite stockings too, white and sparkly. He rips off her underwear too, and she feels the fabric dig into her legs before giving way. Her dress is tossed over her head, but she doesn't mind that. Maybe it will be easier to forget if she doesn't see anything. _

"_Shut up," He grunts, and Quinn screams silently again, feeling it go in. She wants to cry and scream, and hit him hard, but she doesn't. She feels him pumping in and out, and she closes her eyes so tight she can see stars. She tries to ignore the pain, but its there, and it hurts. She balls her fists, and her nails dig into her palms, but anything hurts less than theses punishments._

_She feels him put force into it, and he presses on her back hard. She wants to scream and cry for Mother, and beg her to help. It wouldn't be useful though. She's afraid, what if she starts bleeding again. Last time, she got an infection and had to take medicine. The doctors called it something really long, and it was unusual in someone her age. Then they moved again. She didn't want that again._

_She feels him pull out hastily and go up the stairs. She opens her eyes, but the stars are still there. She waits for them to disappear, before sitting up. She feels a warmth where she's sitting, and when she stands, she feels it trailing down her legs. Quinn grabs her stockings and drops them in the liquid, looking as the white fabric turns crimson in the moonlight. _

"_Vampires aren't supposed to bleed though." Quinn whispers, unsure of how to get the bleeding to stomach. She walks with pain over to the table, each step making the wounds larger. She climbs onto the table and lies facedown on it. The hunger pains have gone, or maybe she just doesn't notice them because this hurts so much. _

"_Cinderella, I learned a new word today at school. It was really bad though, and I can't say it in class." Quinn wraps the Christmas tree skirt around her tightly, unsure if she's still bleeding heavily. "But I can say it to you and I will."_

_The hardness of the table isn't a good pillow, but she doesn't care. She's in so much pain and she's so tired. Maybe when she turns 10, it'll all stop. Maybe she'll be good then, but she still has to wait a year. She doesn't want to wait, she wants to run. She wants to see Father in prison so she can laugh at him._

_Quinn smiles a little at the thought. Father could be chained like the circus elephants in Dumbo, and Quinn could be like Julius Caesar on his throne. She'll laugh at Father and order for him to be hurt too, and then she'll throw peanuts at him. In the end, she'll do thumbs down, like in a fight in Roman times, and he'll get killed. Then she would be free. _

"_Before I tell you that word, Cinderella, do you know what it's like to be free?" Quinn whispers, hugging the doll. "Is it nice? Is there a place you can go, or things you're given when you're free? How much does it cost to be free? I want to pay it myself, because if Father lets me be free, he'll still hurt me. He'll say, 'I'm paying, so I can do what I want'."_

_Quinn sighs, trying to be calm and such. She thinks the bleeding is slowing down, but she's not sure. She just doesn't want to get sick again. "Anyways, one day, I'll be free and Father won't hurt me again." Quinn giggles at the bad word she learned. "Cinderella, Father's a fucking asshole."_

-.-

"So let me see," Rachel looked at the list of movies on the napkin in front of her, and Quinn sipped the now lukewarm coffee. "When you come over to my house this weekend, we will be watching most of the Disney movies, Tarzan, the Lion King and the Aristocats for sure. We will also be watching the Godfather 1 and 2, A Star is Born, Breakfast at Tiffany's, The Way We Were, and Star Wars all episodes."

"You forgot the Birdcage," Quinn grabbed the napkin and pen and scribbled it down. "Robin Williams and Nathan Lane are hilarious. I know half the dialogue." Quinn flashed Rachel a toothy grin when the brunette laughed.

"Really? Show me something?" Rachel smiled, still giggling as Quinn slid out of the booth and begins a dance routine.

"You do... Fosse Fosses Fosse, you do Martha Graham Martha Graham Martha Graham!" Quinn laughed as Rachel held her stomach with giggles "Or Twyla, Twyla Twyla! Or Michael Kidd, Michael Kidd, Michael Kidd, Michael Kidd! Or Madonna Madonna Madonna! But you keep it all inside." Quinn brushed back her hair, beaming at Rachel who's laughing hard in the booth. She bowed slightly and looked around the coffee shop as the remaining patrons started clapping.

"That was amazing!" Rachel finally got out, wiping away tears from the laughter. "You should be an actress."

"Yes, me, the moody bitchy actress demanding the best." Quinn grinned, looking at the empty plates and spilled coffee all over the table. The clock on the wall read 7:30, and Quinn wasn't surprised they had spent the hours talking about movies, Disney, and Barbra Streisand. The midget adored Streisand.

"Well, you're a good dancer from what I just saw." Rachel drank the last of her coffee, and looked up at the clock on the wall. "My goodness, look at the time. I didn't even tell my dads I was going out this afternoon. They'll be worried sick if they're home before I am."

"Alright, driving you home now Ms. Berry? Will I be invited inside?" Quinn slid out of the booth, grabbing the trash and waiting for Rachel to follow.

"I don't do that on a first date Ms Fabray, but you might get a little treat for such a wonderful evening." Rachel waited for Quinn to toss out the trash, the blonde finally taking her hand.

"Damn, I was hoping I could get a more than a little treat," Quinn smiled impishly, and Rachel blushed. She was really hoping that she the treat meant a kiss, because Quinn really didn't know how to bring it up without being awkward.

"Not tonight." Rachel pushed open the door, and looked out at the sunset. The clouds had broken up a bit, and it was cool outside. "Gorgeous evening isn't it?"

"Beautiful," Quinn agreed with Rachel at the palette of pinks and purples across the sky. She opened the door to the car, and let go of Rachel's hand so the brunette could get in. She knew what she wanted to say, but it would sound like something out of cheesy romantic comedy.

"You are going to give me your number so I won't be lonely tonight, correct?" Rachel handed Quinn her phone, and waited as the blonde typed in her number. She blushed as Quinn handed it back, smiling as she read the name. "Nice title."

"I think it suits me well," Quinn smirked, looking back as she pulled out of the spot and back onto the main roads. At least they missed rush hour.

"Well, you are my 'super awesome girlfriend'," Rachel took Quinn's phone from the blonde's outstretched hand, and quickly programmed her number. It was almost empty of contacts, except for home, school, and one other. "I don't mean to pry, but who's Captain Picard?"

Quinn laughed, "This guy I met at school in Iowa. He was in college, but coming back for extra credits. Sam something, on his phone I'm Princess Leia. He's a Trekkie, I'm more Star Wars."

"Interesting," Rachel handed the phone back to Quinn, "Well, I'm sure you'll be able to tell who I am."

"What, you're not going to tell me now? That's no fun," Quinn faked a pout while Rachel smiled, and shoved her playfully. "You're going to tell me how to get to your house right?"

"No I just expected you to know," Rachel said sarcastically, shaking her head, "At the next set of lights, turn right."

"Well, when you look at you phone, you'll see it. No peeking before I'm at home though." Rachel smiled, taking Quinn's hand, and turning on the radio to be blasted with loud music. "Oh good lord!

Quinn laughed in the driver's seat, spinning down the volume dial. "It's Rise Against, you don't like it?" She looked at Rachel, who had a hand at her chest.

"Its fine, it's just loud," Rachel huffed. Quinn smiled at her, and kissed her hand. What was she supposed to say to that? Rachel felt the redness return at her cheeks. Whenever Quinn was romantic, they seemed to turn into a bright red.

"Sorry for scaring you Princess." Quinn grinned, kissing Rachel's hand. Chivalry was something she hoped to keep alive in this relationship, the brunette really only deserved the best. "Now where to?" Quinn tried to keep her jaw up as they turned into a really ritzy part of town. This was where you went if you had money.

"Turn left and then left again. We live in the 'poorer' area of this neighborhood. It's only because of the neighbors. They really are some of the nicest people I've met." Rachel said, seeing the slight shock on Quinn's face.

"Yeah, no offense, but it seems you've only encountered bitches and trolls in school. Your perceptions of nice are different, but that goes for me too." Quinn said, turning at the stop sign. She thanked her lucky stars that her parents lived at the opposite end of this community; she didn't want any chance that she might run into them.

"Well, I suppose that's true." Rachel said, keeping an eye out for her house. Quinn looked a little nervous, the most emotion she could get out of the blonde now. "Right here's my house, number 28."

Quinn pulled into the driveway, upset that the evening was over, and she couldn't be with Rachel until school tomorrow. It was horrible, especially with her teachers and classmates. Quinn got out of the car, slid across the hood again, chilled at the drop in temperature, and opened Rachel's door. "Alright Princess, can I get my treat now?"

Rachel stepped out into the chilly air, and nodded at Quinn. She put one hand on the blonde's face, and drew her in, meeting Quinn's lips in a breathy kiss. The blonde had the taste of vanilla and strawberry still lingering on her, and Rachel felt a spark between them, something she had never felt before. This was different, this was perfect.

Quinn's heart fluttered as Rachel pressed their lips together, and she desperately wanted to taste more of the brunette. God, this was so different, from anything she had ever experienced. Rachel's smell, her touch, and her taste; Quinn was going absolutely wild at Rachel's taste. She put her hands on Rachel's cheeks and smiled as she kissed her harder. This was what she wanted, something romantic, something classy. This had to be perfection.

Finally pulling away, Rachel smiled. She rested her forehead on Quinn's chin, and felt the coolness of the snake bites against her skin. She was kicking herself for not being able to take Quinn inside and fuck her hard, but she had to wait.

Quinn hated herself too. She was so fucked up and twisted and scarred, she could probably never as close as she wanted to with Rachel without using force. She could never bring herself to do that to the brunette, not with everything she had been through. She hugged Rachel tightly, feeling the warmth from the tiny girl inside her arms, and she wanted to cry with happiness. She knew she had to let go, and she felt her insides being ripped as she let go of the brunette.

"Can you pick me up tomorrow morning" Rachel looked up into Quinn's beautiful eyes, and smiled.

"Of course, what time?" Quinn replied, breathlessly. She wanted to say how she loved Rachel, but love was a powerful word. She had no idea how Rachel would react, and she really didn't want to fuck up now.

"I honestly don't care. Just come over." Rachel kissed her quickly again, before pulling away, knowing her fathers would be worried sick. She had seen the garage lights on, meaning they just got home, and lingering out here would only make them wonder.

"I'll be here Princess." Quinn couldn't stop smiling, biting her lip nervously as she watched Rachel walk up the steps. She felt the coldness in the space that the brunette once occupied, and she wanted to run up and grab Rachel, making her promise not to run away.

"Bye Quinn," Rachel waved, her bag slung over her shoulder, and Quinn realized she was still wearing the Black Sabbath shirt. She raised a hand in goodbye.

"Bye Rachel, see you tomorrow." Quinn wanted to jump up and down with excitement, and she got back into the car, watching as Rachel disappeared into the house. She pulled out of the driveway, and drove back onto the road that led to her parent's house.

Tomorrow morning she'd be with Rachel again, she only had to wait roughly twelve hours. School of course would get in the way, but she didn't care. She sat beside Rachel in all her classes, with the exception of woodshop. The entire time she would be imagining how Rachel would accept her, and not find her a disgusting freak.

She almost couldn't remember where she was driving to, but then she did and she grimaced. She finally saw the building, and pulled into the driveway, setting the car in park. Before she got out she grabbed her phone and flipped open the contacts.

_Your Beautiful Princess, _Quinn grinned like a little kid when she saw the name, and felt her heart jump. Rachel, her princess. Quinn didn't remember a time where she had been so happy. She calmed herself down before getting out of the car and grabbing her bag. She was "home".


	4. Home Is Where The Heart Is

**OMG! THE REVIEWS! I'm a little happy right now. They. Are. Awesome. ****Thank you all for the reviews! Much appreciated! **  


**To everyone who favourited, followed and reviewed this story, many thanks! I love to hear feedback, and I'm a scatterbrain, so I'm sorry if i don't answer questions or don't notice things. And to everyone who asked questions in their reviews, you'll learn everything as the story progresses. So if things are vague now, they shall be explained in further chapters.  
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**Forgot a warning before, here it is - WARNING! child abuse, rape, incest, molestation. Don't like it, don't read it.  
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**And... about the future of this fic... no spoilers, what fun would that be? Suspense is the best part.  
**

**I've rambled, alright. Sorry for mixing up words and spelling mistakes.  
Enjoy!**

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Quinn slammed the car door, wishing it was later in the night. She could then just run inside, lock the door and sleep until school. She'd lock the door of course, but that wasn't a guarantee that he'd stay away.

She walked into the space between the houses and towards the door to the basement. She slid the key out from her shoe, and unlocked the door. It swung open on its rusty hinges and Quinn made another mental note to oil them on the weekend.

The stairway was dark, and Quinn grippe the banister as she went downstairs. She flicked on the light switch, and blinked a few times, adjusting to the hazy light. She hadn't cleaned the room in a few days, and all the chips were lying open on the table. The actual room itself was clean, tiled floors and wooden paneled walls, like it had been forgotten by the 70's. The owners were friends of her fathers.

She dumped her bag on the couch, and started tugging off her shirt. The dresser shoved against one wall was full of clothes, but she couldn't tell which were clean. Not that it mattered; she'd always douse herself in perfume before going out, just in case. Quinn tugged off the tights, tossing them into the laundry bag. With today's heat, there was no way she could wear them again.

She tugged off the pink briefs, and slid into a pair of boxers, breathing with relief. She was a little sore from spending the day tucked and experiencing the erection in the café. Grabbing a white tank, she hastily put it on as she made her way to the bathroom. She switched on the light, and blinked a few times. The bathroom was all white tiles, and it was giving her a headache from the brightness.

He couldn't come tonight. She didn't want him to, and she wasn't going to take it tonight. There were nights where she could fight him off, but then he'd come back harder. She sat slumped on the toilet lid while she brushed her teeth, feeling a little defeated. She had certainly come down from the high that Rachel had given her. It didn't help that the bathroom didn't have a door, just a curtain of beads. She couldn't hide anywhere.

Quinn spat into the sink and rinsed out her mouth. She relieved herself after washing her face, and scrubbed her hands. The apartment had gotten colder, and Quinn heard a car pull out of the driveway. Fuck, that meant her father was on his way. She grabbed the broom, and made her way up the stairs, jamming the wooden handle against the door. She took the only chair in the apartment, and pressed it up against the metal door as well. The last thing she wanted was to see him tonight. She wasn't going to go down without a fight.

Her phone buzzed, but Quinn let it ring. She didn't want to talk to Rachel now, not until she was sure the bastard was kept out of here. She crawled onto her couch, and turned on the fuzzy television, flipping channels. The colour receptor had broken on her first night here, so everything was black and white. She clasped her hands together in a fist, ready to throw the first punch when he showed up.

She should've tried to find her own place to rent, but she was a teenager with no job and no cash. How the hell could she get a job when she switched states every few months? No one else was willing to take her. She didn't even know that these people knew her father until she came back one night and her father was having a smoke on the porch.

The lock clicked on the door, and Quinn froze. It took her a second to gather her thoughts and she grabbed the brick of a science textbook from her bag. "Not tonight you prick," She muttered, leaning on the wall separating the stairwell from the stove. She put on hand on the stove, and finds it warm. Who the hell comes down here?

"Quinn Fabray you unlock this goddamn door," She heard her father yell, and she laughs. The broom was actually working. When the hell did that strategy ever work outside of the movies? She didn't give a shit, it was working and she surely wasn't complaining.

"Make me!" She screamed back, laughing like an idiot. She must've lost her mind now, because she never tried to be this bold. It was just something she didn't do with her father. Fuck, she forgot the tazer in the car. Damn, otherwise this could've been a Fabray light show; she'd shock the old man so many times he would become a walking lamp.

Did he just break the goddamn door? Quinn heard metal squeaking, and splintering of wood, and she grabbed the textbook so tightly her knuckles turn white. He was not going to fuck her tonight; she'd make sure of that. She jumped as the chair crashed onto the landing in front of her. Yeah, he's here and he's pissed off; really, truly pissed off. She's fucked.

"You insolent brat! You still haven't learned have you?" He screamed, a low guttural scream. Quinn waited as he came down the stairs, and she held the textbook over her head, ready to strike. His shadow appeared before he did, and she waited for the first glimpse of him to appear before her. This was not going to be like every other fucking night.

Swinging down the textbook towards his head, Quinn gasped as he grabbed her wrists before it hit the target. Russell lifted her into the air, one of his meat hooks pressing Quinn's wrists together. She let go of the book, hearing it crash to the floor, and with his other hand, he grabbed her neck tightly. She really would need concealer tomorrow, just to hide the bruises.

"You are going to listen to me," He hissed, but Quinn refused to nod in agreement. She spat on his face, and held back a smile as he was caught off-guard. The hand on her neck disappears, but comes back with a knife. Quinn grits her teeth as he makes a cut on her cheek. He was not going to see her in pain. Not this time.

"Fuck you," she breathed out, hearing to clink as the metal hits the tile. It echoed in the tiny apartment and Quinn knew better than to flail her legs now. It would waste her energy, and it would make him smile, seeing her as the victim. She would not sit down and play victim tonight. Why did she have to keep reassuring herself then?

Her head hit the wall as Russell's punch landed its target. She shook off the stars, and felt blood pool in her mouth. He still had a tight grip on her wrists, pinning them above her head, but she wasn't going to give up this easily. "You bastard," Quinn spit out, spraying the blood onto his white shirt. Try getting rid of those stains.

"You really think you're going to get away?" He leaned in, centimeters from her face, and flecks of saliva hit Quinn's face. She quickly brought up her knee, smirking as it hit perfectly between her father's legs. He let go of her wrists for a spilt second, and Quinn pulled them out from under his hands. See, she wasn't an idiot. She knew his weak spots.

"Yes, I actually do," She muttered, and ran around her father, trying to get up the stairs. This was the easy part, running away. She felt him grab on her ankle, and tug, and she slammed face first onto the tiles steps. Her hands stung as they landed on the corner of the steps, and her ribs shook as they collide with edges as well. She felt like the wind had been knocked out of her, like she couldn't breathe.

"Then you're dumber than you look," Russell exhaled, clearly fighting the pain that Quinn caused. He tugged her down the steps. Dammit, this ceramic hurt. After this, she was definitely finding a carpet. Her chin grazed the edge of each step, and she tried leaning her head back. How had she survived this every damn night before?

"I. Am. Not. Stupid." She shouted, putting all her force into her kicks, feeling Russell grab her other leg and pinning it down. She felt him begin to turn her over, and she felt her back now hit against the corners of the steps. She curved her spine, making sure not to hit the back of her head, and sucked in her breath as the bone slammed against ceramic. All she could think of was the bruises that would make sitting down tomorrow a living hell.

"Of course you are," He said, tugging her towards the couch, and forcing her onto it. He didn't let go of her legs once, and Quinn panted, trying to catch her breath. Why? Why does he keep winning? Just once, she'd love to see her father tied up and beaten, just once. "You're also selfish, greedy, and spoiled."

"Fuck you!" She screamed, trying to spin back onto her back, but he grabbed her arms and twisted them up high behind her back. She felt the pain shoot through her shoulders and elbows, and was positive something would dislodge. If she did end up breaking something, he'd run. Why break something already broken? She held in a scream, not wanting to give her father the satisfaction of causing her pain. He tugged again, and Quinn felt something in her shoulder want to pop out of its socket.

"What was that?" He said coyly, and he tugged her arms higher, causing her spine to curve and her head to twist back. Quinn could barely hold it in any more, and she let out a high pitched scream, feeling her limbs drop back to their original positions. She felt them being bound, and she thrashed again.

Russell grabbed the nearest lamp, and slammed in hard on the back of Quinn's skull. The sound of metal against bone echoed inside Quinn's head, and she stopped resisting, trying to stop the shooting, sporadic pain that was bouncing around her skull. She couldn't win. Every fucking time she tries running, he finds her; even if she's two towns over. Her vision went blurry, seeing double everything. She breathed heavily, and felt him tug off her boxers.

"I said, fuck you," Quinn whispered, gritting her teeth as she feels his hardened member penetrate her. It had stopped bleeding a long time ago, and she wished it would start again. He would still run if he saw blood. She struggled to keep her eyes open, her head was heavy and dizzy, and there was still so much pain in her backside. She never looked at her back anymore, all she saw were crisscrossed pink lines.

Again, the lamp was brought down on her head, and she gasps, spitting out the blood that had pooled from the punch. He began pushing it in harder, with more force, and pressed one hand against her back. Quinn wanted to plug her ears, his grunting could only mean one thing, and she really didn't want that to happen. He didn't now how hard it was to get clean after this ordeal.

He kept going, harder and faster, and Quinn wanted to punch him, as hard as she could. She really wanted to see his blood staining the furniture for once. She felt the warm substance inside her, and she let out a whimper, a small one, but a whimper nonetheless. She hated when he ejaculated inside her; she felt so dirty, so sick.

He flipped her over, and Quinn weakly parted her lips, expecting the worst now. Her head was spinning, and she could feel a small cut on the base of her neck, blood trickling down. She had no more fight left in her, and she just wanted this to be over so she could shower. So she could try to get clean. Fuck, just let this end.

Quinn's eyes fluttered open as she felt him take her penis and fondle it. Fuck no, this isn't happening, he never did this. She knew what he was trying to do, but she had no idea why. She closed her eyes again, trying to picture the most grotesque scenes in her head; anything to stop her from getting the erection he was going for.

She tried thinking of scenes from the Exorcist, the Grudge, that Slender game she had tried a few weeks ago. It wasn't working, and she didn't know how fucked up this would make her. To say that she hadn't masturbated would be a lie, but this was the first time someone else was touching her, and it had to be him. Quinn closed her eyes tightly, and tried to think of Rachel at least, but that made her feel dirty. She just met the girl, how could she picture fucking her already. And Rachel's hands were much more feminine and delicate than her father's meat hooks.

Her head was spinning, and her breath was becoming broken. She wanted to reach out and slam her father, hard, right on the crown of his head. She felt the rope digging into her wrists, and her father was sitting on her legs to the point where she couldn't feel them. She gathered all her remaining strength, and quickly shot up, feeling Russell's head smack against her own. That stunned him, but Quinn knew she would vomit. All the hits tonight had probably given her a minor concussion.

She felt a hand come to her neck and squeeze tightly. She thought her eyeballs were about to pop out of her head, and she couldn't breath. She couldn't claw at his hand, and the rope was certainly cutting off circulation. He hadn't been here in almost a week because of a "business trip"; she should've expected something horrible.

"What the fuck was that?" He spits on her face, and Quinn wants to wipe it away. She feels him tighten his grip on her penis, and she wants to cry in pain. This should not feel good, so why was she still getting an erection? She pressed her lips in a thin line, refusing to answer her father's question. He wasn't getting any satisfaction tonight, no matter how much it hurt.

Seeing there's not going to be an answer, Russell dropped her, and Quinn felt the wooden armrest smack against her skull. She was ready to vomit from dizziness, and she wanted to pass out from the pain. Why couldn't she just pass out? He would either leave, or kill her, and she was ready to accept either right about now.

"Please, not this…" Quinn whispered weakly, but she couldn't move. "Please… anything but this…" She trailed off as she felt the stirring inside her. Why? Why did it have to be this?

"You're going to be so fucked up, no one will ever touch you," Quinn looked at Father to see him smirked deviously. Of course he wanted this to happen, he wanted her to be his sex slave until he died. She would be too fucked up to ever be able to consummate with someone else, not after everything she went through.

"You're wrong," She whispered, and received a slap pain tingled across her cheek. She felt her breath hitching as his hand began stroking her penis, and she wanted to cry. This wasn't supposed to happen, not like this. It was her father, her _father. _This wasn't just sick and wrong, she was pretty sure it was illegal.

"And you're an idiot," He hissed, and Quinn felt the tears brim. She let out a gasp as she ejaculated, and she felt the tears flow freely. He had taken everything from her, everything. This was her first time being touched by someone else, and it had to be him, of all people. She was fucked.

Quinn felt so dirty, knowing she had just ejaculated to her father. He grabbed her neck and she opened her eyes to look at him. He knew what he had done, and he was smug. Of course he would be happy about it. She bit on her lip to keep from sobbing, and she hammered her eyes shut to stop the tears from flowing.

"You're all mine, do you understand. No one else can ever take you because you'll always remember this." He hissed, and Quinn wanted him to leave her alone. So she could break down in peace. So she could go into the bathroom and break down, hating herself for just a little while. "How can you ever fuck someone else, all you'll be able to think of is me."

That did it. Quinn leaned over the side of the couch and puked, right onto the tile floors. Great, that would have to get cleaned up now, and chances were that she would step in it after he left. God, the way he said that… she felt so dirty and sick and twisted. The words spun around her head and in front of her eyes; she had never felt so… disgusting.

He tossed her over, and grabbed the knife, cutting the rope off of her wrists. Quinn didn't move, she didn't want to move. Not until he left. He went into the bathroom, and she heard the faucet run. He was cleaning off his hand, the only part he thought that he had contaminated during this. He never wiped himself after he had done this to her.

She heard him go up the steps, and the door slammed. The car engine outside started up, and it trailed off into the night. She finally broke down, feeling an immense pressure build inside her head. Everything hurt, every goddamn thing, and she felt so dirty. No matter how long she showered, how much she cleaned herself, she would never get rid of the filth inside her.

She shakily stood up, and looked on the couch. There were splatters of semen covering the cushions and her boxers were covered in it. She slid them off as well, and tossed them into the laundry bag. Her head was pounding and she could feel dried blood smeared all along her face. This wasn't supposed to happen. It wasn't. So why did keep happening; over and over again?

Taking tiny steps towards the bathroom, she feels the tears streaming down her cheeks. She could walk better than usual, because it took him such a short time to ejaculate. She opened the light, and pulled back the shower curtains. The shower started up, and Quinn pulled off her tank top and bra, tossing them onto the toilet lid. At least here, she could become numb, empty her head, try to make this all disappear into her subconscious

Warm water crashed over her, plastering her blond hair onto her neck and scalp. The water poured over her face, making her vision blur. The steam was drawing the curtains closer towards her, and she tossed them away. She didn't want anything touching her in here. She didn't want anyone touching her usually, except that kiss with Rachel was so amazing. Fuck, she couldn't even be normal for Rachel. She slammed her fists against the tiled wall, and cried harder. She didn't care her hands had throbbing pain now, she kept slamming against the tiles until she noticed they were turning purple.

Quinn pressed the flat of her hands against her closed eyes, waiting to see the stars again. She was gasping for breath in between sobs, trying to stop, but doing it unsuccessfully. How could she open up to Rachel? If her father insisted on this new routine, there was no way that she would be able to have a healthy relationship with Rachel. She would never let the brunette touch her.

She plugged the drain, and felt the warm water begin to pool at her feet. She stood in the stream of water, waiting for her mind to numb so she could shove this entire night into the back of her subconscious; so she could repress it and move on. She felt the tears going down her cheeks, but they were getting mixed with the water and she truly couldn't feel much.

She wasn't an idiot, and she knew actually finishing school would get her that much further in the world. She had to finish her education if she truly wanted to get away from that sick bastard. Did that mean putting up with this shit for another 2 years?

All this would've been so much easier if she had just been born a boy. She had the double x chromosomes, she actually had the goddamn uterus, but she also had male genitals, making this situation such much worse. She looked down at herself, her hair still clinging to her neck. She brushed it back and ran hands over both sides of her head; across the long blonde hair and closely cropped pixie cut.

She had breasts, round and firm, but between her legs she had the still erect, fully functioning penis. If she really, truly thought about it, she didn't hate herself; she hated the things that her father had done to her. However, in the shower was the only time she could think rationally, for a short amount of time. That rational thought appeared between the overwhelming anger and dirtiness, and mind-numbing process. This wasn't going away though, this fucking night wasn't disappearing.

The bath water was warm, and Quinn slid into it, pulling her legs up to her chest and trying to stop crying. Every time she closed her eyes, she felt it. The stroking touch, the rubbing. She tried to think of Rachel, but the brunette would disappear from her thoughts, replaced by her father's sinister grin. The water poured over head, she had tossed the bar of soap in the bath, but she felt so dirty, so vile. She didn't want to look at herself anymore, she didn't want to see herself again, and she wished she could say she would be fine if she never woke up again.

But Quinn Fabray was not a quitter. She was kicked out of a lot of goddamn things, but she never quit. Maybe it was the mental conditioning. Maybe she never wanted to quit because she had never been taught how to quit. No matter what, she was not just going to end her life. She would beat her father to a pulp and spend the rest of her life in prison, serving for murder; but she wasn't going to kill herself.

Quinn wiped the water away from her eyes, smearing the black eyeliner around her face even more. She would cling to Rachel as best she could, but she knew she had to give the brunette space. She now actually had living, breathing proof that things could improve. Before, she had gone on pure hope, but the stupid thing that barely worked.

Shutting off the shower and draining the tub, Quinn climbed out, covering herself with the only towel in the apartment. She went into the main room, and looked at the couch, with the large white stain. Without thinking, she flipped the cushion over, making the mark disappear.

She sat on the couch, and realized the TV was on the entire time. She hadn't noticed, her father's body had blocked the small screen, and it was on mute. She carefully picked up the remote control, and flipped channels. This night was just like any other; one that would undoubtedly fuck her up even more.

-.-

Rachel smiled, shutting the door quietly. Quinn had to be the most romantic person she had ever met, and this day had proved that life could be like the movies. She could see the light on in the kitchen, and she assumed her dads were home, most likely wondering why she was home so late.

Kicking off her shoes, Rachel tried to hide the goofy smile on her face as she walked into the kitchen to see her fathers sitting at the table with a late night dinner. She saw them look at her with raised eyebrows, and she held in a giggle. "Hi Dad, Hi Daddy," She smiled, opening the fridge and getting some orange juice.

"Hi sweetie," Leroy kissed Rachel, and Hiram coughed slightly. "Where were you?"

"I was out with a friend" Rachel said innocently, watching as her fathers looked at her with suspicion. She rarely went out with friends; she barely had any to go out with. This night was different, Quinn was different, Quinn was wonderful. She smiled again, but didn't realize it until her Daddy commented.

"You seem to be smiling quite a bit. This wasn't more than just going out with a friend?" Hiram sipped his coffee and watched Rachel blush. She couldn't hide her emotions well, and was a terrible liar.

"Well, it was just me and this new girl Quinn. We went out for coffee, finished homework and made a movie list." Rachel blurted out, slipping in the lie about homework quite easily. School was such an easy thing to fib about.

"Sounds like a date to me," Leroy nudged Rachel, and she turned a brighter shade of red.

"It was not a date." Rachel smiled into her water, recalling how Quinn marched to the front of science class to declare it a date. "It was just a coffee… outing." Rachel realized she was about to agree with her Dad, but she knew Quinn had to take the first steps with everything they did. Surprising the blonde with a meet and greet with her fathers might not be a good idea.

"Uh-huh, just a coffee outing." Hiram got up and put his cup in the dishwasher, kissing Rachel on her forehead. "Just tell us you'll be late next time, all right?"

"Ok." Rachel nods, "I'm just going to finish this and go to my room. I think I'm just going to watch some TV for the rest of the night."

Her dads nodded, and looked at each other before leaving to watch their programs. Rachel rolled her eyes and blushed. Of course they realized it was a date. The two could read her like a book.

Whatever, Rachel really didn't care now. She was too happy. First of all, someone had actually paid attention to her today, and not in a frozen drink sort of way. Second, she was also being protected by that someone. Third, they had gone on an impromptu date, just like the movies. She was fit to burst with happiness and she was sure at some point she would faint, but she didn't care.

She grabbed her bag from beside the door and rushed up the stairs to her room. Was it even normal to feel this happy after a first date? She had no idea. Maybe this was coupled with the excitement that she had found someone who was willing to talk to her; maybe she was just waiting for the excitement to die down and then the relationship would stop.

Great, that lowered her mood. Rachel thought about this possibility. Perhaps she was so thrilled about this possible relationship because she had never been in a proper one before. This was her first time dating a female as well. Maybe this was like a new toy, all shiny and glamorous, different and such. After you get used to it, it's not so special anymore. She really didn't want that to happen with Quinn.

She sat on her bed, picking up the remote and flipping channels. If she wasn't so deep in thought about this issue, she would've gone down to get a snack. She really didn't want to get to a point where they would be bored with each other, and she definitely wanted spontaneity from Quinn.

What would the sex be like? The question entered Rachel's mind and she brushed it off, feeling her cheeks heat up at the thought. She really couldn't see Quinn being the aggressive type like Finn was trying to be; she seemed like such a sweetheart. Rachel blushed again as she thought about that. Wasn't she moving a little fast though? No, this was just thoughts, it's not as though she would act on it tomorrow. She needed to get to know Quinn better before she thought about consummating anything.

However, maybe she just needed a little reassurance. She really didn't want to seem clingy, not in the least, but she also didn't want to lose Quinn.

Just once; one call tonight, and then she wouldn't call again. Just to say goodnight. Was that being clingy? She really didn't want that. Oh well, here goes nothing. Rachel dialed Quinn's number, and waited. Voice mail answered. Quickly hanging up, Rachel shut off her phone. There was no reason to keep it on, no one else would call.

She looked up at the TV, flipping channels, still bored. It wasn't even 9 o clock yet, but she was tired. She must've exhausted all her energy today, and she was definitely coming down from the caffeine buzz. Everything was finished in class, and she really didn't feel like staying up too late tonight. Tomorrow she'd have to wake up a half hour earlier as well; she had to burn off the cheesecake. She hadn't used her elliptical all summer, because she had been on vacation for most of it, and the rest of the time was naptime.

Rachel finally got out of bed after another hour of mind numbing television and her mind again wandered back to the sexy blonde. She was becoming clingy, but she wasn't acting on it. Was that still being clingy? For the first time in her life, Rachel felt like a complete idiot. She had no idea what she was getting into, or how to do it properly.

Changing into her nightgown and brushing her teeth, her mind was spinning with possibilities of what could happen. She spat into the sink, and thought about why Quinn was so jumpy. What happened to the blonde to make her so scared sometimes? How would that affect whatever dynamic they had? What was wrong with Quinn?

Rachel sat on her bed, and shut out the lights, pulling a pillow towards her in a hug. Whatever was getting to Quinn, Rachel wanted to help. She didn't want to just watch as the blonde had to live with her demons. She wanted to be able to help Quinn, with whatever she needed to heal.

God, she was becoming so clingy…

-.-

_Quinn is running. She's just jumping around the park like a monkey, she's glad her parents aren't around. It rained about 10 minutes ago, and she ran outside when it stopped. Mother didn't care, she never does. It's so weird. _

_Quinn jumps onto the slide, and goes down it standing, like she's surfing. She's muddy because of the sand, and her skirt is covered in it. She had grabbed a small boombox before running outside to the park and it was now playing Thriller. Quinn loves this song, and she dances around the swing set, singing along to the words. _

_Snapping her fingers and dancing to the rhythm, Quinn climbs to the top of the pointed roof above the slide, and pretends like she's Queen of Everyone. It's so much fun being outside by herself, especially because the cuts on her back have healed. She stands, and balances on the plastic roof, dancing around and singing loudly. The April wind was so nice, and it smelled of rain and wet grass. _

_She doesn't care if she gets dirty; Father always tells her she is. That she's sick and stupid. She personally doesn't believe him. She doesn't have a fever, or a runny nose. Besides, how can she be stupid? She knows big words, like personally, and favourable. Plus, she can name every country in the world if she was given a map. She liked learning, so she couldn't be stupid. _

_Quinn laughs. Father is the stupid one because he thinks she is. She can't wait to start preschool next year. She's three, and she can't wait to make friends. Every time she goes out with her parents, and she starts talking to someone, Father always pulls her away and gives her a lecture in the car. _

_Hmm... What song is this? Quinn slides off the roof and into the sand, feeling it cling to her knees. She runs to the boombox, and remembers she left the case at home. Oh well, it has a fun beat. It's an eighties mix, or so the case said, and she loves the beats. _

_No lyrics? No problem. Quinn hums along to the music, and jumps onto the swing set, standing on it. One girl back in Ohio she once talked to said she was going to Broadway. Quinn thought it was so cool, being paid to sing and act. Father wouldn't let her take singing lessons, he said it was a waste of money. _

"_Hey world! I'm on Broadway! Listen! I'll sing to you!" She cries out, singing along to this new song. It's Michael Jackson again, she knows all his songs. _

_Singing along to Billie Jean, and swinging high into the cloudy sky, Quinn laughs. It was the first time since they came to the new house that she's laughed like this. She was born in Maine, and she misses the cloudy beaches and forests of the white house. Illinois was ok, but she still missed her home. It was big and white and if she breathed deeply in the halls, she could smell the forest. _

_Yay! Oh she knows this song too! More Michael! This is a really good CD, where did she find it? Oh well, not her problem. _

"_Hey!" Quinn looks out onto the playground to see a kid with light hair and blue eyes. _

"_Hi!" Quinn smiles. Maybe she can make a friend. She's never had one before; her parents never let her have one. She looks down at herself. Oh well, she's a little muddy and sandy, that doesn't mean she's really dirty. _

"_That's my swing!" The boy protests. Quinn jumps off, the swing still going. The boy looks shocked, and Quinn grins. "Wow! You jumped off really high!" _

"_Thanks! I've done it a lot before. Sorry about taking your swing." Quinn says, sticking out her hand. Father always told her to shake hands when meeting people. It was polite. Father always wanted her to be polite. _

"_It's ok, that was a cool jump." The boy looks at her hand, but shakes it. "You must be fancy, to shake hands. But you don't look fancy."_

"_What do you mean?" Quinn asks. She's never been called fancy. She's been called an idiot, and spoiled, and sick but never fancy. That's Father's favourite word to describe her. She's sick, sick, sick. And dirty. That's Father's second favourite word. _

"_You're pretty." The boy says. He has to be younger than her, or crazy. She's never ever been called pretty. _

"_Thanks." She smiles. He seems nice. _

"_Do you want to go on the slide with me?" The boy pulls cars out of his pocket and hands one to her. "I got these hot wheels for my birthday. You take one. I have a big box full at home."_

"_Thanks!" She grins, looking at the shiny blue car. Blue is her favourite colour, but Father doesn't like it. That's why her room is always pink. It's her second favourite colour. "Let's go."_

_The two scurry up the steps to the swings. The boy is wearing jeans and a Toy Story jacket. Quinn has on her pink sparkly skirt and a pink hoodie. She loves her rain boots, they're rainbow coloured. Father hated that she got them._

_Quinn giggles as they go down the slide head first and on their sides and backwards once. The boy is here with his grandmother, and he shows her how to spin the wheels on the toy car really fast._

"_This is fun" He says, grinning. "I'm Tyler. Who are you?"_

"_I'm Quinn," She says, out of breath from racing to the top of the slide._

"_Isn't that a boy's name?" He asks, looking at Quinn funny. _

"_I think so, but I don't know for sure. It's because my Father thought I was a boy when I was born." Quinn shrugs. That's what he told her anyways. _

"_That's silly. You're a girl, you have girl parts." He nudges her, like it's a joke. "How did he not notice that? Mama said all babies are born naked, so he should've seen them."_

"_No I don't, and he did see them," She says, innocently. It's the truth. She doesn't have girl parts, she has boy parts, but she's a girl. She has girl DNA, that's what Mother told her. '_

"_You're funny Quinn," Tyler laughs. "Nonna, Quinn's silly." He calls to the old woman sitting on the bench. "She says she has boy parts, like me."_

_The woman calls to Tyler in a funny language and Tyler laughs, speaking back to her in that same language. Quinn stands there uncomfortable, spinning the wheels on the toy car. _

"_My Nonna says you're funny too." Tyler laughs, and Quinn nods. She'll just be funny then; the truth can be funny sometimes right? It's easier than explaining everything to him. _

"_What's a Nonna?" She asks. She doesn't know languages very well. _

"_It's Italian for Grandma. She's my grandma, but because I'm Italian, I call her my Nonna." Tyler nods his head, confirming it. "What are you?"_

"_I don't know. British maybe." Quinn shrugs. Her name is a British name. "I don't see my grandparents often. They live in Maine."_

"_That's cool. I have a cottage in Maine." Tyler smiles. They go down the slide again, still giggling. "Quinn who's that?"_

"_That's my mom," Quinn says, seeing Mother run to the park in her black heels and dress pants. Quinn likes her blouse, it's nice. _

"_Why is she running?" Tyler looks confused, and Quinn doesn't want to tell him the real reason._

"_Quinn, you get back to that house this instant." Judy stops right before the sand, crossing her arms in front of her chest, looking absolutely livid. Quinn slides the toy car into her pocket, and doesn't say anything. "Quinn Fabray, you will listen to me. Go back to the house."_

"_I have to go, Tyler. Can we be friends though?" Quinn asks, sad to leave the first friend she's had in a long time. _

"_Of course we can! Next time I come to the park, I'll wait for you to come too. Then we can play cars again." Tyler hugs her quickly and Quinn smiles. It's so nice to be hugged, she's never hugged. "Bye Quinn."_

"_Bye Tyler." Quinn grabs her boombox and shuts off the CD. This was so much fun, why can't she come here normally? Is it because she's too young? That would make sense; she once heard Father tell Mother that she was too young for something, but Quinn didn't hear what. She knew it wasn't good though, because Mother said he really shouldn't do it at all. Then Father hit Mother, and Quinn ran up the stairs before she got the belt again. _

_Judy takes Quinn's hand, and squeezes it so tightly that she can't feel it anymore. All Quinn feels is tingling, and then needles and pins. _

"_Ow, Mother, you're hurting me." Quinn says loudly, and Mother lets go. Mother's nicer than Father when it comes to her. Father would've thrown her onto the street if she told him that. _

"_Your father is coming home early, so you need to be cleaned up and ready for Sunday Mass." Mother says, taking the boombox from her and Quinn nods. _

"_Why do I have to go to church? Father says I don't belong anywhere, and that not even God loves me, so why do I have to go? It doesn't make sense to me." Quinn says, playing with the toy car in her pocket. Father always told her that. Nobody loves her, and nobody ever will, but Quinn doesn't believe him. Every Cinderella finds their prince charming, and Quinn is just waiting for hers._

_That's one thing Quinn things is different. She isn't sure if she wants a Prince Charming or a Princess Charming. She would never tell anyone about that though, the last mass was about how being a homosexual is a sin. That's another big word that Quinn knows; see, she's not stupid. It means liking another girl. She doesn't want to be a sinner, but is she really a sinner if God already doesn't love her?_

"_Because your Father would be angry if you stopped going. Do you want to get him angry with you?" Judy looks down at Quinn, who is violently shaking her head._

"_No, no, no," Quinn hates when Father is really angry with her. He once hit her with the belt on her private area, and that hurt like crazy. At least it wasn't with the buckle. He always hit her back with a buckle. "Why does Father always get so angry with me?"_

"_Quinn now isn't the time to talk about that." Judy shoves the stereo back into Quinn's arms when she sees Russell's car in the driveway. Great, now he's home too. This night just keeps getting better and better._

"_But why? I just want an answer. Is that too much to ask for?" Quinn says, seeing Father in the doorway to the house. She doesn't smile, but she doesn't frown. Father doesn't really care about her, so she really doesn't care about him. Is that bad? She doesn't care. He's always mean, and she always tries to be good. _

"_Where was she?" Father says to Mother, and Mother shakes her head. Oh no, Quinn hates it when Father hits her, but she hates seeing him hit Mother. Her mom is the only one who ever showed an interest in her.'_

"_At the park, that's why she's so dirty." Judy says, watching Russell smirk. The boombox looks like it's bigger than Quinn, and she's about to fall under the weight of it. _

"_Well she's always dirty. Aren't you, you spoiled brat?" Father turns to Quinn, and the little blonde doesn't know what to say. She doesn't want to talk back; Father always slaps her when she talks back. "You're just regular filth." _

_Quinn bites hard on her lip. She is not filth; she just took a bath last night. Father shouldn't say lies. He's laughing, but she doesn't think it's funny. She doesn't dare correct him though, that's a guaranteed 4 lashes with the belt, and those cuts still haven't healed properly. Mother tried bandaging them, but they bled through. _

"_What, a little shit like you isn't going to be polite?" Russell kicks her, and Quinn drops the stereo with a thud. She quickly gathers the cord and banged up stereo, almost crying. This was the best thing she owned, and she loved listening to music with it. Music was the best thing in the world. It didn't hate her, and it couldn't be taken away from her either. _

_Father sounds a little weird though, like all his words are one big word. Quinn can understand him, but he still sounds funny. _

"_Hello Father." Quinn mumbles, and feels the leather shoe hit her arm again. She rubs it, feeling a bruise forming. She mumbled; Father hates when she mumbles. She didn't make eye contact either. That's bad. She looks up at Father's smirking face. "Hello Father," She repeats, trying to hold back any anger she has. _

"_Get in the house," He grunts, and Quinn listens. She walks through the door and up the stairs to her room. It's painted pink, and her Cinderella doll is lying on her unmade bed. She gasps at the sight of it. Father hates when she doesn't make her bed; that means her room isn't perfect. He loves perfection. She tosses the covers over her bed, and grabs Cinderella. There, all fixed. _

_She closes her door. Father won't give punishment until after dinner and Mass. It's Sunday, he always give her punishment on Sunday. At least it's after Mass. Once, she had to sit through Mass with the awful cuts on her back. She had to keep her jacket on all through Mass because she had bled through her dress and she couldn't lean against the wooden pew without pain. _

"_Cinderella, look. I made a friend, Tyler and he gave me this car," Quinn takes the sleek blue car out of her pocket and shows it to her one and only true friend. "You need to hide it for me." _

_Quinn takes the dress off her doll and looks at the underwear and cotton undershirt the princess came with. They were good hiding spots, and she knows Father will never look there. She puts the car in Cinderella's underwear and slides back on the dress. "You have the best hiding spots. I need to keep this. His name is Tyler and he's my first friend. No one else ever played with me at a park before."_

_Quinn looks at herself in the mirror, seeing the dirt stains on her cheeks and knees and skirt. "I'm not that dirty. It's only a bit of mud. Cinderella, what does Father mean when he says I'm dirty. Just last week, I had on my new dress and I had just taken a bath, but he said I was filth. I'm not filth, I'm clean." _

-.-

Quinn rolled off the couch at 6:30 am. What time did Rachel want her at the house by? Fuck, she couldn't remember. Quinn stretched her arms, and felt a series of cracks, damn that shit hurt. She wanted to forget how Russell had tied her up the previous night, but it was still fresh in her mind.

The TV had been shut off with the sleep timer at some point, or she had rolled over on the remote control because it was a plain black screen. She didn't even know if the brunette would be awake at this ungodly hour, but she turned on her phone anyways. She would call as soon as she could talk without sounding drunk.

Trudging to the bathroom with her phone in hand, Quinn noticed how she had fallen asleep in the towel from last night. Shit, that meant the couch would smell until she dried it properly, and that thing smelled like a dog when it was wet. She threw the towel over the shower bar, and slipped on her bra.

Finally, took long enough to boot up. Quinn looked at the brick of a phone, and yawned. She dialed Rachel's number, still thinking about what had happened last night. It wasn't going away. Why wasn't it going away?

"_Hello?_"Rachel answered, sounding like she was panting. Great, Quinn had probably woken her up.

"Hey Rach. Did I wake you?" Quinn bit her lip nervously, fiddling with the black balls at the ends of the piercings.

"_No, not at all. I was up earlier than usual, just working out a little before school_" Rachel answered, and Quinn smiled softly.

"Ok, good. I thought I woke you up." Quinn began pacing around the crowded bathroom. She finally stopped in front of the mirror, scowling at the cut on her cheek. Rachel would certainly be worried about that. "What time do you want me over?"

"_Whenever you're ready. Preferably between 7 and 7:30, I have breakfast set up, and then we can go to school._" Quinn nodded, listing to Rachel rattle off everything that would be waiting for her on the Berry kitchen table.

"Do you have any bacon?" Quinn asked, feeling her cheeks turn red, and she laughed a little as she heard the shock when Rachel answered.

"_I think so, why?_" Rachel sounded stunned, it was hilarious. Quinn ran her fingers through her hair and bit her lip nervously.

"Well Princess, not all of us have the self control to not eat meat. I'm a carnivore; I need some form of meat." Quinn blurted out, trying not to sound like a demanding bitch. She exhaled when she heard Rachel laugh.

"_Of course, I expected that. Not many people I know are vegans. I was actually preparing a few breakfast sausages just in case, but if you prefer bacon I can make that_." Quinn listened to Rachel as she began searching around the apartment for a pair of jeans and top. After everything that happened yesterday, she needed a pair of baggy jeans. Tucking wasn't an option today, she needed to breathe.

"Breakfast sausages are fine. I'm just getting ready; I'll be at your place by 7:15_._" Quinn smiled as she pulled a pair of jeans out from behind the couch, and picked off a few ants. Those little suckers better not be in there, because she can't wash jeans in half an hour, and she was not going to sit through school with them biting her.

"_See you then. Bye Quinn,"_ Quinn could picture Rachel smiling into the phone, and she shook her head happily.

"Bye Princess." Quinn clicked off the phone and tossed it onto the table. Ant infested jeans would not work for a school day, and another piece of clothing was tossed into the laundry bag. She pulled open the chest of drawers and grinned at the black baggy jeans just lying there.

She slid into the pair of pants, some Nirvana t-shirt, and shoved her phone into her bag. Quinn dug around the mess of an apartment for 5 minutes, looking for the perfume bottle while brushing her teeth. To say she was disorganized was an understatement.

"School stuff, perfume, brushed teeth, combed hair," Quinn whispered to herself, grabbing the key ring and shutting the lights. She slung the Batman bag over her shoulder, rushing up the steps, holding her converse by the laces. The stairs looked like a war zone, but Quinn walked right by everything. It wasn't going to stop her now, not when she had something to look forward too.

She walked in sock feet out to the car, unlocking it and tossing the bag into the backseat. Tugging on her converse, she looked into the rearview mirror, fixing her hair a little. Revving the engine, Quinn smiled at the thought of waking her father's friends. Stupid bastards had given him a key to her apartment. She looked in the back seat to see it was clean, and rolled her eyes. She had a bag of clean clothes in the trunk, and she had dug around to find these instead. Whatever, if she changed now, she'd be late.

Quinn blasted the radio as she drove through the neighborhood. The windows were closed, so it wasn't as though anyone could hear her, and she needed a pick-me-up this morning. Rise Against was as good as any. She reached over to the glove compartment at a red light, and dumped a mess of CD's onto the passenger's seat. Bush, Rage Against the Machine, more Rise Against, all very good music. Quinn smiled, sliding the Sufferer and the Witness into the stereo.

She never thought about music this much in the morning, but she laughed at how much the album title could relate to her life. How much had she gone through, and her Mother had just sat by and watched. Quinn picked up speed slightly, still pissed about last night. Every. Goddamn. Night. Quinn slammed her fists against the steering wheel, trying to shut out everything that had happened.

Finally calming down, she turned onto Rachel's street, still feeling that anger leaving a sour taste in her mouth. She had to calm down, Rachel really didn't deserve to see her angry. She was quite a mess when she got angry, because it came in stages. Shouting, punching, sobbing; in that order.

She pulled into Rachel's driveway, and grabbed her compact from underneath the pile of CD's. The bruises on her neck looked like she had lost a boxing fight, and the cut on her cheek wasn't going anywhere anytime soon. She covered up the bruises as best she could, but she couldn't put the makeup on an open wound. Great, the brunette would get so worried about this.

The house looked too quiet for 7 on a weekday, but Quinn didn't care. She didn't exactly want to piss of Rachel's parents, but if the house was this quiet, they were probably at work. She slammed the car door, and jumped up the steps, pulling her jacket tighter around her. It was a little chilly this morning, and in the shade it was cold. Finally, real September weather.

Deciding against the doorbell, Quinn knocked on the door. She swayed on the balls of her feet, taking a sudden interest in a potted plant beside the door as she waited for it to open. Hmm... green, leafy, one dead flower, how interesting.

"Good morning," Quinn looked up to see Rachel smiling in the doorway. She looked like she already had too much caffeine in her system.

"Morning Princess and how are you?" Quinn smiled, waiting to be invited inside. Politeness, she was so sick of it. She saw Rachel's eyes widen as they landed on the long red line on her cheek. At least her mouth hadn't swelled from the punch; that probably would've given Rachel a heart attack.

"Quinn, what happened?" Rachel pulled the blonde inside, looking at the clean-cut wound on her cheek. It was fairly large as well, reaching from below her eye to just beside her mouth. "Did you get in a fight?" She shut the door and pulled Quinn closer, looking at the still open wound.

"It's nothing, I'm fine." Quinn took off her jacket, noticing the high thermostat in the Berry house. It was a gorgeous house too, at least the foyer was. Large and open, with pictures of who Quinn guessed was a young Rachel on the walls.

"You aren't fine," Rachel silently chastised herself for jumping to conclusions. This was clingy; this was something she shouldn't do. But how had Quinn managed to get that cut? "It looks painful; let me at least get you some disinfectant."

"I am fine, so stop worrying. If I was missing teeth or missing an eye, then I wouldn't be fine." Quinn held the jacket tightly, waiting for Rachel to lead her into the kitchen. She smiled at Rachel's shock. "See, I still have both eyes and all my teeth. I'm fine. Besides, it's not bleeding anymore."

Rachel shook her head, determined not to say anything. That lasted about 2 seconds. "Quinn, doesn't it hurt?"

"It's a little sore, but all cuts are like that." Quinn let go of her jacket as Rachel took it, and hung it in the closet. She smiled as the brunette took her hand, and kissed her softly. It still felt so good to do that. Kissing hadn't been wrecked yet.

"After breakfast, will you let me clean it up a little before school?" Rachel knew she was pouting a little, but she couldn't help it. Quinn was the best thing that had happened to her, and the blonde was already getting hurt.

"After breakfast please. I'm actually really hungry." Quinn followed Rachel into the huge kitchen, and her mouth watered at all the food on the table. "You eat this everyday?"

"Well, sometimes fruits, vegetables, and soy aren't substantial sometimes, so I eat plenty. It's not all that much really." Rachel smiled as Quinn hugged her. This felt so right, like they had known each other for years. She was glad she knew what Quinn liked to eat, the conversation yesterday had stemmed into many topics. "I made the meat myself, for a hungry carnivore like you. Don't you eat fruits thought?"

"I know, omnivore is a better term, but how lame does that sound." Quinn raised an eyebrow at Rachel, and grinned like a little kid as she laughed. "I mean, c'mon, saying 'I'm an omnivore, I need my meat'? Carnivore sounds cooler."

"We are having a debate about what prehistoric term is better to use about a few breakfast sausages. I doubt that cool would be the word to describe us now." Rachel laughed, seeing Quinn blush slightly.

"Yeah, you're right about that. But you agree with me right?" Quinn pulled out Rachel's chair, waiting for the brunette to sit down before she did.

"You just want to hear that you're right about this." Rachel scooped some of the fruit salad onto her plate, reaching for the toast.

"That is not true," Quinn bit into one of the sausages. For someone who didn't eat meat, Rachel could cook it pretty well. "But you agree right?"

"I agree with you, but we could both be wrong about this." Rachel bit into the toast, and smiled as Quinn thought about this.

"Majority rules. We both agree, and therefore we're both right." Quinn reached for the milk on the table, Rachel had gone to every extent to make her feel at home, and she was grateful.

"See, that type of mentality has brought down governments. Countries have been ruined because the leaders think that they're correct, even when their ideas can be absurd." Rachel looks up from her plate to see Quinn laughing. "What?"

"Nothing," Quinn grabbed the fruit salad. "I will have you know though, I love history. I could debate dictatorships all morning if you want." Quinn took a sip of the milk, and smiled. "When I was younger, I wanted to be a dictator. A queen really, but one with all the power."

"I can see you as a dictator." Rachel tried to keep a straight face as Quinn looked at her curiously. "You could be like Vlad the Impaler."

Quinn laughed, and she nodded in agreement. She had a list of people she would love to see being impaled really, but Rachel couldn't learn about the ones at the top of the list. "Well, Santana would be the first to go."


	5. Savior

**I haven't forgotten about this story and I won't. so here's the next chapter.  
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**Loved this chapter, it's a bit of everything. I'm mixing up the formula a bit, so give me some feedback. If you like the new perspective(s) or not.  
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**Thanks for all the comments and feedback on the last chapter, really appreciate it :) and just to make this clear. I have very little knowledge of the male anatomy. I know of it from Sex and the City and Hit and Miss. That's it. So sorry for any mistakes I make.  
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**Warning - Violence, child abuse/incest, rape. I don't own Glee, if I did, Faberry would be real. Sorry for any grammar/spelling mistakes.  
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**So enjoy, and feedback is much appreciated!  
**

* * *

"I can't believe we spent all morning creating a hit list. I feel like I'm in the mob." Rachel smiled as they pulled into the school parking lot. "I do agree with many of the people on it, but still…"

"Still what? It's not like we actually plan on becoming the next Bonny and Clyde" Quinn cut the engine and leaned back in the seat, yawning. "Although I have seen enough Criminal Minds to commit a flawless murder, and we'd then be rich."

"Yes, but we'd also be caught. Criminals always get caught." Rachel unbuckled and turned to face Quinn, who was half asleep on the steering wheel. "I take it you didn't get much sleep last night."

"Yeah, you don't know the half of it." Quinn sighed. She didn't know what time he left last night, it was defiantly after midnight. Today was going to be hell trying to stay awake through all the boring classes. "Not all criminals are behind bars though."

"Oh I know, you read about terrible things like that in the paper, and it makes me sick." Rachel shook her head thinking about those things.

"Look at you, all mature. Actually reading the paper instead of skipping to the comics." Quinn smiled, Rachel still couldn't stop blushing. It was so cute.

"Well, I read the comics as well. I just get caught up on some really gruesome stories." Rachel tensed slightly as Quinn opened her eyes, a small smile playing at her mouth. "What?"

"Nothing," Quinn stretched her arms back and looked at Rachel. Today she was wearing a pair of jeans and a long sleeved white shirt. She probably felt the temperature drop too. "You own a pair of jeans?"

"I found them in the back of my closet, but I have no idea where I got them from. Most likely a birthday present or something like that." Rachel leaned closer to Quinn, looking at the cut. The bright red wound popped against her pale skin, and it still looked like it hurt a great deal.

"Rach, calm down, I told you I'm fine." Quinn saw the way Rachel was looking at her, the worry all over her face. She interlocked their fingers, and squeezed Rachel's hand tightly. "You look good in those jeans too."

Rachel felt her cheeks turn hot at the compliment. It wasn't even being told she looked good, it was because Quinn was telling her that. "Thanks," She looked down at the car floor, and felt Quinn take the tip of her chin with her free hand. She gazed up, and her eyes met the blonde's laughing ones.

"I'm serious." Quinn leaned forward, and kissed Rachel softly. She could still taste the strawberries and whipped cream on Rachel's lips, and she smiled a little. God, she loved kissing the brunette; everything about her was intoxicating.

Rachel was a little surprised that Quinn was moving forward so fast, but she went along with it. Quinn had a certain taste, sweet and inviting. If the blonde kept going this fast, perhaps it wouldn't be too long until she wanted to consummate. And Rachel did make an agreement with herself to go at Quinn's pace. She couldn't be thinking of that now, no matter how good the little tastes were.

_Calm down, it's just one kiss. You're getting in over your head. _The little voice in Rachel's head did calm her a little. It was just one kiss, but Quinn was getting very into it, and Rachel certainly wasn't going to stop her just yet.

Quinn, well she was really trying not to kiss Rachel that hard, but she was enjoying herself. The brunette was giving her some sort of bravery, and she let go of Rachel's hand to put it on her cheek. God, even her skin was soft; everything about the brunette was soft. She rubbed her thumb softly across Rachel's cheek, trying to taste as much of the brunette as she could, but now it was feeling… off… She was trying too hard, being too bold, fuck, this wasn't good.

She finally pulled back, a little startled with her own bravery. She was realizing where it was coming from. Quinn pulled her hand away quickly, biting her lip with nervousness. She looked up at Rachel, and met the soft brown eyes, and her mega-watt smile.

"We should do that more often," Rachel murmured, smiling still. She stroked Quinn's cheek quickly, and drew another slight kiss from the blonde. "I like it."

"Glad to hear that Princess," Quinn smiled as Rachel's lips touched hers again, wishing it could be longer.

"We should get to class though; I don't want to be late." Rachel leaned back and grabbed her bag, as well as Quinn's batman one. "Now you're looking at me like I'm crazy."

"You're not, but honestly I just want to get the good grades and get out." Quinn pulled the keys out of the ignition and grabbed the tazer, shoving it into her jacket pocket. She got out of the car, slammed the door, and slid across her hood to open Rachel's door. Chivalry really doesn't die.

"Where do you want to go? Would you be traveling for university?" Rachel took Quinn's hand, and got out, handing the blonde her bag. Quinn slung it over her shoulder, intertwining their fingers, and looked like she was thinking hard about this.

"Probably New York. I've moved around so much, but I've never been there." Quinn huffed as they walked through the doors. She really didn't like this school, but it had to be done, and she really needed good grades to get out from under her father's rule. Quinn smirked. It would be easier to change if she hated herself, but she didn't. She was actually really proud of herself, so she didn't want to die yet.

They walked through the halls, one arm over Rachel's shoulder, and the blonde actually saw a few of the kids holding slushies of various flavours, and she snickered as they looked at her holding Rachel's hand, tossing the frozen drinks into the garbage.

"I want to get there as well. NYADA is my absolute dream." Rachel smiled, leaning her head on Quinn's shoulder. "You really are my bodyguard." She whispered, looking as the students dumped slushies into the trash cans. She could see Puck waiting around Santana's locker, and she hid a grin. The bitch had both him and Brittany wrapped around her finger, but seeing him being so obedient was funny. He had also clearly not gotten his nose set, because it had swelled.

"I told you I would be. I don't back out on my promises." Quinn leaned against the lockers as Rachel clicked hers open. She had lugged everything back to the apartment, and she really didn't want to use her locker again this year. Whenever her secret got out, as it usually did, her locker was the second thing to be ransacked.

"I didn't know that people would just freeze at the sight of you though." Rachel pulled out the English novel, and checked the schedule. "We have science second, what do you think the teacher will say about skipping detention?"

"Whatever, I really don't give a shit. I might have to talk to the principle, but that always happens. Besides, if they find out I'm carrying a tazer, I think I might be in more trouble. Detention is nothing." Quinn coolly said. She had been suspended and expelled once before, so really she didn't care anymore.

"She shouldn't chew you out in front of the class though." Rachel shut her locker, and slung the bag over her shoulder. "Honestly, one of her lectures could border on child abuse."

Quinn shook her head, smiling. "Whatever, it's probably not that bad." She had been through a hell of a lot worse that's for sure. Quinn fished through the pocket in her jeans, smiling as she felt the thin body of the Swiss army knife. She really shouldn't carry so many weapons, but she felt like she was always about to be attacked. It was like she always had someone staring right at her. She cupped the tazer in her jacket, swung her backpack around to her front, and dropped the plastic body in the front pocket.

"You haven't seen it." Rachel led Quinn towards the bathroom, still laughing about science class. She was beginning to love it when they held hands. It was like a drug, every time it stopped, she craved it.

"Isn't this where those bitches were hanging out yesterday?" Quinn pouted. She wasn't one to pout, ever, but voluntarily hanging out in a public bathroom was something she really didn't want to do.

"Yes, but I have something to give to you, and I don't want to do that in front of everyone in the school" Rachel said calmly, opening the door. She just realized what that sounded like. "Please don't make that dirty."

Thank God for baggy pants. Quinn was actually really unsure of how to react to that, and then she felt the front of her pants acting as a constraint. "All right, it's not dirty." Saying that still didn't make the bulge go down.

Quinn really didn't expect anyone in McKinley high to be stupid enough to slushy Rachel, especially now that she was around. Apparently, Santana Lopez was more of an idiot than Brittany. Quinn could see the thing playing out in slow motion; Rachel opening the door to the bathroom, Santana standing there with a hand behind her back, and the midget being covering in a strawberry slushy.

Rachel gasped; she really thought she would be lucky today. This stain would take forever to get out, she instantly got a chill, and her eyes stung from the ice. She wiped it away, but her hair was soaking with the drink.

"Aww, looking RuPaul, back in her natural element. Strawberry actually makes you look somewhat like a girl." Santana tossed the cup into the trash, and went to open the door. Oh no, Bitch does not get to act like that in front of Quinn Fabray.

The blonde grabbed Santana's ponytail, pulling her back into the bathroom, and she kicked the door shut. "You really have to get off that pedestal you're on." Quinn hissed, slamming the Latina against the wall. She grabbed the collar of the uniform, hoisting Santana a foot off the ground. "Or I'll be the one to knock it down, brick by brick."

It was enjoyable to see Santana squirm like that. Damn, she must be scared as hell now, but she wasn't showing it. Quinn took the knife out of her pocket, and switched open the blade, seeing Santana's eyes get bigger when she pressed the metal to her tan skin. "You do that again, I'll hurt you, and I'll make it look like a fucking accident." Quinn hissed, laying the knife flat against Santana's cheek.

"Do you understand me?" Quinn got inches away from Santana's face, seeing the look of terror on it, and she was enjoying it. She… she was… enjoying it…

Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. She shouldn't feel like this. Quinn let go of her collar, and Santana dropped to the floor, gasping for breath. Quinn slammed the knife back into place, and shoved it back into her pockets. She couldn't feel her hands shaking, and she knew she was as pale as a ghost. "Your boyfriend's looking for you, hate to keep him waiting."

Santana scrambled up and out the door. Quinn couldn't stop shaking, as she watched the look of fear turn to terror on the Latina's face. She knew who this behavior reminded her of, and she wanted to vomit. This really shouldn't be happening. She was letting her violent tendencies take over, and she was acting like Rachel was an object for her to possess. Fuck, fuck no, this was all too familiar. "Are you ok?" She turned back to Rachel, grabbing a paper towel to wipe her eyes.

"Of course, you build a resistance to this sort of thing." Rachel thanked Quinn for the paper towel, and once again peeled off her wet white top to reveal the same black bra as yesterday. "You want to stare don't you?" She looked up to see the blonde leaning on the sink, blushing.

Quinn looked up from Rachel's chest and at her eyes. She really couldn't tell what Rachel was thinking, but she felt her cheeks turning hot as she realized she had been caught. "Well, you're gorgeous. Of course I want to." Shit, that was too forward. "I'm sorry, that was way out of line."

"It's alright, I don't mind." Rachel leaned into her back, pulling out the Black Sabbath t-shirt and sliding it on. "But the show's over for now" She smiled as she felt Quinn put her hands on her hips, pulling her forward.

"Damn, I was beginning to really enjoy it." Quinn kissed Rachel, wanting to run her hands onto the tan skin under the black top, but she knew better. Fuck, she felt Rachel leaning onto her, and the bulge in pants was growing. That's just what she need, for Rachel to notice. She held the brunette inches away from her, and she could feel Rachel's breath tremble, wanting to get closer.

Rachel felt Quinn's hands around her waist, keeping her back. She had her arms around Quinn's shoulders, wanting to get closer, twisting a strand of the blonde's hair around her finger. She was falling in love with their kisses. She wanted to lean on Quinn, to feel the blonde's arms around her, but she knew she had to let Quinn make the first moves. That was beginning to seem difficult.

The bell rang, breaking both girls out of the bubble they had formed. Rachel pulled away reluctantly, taking both of Quinn's hands in intertwining their fingers.

"Still want to go to class Princess?" Quinn leaned her forehead on Rachel's, leaning down just to reach the brunette.

"Not really, but we have to." Rachel closed her eyes, being supported by Quinn. She wished this wasn't a school bathroom, and really her bedroom. Instead of leaning against the sink, Quinn would be against the bed frame, with noticeable less clothing... damn, she really shouldn't think like this. The wait would see endless if she did.

"We don't have to. We could go back to the parking lot and just stay in the backseat all day." Quinn smiled as Rachel let out a slight gasp.

"Quinn Fabray, what are you suggesting?" She feigned shock. She honestly wouldn't mind if Quinn did take her to the car and they could find somewhere to park and enjoy themselves all day. No, she couldn't… wait, Quinn was kissing her again… maybe she could.

"Nothing… just a… little bit… of freedom." Quinn whispered between kisses, biting on the brunette's lip slightly, and she smiled as Rachel let out a small, formerly-repressed moan.

"I… I can't." Why did she just say that?! Rachel felt Quinn nod, and she pulled away slowly. She tilted the blonde's head up a little, and met her sparkling eyes. "If you're suggesting what I'm thinking, I would rather do it on a bed then in a car."

"Of course," Quinn rolled her eyes, smiling. "What was I thinking? Royalty doesn't like quickies." She laughed, seeing Rachel turn red. They were so late to class, but Quinn didn't give a shit. This was too much fun.

"I never said that," Rachel mumbled, "I just prefer satin sheets to leather interior. Are you suggesting what I think you are?"

Quinn bit her lip. Yes, of course they were thinking the same thing, but in Quinn's head, Rachel wouldn't run away when Quinn took off her pants. "Well, I have two Gameboys with Pokémon and a transfer cable in the trunk. I was thinking we could just battle all day, passing around a bottle of coke. What were you thinking?" She laughed, seeing the confused look on Rachel's face.

"I was assuming you meant something totally different." Rachel rolled her eyes at Quinn's sarcasm.

Another stolen kiss, the slight taste of Rachel, it was driving Quinn nuts. These little quick kisses really weren't cutting it. "Not now, I don't want to jump in that fast. Give me a little time." She whispered, trying to keep emotions in check.

"I understand," Rachel nodded. They both needed time, but teenage hormones were getting in the way of rational thought. "One more kiss?"

Quinn silently leaned in and met Rachel's lips with hers. It wasn't fast, or hurried, like before; like she was trying to get as much of Rachel as she could. This was slow, passionate. She didn't try to get Rachel's tongue; she enjoyed the taste of the brunette, biting softly on Rachel's lower lip. This was what perfection was, it had to be. She had never felt anything like this before, and it was just a kiss.

Rachel could feel it too, that spark. It certainly wasn't small, and she loved it. Quinn's hand was on her cheek, and her skin was tingling as Quinn rubbed it slowly with her thumb. She was drawing out the blonde's taste, coaxing something special out of her. The blonde softly bit her lip, and she felt something inside her jump. This was how romance was supposed to feel like, and she was absorbing everything.

Please, let this kiss last forever. She knew that sounded sappy, but she meant it; Quinn could somehow give everything in one kiss, and she could do it well. Rachel felt like this was the first time, and she wanted every time to be like this one. She wanted to say those three words, but she didn't know how to say it.

Quinn would've gladly said them; if she could, she would've told Rachel she loved her right then and there. How could she? She had no idea how to use them properly. No one had ever taught her, and she had never used them before, except to a doll that her parents forced her to leave behind. Rachel was exactly like that old Cinderella doll; they actually showed her love, and they were both… perfect. How could she tell a living person she loved them?

A part of her wanted control, but she knew that was from all the years without it. She couldn't say to Rachel 'I love you', not until she was sure of the response she was going to get. Quinn needed to know these things; she had to make sure Rachel wasn't going to run. Thank God this kiss was a lasting one.

It was like a dare, who was going to pull away first. Every time Rachel tried, Quinn managed to pull her back in, and when it seemed Quinn was about to let go, Rachel would press a little closer to her. Finally, Rachel drew away, and Quinn let her.

"How about we skip first period?" Quinn whispered, silently hoping that Rachel wouldn't run when she found out. The smaller girl wouldn't find out for a while, Quinn was sure of that, but when she did… No, Quinn couldn't think of the worst now.

"We should go, we really should. It's still the first month of school…" Rachel trailed off, unsure of how to leave. Why couldn't she just leave the school, and willingly get into Quinn's car so they could just go hang out.

"Alright… how about after school, we do something." Quinn whispered, taking Rachel's hands. She looked at them, so tiny and soft.

"Of course, I'd like that a lot." Rachel smiled, feeling Quinn take her hands. This had to be a dream. Nothing like this ever happened to Rachel Barbra Berry, never.

"Good, I'll think of something before school ends," Quinn leaned down, and picked up the fallen bags. Somehow, during their kissing, they had managed to land on the floor. "Are you sure you don't want to skip, we've already missed 40 minutes."

"We also willingly spent 40 minutes in a public restroom; we can spend the rest in class. Where it's clean." Rachel looked at Quinn, a playful smile on her lips.

"Yes, but in here, we were doing something we both enjoy." Quinn laughed slightly as she heard that. "I know what that sounded like, but you get it."

"Of course I do," Rachel took Quinn's hand, and led her out of the bathroom, still grinning. She had to be starry eyed now.

The halls were dead empty as they left the bathroom. Rachel turned to look at Quinn, who was grinning like she was high. Rachel suspect on some level, they both were; the last 40 minutes had given them both a drug. She grabbed Quinn's hand, the cuff of the leather jacket brushing against her skin, and started pulling the reluctant blonde down the English hallway. She huffed when she noticed the door was closed, and the blind on the window was shut. "We missed a lecture, that's just great."

With her hand inches away from the door knob, Rachel felt her other arm being pulled quickly, and the door to the picnic tables swung open. The cool autumn air nipped at her cheeks, and Rachel wished she had brought her jacket, and not just this thin shirt. "Quinn what are you doing!"

"Relax Princess; we missed most of class, why go now? Calm down a little." Quinn smiled, pulling Rachel outside, onto the bleachers. She didn't know the town well enough to go get a bite to eat quickly.

"But Qui…" Rachel could barely get the word out before Quinn caught her in another kiss. She could really get used to this.

"Rach, relax. I'll find a way to get the notes and you won't have to worry about failure." Quinn pulled back, and walked over to one of the picnic tables. She climbed on the top of one, balancing on the wood like a skateboard, and saw the look on Rachel's face turn from shock to amusement. "What? You think this is funny"

"Yes, I actually do," Rachel giggled, climbing on top with Quinn. She stuck out her hands, and Quinn took them gently, pulling her onto the wood beside her. Rachel smiled, feeling Quinn's grip on her hands loosen as she found her balance. "How did you manage to find the most wrecked picnic tale out here?" She laughed as she almost fell, the wooden plank shaking from side to side.

"I guess I'm just unlucky that way." Quinn grabbed Rachel before she fell, and spun the brunette around, holding her around the waist with one arm. "Once you get the hang of it, it's fun. It's like skateboarding; all about learning to balance."

"I've never skateboarded, I wouldn't know." Rachel felt Quinn's cheek brush against her hair as a protective arm wrapped around her waist. She felt the blonde rocking back and forth on the loose planks, making them tremble, yet still keeping her balance. "We should get off, what if we fall."

"One, we're two feet off the ground. I don't think we'll get hurt. Two, this thing won't break. Relax Princess, I keep telling you that. Have a little fun." Quinn felt the smaller body go relaxed in her arms, and she smiled, Rachel's hair brushed against her cheek. This felt so, so good. "Don't worry, I got you." Quinn whispered, feeling Rachel shiver at the words, and a tingle run across her own spine. She wasn't lying, for once, she meant every goddamn word.

Rachel nodded, feeling the words settle in, and Quinn's hot breath still lingering on her should in the coolness of the fall air. School was becoming bothersome. It was never really something she looked forward too, but now she just wanted to be with Quinn. She felt the blonde's embrace tighten as the arm across her waist pulled her closer, and Quinn's chin rested on her shoulder.

"I got you,"

-.-

Santana Lopez was not here to play nice. She knew exactly what she wanted, more or less, and she was going to get it. That new girl who was playing nice to Berry seemed like a bitch, and she couldn't let that Blondie overthrow her position as the Head Bitch at school.

Really, she didn't have anything to worry about. Everyone, and she meant _everyone_, knew not to pick a fight with her. Yeah, her father might be the head surgeon at Lima's top hospital, but it was amazing how quickly rumors could start. Her "ghetto, Lima heights" reputation really helped.

"Hey San," Santana turned her head with a swish of the high ponytail and looked at the happy blonde beside her. She rolled her eyes inadvertently and saw a small frown appear on Brittany's face.

"Britt, why did you actually volunteer to go with RuPaul for the duet yesterday?" Santana grabbed a slushie out of a kid's hand, and stared him down before he could protest. She was going to be the first to get that loud midget today. The idea that Brittany would willingly work with Berry made her gnash her teeth in jealousy.

"I heard Kurt was going with Mercedes, but then he wasn't, and I already told Mr. Shue that I'm working with her." Brittany said innocently, and Santana couldn't believe how naïve she was being.

"So tell him you changed your mind. C'mon Britt, don't be stupid. Why would you associate yourself with Berry? Of all people?" The two walked past a hallway, and Santana could see Puck leaning against her locker, his hands jammed into his pockets. She would definitely get to him later. She also saw Berry, laughing about something at her locker with Blondie again; that tall girl looked like she was trying to be in a nineties grunge band.

"I'm not stupid. I hate it when you say that, everyone else already says that about me." Brittany hung her head a little, trying to keep her emotions in check. Santana had used her father's clout to get Brittany into one of her honors classes, but the blonde was acting like this lately. Santana knew why, but she knew she couldn't do what Brittany wanted.

"I'm going to class; I'll see you at lunch." Brittany headed in the direction of her locker before remembering that Santana always opened it for her. She could never remember the combination. She sucked in her breath, and decided to walk around a bit before finding her classroom.

Santana rolled her eyes, clutching the cup tighter, and she pulled open the door to the bathroom. With one death stare, the freshman girls by the sinks cleared out, and she set the strawberry drink down on the sink, fixing her makeup.

She was well aware of why Brittany was acting so hurt and moody. The blonde had recently found out she was having sex with Puck, and if Santana ever caught the person who told Brittany that, she'd rip their head off. Brittany was sensitive, and she was crushing hard on Santana. The Latina had created a delicate balance where she could be with Brittany, to a certain extent, and be with Puck.

Occasionally, she would feel bad. Brittany was romantic as hell, and the few kisses they had shared were much better than any of Puck's. But this wasn't some stupid teenage TV show, where you could come out and people wouldn't hate you, this was fucking real life, and that made it complicated. Puck could be her boyfriend for as long as she needed him, and after this high school shit was done, she could start fresh with Brittany as her girl.

Brittany would have to forgive for all the times she had fucked Puck though. Santana snapped out of her thoughts when the eyeliner jabbed into her eye, and she blinked back the pain, looking at the raccoon eyes she had given herself. While scowling and washing the black away, a stupid thought crossed her mind. What if Brittany never forgave her; what if the blonde refused to let this go. A small part of her felt like she deserved that, but she blocked that out too. Brittany wasn't like that, she was too good.

Santana glanced at the clock on the wall, and grimaced. English homeroom with Blondie and Man Hands. Oh what a wonderful way to start a day. She grabbed the slushie cup, hoping to run into the midget before she got to class.

The door opened, and there she was. Berry looked straight at her, and Santana didn't hesitate. She tossed the slushie, and smirked, watching the horrified look on Berry's face. "Aww, looking RuPaul, back in her natural element. Strawberry actually makes you look somewhat like a girl." Then she noticed the look of anger on Blondie standing behind her; and she ignored it. Santana brushed it off, tossed the cup into the trash, and began to walk out of the bathroom as Berry stepped in.

Why the hell was Blondie grabbing her? God, this bitch was dumb; she didn't know who she was messing with. Santana suppressed a slight mutter of pain as Blondie grabbed her ponytail, and she felt the wind being knocked out of her as she was thrown against the wall. Fuck, Blondie was strong. Why was she so fucking strong?

She felt the red collar of the Cheerios uniform dig into her neck as she was hoisted off the floor by the blonde She-Hulk. She clawed at Blondie's hand, but that just made her feet dangle higher off the floor.

"You really have to get off that pedestal you're on, or I'll knock down brick by brick." Fabray hissed, and Santana just squired, trying to get the stitching of the uniform out of her neck. She could feel it pressing tightly against her skin and her head was beginning to feel like it might explode. Was she going to die here because her head would explode? No, she couldn't; that's impossible. Still, this wasn't the ideal position, and she was too scared to rebuttal Blondie's statement.

She has a goddamn knife?! Nope, she was going to die here, and Brittany would never be her girl. Well, that fucking sucked. Santana would've burst into tears if she wasn't so terrified of She-Hulk. She felt herself tremble as the metal pressed against her cheek, and she could honestly say that she thought her heart would stop from terror.

"You do that again, I'll hurt you, and I'll make it look like a fucking accident. Do you understand me?" She-Hulk got inches away from the Latina's face, and Santana gulped, nodding. Well congratulations to Blondie, she was the first person to make Santana Lopez feel like a complete and total wuss.

Santana felt the stitching pop away from her skin, and the tiled bathroom floor was suddenly underneath her. Under any other circumstance, she would not be on a public bathroom floor, ever. Exceptions would be made only if there was drinking involved, and of course, being held against the wall with a knife to her face. Santana was convinced Blondie was going to kick her, and she actually waited for the pain to come so she could get up and run. And Blondie was standing right above her, so she really couldn't move.

"Your boyfriend's looking for you, hate to keep him waiting." With that, Fabray moved aside, and Santana sprung to her feet and bolted. She didn't notice how Blondie had turned a new shade of white with the last sentence, she frankly didn't care. She wanted to get out. Now. Puck would have to wait because the bell was going to ring any second.

She needed something to relax her though, and although she was sure Brittany would be more than happy to fuck her, she needed Puck to calm her down. She needed something that she was sure of, and yes, she did trust Brittany, but she certainly didn't want her first time with the innocent blonde to be because she needed to relax. Lunch was going to be canceled, and Brittany was not going to be happy about that.

Santana stepped into the English class just as the bell rang, and she ran her hand against the back of her neck, feeling the slight groove still from the collar. She went to her seat and dropped the bag on the ground, looking at the two empty spots at the front of the room. Berry had been at the front all last week as well, and Santana began wondering why Fabray had come a week late. Did she really care? Before this morning, no, but now… hell, that bitch had probably been in juvie.

Grinning deviously at the idea for the rumor, Santana scribbled it in her notebook. She didn't care if the bitch was a Saint reincarnate; the Latina was taking her down. This was something she needed to remember. She knew she wouldn't forget it, but still. Whipping out her phone as well, and hiding it in her lap, she hurriedly texted the mohawked boy, who was probably skipping class.

_Meet me at lunch. Your car ;)_

**-.-.-.-.-**

_Quinn leans against her bedroom wall, wedged between her dresser and the wall, holding Cinderella tightly. She strokes the blonde hair on the doll, and sings to it in a whisper, smiling as she sings. She knew that she had to come up here because Father would want to give her Punishment. He can't do that if he couldn't find her. She can just hide here until he fell asleep. _

_The watch's face illuminated the dark crevice, and Quinn sucks in her breath. It's only 11, and she knew that Father would still be awake for another hour. Her legs are starting to feel tingly, like pinpricks, and she hugs them tightly to her chest. She knows how to get out of the window; it's not that hard really. Just climb down the trellis. _

_The darkness is starting to cover her like a blanket, and she keeps pressing the button on her watch to keep her awake. She doesn't want to fall asleep, because then she would be woken up by Father. Still, this darkness is making her remember the Punishment that had happened a few days before. She had just turned 8, which was ok. She didn't have any friends to celebrate it with, and the only person who had said happy birthday was her teacher. Then Father gave her punishment. _

_Quinn hears the words he said run rampant in her head and she rubs her neck nervously. It feels like his fingers were there again, closing in on her airway. She knows she has a small cut on the back of her neck; he had lifted her up and tossed her against the wall in his study. Quinn holds Cinderella tighter, pulling the doll's dress up over its head. Using her watch, she looks at the red lines she had drawn on the doll's back. _

_Now they really matched. They both had blonde hair, and Quinn had coloured Cinderella's eyes brown because she didn't have a hazel marker and now they both had matching scars. Quinn stares at the blue car that's in the front of the dolls fake underwear, and she takes it out, running her pink fingernails over the metallic body. _

_All of a sudden, she's angry, and sad. She wants to cry, and she wants to punch something. Why does she have to get hurt? Why does he hurt her? It isn't her fault she was born this way, and she feels the tears burn hot on her cheeks. Why did Father hate her so much? Quinn grabs the car and starts hitting the back of the doll with it. She presses it hard against the doll's backside, biting her lip because in her head, she can hear herself scream. _

_The car hits the floor with a dull thud, and Quinn hugs the doll tightly. "I'm sorry Cinderella, I'm sorry. I'm sorry." Quinn whispered, over and over. She felt her shirt become damp with tears and the doll's hair was getting wet too, but she couldn't stop. She didn't mean to hurt Cinderella, she didn't… she didn't know where that anger came from…_

_Quinn balls her fists and clutched the doll tightly. She could never be like Father… she just couldn't. "C'mon Cinderella, we're going outside." Quinn stands up, and slides out from underneath the dresser, looking out the bedroom door. She lingers for a second, listening to the loudness of the news on the TV downstairs. The blue light is giving the stairs a glow, and Quinn wants to pretend its blue fireflies. She had always wanted to catch a firefly in a jar and make a wish on it. _

_She unlocks her bedroom window, and shuts her door. She swings one leg over the windowsill, and feels the wind brush against her face. Spring was always her favourite season, and she thinks she's lucky that her birthday's in it. She looks out onto her street, and misses the familiar oak trees that were in lined the Michigan streets. Idaho wasn't that same. She really misses Maine though. If she closes her eyes tightly, so tight she can see stars; she remembers the sand under her feet and the smell of pine in her bedroom. _

_Quinn grabs the trellis with one foot, and scurries down it like a chipmunk. Cinderella is under one arm, and she smiles as she climbs down. She feels like the Prince in Rupunzel. At the end of the night, she'd climb back up, and find a real Princess waiting for her. The Princess would tell her she's pretty and she's sweet and she's good. The smile trembles; she knew that no one ever thought she was any of those things. She wants a Princess… _

_Mother's flower garden is under her sock feet and Quinn jumps over the fence into the backyard. She slips on a pair of rubber sandals that had been outside since before they had moved in. She holds Cinderella by the hand, and puts the blue car in her pocket, thinking about the boy who gave it to her. She doesn't even remember the state they were in. "Thanks mystery boy," She whispers, spinning the wheels in her pocket. _

_The flat park behind the house looks so spooky in the moonlight. It's a bunch of rolling hills leading into a stream with a big pipe at the end and rocks. Quinn looks at the back of all the fences as she leaves the back gate. One house has a swing for a little kid and a trampoline! She's never been on a trampoline before! Quinn presses her face against the wrought iron fence and looks up at the large house. She doesn't know these people lived only 4 doors down. Maybe the kids here can be her friends. _

_Quinn starts skipping along the edge of the hills, looking at all the backyards. One has a really pretty pool, and another has a large garden. She starts humming to herself, songs from the Little Mermaid. "Just look at the world around you, right here on the ocean floor." Quinn begins running down the hill to the stream in the center. _

"_Such wonderful things surround you, what more are you looking for?" Quinn sings softly to herself, grinning. She holds Cinderella in her arms, and jumps into the trickle that was coming out of the cracked rocks. Her socks are wet, and the sandals squeak but she doesn't care. She stomps and dances, jumping from one rock to another. _

"_Under the sea, under the sea, darling it's better, down where it's wetter, take it from me." Quinn jumps, and the water splashes the back of her legs. The wet denim sticks to her, but she doesn't care now. "Up on the shore, they work all day, out in the sun, they slave away." Quinn leans down, looking for a crab or a fish that might've traveled from the ocean. _

"_While we devotin' full time to floatin' under the sea." Quinn makes a large splash off a flat rock and lands in water that swallows her up. It's almost to her waist, and she grabs the rock, pulling herself up. Maybe she shouldn't be swimming here, but she doesn't know where else to go. She steps onto the rock, and sits down. Oops, she lost the old sandals, sorry previous owners. _

"_I wish I could live under the sea, and be with friends and float away. Wouldn't it be nice to just go float away." Quinn looks at Cinderella in the eyes and she feels sorry for what she did before. "I'm sorry for hurting you Cinderella. I just got mad. I know it's not a good excuse, but I hope you'll forgive me. You're my only friend." Quinn sees a change of gleam in the doll's eyes and smiles. "Thanks Cinderella, it won't happen again, I promise. No matter how mad I am." _

_Quinn feels happier. Like the moon changed positions, and the sky is brighter. It's so nice out. She can see flickers of light coming from the pipe, and she stares in awe. Fireflies, at least ten of them. She holds Cinderella close and watches as the beads of light jump from place to place. It's so pretty. _

_Maybe she could capture them and wish on them before setting them free. She'd wish for a bunch of things; like the house back in Maine, with the pine trees. She'd wish that Father would never punish her like that again, it hurt so much. She freezes at the thought, remembering her face being pushed against the table, and her arms pinned down. He tied her wrists…and he laughed. Quinn closes her eyes tightly, until she can see fireflies in her eyelids. He laughed, he liked it. She hated it. _

_She shakes her head, and thinks about her wishes. Ten fireflies and ten wishes. She already has two, so she'd wish for a puppy that gives her big wet puppy kisses, and friends, at least 3 friends. So that makes 6 wishes. That's all she really wants. Quinn looks at the fireflies again. She'd wish for a Princess of her own. A real life Princess and Quinn could be her Hero. _

_She finally checks her watch, and it's almost 2. Wow, she didn't know time could pass that fast. Quinn stands up, and notices how her jeans had become stiff from the water. She jumps off the rock and onto the grass, crossing the hills back to her own backyard. The fireflies have disappeared, and Quinn shakes her head. Maybe they went to go take her wishes to the firefly in charge. Maybe they were going to grant her wishes. _

_Quinn climbs over the fence again, and lands in the backyard. She lost the sandals and her socks are wet and muddy. Hopping over the other fence, she tucks Cinderella under her arm and climbs up the trellis. Her window is still open, good, that means she doesn't have to stay outside all night. But… oh no… he's in there… snoring… _

_The ground is under her again, and she hugs herself, walking onto the front porch to sleep on the bench. She clings to Cinderella and plays over scenes from The Little Mermaid in her head. She tries to get comfortable on the bench, but it's hard and uncomfortable. _

"_Well Cinderella, we're both outcasts tonight. I guess I'm not a Princess. I'm Ursula. Or Scar, or Hades." Quinn whispers, yawning. She's finally tired, and her jeans are stiff and her sweater is damp. "I have the poison apple, now I have to figure out a way to get Father to eat it." _

**-.-.-.-.-.-.-**

"Really Rach, do we have to stay here?" Quinn said, rolling her eyes to be in the math class. "We already missed half the day, why do we have to stay the other half. We could've been halfway to New York City by now."

"So geography isn't your strong subject?" Rachel grinned, seeing Quinn break out in a toothy smile, stretching her arms above her head. The blonde's bracelet's clattered around her wrists, the beads clinking together.

"Well, it's a long ass drive; we could've at least started going there." Quinn lay down on the desk, half asleep. Science had been ditched, and they had gone to a vegan fast food place that Rachel _loved _to eat. Never again.

"Of course, and your parent's would've have gotten worried when you didn't come home at night?" Rachel said innocently, and noticed a grimace waver across Quinn's face. The blonde quickly covered that up, but it rang some alarm bells in Rachel's head.

"They wouldn't care. I don't care either." Quinn looked at the door, seeing the Crazy Cat Lady come in again... never mind, her name was Brittany. Rachel had given her a lecture about how she wasn't crazy, just… simple minded. "Where's the other half of dumb and dumber?"

"Quinn, don't call her that." Rachel could see Brittany had noticed the two, and came over, holding her books in front of her tightly.

"Hi Rachel, Hi Quinn." Brittany smiled, somewhat sadly. If Quinn noticed this, Rachel obviously did too. Santana's wrath had gotten to everyone this morning.

"Hi Brittany, how are you?" Rachel put on a mega-watt smile, and Quinn rolled her eyes, facing away from the taller blonde.

"Ok, I guess. Can I sit with you two today?" Brittany looked at the seat behind Quinn, and Rachel nodded.

"Of course, you don't have to ask permission to sit somewhere." Rachel smiled again, and kicked Quinn quickly. She sat up with a grimace, and turned to Brittany, trying to smile.

"Hi Brittany." Quinn sputtered out, smiling weakly. It was a little unnerving seeing Brittany upset, all she had seen was a smiley, bubbly, really annoyingly happy Brittany. "Why are you so upset?"

"Santana ditched me at lunch to go with Puck," Brittany said glumly. She put her textbooks out on her desk, and leaned back in her chair, fidgeting uncomfortably.

"Well, now you can ditch her. It's karma." Quinn bit her lip, holding back a small groan of annoyance when Brittany looked at her curiously. "You know, Karma, what goes around comes around, payback." The blonde got the last one and nodded. "And speak of the devil."

The three turned to see Santana enter the class, looking first to the usually seat, surprised to see Brittany's absence. Then she looked at Rachel, and Quinn laughed, seeing the enraged and confused look on her face.

"Shit, Princess, we're a little screwed." Quinn nudged Rachel, seeing Santana stalk to her position at the back of the class, looking as though someone had glued a pole to her back. "We now have the Leader of the school pissed at us."

"She'd not that bad, she can be a little mean though." Brittany whispered, looking at Rachel as the brunette nodded.

"Well, I haven't seen the nice side of Santana Lopez. Unless slushies are her way of saying 'want to hang out'." It was Rachel's turn to roll her eyes as the bell rang, and the teacher rushed in, clutching loose papers and a bag that looked like it was from Woodstock '69. "Brittany, if you need help with the work, we'll be happy to help." Rachel nudged Quinn again as the blonde let out a silent sigh and nodded.

"Thanks Rachel, I'm not that good at math. Santana usually helps me with the homework and stuff" Brittany smiled warmly at Rachel and the brunette offered one back. She had to admit, becoming friends with Brittany was an automatic hall pass from the slushies, and that was something she could be ok with.

Quinn pulled out her sketchbook, and started drawing an amine version of Rachel, with her name in large bubble letters. This class would drag, and she needed something to occupy her time. The pencil slingshot wouldn't work again, the teacher seemed to be staring at her most of the time.

She felt a pencil poke her back, and she jumped, glad the teacher was staring at some problem on the board. She whipped around, and looked at the doodles covering Brittany's notebook in between random numbers and signs. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing. You're a really good artist." Brittany pointed the pencil in her hand towards the sketchbook, and Quinn nodded. She wasn't sure how to react to compliments. She wasn't given them often as a kid, and they always made her feel awkward now.

"Uh… thanks." Quinn blushed, and turned around, feeling the pencil hit her shirt again, "What?"

"You should teach art lessons instead of being here." Brittany whispered, looking over Quinn's shoulder at the scantily clad anime on the paper. "Somewhere famous, like New York or Hollywood."

"Thanks Britt. Believe me, I would if I could." Quinn hissed back, hearing the chalk clink against the metal ledge, and she whipped around, facing the front and covering up her drawing with the finished homework.

_I would if I could… _

-.-


	6. Dead To The World

**Hi everyone. so it's labour day weekend, and this might be the last post for a while because I'm going to be super busy with school again. Hope you all enjoy it. I won't forget about this story though, I like it a lot. **

**So thanks again to everyone who took the time to review. honestly, reviews make my day.  
**

**Warning! graphic violence, mentions of rape and child abuse, bullying, and otherwise dark subject matter. Don't like, don't read. All mistakes are mine, and I don't own glee. I wish I did.  
**

**Enjoy the chapter  
**

* * *

Ah, finally October, almost Halloween. Quinn crunched on the leaves in the path as Rachel rushed to catch up with her, holding two coffees. The park was quite pretty this time of year; the warm hues made everything brighter. Quinn knew that fall was typically the time when everything died, but the warm colours made her think otherwise.

"So are you doing anything special for Halloween?" Rachel looped her arm into Quinn's and handed the blonde the coffee. She sipped hers slowly, balling her hands in her mittens. She exhaled calmly and watched as her breath misted in the chilly air. The cold front was coming on faster than usual.

"Not really, just hanging out in my apartment and eating a bowl of candy." Quinn grinned, feeling Rachel stare at her. "What? It's just another night."

"No it's not. It's when you can dress up in costumes and you get a reward for knocking on strangers doors. It's the one night of the year where the 'don't take candy from strangers' rule doesn't apply." Rachel sputtered out.

"You are aware that we're 16, right?" Quinn stomped hard on a leaf with the black army boots, listening to Rachel snicker.

"Well you seem to be enjoying yourself, crunching the leaves. And I'm not 16 yet, my birthday is in December." Rachel smiled as Quinn caught another leaf underneath her boot, and the concrete sidewalk turned to gravel, the pebbles crunching.

"It's a satisfying sound, can you blame me?" Quinn kicked a large stone across the path, and looked up at the grassy area they were walking in. "Do you know where we are?"

"Yes, it's a forest path behind the houses. I figured since you enjoy the fall nature scenery, I'd show you this." Rachel sipped the coffee again, clinging to Quinn. The specific path had trees lining one side, and a sloping hill leading into a rocky yet deep pond that was covering in long grass and flowers.

"It's gorgeous scenery, very nice," Quinn sipped the Ice Cap, gritting her teeth as they froze initially at the taste. "I'd love to try drawing this."

"You should, I can show you a wonderful little parkette that's on this path." Rachel felt Quinn's soft lips brush against her cheek, and she grinned. These little sporadic bouts of affection really made her feel special. "And you can tell me why you dislike Halloween"

"I don't dislike it; I just never got into it." Quinn missed the taste of Rachel, and she stole another kiss, leaving the brunette to blush softly. The air was quiet, with the exception of the crunching gravel. The clouds covered the sky, creating a very fall-like atmosphere.

Rachel rested a head on Quinn's shoulder, glad that their relationship had lasted more than a month. She half expected Quinn to ignore the one month marking, but the blonde had surprised her with a necklace that she was now playing with. The deep purple heart crystal hung on a string, and the smoothness of the stone was pleasing to Rachel's fingertips.

_It's purple, the colour of royalty. You deserve it Princess. _Quinn's words echoed around in her head, and she smiled, nuzzling her cheek against Quinn's sleeved arm. The black fabric was softer than she thought, and the hem of the vest brushed against her head softly.

"You really like that necklace, don't you?" Quinn whispered, looking around the large woodland area. She heard the string of the necklace brush against the neckline of Rachel's jacket. The back of her hand was itching slightly, and she rubbed the bandage uncomfortably.

"Why wouldn't I? You gave it to me; of course I'd love it." Rachel let go of the stone and took Quinn's bandaged hand. "I can't believe Puck 'forgot' that you were beside him. Doesn't this hurt?"

"A little, but it's stitched up well and I'll survive a small cut." Quinn chuckled. This was literally nothing in comparison to what she had dealt with before.

"It's a stab to your hand with a carving knife. That's not a small cut Quinn. A small cut is a paper cut; this is something that would happen if you were mugged. It shouldn't happen in high school wood shop." Rachel squeezed Quinn's arm gently, letting the bandages fall back, and the blonde shoved both hands into her vest's pockets.

"Whatever, I don't have to see him until Monday. I'll be OK." Looking across the lake, she could see a small yellow peak come out of the long grass. "Is that the park you were talking about?"

"Yes," Rachel picked up speed as they walked along the gravel, Quinn looking at the dying flowers that lined the gravel path. When they were alive, they must've been gorgeous. They crossed over a bridge, and Quinn looked down at the rocks on the ground sticking out of the water.

"I used to play on rocks like those when I was a kid." Quinn half smiled, looking at Rachel surprised face. "I used to sing songs from the Little Mermaid, and I would look for Sebastian the crab. Or I would stand on the tallest one and sing stuff from the Lion King."

"You're kidding? Why did you do that?" Rachel smiled, still a little shocked. She knew Quinn had a soft spot for Disney movies, even though her exterior persona said otherwise.

Quinn shrugged, looking as the park came into view. "I don't know. I wanted to sing, and my parents didn't bug me when I was playing in a river."

Rachel shook her head in a daze, a smile still lingering on her face. "That sounds like fun. I used to play the floor is lava with the couches in the den. That was the extent of my adventure. Except for one thing."

"And what would that be Princess?" Quinn stepped into the sand of the tiny park and looked at the two rusty swings. A lone slide that had the yellow covering was at the edge, and there was a teeter totter. Damn, this thing was tiny.

"I one took all the cushions off my couch, and stacked them up. Then I climbed on top of them, and it collapsed. I got a bloody nose and a few cuts on my forehead, but it was fun." Rachel giggled as Quinn laughed.

"Ok, remind me about that one day, and we'll do it." Quinn felt Rachel let go of her, and the two walked to the swings. Quinn stood up on the plastic seat, and watched as Rachel sat down, beginning to pump. "Do you really want to know why I don't care about Halloween?" Quinn looked down at Rachel, who was looking towards the path, opposite to her.

"Yes please," Rachel looked up at her. She was actually quite happy with how their relationship was progressing. Quinn hadn't pressured her into anything, the most they had done was a heavy make-out in Rachel's bathroom before school. Quinn was also opening up a little about her childhood; something Rachel had previously thought was forbidden territory.

"My parent's never let me dress up, and I wasn't even allowed to hand out treats to the other kids. I couldn't have candy either." Quinn recalled the nights she spent locked in her bedroom because her father didn't want her out mixing with the 'normal' kids. Yeah, he used those exact words. It was because she was too much of a freak.

"That must've been terrible." Rachel could hear faint gravelly footsteps in the distance, and she brushed it off. Other kids knew about this park too, it wasn't weird to have people come to a public place. It was still offsetting to here the footsteps. The sky wasn't welcoming, and she was getting a chill from the wind.

"It doesn't matter. It's the past. Can't change your history." Quinn started swinging back and forth slowly, listening to the gravelly crunches too. It was four in the afternoon on a Saturday, who would want to come to a park when Halloween preparations _must be done? _

"Oh look who we have here," Quinn turned around, and Rachel looked up from the sand to see Santana emerge from the gravelly trail, Puck on her heels. The hulking brute stood in a ripped pair of jeans and leather jacket, and Santana looked like the whore she usually was. Other people would see it as being modestly dressed of course, but both girls knew that wasn't the case.

"Get lost JLo." Quinn called, ignoring the steam coming out of Santana's ears at the words. "I have better things to do than talk to you today."

"Fuck off," Santana yelled back, and Rachel started to protest before Puck came up from behind the Latina and grabbed Quinn by the back of the vest off the swing. "You really think you can mess with me and get away with it?" She landed hard on the sand, her knees buckling quickly before she got back on her feet.

"Oh yeah, me mess with you, that's real funny." Quinn hissed out as Puck grabbed her neck collar. She tried tugging away, but the lining of her shirt dug into her neck harshly. "If I recall correctly, you were the one who's been telling everyone I've been in juvie, you're the one who filling my locker with slushies, and you were the one who has been somehow stealing my sketchbooks." Quinn slammed her closed fist hard on Puck's wrist, smiling as he let out a groan of protest. "And this ape has been mauling me in woodshop. How am I the bad guy?"

"You don't remember the knife you pulled on me? And all those door slammings." Santana got close to Quinn's face, ignoring the midget's attempts to pull her off. "You're lucky I don't have Puck beat the shit out of you now."

"Go fuck yourself." Quinn spat on her face, and watching with glee as the Latina wiped off the saliva, replacing it with a disgusted frown.

"Hey RuPaul, stop touching me," Santana spun around, landing a solid punch on Rachel's right eye. Quinn's eyes widened at the sound of bone against bone, and she lurched forward, only to be pulled back by Puck. The shirt was cutting into her neck, she didn't care; she cared about Rachel, and the brunette was clearly hurting.

"Let go of me, you brute!" Quinn tried wiggling out of her vest, but Puck grabbed her hair instead, holding her back as Santana landed another left hook on Rachel's face, meeting the cheek. Another punch hit the brunette's stomach, causing Rachel to collapse. Quinn felt herself scream, but she didn't process it. This couldn't be happening. "Hey, you cunt, I'm the one who could've killed you, why aren't you beating me up instead?"

Quinn saw a mix of emotions swarm across Rachel's face, before she faced Santana head on, who was standing proudly at in front of the smaller girl's pained figure. "Because, if I hurt you, it's a little pinch. Isn't that what you say to Man Hands, that you can tolerate pain? This way, I can mess with your head. Are you that stupid that I have to explain everything to you?"

Tugged at the restraints, Quinn felt herself being dragged away from Rachel, the boots digging harshly into the sand. She hit the curb, and landed on her backside, quickly standing again. "Yeah, if you think being tugged by the hair is the worst thing I've dealt with, you're the idiot." Puck grabbed her wrists tightly, and pinned them behind her back, still dragging her towards the pond that they passed by earlier. Her boots caught on the gravel, and she trashed, trying not to move her head too much.

There was a swimming pain that ran across Quinn's scalp, and she felt the ground become rough as Puck dragged her downhill. Not the fucking lake, she could think of a million things that they could do to her in that lake, and Rachel was probably still in pain. Santana and the brunette had disappeared from view, yet she could still hear the sound of fabric as the Latina bitch kicked Rachel. She wanted to cry, but she wasn't going to let them see her cry. Rachel hadn't even seen her cry.

The grass caught under her boots, and the marshland greenery brushed across her cheeks and arms. She put all her weight into trying to stay rooted in one spot, but Puck was much stronger, causing her to pull up dirt as he pulled.

She heard the splashing of water and her boots hit the liquid. She felt the wetness creep up her pant legs and her back became soaked as he pulled her into the water. She tried lunging out and kicking, but Puck seemed to be made of iron, and he wasn't letting go. "Jeez, for someone who can break a nose, you can't seem to get out of this easily." He laughed, causing a bit of bile to rise in Quinn's mouth. She could feel her father's grip on her wrists, but Puck's voice was there…

"Let. Go. Of. Me." Quinn said, panting. She tried thrashing, but all that did was create a splash. How did they even know that Quinn was here? It's not like she left a trail of breadcrumbs, inviting them to follow.

"Get real bitch. You mess with me, and you mess with my chick. You're going to pay." Puck growled, and Quinn inhaled deeply, before being pulled underwater. The water was murky, and it stung Quinn's eyes when she managed to open them. Her chest was burning, begging for oxygen, and she felt a heavy boot on her it, holding her down. She tried reaching up her hands, and legs, but they were slow and he grabbed them and held them back.

A hand started pushing on her head, the pressure building was insane. The burning in her lungs was increasing, and she desperately wanted to inhale, and live. She didn't want to die, not like this. Fuck, this wasn't happening, this couldn't be happening. She finally had something good happen to her, and now she was dying…

Quinn slammed her fists on the hand on her head, and she let out a gasp another slammed her hard on the crown of her head. The cloudy water flooded her windpipe and mouth, getting into all crevices. It burned her nose and throat, her lungs wanted to scream in protest. She couldn't hold on much longer, and she started using all her remaining strength to put up a fight.

It wasn't working… it wasn't… Rachel… God, Rachel would find her body dead in the bushes after Puck was through with her. Quinn would've cried if her eyes didn't sting so much, Rachel would be sick with grief, the brunette would be heartbroken. If she died, that might as well be torture for Rachel.

Her consciousness was beginning to falter, and Quinn finally stopped fighting. All she could think of was Rachel. She didn't want to die, not even after everything that had happened to her. Who would notice if she died? She was a nobody, a freak, a wanderer. She had been to so many states and schools in her life, people would never notice. It's not like her parents ever acknowledged her existence.

They could get away with killing her. Hell, her father probably paid them to get rid of her. Quinn's head rolled backwards, Puck's hand still there. Her vision was getting cloudy, and she couldn't stay awake.

_Live… dammit… you survive everything he did to you to die this way…_

_You have to live… you can't make Rachel suffer…_

_Rachel… _

_I'm sorry…_

-.-

Rachel heard something being dragged onto the gravel, and she weakly opened her eyes. Santana's kicks must've bruised a few ribs, and she spat out a few droplets of blood before lifting her head slightly. It quickly fell back onto the sand.

"She's breathing right?" Santana's voice flooded through the air. This was the perfect murder scene. In the middle of a secluded area, with non witnesses. Why didn't those two just kill both herself and Quinn?

"Yeah, she's alive." It was Puck's turn to speak. Rachel wanted to hurt the both of them more than she thought was possible, but she didn't. She closed her eyes and cried, feeling the warm tears sting the cut on her cheek. She would be bruised beyond belief tomorrow, and her Dads would want to know what happened. She'd lie, she had to lie. Although they did like Quinn, and they were surprised by how polite she was, they didn't trust the blonde all that much.

"Good, now I have an idea about what we can do while we wait for you to dry off." She heard the crunching of gravel as the two undoubtedly walked off. "Let's go back to your place. We'll just jump the fence." So that's how they were able to follow her. Puck's backyard faced the start of the path. And it was her idea to come here. Did she cause this?

Slowly, Rachel sat up, blood running down her cheek and her ribs were sore. She was sure they weren't broken, because she could move without the excruciating pain, but they were definitely bruised. She shakily stood up, the numbness around her eye returning.

She couldn't cry now, because if she did, she wouldn't be able to see through the tears, and she probably wouldn't be able to stop. Quinn was lying, clearly unconscious, on the gravelly path, the rocks clinging to the wet clothing and her hair strewn around. At least she was lying face up.

Rachel took a few weak steps towards the concrete before the park before collapsing on the pavement. Santana managed to get a few good hits in her legs as well, and she could tell the bruises had begun to form. She felt like something was sitting on her chest, but she took a few deep breaths and stood again, making her way as fast as she could to Quinn's sleeping form.

Knees hit the gravel hard beside the blonde, and saw that her chest was rising and falling. At least she was breathing, that was good. Rachel gently nudged Quinn's shoulder, saying her name quietly. "Quinn… Quinn… please wake up… oh god… Quinn…" She shook the blonde gently by the shoulders, noticing the breathing pattern stabilize and the blonde coughed harshly, spitting up some of the cloudy water.

"Rach…" Her voice was scratchy and slurred, and her eyes look red and puffy, but Quinn was awake. "I'm alive?"

"Yes, oh god yes... Quinn, you're alive." Rachel fumbled, but still managed to take Quinn's wet hand in hers. "We should get out of here, you must be freezing."

"Rach… I'm sorry… you must be in so much pain," Quinn sat up in a rush, but her head spun. Rachel split into two, and swirled around her vision for a second before they merged back together.

"I'm fine, don't worry about me. I'll be OK, just a bit of bruising." Rachel helped Quinn to her feet, the blonde holding the crown of her head. "Lean down a little, let me see your head." Rachel noticed the grimace on Quinn's face before she obliged. The raised bump on the crown of Quinn's head stuck out noticeably, and Rachel gently touched it, causing the blonde to emit a small whimper. "I'm so sorry Quinn. I didn't know Puck lived so close, I… I didn't… I'm…" Rachel burst into tears, and felt Quinn's arms protectively cover her.

"Rach, calm down. It's not your fault. I've been through worse. I'm sorry I let you get hurt. Santana is a dead bitch." Quinn whispered, seeing the familiar spots dance before her eyes and leaned on Rachel slightly as she caught the brunette in a tight hug. "Let's just get out of here, I'm freezing. Lean on me if you need to…" Quinn put on hand on the side of her head as it throbbed.

"No, it's alright, you seem more unstable then me." Rachel slung on arm around the blonde's waist, and felt the wetness seep into her own clothing. She watched as Quinn's breath became rapid, and stabilized again, the blonde coughing with every step, spitting out more pond water. "We should take you to a doctor Quinn, how long were you out for? And Puck hit your head, what if you're seriously hurt?"

"I'm fine. I've been hit on the head with lamps before, a punch was nothing." Quinn grimaced with every step, feeling her legs become weaker. She was trembling from the cold and from the fright. She had looked death in the face again, except this time she had kissed his grey skull; and still she was alive.

"What!?" the pitch of Rachel's voice caused Quinn to jump slightly, and the brunette calmed herself down. "When did that happen? Oh my god, Quinn, why didn't you tell me. I could've helped…"

"It was in a fight with my cousin." Quinn lied through her teeth, and leaned heavily on Rachel as she felt dizzy. "It was when I was a kid, we got in a fight. That's it." She looked down at Rachel, and saw the brown eyes boring into her. Rachel knew she was lying, but she wasn't saying anything.

Rachel sighed, knowing that pressuring Quinn to talk would just make her withdraw more. "Quinn, what if you're hurt?"

"I'm not, I'm fine. Trust me Rachel." Quinn froze in her steps, trying to clear her head from the spots. She stood, leaning on Rachel for a few minutes, waiting for the colourful dots to go away. "Alright, sorry about that, let's just go home."

"You can't drive in this condition, and I don't have my license." Rachel whispered, and Quinn silently agreed. They had to walk a good 40 minute to Rachel's house, and Quinn wasn't sure if her legs would last that long. She was shivering from the wet clothes, and sneezing like nobody's business. "Do you live around here?"

Quinn wanted to shake her head, but she knew the spots would return again. She was freezing, and her head and legs hurt, but she really didn't want to show Rachel the hovel she called 'home'. "Yes," The word came out of her mouth quickly, and she mentally kicked herself.

"Can we just go there for the time being? I'll call my Dad from there, and have him bring your car back." Rachel's face was throbbing, and she could feel it steadily become red as she tried to hold Quinn up. Her stomach still hurt, but not as badly as before. Her legs were sore from the kicks, but she could move. She knew she was intruding in Quinn's privacy, but they couldn't make the walk back to her house.

Quinn bit her lip nervously. It wasn't night, and he only came by around midnight anyways, but she still felt as though she'd see his car in the driveway. "Fine," She said through clenched teeth, and they stepped out of the forest path onto the sidewalk. "Turn left, we have to go down the dead end."

"Alright," Rachel felt Quinn trying to stand up properly, but she tightened her grip on the blonde's waist. "Lean on me Quinn, I can carry you…"

Quinn grunted in response. She didn't want to take Rachel home, she really didn't, but she wasn't stupid. They wouldn't make it back to the brunette's house. She put on weight on the brunette, and exhaled, her teeth clattering.

"Instead of going out for Halloween, how about I come to your house and we spend the night watching movies and eating candy?" Rachel tried to coax something out of the blonde, and she looked up to see Quinn shaking her head furiously. "Quinn, don't do that."

"You can't come that night." Quinn said, seeing the spots again and cursing. Russell always made a 'surprise' appearance on Halloween night. Rachel could not be there. Under any circumstances. "You just… can't." She felt so guilty looking at the hurt expression on Rachel's face.

"Why don't you come to my house then?" Rachel whispered, feeling a cold exterior begin to form around Quinn.

Quinn bit her lip nervously again, thinking. He didn't know Rachel, or where she lived. She had kept everything a secret from him, and if she walked to Rachel's, she could get away with it for the night. "Sure. I'll bring some DVD's."

"Like what?" Rachel felt the ice begin to melt, and she leaned her head gently on Quinn's shoulder.

"Corpse Bride for sure," Quinn smiled, the songs playing around in her head. "Maybe I'll dig up a copy of The Exorcist." She looked down at Rachel with a grin on her face. The brunette looked like a scared rabbit.

"Oh no, I'm not watching the Exorcist. I already dislike horror movies, and if I watch that, I won't sleep for a week." Rachel frowned at Quinn's playful grin. "And I would make you stay up with me."

"I'd be ok with that Princess." Quinn saw the rental house in front of them and pulled Rachel onto the driveway. "We have to use the side door." She whispered as Rachel led her towards the front porch.

"Do you have your keys?" Rachel took the key ring from Quinn's open palm and slid the metal into the lock. She pulled open the screen door, letting Quinn enter first. Lights illuminated a thin staircase, and the smell of vanilla perfume and pizza floated up from the apartment. "You're parents make you live in the basement?"

"No, I rent here." Quinn gripped the banister, kicking off the muddy, wet army boots and listening to them thump down the stairs. She peeled off the wet vest and dropped it as well, trying not to fall.

"Oh," That was all Rachel could say. She took off her wet jacket and laid it out on the chair to the desk. The tiny apartment looked cozy. There was a couch shoved against one wall with a television, a desk beside the stairs, a fridge, microwave and dresser. It was as though someone had condensed her house, and this was the result.

"You can stay here if you want. I really should shower." Quinn kept her head down as Rachel sat on the couch, picking up the remote for the TV. She wanted to disappear; Rachel shouldn't see how she lived.

"I'll wait for you then." Rachel switched on the TV, peeling off the wet top and flinging it on top of her jacket. "May I just borrow a top?"

"Of course," Quinn kept her head lowered as she searched through the dresser, pulling out the cleanest shirt she had and waiting for Rachel to put it on. She shouldn't even look at the brunette here, this place was too dirty, and she didn't want to get Rachel dirty too. "Don't come in the bathroom though, I don't actually have a door, just beads."

"Alright." Rachel felt the tension rise in the air. The couch cushion she was on was dripping with water, and she stood, ready to flip it when Quinn grabbed her wrist.

"Please don't do that. Just lie out blanket or something." Quinn murmured, turning white as a ghost. Rachel really couldn't see the opposite side of these cushions. She had never gotten them clean, and remnants of past nights were still stained on the fabric.

"Ok, Quinn, please relax. I'm not going to invade your privacy." Rachel sat down again as Quinn nodded sharply, and went into the bathroom. The beads shook as she passed by them and Rachel began flipping channels, unsure of what was on.

Quinn wished she could have a door to shut, but she didn't. The beads were glassy and thick, and she quickly jumped out of her clothes and into the shower. The water started pouring and she heard the pipes settle as the warm water flowed through. Her head still throbbed slightly, but it didn't hurt like it had before. She could hear the TV from here, and she silently prayed that Rachel wouldn't need to use the bathroom.

"Quinn!" she bit her lip nervously at Rachel's call, and quickly composed herself before answering.

"Yeah?" Her voice came out trembling and scared, and she cursed herself under her breath.

"Do you have anything to eat?" Rachel called into the bathroom, afraid to actually go in. Of course Quinn had a shower curtain and it seemed thick enough, but as much as she wanted to make sure Quinn was ok, she couldn't just waltz in.

"Yeah, open the fridge. I should have some fruit." Quinn called, scrubbing every inch of her body from head to toe. She poured half the bottle of shampoo on her scalp and scrubbed, cursing loudly every time her fingers ran over the bump on her crown. She washed everything off, practically seeing the pond scum run off her body and down the drain. She shut off the tap and grabbed the towel hanging on the rack beside the shower, still shivering. Her nerves were getting the best of her.

"May I come in?" Rachel's faint voice appeared from behind the curtain of beads, and Quinn nodded before finding her voice.

"Of course, yeah." She muttered nervously, and watched as Rachel entered, an apple core in her hand.

"It's a very nice apartment, especially for a teenager. Most can't scrape together enough money for rent." Rachel whispered, eying Quinn perched on the edge of the tub. The blonde was balling a portion of the towel together in her lap, and she saw a few faint read lines on the inside of her arms and on her upper back. "Quinn, are you feeling alright."

"Yeah, never better. Why do you ask?" Quinn motioned for Rachel to sit on the closed toilet lid, and looked at her fingernails, trying to avoid the brunette's eyes.

"Well, the lines on your arms and back… are you sure they don't hurt?" Rachel felt like crying when Quinn looking up at her for a brief second. The sadness in the blonde's eyes was more than she could take, and she quickly lowered her own. It was though Quinn was staring into her soul, the way the hazel orbs were boring into her.

"These things?" Quinn ran a finger over the scars on her arms and shook her head. "They're so old; I can't remember how I got them. They don't hurt anymore." Quinn whispered, hearing her own voice scream in her head for him to stop hitting her.

"We can talk about this. Quinn, I'm not going to judge you. If you're still getting hurt, I…" Rachel was cut off by Quinn standing up quickly, and turning her back to Rachel.

"I'm fine Rach, just drop it ok?" Quinn could hear her voice break, and she wiped away the flowing tears from her cheeks. If Rachel ever found out about her… about what was happening to her… she'd run so far and fast. Quinn didn't want that, she didn't want Rachel to ever leave her, and that meant hiding thing from her. Besides, the scars didn't hurt anymore. So she technically wasn't lying.

"Alright." Rachel stood up as well, and rested her head on Quinn's wet bare back. She put her arms around the blonde tightly, and felt the towel begin to soak her dry top. Quinn placed her fingers over Rachel's clasped ones, and Rachel felt the blonde's chest heave in quiet sobs. "I'm not going to ever leave you. I know you Quinn, you're afraid of being alone. I'm not going to ever leave you alone. And I want to help you. We're a couple and I… I love you."

Rachel mentally kicked herself for saying that. She probably just alienated the only person who ever paid her attention, but to her surprise, Quinn didn't run. The blonde turned around, and Rachel saw her bright red eyes and her rosy cheeks, wet with tears. Quinn hugged her tightly, the towel being pinned between them.

"I love you too Rachel," She whispered, her chin digging into the brunette's shoulder. Rachel's warm, comforting arms engulfed her, and she started crying again. Rachel shouldn't see her like this, weak and sickly, but she couldn't hold it in anymore. Someone loved her, actually loved her. Rachel loved her… "I love you so much…"

Rachel smiled as Quinn whispered the words, and she squeezed tightly, kissing Quinn's neck gently. "I'm not going anywhere. All I ask is that you be honest with me." Rachel whispered into Quinn's ear, and she felt the blonde nod against her cheek. "Now, let's get you dried off, and we can go get your car. Ok?"

Quinn let go of Rachel, smiling feebly at her and nodded, "Alright. Can you go get me a pair of clothes to wear though? Everything in here is wet." Quinn asked, watching Rachel's sad smile.

"Of course." Rachel went back into the other room, pulling open the doors to the dresser. Quinn loved her; Quinn had said she loved her. Rachel grinned like an idiot at those words. But Quinn was definitely hiding something, and Rachel desperately wanted to help her. She couldn't push Quinn away with constant questions however, and that meant letting Quinn open up to her at her own pace. _But that could take years._

Quinn quickly toweled off, and grabbed her underwear and bra out from under the bathroom sink. She quickly pulled on the red underwear, hastily tucking and slid on the bra. She examined herself in the mirror, and was satisfied to see no bulges in her panties. She had to face Rachel though; the brunette couldn't see all the scars that lined her lower back. The skin there would never been smooth again.

"Here," Rachel brushed back the beads and handed Quinn the wrinkled jeans and t-shirt. The blonde seemed so jumpy, and Rachel was afraid that she would withdraw completely. "I just grabbed whatever was in your dresser."

"Thanks." Quinn murmured, sliding on the clothing. She wanted to disappear completely, and she could tell Rachel was just as tense. She kept her eyes down as she tied back her hair.

"Aren't you going to dry your hair, its cold outside. You might get sick…" Rachel trailed off, realizing she was beginning to sound like a pest. Quinn's hand took hers, and she looked up at the blonde, seeing no trace of sadness from before.

"I was shoved in a pond, passed out, and walked here from that park soaked. I think a little run to my car with only wet hair isn't going to make me sick." Quinn smiled, kissing Rachel softly. She still wanted to cry, it was amazing that Rachel cared so much about her.

"If you're sure about that… I could always call my dad and have him pick up your car…" Rachel ignored the bruises as Quinn left the tiny bathroom, pulling her along. The blonde opened the door to what she assumed was the freezer, and pulled out a few ice packs.

"I know how much a black eye kills, so please ice it a little." Quinn handed her the ice pack, and she gently pressed it against her throbbing eye. She bit her lip at the slight stinging, but ultimately decided the coolness of the ice was better than nothing. "After we get my car, where do you want to go?"

"Let's just stay here for a little longer, watch a movie or something like that." Rachel whispered, intertwining her fingers with Quinn's. She needed time to give her dads a good excuse for why she was bruised. They had seen her slushied plenty of times before, but actual violence was foreign territory.

"Well, we could always watch Nightmare before Christmas, you could sing along with all the songs." Quinn smiled, and blushed as they headed back up the stairs, leaving the light on. She locked the door, and the two chatted quietly on the way back to get the car. The air was cooler, and night was falling. It was late, the moon was already high in the sky; 7 pm at least. Quinn clicked her key-chain, and the car's lights flashed.

"I knew you would suggest something like that." Rachel smiled, sitting in the cool car. She knew Quinn was still freezing, but she couldn't question the blonde's decisions. It was so nice to be in the car with her girlfriend, so relaxing, especially after the terrible day. Quinn turned on the radio, and the loud chords of Billy Talent played through the air.

"C'mon Princess, sing for me a little?" Quinn pouted, chuckling at the look she got from Rachel.

"I don't know the words to this. How can I sing along?" Rachel rolled her eyes as Quinn handed her the CD case.

"Lyrics are in there, just go along with it." Quinn tapped on the steering wheel, drumming along to Viking Death March. "Do you want me to start this again?"

"I don't care." Rachel skimmed through the booklet, and finally found out where they were in the song. She read over the lyrics, unaware of how violent Quinn's musical taste was. However, if it would comfort the blonde, she'd sing just about anything. "_Cracking the whip on the backs of the poor, we asked you to stop but you still wanted more," _

"_The blood on your hands left a trail as you crawl, down on your knees you just don't look so tall."_ Quinn joined in, trying to shove out the small voice of her younger self. Begging him to stop, the blood pooling on his hardwood desk…

"_Crosses still burn, axes still fall, down on your knees you just don't look so tall." _Quinn's heart stopped as they pulled in front of her house, and she saw the red Mercedes in the driveway…he couldn't be here, it was only… 8 pm. He couldn't be here. "Rach, can we just go to your house."

"Of course, but I don't have the movies you like. Just a lot of musicals." Rachel frowned, seeing the car in the driveway as well. She saw how Quinn stopped drumming to the song, and noticed how her knuckles turned as white as a baseboard. "Quinn, do you know that car?"

"No, it's probably friends of the owners… they have loud parties, I don't want to get another pounding headache." Quinn whispered, shaking her head. She felt horrible lying to Rachel, but she couldn't decide what was worse; letting the brunette know the truth, or just fake it. There was no way in hell Rachel, perfect sweet Rachel, was meeting that son of a bitch. She gunned it away from the house, and off to Rachel's house on the other side of the neighborhood. "I don't care what movies, you chose. I just want to hear your beautiful voice singing along."

-.-

_Quinn slings her backpack onto her shoulder and starts walking to her school. She doesn't want to go to school today; she knows everyone will laugh at her again. She doesn't like being in Michigan that much. She's sure it's nicer in other places in the state, but here, they don't like her. _

_Quinn feels the vampire fangs with her tongue, and opens her mouth big, like she's a vampire ready to kill someone. She doesn't like that thought, that she could kill someone. It scares her, thinking of death. Quinn pulls the black blanket over her shoulder again, it's still early morning and she's freezing. She had to get up early though; Father wouldn't let her dress up for Halloween and this way she can wear a costume. _

_She didn't bring Cinderella to school with her, like last year. She couldn't stand what they did to her last year. Quinn had to stay an hour after school looking for all of the doll's hidden limbs. She took Mother's walkman this morning too, and even though she's cold, the music is making her smile a little. _

_The school comes into view, and Quinn wishes it was a longer walk. She still has an hour and a half before the bell rings. She sits on the curb of the parking lot, and looks at herself in a cars chrome spinner. Her hair is slicked back with a lot of gel, and the fangs look good. She's wearing all black, like a vampire should, and her cape is keeping her warm. She'd make a good vampire though, the only time she spends time outside is under moonlight._

_She turns up the volume of the walkman, and watches as people start showing up. She sees the cars pull into the parking lot, and some parents actually kiss their kids goodbye before leaving. Quinn looks at the pavement, scuffing her shoes against the gravel. Father and Mother would never do that with her. _

"_Hi Quinn," The little blonde looks up at the voice and waves slightly to Jenna. Quinn doesn't really know her that well and Jenna's friends make fun of her so she doesn't say anything. She knows whatever she says would be mocked. _

_Quinn picks up a rock from the ground, it's not that big, and she throws it as hard as she can against the pavement. She finds another one, and slams it against the black asphalt. She wishes she has friends, and she doesn't know why she doesn't have any. They don't know the truth about her, what she really has; all they know is that Father is rich. _

_Quinn laughs at that. She doesn't have any money even though her class thinks she does. Father never buys her anything and she can't ask for anything without getting hit. Quinn's rubs her head slightly. Last night, he had hit her with the belt again, and he had done his 'new punishment'. Plus, he had smacked her with a lamp. On her head! Quinn wanted to cry. The small bump was covered by her slicked back hair, but it still stung like crazy._

_Looking at the schoolyard, Quinn stands up and begins to walk to her class's line. They always line up to go inside. Quinn stands at the back of the line, balling her cape in her hands. She doesn't feel brave, not like the past few days. She feels nervous and shaky, like something bad will happen. Father's new punishment is making her feel like this. It's not new anymore, it's been happening for months, but even she's noticed how she's changed. She doesn't like it, she's too quiet and she just wants to hide. She feels like she doesn't have any fight left. _

_Quinn goes into the school, and hangs her bag on her hook. She shoves her cape into her bag and pulls out her agenda and notebooks and pencil case. She zips up her backpack tightly, afraid that Nathan will put another bug in it like last Monday. She hates who she's sitting beside too, Alison and Nathan…her teacher doesn't like her, but that's no surprise. No one likes her. _

_Quinn slides into her seat and starts listening to the morning announcements, only standing for the National Anthem. She starts drawing little skeletons and bugs in her notebook while her teacher says what they're doing in the morning. Yay, art class. Quinn smiles, she loves art. _

_Everyone is given black sheet of paper, and packets of chalk. White and red and orange and green, all Halloween colours. Quinn says nothing as Alison hands the two piles right to Nathan and she asks her teacher for some paper and chalk. It's not worth it to fight. She starts drawing a girl, in a green dress. The girl is in an orange room, because there's no pink, and Quinn draws a red circle at the girl's feet. It's supposed to be blood. She colours the girl's face red too, and draws red streaks on her dress._

_She knows it's supposed to be her from last night. She was bleeding everywhere. Her back had gotten the belt, she was bleeding from behind, her arms had been cut and her head had bled from the lamp. She must've looked like a vampire last night, in their first bloodbath. _

"_What's that supposed to be?" Nathan pokes her hard, and she punches his shoulder back. "It looks weird and stupid."_

"_It's supposed to be a girl." Quinn says back, drawing red footsteps out to a door. _

"_Why is it red? Girl's aren't red stupid." Nathan says, and Quinn looks at his drawing of a pumpkin. _

"_She's bleeding. Like a demon. She's a weird demon and she's bleeding because a human hurt her." Quinn says, that's what she could be._

"_Well it's dumb." Nathan turns back to his pumpkin and Quinn nods. She raises her hand shyly and asks the teacher to go to the bathroom. She runs out the door and into the school. She hates being here, and she wants to go home. Father isn't home and neither is Mother; she could do whatever she wanted._

_Quinn pushes the door to the girl's bathroom and she goes into a stall; shutting its loose lock and sitting on the toilet seat. She can feel the tears running down her face, and she cries. Why does everyone hate her? Why can't she just have one friend? She doesn't want a ton of friends, just one. One person to tell her 'good job' or 'you're pretty'… just one…_

"_Quinn?" Quinn stiffens at her name, waiting to see who it is. "It's Alison; Ms. Abrams wants you back in class." She hears the slamming of doors, most likely Alison kicking them. All the students did that; practicing karate kicks against the bathroom doors was supposed to be fun. _

_Quinn pulled down her skirt, at least going to the bathroom one before she had to go back to class. "I'm coming, one moment." Quinn freezes, unsure of what to do. Jenna's ballerina shoes are outside her stall and she can't stand up now. "Just go and tell her I'm coming."_

"_She said for me to get you, I can't go back by myself." Alison leaves again to kick the doors and Quinn breathed. She slowly stands up, getting as close to the toilet as possible and relieves herself. She pulls up her skirt and leaves the bathroom, coming face to face with Alison. She always stood to use the toilets, especially in public bathrooms. She also had the ability to clear a room just by walking in; no one wanted to be with the loser. _

"_Why did you stand up to use the toilet?" Alison crosses her arms and Quinn backs away slowly, going around the raven haired girl to wash her hands._

"_What are you talking about?" Quinn lies, trying to control her breathing. _

"_I saw your shoes. You stood up to pee. Only boys do that, my mom told me so." Alison looks at her weird, "Are you a boy Quinn? You shouldn't be in here if you are. Why are you pretending to be a girl?" Alison releases a slew of questions, and Quinn balls the paper towel in her hands, trying to control her anger again. "You're such a freak."_

_Quinn turns around and slams Alison against the bathroom door. "I'm not a freak and I'm not a boy. So shut up about it!" _

_Alison looks at her angry. "I'm telling. I'm telling the teacher you slammed me, and I'm telling the class that you're a boy!" _

_Quinn throws her against the sinks, and runs out of the bathroom, running back to class. She's not going into class though, she's going home. She doesn't want to be here anymore, and now everyone will believe Alison and they'll think she's a boy. She's not a boy, she's a girl, and Father and Mother were told that after she was born. _

_Quinn runs past her bag and pushes the door to go outside. She runs out onto the yard and back into the parking lot. "I'm not going back, I'm not going back." Quinn whispers to herself as she runs home. She doesn't ever want to go back. Never, ever ever._

_She climbs up the trellis and into her bedroom again. She tosses herself on the bed, and grabs Cinderella, holding her tightly. "They found out Cinderella, they found out. Everyone knows about me. Alison saw, and she's gonna tell everyone." Quinn feels another rage build in her, and throws the doll across the room, slamming into her closet door. "I AM NOT A FREAK!" she grabs her pillow and throws it as hard as she can. "I'M NOT A FREAK!" she screams again, punching her mattress. It's stained pink._

"_I'm sorry Cinderella." Quinn grabs the doll and strokes its hair. "I'm so sorry I keep hurting you. I don't mean to…" Quinn hears her stomach growl, and she closes her eyes. Her snack is at school, and the kitchen door is locked. And the blanket…that blanket was from Father's study… she couldn't lose it! She had to go back… "I'll be right back Cinderella."_

_Quinn scurries down the trellis like a squirrel and runs back to school, determined to get the blanket back and run home again. She can't stay here long. She's not a freak… Alison's words still play through her head. Father tells her that too. But she's not a freak, and she isn't sick, and she isn't a boy. _

_She sees the kids have been let out for recess, and she bites her lip nervously. She hasn't realized how much it hurts to run until she stops, and now she feels a burning on her backside. Quinn goes into the main doors, away from the kids playing soccer and jump-rope; just get the blanket and get out. Halloween sucks. _

_She goes to her classroom, and grabs her backpack. The bell rings. Quinn doesn't know which way her class is coming in today, and she runs in the opposite direction, right into Nathan. _

"_Quinn, you actually had the guts to come back here?" the boy laughs, and his friends surround her. _

"_Shut up. I'm going home." Quinn growls, holding her backpack. One boy grabs her arms and pins them to her back, another takes her bag. She tries kicking, and she hates how he grabbed her wrists. They just laugh._

"_Alison told us what she saw." Nathan says, "Is it true Quinn, are you a boy?" _

"_No, I'm not!" Quinn spits out, digging her sneakers into the linoleum floor as Nathan comes closer. She lets out a gasp of pain as Nathan kicks her between the legs. She wants to cry as he does it again and again. "Stop that!" She tries to break free from the boys, but they surround her. _

"_You are a boy! Girls don't get hurt when they get hit there." Nathan laughs, and Quinn feels the boys let go of her wrists. She picks up her backpack from the floor, trying to balance on wobbly legs. She's dizzy with pain, and she wants to burst into tears, curling into a ball right here. "You make a lousy boy, boys don't cry." _

_She punches him, right in the face. Quinn feels his teeth dig across her knuckles, but she doesn't care. "I'm not a boy, and you make a terrible one." Quinn punches him again, shoving him against the hooks. "See, you're crying too. You're on your knees with pain." She screams, trying to be loud. She wants the pain to stop and she can barely walk, but she has to get away._

"_Ms Abrams!" one of the boys shouts in the class, and Quinn runs. She doesn't want to get in trouble. "Ms Abrams! Quinn hurt Nathan!" Quinn runs past Alison on her way out, and doesn't stop crying. Her front hurts and her back hurts. There's burning pain all over her body and she's struggling to stay upright. _

_She turns the corner onto her street, and collapses on the road. She can't breathe from crying, and she can barely see through her tears. Why was there so much pain? She tries standing again, but the pain in her front is making her legs shake. She tries dragging herself across the ground to her house, but she scrapes her knees through the black leggings. _

"_Why?" Quinn curls in a ball at the top of her driveway, trying to breathe. "Why me? What did I ever do to deserve this?" No one on the street was here. She was actually the only child on the street; all the other homeowners were working people. "What did I do that was so bad?" She whispers through clenched teeth, finally standing upright. "I was born. Is that a crime?" _

-.-

Santana lay on Puck's bed, waiting for him to finish up. She really felt nothing with this meaningless sex, but wasn't that how it was supposed to be? Whatever, she really didn't care. Puck was her boyfriend, and this was what couples did. They fucked.

"Are you happy now?" She whispers as he climbs off her, pulling on his pants.

"Oh yeah, I'm good." Puck leans over and kisses her, a big wet puppy kiss. Santana rolled her eyes and smiled. "How about you?"

"Good, could you just drop me off at Brittany's? I promised her a movie night tonight, and my things are already there." Santana stood up, pulling on her jeans. She didn't want to be here anymore, it was dull, dark and uninteresting.

"Sure babe." Puck grabbed his keys are left the room, leaving Santana to huff. He couldn't even wait for her? Really? One great boyfriend she has. Santana grabbed her purse, and jacket, rushing out the bedroom and down the stairs, hoping to avoid anyone who was in the house.

The autumn air was chilled, and night covered the sky. Santana climbed into Puck's car, cursing him slightly under her breath. Some music was playing, but she wasn't sure what type exactly, and she shut it off immediately.

"What was that for?" Puck turned it back on, annoyed and Santana shut it off again,

"I have a bit of a headache; just drop me off at Brittany's." Santana grumbled, rubbing her shoulder. Berry had actually put up a fight, and she had managed to get a good hit on the Latina. "I can't believe RuPaul actually fought back."

"Yeah, so did Fabray. You should've seen what she was doing. It's like she's had practice." Puck responded, drumming against the steering wheel as he drove around the neighborhood.

"You managed to knock her out though. And she was breathing when we left her." Santana said, trying to edge out the possibilities of what could've happened to Blondie. Her dad was a surgeon at Lima general, she did know what could happen if someone took a serious thump to the head.

"She'll be fine. Chill out a little babe." Puck was so relaxed about this. Santana sometimes wished she could be that relaxed, about everything. She was so fucking stressed sometimes; she didn't know what to do with herself. "And here is your stop. See you tomorrow?"

"You know it." Santana kissed Puck quickly, and got out of the car. She waved as he pulled away, and ran up the stairs to Brittany's house. None of the lights were on, and Santana groaned. Brittany was probably in her room, with the stereos blaring. Santana would have to yell to get in. The blonde's parents were visiting relatives' two towns over, and her younger brother was gone for the night.

"Britt!" Santana pounded on the door, hoping Brittany might notice she was out here. "Brittany, open up! It's me!" Santana kicked the door, knowing that usually got Brittany's attention, but still nothing… great. It was freezing outside, and her parents weren't even home. She was either stuck outside of her house, or outside Brittany's house.

Santana reluctantly pulled out her phone, dialing Brittany's number. Voice mail. Really? Brittany had voicemail? Santana wouldn't know, considering the blonde always answered her calls. So she tried again… and again. By the fifth time she was ready to give up when Brittany finally decided to answer.

"Hello?" the blonde sounded out of breath, and Santana instantly got worried.

"Britt, where are you? I've been calling for 15 minutes." Santana growled, "Are you ok?"

"I'm fine, why?" Brittany sounded happy, and Santana heard voices in the background.

"You sound out of breath. Anyways, come downstairs. I'm at the door." Santana pulled out her watch again, and exhaled, wishing it was earlier in the evening.

"About that… I'm not home now…" Brittany trailed off, like she knew that Santana's jaw had dropped about 10 feet.

"Well, where are you? It's freezing out here, and I don't have my keys." Santana grumbled, kicking pebbles off of Brittany's driveway.

"I'm at Rachel's." Brittany responded innocently.

"Why the fuck are you at Rachel's on a Saturday night?" Santana was pissed. Why the hell would Brittany go to RuPaul's tonight? They had plans for an all night movie marathon, and maybe something more…

"I saw you get into Puck's car after you left. That's not a family drama thing San, you lied." Brittany turned away from the phone and Santana heard Quinn's voice laughing in the background. At least she didn't have to worry about a murder charge. "I thought you were going to spend the night with him. And Rachel called me and invited me for a movie night. Quinn picked me up about 2 hours ago. We're picking the second movie."

Great, now the blonde sounded upset, and Santana felt guilty. She had really never heard Brittany sound this heartbroken, and she had been with the blonde through everything. Santana sighed; she would never break plans with Brittany, never. The blonde didn't know that.

"I wouldn't break plans with you Britt…" Santana trailed off, hearing Brittany turn away to speak to the other girls. "Britt, are you listening?"

"Of course San, we're just deciding on another movie." The sound of DVD's clattering on the floor came through the phone, and Santana felt the anger bubble a little. Brittany was supposed to be here, with her; not at Berry's with Fabray. Of all people to hang out with…

"Britt, could you just come here. Please, I'll make the night worthwhile..." Santana offered, trying to sound sultry, and she heard laughing in the background.

"San, the phone is on speaker. Don't suggest that." Brittany giggled too, and Santana kicked the side of the house hard, wincing at the stinging in her foot.

"Why didn't you tell me that!?" Santana screeched, and felt guilty… again. Brittany knew how to control her.

"Because Lopez, Britt isn't your slave, she doesn't have to tell you every goddamn thing." Santana saw red at Quinn's voice, and tried to calm herself down. She had managed to make Blondie shake hands with death, and it was like nothing had changed.

"Quinn's right San, I can have my own life. Besides, after what you did to her today, you can spend a little time outside." Santana pulled her jacket tighter around her, and shivered in the air. She wanted to cry, Brittany sounded disappointed and heartbroken… and she had caused it. "Why would you do that San?"

"Britt, I didn't know you would find out…" Santana sucked in her breath. Not the best thing to tell Brittany, and she heard a whimper in the blonde's voice as she spoke.

"San, I thought I could trust you…" Brittany was on the verge of tears, she could hear it, and she felt like crying herself.

"Of course you can trust me Britt…" Santana tried to get the words out, but choked on most of them.

"That was just mean San, and you can't make an excuse why. You lied to me and you almost killed Quinn. I'm staying here tonight, you can get your things and stay at my house, but I'm not going to come." Brittany sounded pissed off too. Santana knew she subconsciously tried to treat Brittany like a possession, and she felt the tears run hot down her face.

"The door's locked, how do you expect me to get in?" Santana whispered. If she spoke louder, she'd probably cry.

"You know where the spare key is." Brittany laughed at something Santana couldn't hear, and she came back on the line. "And Rachel said under different circumstances, she'd drive me home, but I don't think you and Quinn should meet again today."

Santana sighed, trying to blink back the tears. "Alright Britt. What time are you coming home tomorrow then?"

"I don't know; whenever I get a ride. After breakfast for sure." Brittany said, and there was more laughter in the background. "I'll see you tomorrow though San, have a good night."

"Night Britt…" Santana trailed off, shutting the phone and dropping it into her pocket. She had forgotten about the spare key, and she rooted around the flowerpot for about 5 minutes before digging it up.

The Pierce household looked eerie in the dark. It was so quiet, and Santana's crying seemed to echo through the hallways. Instinctively, she locked the door, and went up to Brittany's room. Her overnight bag was lying on the floor, but the room looked empty without Brittany's smiling face lying on the bed, and Labyrinth playing on the TV.

Santana silently changed into a set of pajamas and shut the door, lying on Brittany's bed. She started flipping channels, watching various infomercials, debating about whether or not she should call Brittany again.

God, this bed was too empty without the blonde, and Santana felt like she was all out of tears. Her face and ribs hurt from crying, and the only sound was some overly happy music from the TV. Karma fucking sucked. She had believed that she was invincible, no one messed with her. Fabray had proven that wrong. She thought she could get away with anything, and Brittany had just showed her how much of an idiot she was.

Revenge? Yeah, she got it. She made Fabray fear for her life today, and now she felt empty as hell because Brittany hated what she had done. She rolled over, hugging the pillow and inhaling Brittany's scent. Big mistake. She burst into a fresh round of tears, and hugged it tighter, wishing it was the blonde.

Fuck, she was so stupid… so, so stupid…


	7. Rest Calm

**Hi everyone, so I finally managed to finish this next chapter, between all my English assignments. Hope it's to your liking. I want to thank everyone who's subscribed to this story, favourited it, and reviewed. Honestly, thank you all so much for reviews. They make my day.**

**So, that's about it really. the beginning of this chapter is fluff, but it's dark as well. I tried exploring more from Brittany's POV too, ,so please review, let me know what you all think.  
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**Glee finally started! so excited! but I suspect Brittana won't last, and I'm sad about that :( but fanfiction always makes up for the actual show.  
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**Warning! child abuse... that's about it.  
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**Enjoy!  
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* * *

Quinn rolled out of bed the next morning, still wearing last nights clothes. Her head was pounding, and she tried to remember what drinks she had last night before remembering the bump on her crown. She instinctively reached up, and winced at the shoot pain.

Why was she even at Rachel's house? She turned around to see Rachel fast asleep in a pair of pink pajama pants and a white tank top, and Brittany lying on a mound of pillows past the foot of the bed. The TV was shut, and she couldn't remember who turned it off. She smiled; Rachel and Britt had started debating what movie to watch, Labyrinth or something with Streisand in it. That was true entertainment.

The bowl of chips was on the floor beside Brittany, and candy wrappers and pop cans were on Rachel's beside table. Quinn grabbed the phone beside a busted can, and quietly made her way into the bathroom. She yawned, and stretched; turning back to face the bedroom before closing the door. She giggled a little, and shut the door.

Rachel had offered pajamas to sleep in last night; although Quinn had declined, Brittany accepted and now the taller blonde looked like a giant in pajamas two sizes two small. She locked the door, and sat on the toilet lid, waiting for the slight dizziness to subside.

She remembered why she was really here. He had been at her apartment. It was totally out of schedule, and Quinn bit on her lip nervously again. The thought of him and Rachel meeting made her sick to her stomach. He would hurt Rachel, she was sure of that. She quietly dialed her phone, waiting for answer.

"Hello, Fabray residence Judy speaking." Quinn sucked in her breath as Mother answered the phone, and she froze for a second. "Hello?"

"Where was Father last night?" Quinn blurted out. She needed to know if he drove around the neighborhood, looking for her. If he had seen her car across the street from Rachel's house… god, she didn't want to put the brunette in any danger.

"He left early because he had a 9 o'clock flight to New York City; he's gone for the week." Judy said coolly, and Quinn wanted to reach through the phone to punch her pompous Mother. The news set in fast though, and she grinned.

"Are you joking?" Quinn felt like giggling. She didn't have to worry about him for a damn week. Of course she still would, and she'd have a near heart attack when he came back, but still… a week without pain…

"Why would I joke about that Quinn?" Judy spoke again, a little softer this time. Quinn felt tears well in her eyes, and she bit her lip.

"I don't know. You're a natural born liar, we all are." Quinn spat out, still happy about his business trip. "But thank you for that information." She shut her phone, smiling softly. The pain in her head was stopping, but she felt like she might faint.

Back into the bedroom she went, sitting on the edge of the bed as Rachel slept. She smiled, gently brushing away a strand of dark hair away from her face. The brunette stirred slightly, but kept sleeping. God, she looked so peaceful when she slept. Quinn gently kissed Rachel's softly cheek, making the brunette shuffle again.

Finally lying down next to the sleeping girl, Quinn hugged her tightly, breathing in Rachel's intoxicating scent and she smiled when Rachel yawned. "Good morning beautiful." She whispered, feeling Rachel's fingers trail the edge of her shirt's collar.

"Good morning," Rachel smiled, leaning her head on Quinn's chest again. "I didn't realize you spent the night."

"I know, you fell asleep after the third movie and me and Britt played a few rounds of fluffy bunny." Quinn laughed, kissing Rachel's forehead gently again. She could easily stay this way forever, just lying here. Quinn rolled onto her back, pulling Rachel closer to her. "You slept well then?"

"Of course," Rachel fingered the edge of Quinn's jeans; glad they didn't do anything last night. She knew it was much too soon to be thinking of sex, and especially after yesterday's incidents. "You were here." She smiled as Quinn's fingers ran gently through her hair. "You should stay over more often,"

"How's your eye?" Quinn whispered, still tired. She had no idea where Rachel's dads were, and Britt was still fast asleep on the floor.

"It throbs, but I can still see out of it. Just some bruising." Rachel turned over, facing Quinn. She closed her eyes, exhausted. All that sugar and very little sleep really made her tired; she doubted anything would get done today. "How's your head?"

"It's fine. Just a small headache." Quinn whispered, smiling at Rachel's peaceful face. "I told you I'd be fine."

"I'm going to have to tell my dads about why I have a black eye though," Rachel whispered. She knew she would tell the truth to her fathers, and she wasn't sure how Quinn would react to this.

"What are you going to say to them?" Quinn whispered, feeling herself tense at the words. She couldn't have some cops come interrogate her. She couldn't complain; she was bred not to.

"I'm going to tell them Santana beat me up. What would you like me to say to them?" Rachel said innocently. "I know you don't want me to mention you, Quinn, and I know you well enough to not fight with you." Rachel felt a pit form in her stomach, and opened her eyes to the blonde's warm smile again. Quinn was so hurt, and Rachel desperately wanted to help.

"Tell them whatever you want Rach." Quinn stiffened and relaxed at Rachel's words. She couldn't be brought to police attention; she couldn't be shoved in foster care at 16; she had already survived this long.

"So I can tell them what Puck did to you?" Rachel looked at Quinn's solemn face and saw the hazel orbs flash at her. Quinn was doing a god job of hiding whatever anger and sadness she had pent up.

"No, just leave me out of it. It happened, it's over. Just keep me out of it. Lopez won't bring it up, and you won't bring it up." Rachel went rigid under Quinn's touch and she immediately regretted how harsh she sounded. So demanding… so angry… "Rach, just please don't talk about me. Ok?"

Rachel bit the inside of her cheek nervously and nodded, her cheek brushing against the rough black cloth. "Fine."

"Thanks," Quinn leaned forward, kissing the top of Rachel's head. She hugged the small brunette tightly, not wanting to break the position. If Rachel said anything about her… she would run… she hated thinking that way, especially because for the first time in her life, she didn't feel so damn empty. She couldn't remember the last time she had felt loved, and with Rachel… it was such a constant feeling that she couldn't let anything jeopardize it.

Rachel waited for Quinn's arms to wrap protectively around her, and she smiled softly as the blonde pulled her up, the top of her head brushing against Quinn's cheek. She wanted Quinn to be ok. She had woken up as the blonde was asleep last night, and she noticed how Quinn seemed so stiff right before she curled away from Rachel. Quinn had curled into a ball, and Rachel knew it was something deeper than what had happened at the park.

Last night, Rachel had woken up in the middle of the night, and tried pulling Quinn closer to her. She had honestly thought the first time Quinn spent the night, the blonde would be holding her. Yet Quinn had whimpered when Rachel had tried to touch her, or tried to show some affection. She heard those whimpers and small sobs ring in her head like bells, echoing.

"Why don't we wake up Brittany and get some breakfast?" Rachel whispered, still hearing the whimpers ring faintly. She smiled as Quinn rolled her eyes. "What?"

"Nothing, I just wanted some time alone with you." Quinn held Rachel tighter. "Just… damn, I don't know how to say this without sounding all sappy…"

"Just say it." Rachel smiled, inhaling the faint smell of vanilla perfume.

"Can't I just hold you for a little?" Quinn whispered, blushing. She sounded like a fucking romantic comedy, and she hated it. "Like, just lie here a little without any interruptions?"

"Why do you want to do that?" Rachel knew the answer, but she wanted to see how far Quinn was willing to take this romantic language.

"Because I love having you in my arms, that's why. So please be quiet and let's enjoy this for a second." Quinn felt Rachel lean in towards her more, and she held the brunette as tightly as possible. Quinn wanted to say more, but she didn't know how to speak from her heart. She knew Rachel had no idea how much she meant to her, and Rachel probably would never understand it. Whatever, Quinn was fine like this. Why couldn't this be one of the memories that kept popping up?

"I love you Quinn," Rachel whispered, wanting to freeze time altogether. If she could hold Quinn, and wipe away all the blonde's terrible memories, she would think life to be perfect.

To freeze time would be a nice ability, but she didn't have that. To somehow manage to keep Quinn with her all the time would be better, but she knew she couldn't do that. Talk about being clingy. She knew she was Quinn's Princess, and she loved that nickname; she especially loved hearing the words come from Quinn.

The bedroom had gotten quiet, and their breathing fell into sync. Quinn closed her eyes, happy to just relax like this. Rachel snuggled against her, keeping the child-like grin on her face. It had to be early in the morning, because the sun just beginning to hit the edge of the blinds.

It was alright though, because, with the exception of Brittany still sleeping at the foot of the bed, this was exactly what Quinn wanted. To love, and to be loved; that was so damn true. Quinn could feel Rachel's body getting heavier, and she slowly opened her eyes to see that the brunette had fallen back asleep. She smiled, and kissed Rachel's forehead gently before trying to fall asleep again herself.

-.-

Brittany blinked her eyes a few times, and sat up slowly, unsure if the other two were still asleep. She rubbed her eyes, trying to wake up, and when she looked on the bed, she saw Quinn hugging Rachel tightly, like she was never going to let go.

Brittany smiled softly, she wished Santana cared about her that much. She looked down at the pillow she was hugging and picked at the frayed ends. Santana had held her that tight maybe once, and it was on her birthday when she was crying. Santana always seemed like she wanted to be in a relationship, but she always confused Brittany. The Latina flipped so easily, and Brittany never knew what she did wrong.

The room was so quiet, only Quinn and Rachel's synchronized breaths were there. Brittany slowly braided the fringed edges of the pillow, wondering if Rachel's dads were home. She didn't know if she should tell them about what happened yesterday. Maybe Rachel should tell them, if they were home. Brittany heard the stairs creaking slowly, and voices through the closed bedroom door, and nodded. Well, they were home.

She couldn't believe that Santana had actually organized that. She didn't think it was all Puck or even any Puck at all. Santana knew how to get people to do what she wanted; Brittany dropped the pillow for a second before pulling it closer. She sort of knew that Santana used her half the time, but she never wanted to believe it because she was still in love with the Latina.

What if Santana got away with this? Brittany really would feel bad if that happened. Her friends were almost killed by her crush; talk about a conflict of emotions. If she told Rachel's dads, Santana could go to prison. If she didn't tell Rachel's dads… well, there might be a fight to the death between Quinn and Santana at some point. Plus, Quinn might try and get even, and then Quinn would go to jail. So either way, someone could go to jail.

Brittany noticed her hand getting tingly as she gripped the pillow in thought. She could've consulted with Lord Tubbington, that cat was so smart sometimes. What would he say in this situation? Brittany thought about this for another while before determining that he would tell Rachel's dads about what happened. Brittany smiled; Lord Tubbington really didn't like Santana but he did like to scratch her.

She stood up quietly, and stretched, hearing her back pop and crack with every twist. She looked down at the super short pajama shorts and the small sweater. It looked like everything had been put in the laundry and then shrunken. Wow, Brittany never knew Rachel was this small until she tried on the brunette's clothes. She gripped the pillow tightly, pretending it was her cat.

The hallway was really pretty when she went into it. She hadn't really noticed last night because the three had just run into Rachel's bedroom to see who would pick the first movie. The sun was coming through a window, and it must be almost lunch. She smiled as she stepped on the warm spots on the floor, her feet freezing. She didn't have blanket last night.

Every step she took, she seemed to lose whatever spunk she had gathered. What if Rachel and Quinn stopped being her friends because she told her dads? Then she wouldn't have any of her friends. Everyone called her stupid or laughed at her, and it was always upsetting. Brittany sucked in her breath and started going down the stairs. She couldn't let Santana get away with almost murder.

The voices were again in the kitchen, and Brittany held the pillow to her chest, really pretending it was Lord Tubbington. What if they didn't believe her? They'd think she was lying and then they'd laugh and call her stupid too. No, parents didn't do that, right? Well, that's not true. She once remembered seeing a dad call his daughter stupid and sick at an airport, but that was probably a one time thing.

"Good morning Brittany," She looked up at Mr. Berry, or one of the Mr. Berry's. She knew last night they told her to call them Leroy and Hiram, but she couldn't remember who was who. She was really tired until she had that big bottle of Coke.

"Good morning," She said, smiling slowly. This Mr. Berry was shorter, with tan skin. He must be Rachel's dad, because the other Mr. Berry was tall and pale. The friendly one must be Leroy, he had energy last night. The other one nodded at her, drinking some coffee and reading the paper. Her dad did that too! Santana always used to say how Rachel and her dads weren't normal, but this looked pretty normal to her. Someone cooking breakfast and someone eating it. Santana was wrong a lot, she noticed.

"You're up early, what would you like for breakfast?" Leroy, yes, it was Leroy, smiled at her, frying something in a pan. Brittany thought it was bacon, and it smelled so good.

"Whatever you're cooking is fine." She held the pillow tightly, playing again with the frayed ends and looking up slowly at the other Mr. Berry, Hiram, sitting at the table.

"You're certainly an early riser; we could hear you three at 4 in the morning still wide awake." Brittany shrugged as he spoke to her, she really didn't know what to say. "So Quinn and Rachel are still asleep?"

"Yes sir," She said softly, shaking a little. She really had to tell them before she didn't want to anymore, but this was scaring her a little. She really didn't know what Rachel would think, or Quinn. She really liked having more friends. "Mr. Berry, I have to tell you something." Brittany blurted out quickly, her heart pounding so loud she could hear it in her ears.

"Alright," Hiram looked at her with an eyebrow raised, like he was trying to hear something. Brittany knew what it was; she wasn't stupid with some things.

"It's not about Quinn and Rachel, well… it is, but they aren't doing anything now. I guess they're sleeping, but that doesn't count. It happened yesterday." Brittany rushed out, seeing she now had Leroy's attention as he took the pan off the stove and turned to her.

"And what were they doing yesterday that you know about?" Hiram said again, and Brittany wanted to blush. He probably thought that all teenagers had one thing on their mind.

"Not anything you're thinking about." Brittany quivered. "It had to do with Santana Lopez and Noah Puckerman."

"Oh lovely. We're quite familiar with that Lopez girl; we've had too many incidents involving her and a frozen drink." Leroy said in place of his husband. He looked worried, and Hiram just looked angry. They knew about Santana, even better. She was probably going to go to prison now. "Well, what happened?"

Brittany looked at the ground. She felt like she was betraying her best friend, but Santana never helped her lots either. Well, the Latina did a lot elementary school, but in high school all Santana did was drag her along. Quinn and Rachel had been nicer to her in one night than Santana had been in 3 years of high school. She didn't feel as bad anymore. "Mr. Berry, I think you should sit down." She whispered, and looked up shyly as Leroy looked worried, setting the pan on the counter and sitting at the kitchen table.

Brittany saw how he took Hiram's hand, like she was about to tell them someone died. They looked like her parents did when they were told her brother had died. They were like every other couple; Santana was really wrong.

"Spit it out girl, don't just stand there." Hiram said, and Brittany quickly stood in front of them, hugging the pillow.

"Yesterday, Quinn and Rachel went to a park, and Santana and Puck followed them there, and Puck grabbed Quinn and held her underwater until she couldn't breath. Rachel said she passed out. Santana made Puck do it, and then she started punching Rachel, and she hurt them both…" Brittany stopped to breathe; still looking at the tile floor before going on. "Santana and Puck left them there, and Rachel managed to get Quinn to wake up again, and they went to Quinn's house to clean off because Quinn couldn't drive well. She still has a lump on her head from being hit. Rachel's probably going to come downstairs with bruises too, Santana punched her a lot…"

Brittany looked up finally, seeing a shocked look on Leroy's face, and just anger on Hiram's. Both men were speechless, and Brittany felt like she had done something horrible. "Why didn't those two tell us? Or call the police when it happened? Brittany… how do you know this?"

"Please, listen to me. I'm telling the truth. Quinn didn't want Rachel to call the police. I don't know why, but she didn't want her too. Rachel didn't get hurt as bad, so she left the decision up to Quinn to call the cops." Brittany tried to stop the Berry men from doubting her. Even worse, they could get Rachel in trouble because she didn't tell someone, but Brittany knew Rachel was loyal to Quinn. "I wasn't there, Santana lied to me and left me at my house when she met with Puck…"

"Why wouldn't Quinn want to call the police?" Both men looked stunned and shocked and just… speechless. Leroy looked like he wanted to start crying. Brittany could see raw emotion on his face, definitely Rachel's dad.

"I don't know, she just didn't. She was more worried about Rachel then herself." Brittany gripped the pillow. "I don't know if they were gong to tell you, but Santana shouldn't get away with this."

"Well that's an understatement. That little brat is lucky I don't go over to her house and knock her out myself." Hiram was gripping the coffee mug so tightly; his knuckles were as white as snow. They both looked shocked and angry, and Brittany really didn't know what to do.

The kitchen went quiet at the sound of footsteps on the stairs, and Rachel's laugh. Brittany sucked in her breath as Hiram stood up. She looked up at him, and she was one of the taller kids; and right now, he scared her. She quickly moved out of his way, and leaned on the kitchen table. She didn't feel like breakfast anymore.

"Rachel, Quinn, come here for a moment." He called, and the two quickly came into the kitchen. Rachel was smiling about something, and Quinn was rubbing her eyes with one hand; Rachel was holding the other.

"Good morning Dad, good morning Daddy." She gave Hiram a quick kiss on the cheek, and Brittany shook a little when she noticed a purple bruise on Rachel's cheek, half covered by makeup. Quinn looked bruised too. Both looked like rag dolls, tossed in the laundry and shaken.

"Rachel, what's on your face?" He said, trying not to scare off the two. Brittany sat down at the table, trying to keep calm. She had just sent Santana to prison… Rachel couldn't hide bruises, and she would never blame Quinn for them.

"It's nothing Daddy, just a small bruise I got at the park yesterday." Rachel said, still holding Quinn close to her. Quinn looked suddenly awake, and she squeezed Rachel's hand gently. Brittany wanted to cry, Santana used to do that with her when she was really upset, way back in elementary school.

"It was from Santana Lopez, correct?" Leroy piped up, and Rachel and Quinn looked more alert than they had all night. Brittany had seen them both on sugar highs, and she never knew Quinn could dance so well, or do a back flip over the bed. Even with all that sugar, eyes still looked glassy. Now they were wide awake.

Rachel didn't say anything, but she looked at Brittany with pleading eyes. Brittany felt like she had done something really bad, but she knew she didn't. She couldn't let Santana get away with this, and Santana was a big bully yesterday.

"Rachel, Brittany told us everything that happened at the park yesterday." Hiram turned around, sitting back down with the cup of coffee. "Please, sit down. We're not going to do anything, we just want to talk."

Quinn looked like she was about to cry as she sat down, holding Rachel's hand underneath the table, and Brittany didn't know why. Quinn looked like she had done something wrong, like she was about to be in big trouble. Every move Hiram did, Quinn trembled. She shied away from the men, acting strange.

"Why didn't you girls say anything about this yesterday?" Hiram quietly, and Brittany felt really uncomfortable sitting at this table. She felt like she was interrupting something important. So she started picking at the fringe on the pillow again, crossing her legs on the chair and looking down at the fabric.

"I didn't want her to say anything," Quinn said quietly, and everyone looked at her. "I didn't want her to say anything because I didn't want anyone to know what happened. I got hurt, but I'm fine now. I don't need to dwell on what happened." Quinn spoke softly, and Brittany could see Rachel gripping her hand under the table.

"Why not? Quinn, what if you're seriously hurt? You have a lump on your head from being hit?" Leroy said softly, like he was afraid to cry. Brittany didn't know why Quinn was so secretive, but even at school she was like this. She never wanted to tell anyone anything, Rachel was the exception.

"It's fine; I've been hit on the head before. I've gotten smacked in the face with a baseball a few times before. I spilt open my nose when I hit the balance beam in gymnastics after a flip. I can take a hit." Quinn said, and Rachel looked at her. Brittany knew that look; she gave it to Santana all the time. It said 'you're lying and I know it, so why are you doing it'.

"Quinn…" Rachel started, but the blonde stopped her before she could finish.

"Rach, I was more concerned about you, but you said you were fine. I don't want anything too bad to happen, I don't want people involved." Quinn said again, she was so secretive it was killing everyone at the table.

Hiram and Leroy looked at each other. Brittany knew that look too. They knew Quinn was keeping something secret, and they knew she wasn't going to say anything. Brittany played with the frayed ends of the pillow, her knuckles turning white from picking at the strands so fiercely. Quinn didn't like to tell the truth, Brittany noticed. The truth scared Quinn a lot.

"Rachel, we are going to call Santana's parents, and tell what she did to you." Hiram said, clearly speaking on behalf of the emotional Leroy. "Now Quinn, are you going to tell your parents about this incident, or would you like us to mention it for them?"

Quinn blushed, and shook her head quickly. "I'll tell them for sure. Trust me. You just tell Santana's parents about what she did to Rachel. I promise to tell my parents." Brittany could practically see Quinn crossing her fingers. She should make Quinn pinky promise to tell her parents about what happened. It wasn't fair that Quinn wouldn't get help. She deserved it too.

"Alright," Leroy stood up first, leaving the room hastily, and Rachel watched him leave, the other heads still focused down on the table top. Hiram soon stood up and followed, placing plates of food on the hardwood table before leaving as well.

"Have a good morning girls, I think we'll have some business to take care of." Hiram said, following his husband out of the room and up the stairs. The three just looked at the plates, Brittany's nails still picking at the fabric of the pillow.

Finally, Rachel picked up the fork and started eating some of the fruit on her plate. Quinn looked paler than Brittany had ever seen her, and she was looking at the bacon and pancakes, but she felt sick.

"Britt, why did you have to tell them?" Quinn looked at her, and she swallowed nervously. Quinn didn't look angry or anything, just really scared.

"Because Santana shouldn't get away with it." Brittany said softly, taking a bite of the food on her plate. Rachel rested her head on her palm, wincing slightly at the pressure. Under the sunlight, Brittany could really see all the concealer she had used. Rachel never wore that much makeup, unless they were performing.

Quinn sat on the chair, crossing her legs silently. She knew Brittany was trying to help, but this… this was just too much. She never told anyone what she had gone through, and she could easily hide anything done to her. She was like some lizard, just growing back whatever had been severed. She picked at the food slowly, taking a bite of the flavourful pancakes, and feeling them land like a rock in her stomach. "Britt, just don't mention me next time, ok?"

"Well the point of her telling my dads anything was in hope that there won't be a next time." Rachel whispered, still looking at Quinn, analyzing the blonde's moves.

"I can handle myself…" Quinn trailed off, really not wanting to say much.

Brittany hugged the pillow, eating the pancakes, wishing that the mood would lighten. She didn't like how no one was talking again. It was too quiet. It reminded her of the mornings with Santana. Those stupid silent mornings when Santana would wake up, look at her, and leave; just like that.

"Look, let's just finish this and we can go out somewhere. Do something. Forget about this huge mess, ok?" Quinn looked up at both Rachel and Brittany, and she tried to smile a little, still shell-shocked.

"Sure," Brittany smiled at her, and saw Quinn offer a small smile back. She looked so scared, like she had done something wrong. Brittany watched as Quinn slowly ate; she was acting like someone would take away the food. Brittany looked down, eating her own pancakes, wondering what was wrong.

-.-

_Quinn sits on her bed, her backside burning from where Father had just been. She doesn't want to be in pain anymore, she's sick of it, and she's downright tired of always hurting. If it wasn't her backside, it was her back, or her arm, or her front; it was always something. _

_She stands up gently, tugging on her underpants and a pair of jeans. She makes sure they are the birthday gift jeans, because those ones were a little bigger than normal. That's why Father always makes her wear dresses and skirts and such, so no one would be able to tell what she really had. She bites on her lip tightly as she struggles to pull on the jeans. This really hurts, like a burning pain and she doesn't know why. It's in her front too. _

_The door slowly opens, and Quinn blinks against the light to see Mother standing in the doorway. Quinn hangs her head; after Father's 'punishments', Mother usually doesn't want to talk to her, or look at her or anything. She's always a disappointment in some way. _

"_Mother," Quinn whispers softly and quickly takes Mother's hand, trying to ignore the burning sensation running down her front. She clings to Mother's arm, afraid to let go; she knows she'll get slapped for doing this, but she already hurts so much. "I don't feel well." _

_Judy normally would pay no attention to Quinn, but she never complained about being ill. This is bad. She puts her palm to Quinn's forehead, looking at the child's flushed cheeks and sighs. "You have a fever Quinn; find a blanket and a cold compress." _

"_But Mother, it burns…" Quinn says, taking a step as Mother heads towards the door, dropping the laundry basket. She knows she has to put the clothes away after, but right now she really hurts. _

"_What do you mean it burns?" Judy turns around, a nagging suspicion biting at her. She had seen Russell taking pills recently, and she knew what they were for. She half expected him not to torment Quinn if he was taking those pills. _

"_My… my front burns." Quinn whispers. "It burns when I go to the bathroom, and it's just gotten worse." She hangs her head. She knows telling Mother about her pain will get her hit, hard. But she feels awful, she's never felt so sick before and this is making her want to vomit and sleep and not ever go to the bathroom again. She sucks in her breath as Mother bends down, readying herself for the coming slap. She's been taught to not ever complain, but she can't keep this in anymore; she's tried so hard, but she doesn't feel well at all. _

_Judy looks at the child's pale face, the red standing out brightly on her cheeks. She can see the goosebumps on Quinn's arms, and the dull glow in her eyes. She bit her lip. Russell wouldn't allow her to take Quinn to the doctor because of the questions it would raise, but to see the tiny figure sick like this… well, it was breaking her non-existent heart. _

"_Get your coat Quinn and we'll go see the doctor now. I'll leave your Father a note." Judy tugs at Quinn gently, but the little blonde stays rooted to the spot._

"_Can't you just tell him we went grocery shopping instead? He won't get as mad with you as he does with me…" Quinn whispers, afraid of what Father will do when she complains. She doesn't want a new punishment again. The other one still hurts her so much. _

"_Quinn, I'll handle it. Get your coat and let's go." Judy says, letting go of the girl's hand and watching her get a thin jean jacket. The November air outside would easily cut through the denim, but she knew it was the warmest thing Quinn owned. _

_Quinn coughs as she gets into the car, clutching onto Cinderella and leaning her head against the cold window. It feels so good, but her body is freezing, and she isn't wearing enough to keep her warm. Cinderella is only wearing the dress too and Quinn remembers the toy car still in its hiding spot. She runs her finger along the wheels of the car, and wishes she had a blanket. Then Mother could leave her in the car, with a warm body and cold head. She shouldn't have asked for help, or told Mother about this at all, she'd be in so much trouble tonight. _

_The ride to the clinic was silent, Quinn just spinning the wheels of the car and pressing Cinderella's head to her cheek. She wants to cry, but she already has a headache and it was really hurting down her front; crying would make her look ungrateful. She didn't know how, but that's what Father told her it did. She watches as the trees and cars and house passed by in blurs, her head spinning and she desperately tries to keep her eyes open. _

"_We're here Quinn, come on," Quinn doesn't want to move at Mother's words, and she tries sitting up before pressing her head against the window again. She knows Mother is waiting for her, and she'll be hit when she gets home for being disobedient, but she can't move. She hurts too much. _

_The door opens, and it's much too cold for Quinn to handle. She tries curling into the smallest ball ever, but it's not working. Mother's picking her up? Why is she doing that? Quinn leans her head gently on Mother's shoulder, afraid that she'll shake her off. But she doesn't, and Quinn relaxes a little. Mother is warm, and Quinn knows she can't get used to this… she really can't, but… it feels nice. _

_The inside of the Doctor's office is warm, and Quinn wraps her arms around Mother's neck, Cinderella pressed between them. She listens as Mother talks to the secretary, requesting something, but Quinn isn't sure of what. They don't stay in the waiting room though, and the little rooms with the cushion beds are too cold. Mother sits in another chair lets go of Quinn on the big couch thing. Quinn wants to cry out for Mother again, she's freezing, but she doesn't say anything. _

_Judy hears Quinn whimper as she lies out the tiny blonde on the table, but she doesn't say anything either. Both of them will get it when they get home, but Judy shakes her head. She takes out her cell phone, and tries to busy herself with it; ultimately, she finds herself looking at Quinn's dirty sneakers, and her wrinkled jeans. She looks like every other kid…_

_Quinn closes her eyes when the doctor comes in. She knows he'll want her to answer the questions, but she doesn't have the energy or the willpower now. She's cold, and sick, and it hurts... down there…This makes her look so weak, she knows that, but she really can't talk well. She hears Mother's voice telling her something, and she just repeats how she's feeling to the doctor, watching him nod his head as well. He listens to her breath, and moves her up to look down her throat, and in her ears, and everything doctors do. She winces slightly as he says he has to look at where it's burning. _

_She nods and pulls down her jeans and underwear. This doctor knows about her, and he doesn't say anything about that. He looks surprised though, and Quinn gets worried. She doesn't like this; the look on his face. She's been to him a few times before, and he's never looked this shocked. _

_Judy looks from Quinn to Dr. Rothstein and she shakes off the look of astonishment on his face. Her fears were confirmed; she looks back at her phone as Quinn shakily tells him how long the burning had been for, and when she got the fever. She keeps her eyes down as Quinn gets dressed, and tugs on the sneakers, her cheeks flushed from fever. "Quinn, go wait outside in the waiting room while I get the prescription." _

_Quinn nods, and leaves the room. She waits for the door to close, and she sits beside it, trying to listen as the doctor talks to her mother. He uses a big word to describe what she has, and she caught a cold from wearing a thin jacket, which made the big word worse. She closed her eyes, and leaned against the wall. _

_Father did this to her. He never buys her anything warm. She once went to school, in snow, wearing a vest and hiking boots when all the other kids had big fluffy jackets and snow boots. He was making her sick now; Quinn felt like crying. This wasn't fair! She clings to Cinderella, crying into the blonde hair and it feels like her head is going to pop. Her tears are too hot for her face too. _

_The door opens; Mother comes out into the hall holding a prescription. She needs medication, but she knew that. Father's going to hurt her a lot because she's wasting so much money. That's what he calls it whenever she needs something, and that's why she never asks. Once, at school, she got her finger twisted in the fence, and it needed a special bandage. When she told Father, he hit the roof, and beat her badly. She stopped telling when she got hurt. _

"_Come on Quinn," Mother leans down and scoops her up again; Quinn feels special. Mother never treats her like this; she's lucky if Mother even talks to her during the week. Her head hurts a lot from crying, and she leans it on Mother's shoulder, trying to stop crying, wiping her tears on Cinderella's hair. She shouldn't be crying… she shouldn't be crying… _

_The cold air bites her cheek, but they go into the drugstore next door and get the medication. Quinn hates taking pills, she feels like every time she swallows one, it'll make her choke. She doesn't care about that part, but she doesn't know how to save herself if she starts choking. Father always made her take pills, even when she was younger._

"_Be thankful you don't need a shot," Judy says; she means to say something else, something comforting, but she can't find the words. They stick in her throat, and she can't get them out. The most she can manage is this, be grateful. She strokes Quinn's hair gently, feeling the girl tense under the gesture. Quinn wasn't used to this and she had no reason to be; Judy knew whenever someone touched her hair it was to pull it. _

_Quinn wants her head to pop and let out all the air inside it. She's tired, so tired… and when Mother touches her hair, she tenses her neck, ready for a slight tug; but there is none. What she really wants is for Mother to kiss her head and say she'll feel better soon, like she sees on TV, but she knows that will never happen. _

_She feels Mother sit in a chair, waiting for the prescription. It's so nice being here; so much nicer than home. Quinn decides she'd be happy to live in this drugstore instead of going home; it has food, a toothbrush and bandages, everything she needs. Mother keeps stroking her hair, and knows it feels nice. She hates it terribly, but she loves it too. She knows she'll never get it again. _

_Mother relaxes in the chair a bit and Quinn's head bumps against the cushion at the back. She hugs Mother tightly around the neck, and closes her eyes, wanting to sleep badly. She'll only stay asleep for a minute, just a little rest. She's really tired. _

…

_Wha… What? She's on the couch now. She must've fallen asleep before because she can hear Father yelling at Mother, and she doubts she dreamed the whole thing. She's in her softer pajamas too, Mother must have changed her. She's so warm, it's so nice. She's wrapped in a blanket like a cocoon, and there's a cold compress on her forehead. She pretends to be asleep for a little longer; Father is bound to come in here. All she can hear is yelling, and she wants to plug her ears._

_It's about her. He's yelling about she's a waste of space and money. Quinn honestly wonders why he didn't just give her up; she thinks they'd both like that a lot more than this. She wants Mother to come in here again, and stroke her hair and hold her tightly; See? This is what happens… she wants it again… she's so stupid… _

_Father does come in and he looks angry. Quinn's eyes shake open, they're really dry from crying and she slowly sits up, her head spinning. _

"_Why are you on the couch?" He says, grabbing her arm and pulling her up. She winces slightly, and her legs fall out from under her. She clings to the blanket, and tries to keep the compress against her forehead, but it falls down her face and clings to her shirt. She grabs Cinderella tightly, and holds the blanket to her; the tiles she's being dragged on are so cold… She leans against her extended arm, trying to keep her eyes closed. _

"_Stand up you spoiled shit!" He yells, and she tries, she really does; she has no energy, and down she goes again. Her knees hit painfully against the stairs, and he grabs the blanket from her… It's freezing in the house… at least upstairs has carpet. _

_The ground vanishes. The carpet doesn't sting her lower legs, and her arm isn't being pulled. She winces as she crashes into armoire, lying in a crumpled, breathing heap on the floor, and curling tightly to stay warm. She hears a click outside, and she knows he's locked her in; she can't be contaminating the whole house, now can she. She gnashes her teeth in protest, using the last of her energy to land face first on the bed. _

_Cinderella goes flying across the room, head first into the closet door. Quinn instantly misses her best friend, and rolls her head to the side; she sees the doll looking back at her, smiling still. She wants to get up, but she can't… she's too tired. She has to get Cinderella when she has more strength… just a quick nap should do it… _

-.-

Santana Lopez slammed the door to the Pierce house and started stalking her way down the path back to her house. She had tried texting Brittany, but the blonde apparently didn't like to answer her goddamn phone. Santana rolled her eyes at another one of Puck's texts and felt like throwing the stupid thing into the pond. Her boots clanged against the pavement, making the tick-tick sounds of heel on concrete.

The phone started buzzing again. "Puck, leave me alone!" She shouted at nobody in particular, and looked down at the phone, feeling her stomach sink at the Lopez House number on the screen.

"Hi Mami," Santana said, trying not to sound too pissed off.

"Where are you?" Shit, no hello back. Something was up with her folks.

"I'm walking home from Brittany's, why? What happened? Is Papi ok? Is Brittany ok?" She rambles out, still afraid of anything.

"Oh, everybody's fine, but you better get your ass home before I get your Papi to drag it back." Shit… she found out… Berry had the guts to tell her dads. Santana felt a little respect for the midget, but was really pissed off with her too.

"Mami, I swear, if this is about why I went out with Puck…" Santana was cut off.

"You said you were going to Brittany's tomorrow Santana, I remember you clearly telling us this. And what exactly did you do with Puck yesterday young lady? Please, enlighten me." Santana swallowed hard. She was in such deep shit, she ought to turn and run right now. To where? Puck's house? He was asleep. Brittany wasn't home, and she was pretty sure if she turned up at the Berry home, RuPaul's dads would skin her alive.

"We just… y'know… hung out…?" Santana knew her Mami could see right through the lie, and judging by the tone of her voice, she just dug her own grave.

"Really, and this hanging out didn't happen to be at a park, did it? With that little pond beside it?" Santana sucked in her breath. Yeah, she had been squealed on. That little brat was totally getting it in school tomorrow. If Santana was still alive, of course. She looked up at the street names, and looked at the house right in front of her. Crap, Mami was looking at her through the window; the older woman looked ready to kill. She was dead.

"In expla…" Santana couldn't get the words out.

"Get your sorry ass in the house. Now." The phone clicked off, and Santana kept her head down heading up the walkway, pissed as hell and scared. When her parents were made at her, they could make Sylvester look like a Teddy Bear. She shoved open the front door and dropped down the bag full of overnight supplies.

Her mother stood, arms crossed standing in the foyer. Gloria Lopez, in all her 5 feet 2 inches, looking very intimidating. Santana turned her head and saw her Papi emerge from his study, looking extremely tired, talking on the phone. He was promising something, to someone, and Santana suspected it to be one of the Mr. Berry's.

"What the hell did you do?" Gloria paced up to Santana and looked eye to eye with her daughter, standing in heels. "You're lucky your Papi's trip got an early cancellation because the Berry's called here first, and then they were going to call the police. You could've been arrested! Are you really that stupid as to beat up that Berry girl! After you know how overprotective her parents are!"

Santana kicked the edge of the carpet with her shoe, determining it safer to let her mother rant before she spoke up.

"Well? Answer me? He's been in there for an hour getting all the details and trying to keep those fathers from pressing charges. You must have some angel watching over you to prevent a police charge Santana Lopez, I swear to God!" Gloria continued, beginning to pace around the small front hall.

Santana opened her mouth, but quickly shut it. She really couldn't say because she was full of pride, and those two were testing her. If she said that, she'd probably get smacked by her mother.

"You can't even answer me." Gloria threw up her hands and shook her head. "Really? That's the best you can come up with?"

"How did you find out?" She whispered softly, knowing her mother could still hear her.

"Brittany apparently told the Berrys, and they interrogated their daughter, and found out it was true." Gloria looked at Santana puzzlingly, noticing how her face had gone from ashamed, or something like that, to shocked. She spent about 20 seconds trying to stammer out some words before finally settling on one.

"Brittany?" Santana swore felt the floor fall out from under her, but she was still standing.

"Yes, because you're friend apparently has a conscience!" Gloria shook her head, the rant halfway over. "I swear Santana, where did you leave your brain this time? What the hell possessed you to do what you did to that Berry girl?"

Santana sat on the steps, listening to her mother go on and on, occasionally nodding in all the right places. Her mind was reeling. _Brittany? Brittany seriously told them? What the fuck? That doesn't make any sense… _Santana put her chin in her hands and sat in shock while her mother kept talking.

"Santana Lopez, you are in a world of trouble young lady." Hector Lopez ran his fingers across his scalp; trying to stop sweating from the constant uphill battle he had just finished fighting. "What the hell were you thinking?" He wasn't shouting, he rarely did; instead he was an eerie calm.

"Mami already asked me that, about 20 times." Santana muttered, watching her Papi pace in the hall, gripping the phone.

"I called your school, left a message." Hector said, handing the phone to Gloria. "You are out of the Cheerios, for one." He ignored the look of protest on Santana's face, and stopped her before she said anything. "I don't want to hear it Santana, you will accept whatever punishment we give to you, because if you want, we can make this a court case."

Santana shut up, crossing her arms against her chest. She could feel herself reverting to a 5 year old's behavior. She was actually good at cheerleading, and she wasn't about to join any other team.

"Apparently, according to the principal, you never attend glee club, and it was mandatory by your cheerleading coach, correct?" Hector looked at Santana exasperated, and she nodded. "And you haven't gone to a single one. You're going to them now. All of them."

"What was the principal doing in school on a Sunday?" Gloria looked up at her husband, who shrugged and continued again. This wasn't ending easily, nor should it.

"Give me your phone, your house keys and your car keys." He said, sticking out his hand. Santana grumbled loudly, making her disdain known as she pulled them out of her pockets and slapping them noisily into her Papi's open palm. "Don't expect to see these for a long time."

"How am I supposed to get to school, and get in the house?" Santana said defiantly. This was total bullshit, taking away everything. It was a few punches, seriously.

"I'll drive you to school in the morning, and your Mami can pick you up in the afternoon. A few minutes out of her work won't hurt. Plus, you won't have any reason to leave the house for a very long time, because you are grounded, for a very long time. That means no parties, no celebrating New Years this year, no St Patrick's Day parties, yes I know about those," Hector continued, basically telling her she was grounded until she graduated, and Santana sort of expected that. He parents were tough as nails, and it was annoying as hell.

"Anything else you want to take away from me, or do you just want me to live in the basement, sleeping on the futon?" Santana half-expected to get another lecture from Gloria then, but Hector stepped in.

"No, we already took out the things from your room that can interfere with your punishments." Hector said, picking up the bag and handing it to Santana. "You can go now. I wouldn't bother trying to sneak out the windows either, they don't open anymore." He said, going back into the study, dialing the phone.

Santana was fuming as she pounded the stairs up to her bedroom. Not. Fucking. Fair. She threw open the door to her bedroom and saw her laptop had disappeared. The TV had cables missing in the back, and her iPod that she left in her dock was gone. Gone. Everything damn thing was gone!

"Son of a bitch!" She screamed, slamming the door. Fuck this shit. She was not staying grounded. It was way to easy to skip class and just go somewhere. "Brittany, goddamnit!" She punched a pillow. The blonde would get a big lecture tomorrow, and she would threaten her with everything. Brittany would have to listen to her, or she wouldn't get what she wanted; Santana knew exactly what the blonde wanted.

"Language Santana!" Gloria called through the door, and Santana fell, face forward, onto her bed, launching the pillow at the door, wishing it made a bigger crash.

* * *

**Ok, one quick comment here. I know it might be lenient with Rachel's dads, but I really want Rachel to be the one who discovers all of Quinn's secrets, and not rushed in any way. I actually have those scenes, in rough, penned already, so I'm trying to stick to a storyline. I also really don't want to make this a cop/jail fic, so I'm just keeping that out entirely.**


	8. Come As You Are

**With all the homework, and playing Fallout, I'm surprised this chapter got finished so soon. However, the wait for the next one might be a little long, sorry about that. Anyways, big thanks to everyone who took the time to read and review this story, and also to those who are following it and favourited it. This story has also surpassed 100 reviews! So everyone who reviewed, THANK YOU! **

**Sorry for the horrible grammar and any spelling mistakes. All mistakes are mine. I don't own Glee, and I'm extremely pissed with it currently because Brittana is no more... **

**Warning! Child abuse, mentions of rape... that's about it. **

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Rachel adjusted the cat ears and stepped out of her Daddy's car nervously. This was the first morning in almost a month where Quinn hadn't been beside her to go into the school, and nervous barely covered what she was feeling. She had tried calling the blonde, multiple times, that morning, but she was met with the answering machine each time.

She gripped her phone in her hand nervously, waved goodbye to her Daddy and went into the school. She walked with her back straight, her exterior still showing the confident demeanor that usually got her slushied. She felt so eerily alone. Being with Quinn constantly, it made her less prepared for when she had to do things alone. She had no idea why she felt like this; before Quinn came, everything she had done was by herself.

"Hey Rachel," The tiny brunette looked up, and saw Brittany, wearing a unicorn horn and wings. She smiled at the sight.

"Hi Brittany, I like your costume," She continued walking to her locker, Brittany beside her. It was nice to have the company.

"Thanks, my brother always wanted me to go as a unicorn one year, and he'd be a leprechaun, so I am. Yours is good too." Brittany smiled, popping a piece of candy. She offered the box of Nerds to Rachel, but Rachel honestly didn't feel like eating.

She knew the tall blonde was hurting today. She remembered in grade eight, how her brother had died on Halloween and Brittany really couldn't compose herself for a few weeks. She also remembered how Santana had pretty much made it so that Brittany isolated herself from everyone. Controlling bitch.

"Thanks," She spun the lock, and opened her locker, grabbing her few binders and tossing in her jacket. Her bag seemed so much heavier today, and she was just tired overall. Making it through the classes would be a challenge, but at least it was the weekend. "Have you heard from Quinn?"

"She texted me last night, but it was only to remind me to bring the math assignment." Brittany leaned against the lockers, eating another handful of Nerds. This day was going to be long, she knew it.

"Oh… OK," Rachel nodded, and slammed the locker shut, unaware of where to go before English started. She wasn't sure what exactly she should do. "I'm just worried about her."

"Me too," Brittany whispered, watching the students come in from the buses, and pack up the hallways. Rachel looked at Brittany, and knew they were thinking the same thing. She grabbed the blonde's wrist and pulled her to the familiar bathroom, dodging the other students, and avoiding what would surely be a nasty run-in with Finn and Santana. She had seen Finn with a bunch of his football friends this morning driving to school and Santana would surely be trying to hunt Britt down.

Pushing open the bathroom door, Rachel breathed out when she saw no one else was in here. She leaned against the sink, and brushed back her hair, her knuckles suddenly pained. She didn't notice how tightly she was holding her phone. "I think she's being hurt, very badly. You see it too, right?"

"Yeah," Brittany wasn't sure how to get the words out, but she knew what she wanted to say.

"Do you think it could be her parents?" Rachel looked up at Brittany's worried face. The blonde was looking at the ground, her hands clasped together tightly. "I mean, I don't want to falsely accuse anyone of something this serious, but do you think it could be them..."

"I'd bet money it's her parents." Brittany whispered, leaning on the bathroom wall. She doesn't know what to say. She seemed stunned.

"It just doesn't add up. Nothing else makes sense. She's never talked about her parents, it's like she's afraid of them. Whenever I try and bring it up, she just changes the subject." Rachel covers her mouth with her hand, just thinking about those scars on Quinn's arms and back. The pink lines; she knew they had healed, but they looked so raw. "Brittany… she has scars."

"She was probably hit metal then. Getting hit with anything else doesn't leave a mark. Me and Aaron used to hit each other will all sorts of things and we never got hurt badly." Brittany knew that a little sibling rivalry wasn't anything compared to what Quinn had probably gone through, but Halloween always made her think of her brother.

Rachel felt the tears burn in her eyes, and she tried blinking them back. Of course it had to be a metal object, or a belt of some sort. She wasn't ignorant to this sort of thing; she had seen it in newspapers, or online articles and things like that, but it wasn't like this… All she could see in her mind was Quinn being hit with something; a lamp or a belt of some sort. She could almost picture the look on Quinn's face, pained and crying. She couldn't see what the brute looked like, but she could hear the smack of metal on skin and it made her want to burst out in tears.

"Why isn't she saying anything?" Rachel finally managed to get out… and she started crying. She couldn't really hold anything back at this point, and she cried harder as Brittany hugged her tightly. "Why… why can't she tell me?"

"Rachel, she's afraid. I think you already said that." Brittany whispered, trying to calm down the sobbing girl. "You said she's afraid of her parents, so she might be crazy afraid of them. Like, she's too scared to say anything because she thinks her parents will hear it and hurt her."

That statement, it pretty much broke her. Rachel felt like she never wanted to stop crying, and she knew Brittany's intentions of a hug were good. However, she just wanted Quinn to hold her now; rather, she wanted to hold Quinn and listen as the blonde opened up to her. She pulled back from Brittany, afraid she'd never stop crying if she just stayed there, and she wiped her eyes.

"Do you think we should talk to her about it? Should I question her or something? I can't keep this in anymore Brittany, I'm scared for her." She sniffled, and wiped away more tears. The waterworks keep flowing. Quinn was missing school, and no matter how much the blonde complained about it, she always showed up. She would never just ignore Rachel's texts either.

"I don't know. She might get scared if you ask her about it. If she thinks her parents can somehow always find out about her, she won't want to talk about it." Brittany said quietly, and Rachel looked at her. She was so calm and level headed about this entire thing. "If you ask her, just do it quietly."

"You're right," Rachel said, with a little disbelief. "I can't jump her. She'll fight and run. I can't gently bring it up because she'll run. How do I do this Britt?"

"Let her bring it up" Brittany shrugged her shoulders at the suggestion, and felt her hands go clammy. She had read about these sorts of things; where a kid is hurt by their parents. She has read the newspaper, not just for the comics.

"But I don't know how long that could take." Rachel whispered, and the bell rang loudly. They were late, perfect. Just another added bonus to this already horrible day. "Do we have lunch together today?"

"No, I have it after 3rd period, and you have it after math." Brittany poured out another handful of Nerds and began eating them, offering the pack again to Rachel. The brunette sighed, but poured about half the box into her hand, nibbling at them.

"Alright, I'll see you in math then," Rachel whispers, and the two leave the bathroom. She starts heading to English, picking at the candy in her hands. She has to endure Santana in 3 of her classes, and she's really sick of the Latina's blunt comments. She can't fight back now, she has been classy and civil to Santana for as long as she's known her; she cannot wreck that. She really has to control whatever urges she has to strangle the bitch.

She balled her hands into fists as she entered English class, keeping her bag close to her. Santana looked up and their eyes met, Rachel trying to calm herself down with every step. She had never felt so angry; Santana likewise never looked so vicious. She dropped her bag in beside her desk, and pulled out a notebook. Quinn had drawn her various little sketches, and she had just kept them all in one binder. She realized how much she missed the blonde.

English seemed to pass by at a snails pace, and Rachel barely took any notes on the lecture. She had managed to scrawl down what was on the board, but nothing more. Her phone nearly got taken away 3 times because of her constantly checking for texts.

Finally the bell rang, and Rachel bolted out of the classroom. She clutched the notebook to her chest tightly, and kept her head down as she made her way through the hallways. She hadn't realized how attached to Quinn she had become until she ran through the halls like this; alone, afraid.

She stopped dead in her tracks as the frozen drink attacked her. The notebook hit the floor with a thud, and she felt the ice slam against her crown, the freezing drink trickle down the back of her shirt. The laughter from Finn got her so upset, she felt like crying. She wanted to punch him, but she couldn't take him on, she knew that.

Wiping away the strawberry drink from her eyes, she dropped to the floor to gather her notebook and she ran to the bathroom. Away from his laughter, away from all their laughter; she was sick of it. This day was going from bad to worse.

The door to the washroom creaked open, and Rachel ran in, dropping her bag onto the floor and the notebook onto the hopefully dry counter. She grabbed a paper towel and cleaned her eyes and face, dabbing at the wet shirt. It was black, and the stains would be unnoticeable, but it was freezing. She heard the toilet flush, and she tossed the notebook in the bag; no one could see what was in that book.

She began tying her hair in a rushed ponytail, her bangs dripping red water down her face still. She kept her head down as the girl came out of the stall, but when she heard the laughter, she saw red.

"Jeez Treasure Trail, you look lovely today. Is that a new shade of dork you have on?" Santana's irritating voice oozed out of her filthy mouth. Rachel turned to the Latina, and glared at her until she could tell she was making the girl uncomfortable.

"Look Santana, I really don't care how much trouble you got in because of last weekend, and I really, truly don't care about how much you fucked up with your girlfriend. I know everything in your life is fucked up, and frankly, I'm happy. You're suck a stuck up bitch, and you think the world revolves around you, but guess what? It doesn't." Rachel pounded the counter, causing Santana to jump a little.

"She's not my girlfriend…" Santana grumbled, but Rachel cut her off.

"Shut up, just shut up. I already stated that I couldn't care less about your relationship problems. I don't care who you're fucking, ok? Get that through your thick skull and remember it. You can make fun of me all you want, but I have the satisfaction of knowing that when you go home to an empty bed at night, I can go and stay with my girlfriend. When you feel empty after you're finished fucking Puck, or whoever it is that you sleep with, I can laugh at you. Why? Because I am in a committed, loving relationship with someone who loves me and cares about me. I know someone is looking out for me. Who's looking out for you Santana?" Rachel shushed her as she opened her mouth to respond. "Puck isn't looking out for you Santana, he'll run when he sees someone better and we both know that. Isn't that what happened at the Spring Dance in grade 10? Brittany? Well I think we both know that you've wrecked that relationship yourself."

"Will you shut up about that?" Santana shoved Rachel aside, and Rachel gladly moved out of the away.

"You can run from your problems Santana, but remember that karma will always come back and bite you. When it hits you, I hope you can remember what caused it." Rachel shouted as the bathroom door slammed. She felt the adrenaline pumped through her, and she grinned as she gripped the bathroom sink. Santana needed help, but she also needed love. Rachel knew that sometimes love was a healing factor, and maybe that emotional hindering was causing her problems.

Whatever, she truly didn't have time to fix the queen bitch's problems. The bell had rung during her little speech, and she was late to math class. Rachel cleaned up as much as she could, and tossed the balled paper towel into the trash. She grabbed her bag, and to her math class.

-.-.-

Quinn rubbed her eyes, jumping off of the couch like it's on fire. She was sweating, and panting; her dream had scared the living daylights out of her. She couldn't remember what the hell she was dreaming about though; she was just running… maybe. Whatever, she was starving, and she had to start putting on the makeup for Halloween.

Rachel had begged her to dress up as something, and she had reluctantly agreed. She really couldn't say no to Rachel, and that would one day get her in trouble. Trudging into the bathroom, she shut her eyes against the assault of the white tiles. Last night had been absolutely horrible, and she pulled the blanket around her lower half even tighter. He had ripped off her last pair of boxers, and she couldn't find where he tossed them. The apartment smelled like a wet dog from her falling asleep with wet hair.

Every step hurt, but she noticed how it was beginning to lessen already. All she ever felt on mornings like these was numb. If she didn't have school, she'd probably just run a bath and waste the day in the tub until Rachel inevitably came knocking on her door.

Quinn looked at herself in the mirror, and sneered at her reflection. She slowly took out the snakebites, leaving them on the counter. He had pulled at them so hard last night, she was afraid they were going to rip right out of her lip. They looked red and swollen though; Rachel would surely have something to say about that. She remembered how last night she had let her mind go blank when he went at her.

She began brushing her teeth, wandering back into the main room and flipping on the stereo. She had no idea what CD's were in here, and she knew she had left off in the middle of one of them. A familiar opening played; she smiled. This band was really awesome.

The bathroom had to get cleaned again. The floor was dotted with dried toothpaste, and other dull white spots. Quinn spat into the sink, washed her face quickly and went into the bedroom. She felt anger boil in her blood, listening to the lyrics. She scratched at the centers of her palms, sitting on the couch.

_NO! YOU'LL NEVER GET IT INSIDE. PUSH IT BACK DOWN, BLACKOUT, BLOOD IN YOUR EYE! _Quinn felt herself screaming along with the song, feeling the strength to stand and get her clothes on. She kicked her bag aside as she dug through the dresser, pulling out baggy pair of black jeans and a Libra top. She always felt like this after one of those nights…

She grabbed a pair of plastic horns and tinted red glasses, tossing them on as well. She was so pissed off right now, but she had to go pick up Rachel for school. She hated starting mornings like this. He had come back early… stupid bastard… She was actually looking forward to a week without him, but he had come back early. Quinn wanted to kick herself for thinking that he'd actually stay away.

Popping into the bathroom quickly, Quinn adjusted the horns and fixed her hair. Rachel had convinced her to grow it out, and it was turning into a shaggy pixie cut that she couldn't wait to grow out. She quickly steadied her balance as she looked at herself. It was like she was seeing a different person. She had never taken the time to examine how she had changed, and this was weird.

There was knocking at the front door that made her nearly jump out of her skin. She couldn't imagine who would bother her this early in the morning. The landlord was still asleep; if he was even home. She grabbed a lamp, holding it steadily behind her back, making her way up the stairs. She hated how there was no peephole with this door, and she really had to drill her own.

"Who the hell is it?" She growled, trying to intimidate the person, but they didn't answer, just knocked again. Fuck, she had to leave to get Rachel in 5 minutes. If this person was still here, she'd have to face him, or her. Truth be told, she was still scared that Santana or Puck would come to the house, and do away with her quickly. She knew Rachel wanted to go out trick-or treating, but she really didn't want to be out just her and Rachel at night. If she got ambushed during the day, night could be a murder scene.

She went down, grabbing her bag before coming back up the stairs, holding the lamp. There was a dent in the base from where it had hit her head, and she rubbed her crown lightly. She quickly opened the door, blinking at the light. Her face dropped when she saw who was standing there, and before she knew it, she slammed the lamp down on the mohawked head.

"Jesus Christ Fabray, stop that!" He said, his voice hushed, but Quinn ignored him. She swung the lamp like a baseball bat, tears leaving streaks in the grey makeup as the metal hit his chest. He wasn't menacing this time, just afraid it sounded. She didn't give a shit, she had been afraid before, and she couldn't run. The lamp was sounding against his chest again and again, Quinn panting.

"Shut up!" Quinn screamed. She knew she might wake the neighborhood. This was terrifying, and quite frankly, she was sick off all the men who ever came into her life being dicks. She slammed the lamp again, this time against his stomach and she realized how she could hear her CD player from up here. "Just shut up, you wretch! You fucking animal!" The lamp was brought down on his chest, the sound of metal against bone echoed in the narrow pathway. She could see him getting weaker, and she was really happy with the result.

"Listen Fabray…" Puck was struggling to stand after a few more blows from the lamp against his legs. Quinn was careful not to hit is head again, seeing as he didn't have too many brain cells to work with in the first place. "I want to talk...!"

"LIKE HELL YOU DO!" She hissed, noticing how people were poking their heads out the window. She was so happy that this little door was hidden out of sight from everybody. These people liked their tall trees.

"I'm serious. I know I was a dick, and I want to say something about it!" Puck grabbed the lamp from her, and Quinn froze. She didn't move as he tugged it from her, or tried to. Her knuckles were gripping the lamp so tightly they were white through the grey makeup. "Will you stop swinging this thing?"

She dropped it, gnashing her teeth so tightly her jaw was beginning to hurt. Before she could actually realize what she was doing, she ran back into the house, slamming and locking the door. She pressed her back to the wood, hearing banging still happening on the other side.

"C'mon Fabray, open the door!" He sounded like her father, except she was usually called 'bitch'. She felt the tears still flowing, scared out of her mind. What if he was hiding something? She had been lied to enough times before. He probably was making up that bullshit, and then he'd come in here, break down the fucking door, and rape her. Hell, he'd probably see what she really was, and he'd run away screaming.

Running down the stairs, the apartment looked unwelcoming. Quinn looked around quickly, trying to find a place to hide, but there weren't any doors. Something was blasting from the stereo still, but she couldn't shut it. Silence would hurt her even more.

Grabbing the other lamp, Quinn ran into the bathroom, and did… the logical thing. She hid in the tub with a blanket over her head. She remembered how when she was child, she always thought a blanket would protect her from the monsters. This was stupid, a piece of fabric wouldn't protect her from the beast outside, but it made her feel more comfortable than exposing her back.

Sliding down into the tub, Quinn swiveled around, and lay out on her back, panting, crying. Her makeup had run onto her neck, and she probably had grey stains on the black shirt, but she didn't care. He was out there, and he'd come in. She really didn't want face him, not now.

Fuck… Rachel was waiting for her. Rachel was probably worried about where she was right now, but she couldn't move. She gripped the lamp tightly, thinking about her phone, still shut off on the nightstand beside the couch. God, Rachel was probably panicking, and the phone was off. Even if it was on, it's not like Quinn could actually move right now. She felt paralyzed.

Closing her eyes so tightly she could see stars, Quinn tried to think about what it was like to be loved. She was convinced that someone was still outside the apartment, waiting for her. She could be killed so easily, and no one would ever know… at least, until the apartment started to smell. Puck and Father seemed to morph into one, in her mind. She was expecting someone to storm into the bathroom, and pull her out of the tub by her hair. She expected the rape now, the abuse… but it was like a part of her had reverted back to that childish mentality.

She was sobbing. She hadn't cried out of fear since she was twelve, when he had introduced another form of 'punishment'. She was scared. She knew what would come, and yet… she cried. Quinn thought she had numbed herself to this by now.

The stereo played the same 2 CD's over and over again, and Quinn finally realized what she was listening to. Music always gave her strength; at this point, feeling especially nostalgic, she wanted to hear Be Prepared. Paralysis must be over, because she could feel her head bobbing in time to the music. The blanket was slowly pulled down from over her eyes, and she blinked at the tiles again.

_STEEL UNLOAD, FINAL BLOW, WE THE ANIMALS TAKE CONTROL, HEAR US NOW, CLEAR AND TRUE, WRETCHES AND KINGS WE COME FOR YOU, _Quinn hummed along with the music. She felt like a little kid again, and she climbed onto the couch, perched on it like an eagle. This felt so weird, but so correct. He couldn't hurt her when she was like this. When she was getting stronger.

The couch's cushions were under her feet, and she screamed to the music, tears streaming down her face. She wanted to kill both of them, Puck and Father. She wanted them to die horrible deaths, and she only hoped that she had beaten some sense into Puck. Quinn ran her hands through her hair, knocking the horns off her head. She switched off the radio, and heard the familiar Lion King song play loudly in her head. They better be prepared for when she came to beat them.

Rachel needed her now. She couldn't stay like a scared little girl in her apartment. She really wanted too, but she knew that she had someone to fight for now, someone she really couldn't lose. Rachel made those horrible nights bearable; she was all Quinn could think about. After every encounter with Father, Rachel seemed to be the only thing stopping Quinn from killing herself.

She had someone to fight for now.

Quinn grabbed her keys from where they had landed, and swung her backpack over her shoulder. The Batman converse still on her feet, she pounded up the stairs, tentatively opening the door. He was gone… thank god… She climbed into the car, and looked at the dashboard clock; time had passed by her so quickly. Rachel should be on lunch in a few minutes.

Music blared through the stereo again, making her blood boil with anger. She hated them, she hated all of them. She was never like this; she honestly couldn't remember a time she was this angry. Maybe it was because none of those bullies at school ever had the gall to come to her house. Puck had stepped way over the line when he tried to _kill her_, but this was crossing _her_ boundaries. She had faced death before… more times than she would care to admit. There would be hell to pay.

Yes, she had promised Rachel that no one would be harmed in shop class. However, if that buzz saw 'accidentally' fell on Puck's hand, severing a few fingers, it wouldn't be her fault. Her fists pounded the steering wheel as she drove, smiling like an idiot. She really had to calm down with this sort of thing. It wasn't healthy.

She could see Rachel sitting on the bleachers when she pulled into the parking lot, and she could practically hear Rachel squeak as she saw the white Prius. She stepped out of the car, and ignored the rest of the smokers in the lot.

Fuck, she looked like some albino zebra now. The red glasses came out of her pocket, and she slid them on effortlessly; not that it mattered, her makeup was smeared with tear stains. The horns were tentatively balanced on her head. She lost her breath as Rachel tackled her in a tight embrace.

"Quinn, where were you?" Rachel exhaled, her hair tied back in a ponytail. It was dripping with cherry slushy from this mornings encounter with Finn.

"I was at home, I slept in too late." Quinn murmured, feeling Rachel's wet hair, and instantly pissed. "Rach, who the hell slushied you. If it was Santana, I swear I'll kill her, I really will."

"Relax Quinn, it wasn't Santana, it was Finn…" Rachel trailed off, looking up at Quinn's face for signs of emotion. She was angry, and Rachel took her hands gently. "But I'm fine." The short silence was broken by a grumble from Quinn's stomach. The blonde had skipped breakfast, usually had at Rachel's. "I haven't finished my lunch, care to join me?"

Quinn smiled sheepishly. It was amazing how Rachel could calm her down so quickly. The soft hands taking hers were like a diffuser, just settling her anger instantly. "Of course Princess. I assume that you'll want a better explanation?"

"Of course I do," Rachel whispered, feeling Quinn's arm around her and the two made their way to the bleachers. She knew Quinn wouldn't tell her what happened, no matter how much she asked. She was so quiet that way; it was scaring her a little. The walk to the bleachers was filled with light banter, but nothing that was important in Rachel's mind.

"Puck came to my house this morning," Quinn whispered. She didn't know where that revelation had come from… She took a bite of the salad, and looked up at Rachel.

"Wh… why would he do that?" Rachel was acted more scared than Quinn appeared to be. It seemed that Rachel was more afraid of the big lummox than Quinn was.

"I don't know; I stopped him before he had a chance to say anything." Quinn took Rachel's water and sipped it slowly. She pressed herself tightly next to the smaller girl hugging her tightly. She felt Rachel lean her head on her shoulder, and she brushed away a few strands of the dark hair.

"What did you do to him?" Rachel's voice was curious, and Quinn smiled. She knew that the brunette would never admit to it, but they both wanted to hurt Puck and Santana. Just a little.

"I beat him up with a lamp." Quinn glanced at the puzzled look on Rachel's face before down at her shoes. She grinned at the words. "I beat him up with a lamp… does that make any sense?"

"Why are you laughing about it?" Rachel smiled. Quinn's laughter was infectious. She got the blonde to repeat what she had said, barely able to say the words through the laughter.

"I don't know, I think it's so weird." Quinn sat up straight, tears running down her cheeks. It was a strange action, to Rachel at least; to her it was normal. She got hit with that lamp almost nightly. She felt herself crying harder, trying to hold it in.

Rachel looked up at Quinn, seeing the fresh tears leave more stains in the grey makeup. She pulled her jacket tighter around her balled fists and hugged the blonde tightly. She was ready to start crying as she felt Quinn retreating more, trying to curl into a ball.

"I mean, being hit with a lamp… when does that ever happen to people?" Quinn stuttered out, feeling like crap for breaking down again in front of Rachel. "It's so strange… unusual. It's unusual right?"

Rachel began rubbing small circles on Quinn's back as the blonde leaned onto her shoulder and cried. She didn't know what to say to that. Yes, to any person, it might sound strange, laughable even, but she knew something was seriously wrong. She opened her mouth multiple times, and shut it again, just keeping the rhythm of the circles as Quinn bawled. It was blatantly obvious to her that the blonde found this statement normal. "Quinn, what's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong Rach," She somehow managed to get out. Her chest was aching; from the punches last night and the crying was making it worse.

"You're lying Quinn, I can tell." Rachel kissed the crown of Quinn's head gently, shaking her head softly. "Please tell me. I'm not going to hurt you, I promise. I just want to help."

"Not now Rachel, I… can't." She couldn't tell Rachel of anything that happened. She didn't care if the brunette found out by herself, but she couldn't say a damn thing. The thought of saying it out loud made her sick.

"When can you tell me then?" Rachel knew she shouldn't pressure Quinn like this; something was wrong, and that nagging feeling wasn't fading as it usually did.

"I… I don't know… there's nothing to tell," Quinn sullenly muttered.

"Alright," Rachel was taken aback when Quinn suddenly stood up. Her hazel eyes were red and puffy, and she wiped the tears against her jacket sleeve. "Whenever you're ready to tell me, I'll be waiting…"

Quinn bit the inside of her lip. Rachel looked worse off then she was, the way those brown eyes were looking at her. She felt so guilty… and she knew that either way she would. If she said anything, she'd just feel horrible about putting the burden of… knowing on Rachel. "Thanks,"

Rachel quietly picked up the empty containers and slipped them back into her bag. She smiled softly as Quinn took her hand, helping her up. "Why did you take out your snakebites?"

Quinn blushed. "Damn, I thought you wouldn't notice."

"Trust me Quinn; I notice everything that happens to you." She said softly, sucking in her breath. "But if this is going to be another lie, I'll give you until science to think of a good one. At least make it somewhat believable."

-.-.-

_Quinn sits at her mirror, and looks at all the toy makeup she has. It's all free samples from Walgreen's but she doesn't care. Today is her tenth birthday, and it's so early in the morning that it's still dark outside. She picks up the red lipstick, and smears it on her lips, trying to be as neat as possible. She sets the tube beside her, and takes a red crayon, coloring the pale pink of Cinderella's lips a brilliant red. _

_She knows she's still young, and it still hurts her nightly to sit and roll over, but she feels something spur in her today. She feels braver, bolder, like she's ready to go outside and beat up anyone who picks on her. She's ready. _

_Quinn takes the black eyeliner, and puts on a dark line of it. She looks more like a pirate than a Princess, but she doesn't care. Today, she can be a pirate. Today she can be Captain Jack Sparrow. Today… she's ten. She puts on some dark eye shadow, and she really doesn't know what colour to use, but again, she doesn't care. She takes chalk, and decorates Cinderella's face as well. After so long, that doll is still her best friend. _

_She knows that she should tell someone about what's happening to her. She had an assembly about that a few days ago, about how kids are hurt like she is. She can't tell anyone though; Father's right about that. If she told someone, she'd have to go to someone else. Who else would want her? She's sick and twisted and she draws pictures of bloody vampires and dinosaurs in her spare time. She's a weird kid, that's how she refers to herself as; she likes who she is though. No one else does, but she likes herself. _

"_We must be swift as a coursing river," Quinn whispers softly, feeling really brave. She studies herself in the mirror, her hazel eyes jutting out against the ring of black around her eyes. She wants to change something, and she knows what to do. She doesn't care if she's immature or whatever. She just doesn't. She knows who she is. She knows she wants a Princess instead of a Prince, and she knows she wants to help people when she grows up. _

"_With all the force of a great typhoon." Quinn whispers, taking a tangle of hair bands from a drawer. She ties her long blonde hair up in smaller pigtails, and she grins at her appearance. She looks silly, and she likes it. She hates being whatever Father wants her to be. Father hates when she looks funny like this; he calls her stupid and she looks like a retard. She hates that word. No one should be called it._

"_How do I look Cinderella? Like a Pirate yet?" Quinn takes the bottle of water from beside her, and swigs back a sip. "See, I have my rum, and I have the eyeliner like Captain Jack Sparrow. Now I just need a pirate hairstyle and I'm good." She starts pulling out the hair bands and starts tugging at one viciously. It's stuck… _

_A devious smile comes onto Quinn's face. "Cinderella, do you think I should cut my hair?" She brings her ear close to the dolls mouth, and jumps out of the chair quickly. She runs to her school bag, and digs through it to find a pair of scissors. "I should? Good, that's what I thought too. I feel like a change, and this is a good change." Quinn frowns. "All he does is pull my hair, and I'm sick of it! If my hair is short, he won't have anything to pull because his hands are too fat!" Quinn bursts into laughter, Disney songs playing around her head happily. She makes it to her stereo, and starts up something. _

_Quinn grabs Cinderella and swings her around, singing along with Shang, crooning the words loudly. She dances for a little, waiting for the chorus. "We must be swift as a coursing river, with all the force of a great typhoon, with all the strength of a raging fire!" Quinn jumps onto her bed, scissors in one hand and Cinderella still holding on in the other. "Mysterious as the dark side of the moon!" She really should be quieter, but she doesn't care. Father might've left early, and besides. She's ten now, she can fight a little stronger. Being ten is special. She isn't a little kid with one digit numbers anymore. She has two digits now, and it'll be that way until she turns 100. _

_She dances around her room, jumping on the bed and swinging around Cinderella. She sings along with Scar, and Sebastian the Crab, and even with Pocahontas, "Cinderella, aren't these songs lovely. I wish I was a real life Disney Princess." Quinn whispers, dropping onto her knees and lying back. She's tired, but happy. This is the perfect way to start off her birthday. A loud cry comes from the stereo, and up she stands again. She waits for it, and then holds Cinderella up like Simba in the Lion King. It's the perfect way to start a day. _

"_All right Cinderella, we can continue this when I'm done with my make-over. I need a change. Father likes my hair long, but I don't like it anymore." Quinn takes a fistful of her hair, and puts the scissors right next to her ear. She quickly snips it, and the long strands drape around her closed fist. She looks at the choppy spot on one side, and nods firmly. "Alright, no turning back now." _

_Quinn keeps cutting, seeing as the blonde locks just fall around her. She smiles as she likes what she sees. It's a pixie cut, like Tinkerbell, but without the bun. The scissors finally snip away the last long strands, and she looks through her now long bangs, grinning. She brushes them back, and they stay there. She's really pretty. With the makeup, and everything. It's choppy in some places, but she can feel the open air on her neck and it's nice. She tries to grab a fistful of her own hair, trying to hold it like Father did, but can barely do it. "See, if I can't grab my hair, Father can't either." _

_She stands up and digs around in her closet, looking for something that's really big. She wants a Princess dress, and a pirate hat. She wants to be a pirate Princess, how cool is that? She finally pulls out a gymnastics costume with a little skirt. It's bright blue, and sparkly and everything. She finds some cheap gold beads and puts them on, as well as the costume. She doesn't have a pirate hat, but she knows how to make one with paper, so she digs through her homework and rushes to make one. _

_Yes! A Pirate Hat. She scrawls Captain Jack Sparrow on it and sticks it on her head, taking her ruler from her bag as a sword. "Arr matey, I'm Princess of all the Pirates! Grand Ruler and such! Now bring me your rum and candy and we shall have ourselves a feast of Great Proportions! Listen, to the melody the ship's band plays! Don't you know it first mate Cinderella?" _

_Quinn dances like the muses as Megara comes on again. "Arr, it's I won't say I'm in love! Well that's an easy one First Mate! I've loved nobody and nobody's loved me. It's so simple!" She waits for the next song… "Arr! Another easy one! I'm an outcast, but look at me mate. God's all but forgotten me! Arr, no matter. I have my best friend to keep me company." _

_Quinn's been waiting for that door to burst open, and when it finally does, she actually backs away in fear. She falls onto the fall, and scurries backwards until she's up against her bed. Father's standing there and his face is bright red from anger. _

"_What the hell are you doing awake so early?" He shouts loudly, and Quinn's heart nearly stops when she sees the colour drain from his face. She's seen his face so red before, but she never saw the colour drain like that. "WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO YOURSELF?" _

"_I… I…" Quinn stutters, and she hears the stereo switch to Colours of the Wind. She wants to burst into tears, but she doesn't. She shoves Cinderella under her bed, waiting for the punishment that will definitely come soon. _

"_Spit it out child! What the fuck did you do?" Father grabs her by her arm, but then his hand goes to her neck and she feels the tears run hot on her cheeks. He tightens his grip, and Quinn's hat falls off. She feels herself being carried somewhere, and she's slammed against the wall hard. Her head hurts, and her eyes want to pop out of their sockets. She's slammed again against it like a rag doll, and she's crying hard. _

"_I cut my hair!" She screams. "I wanted to so I did it!" She yells as he slams her against the wall again. _

"_Because you wanted to? What kind of excuse is that? I wanted to do a lot of things but I never did! I still have you, don't I?!" He screams back, and Quinn would see red if she could breath. She stops trying to pry his fingers off her throat, and she balls her hand into a fist, slamming it down on his arm. _

"_You can't make me have long hair!" Quinn screams loudly, and slowly opens her eyes. Father's face is pale and she's slammed painfully against the wall again. He slaps her quickly, and she wants to cry. Her cheek hurts so much, and then he punches her… there. Her hands fly to her private parts, and she cries. _

"_I'm your FATHER! I created you! I own you, and you can't do anything about it! No one else wants you, you stupid child! You will listen TO ME!" He slams her against the wall multiple times, and she can't breath because he's fingers are closing in on her tightly. _

_He stops mid-thrust, and Quinn feels something is wrong. She's moving again, and she hears her dresser's big cabinet open. He pulls out some of her clothes, and tosses her in like she's a rag doll. She's bawling now, and she hits her hand against the doors as they slam shut. She's breathing heavily down, and it's super hot in here. _

"_Let me out!" Her voice trembles with tears, and she's crying hard. Cinderella isn't here either, and she can't bear it. "Let me out, please! Let me out!" _

"_You'll come out when I need you," He calls through the door, and Quinn knows she's locked in. He has a key for everything, and she's seen the lock on these doors. Why do you need a lock on a dresser drawer? To guard your clothes? "Enjoy your day, Brat." _

_She hears her own door close, and she cries so hard. "Let me out!" She screams "Let me out! Please!" Her voice breaks as she screams, but no one comes. "PLEASE! LET ME OUT! I'LL BE GOOD, I PROMISE! PLEASE!"_

_-.-_

"Quinn, where were you?" Rachel rushed to their lockers after the bell rang, seeing Quinn hanging around her locker. The blonde had missed science class, and they had a lab today, of all days.

"I was out on the bleachers, just hanging around." Quinn lied innocently, and Rachel raised her eyebrow.

"Really? Is that why I saw Finn holding his severely bleeding face on my way over here?" Rachel shook her head, opening her locker quickly. "Quinn, you really have to stop beating up anyone who slushies me. I'm fine, honestly."

"I'm just tired of that stupid oaf trying to put all the attention on him and all the negative attention on you." Quinn leaned on the lockers, tired as hell. Finn had put up a fight, but it was really nothing she wasn't used to. A few hits here and there, but she wasn't cut up as bad as he was.

"I am too, but he'll just keep popping up, so we might as well get used to it." Rachel whispered softly, looking at Quinn sadly. She brushed a strand of the blonde hair away from the pale face and kissed Quinn lightly. "But it's the weekend, and we can now go to my house and watch movies all night."

Quinn smiled as Rachel's lips brushed by hers. "That sounds awesome." Hopefully, it would be movies... and nothing more.

"Good, and it's just me and you for the weekend. My Dad had to go out of town on a business trip, and my Daddy went with him." Rachel slammed the locker door shut and took Quinn's hand.

"They did that after that whole fiasco last weekend?" This took Quinn by surprise. Did they actually trust her to watch their house all weekend, and with her girlfriend?

"I guess they trust you that much." Rachel hugged Quinn's arm as they stepped out into the cold wind in the parking lot. "That's a very good thing." She slid on her mittens softly, and adjusted the cat ears. She felt a little guilty because she hadn't seen Brittany since math that morning, and she knew how hard the blonde took Halloween.

"Yay, your parents don't hate me. That's good." Quinn smiled, breathing into her own hands, trying to keep warm. The smile dropped from her face. Her car would be sitting in Rachel's driveway all weekend, and he would certainly want to drop by her tiny apartment. She couldn't have that fucking Prius anywhere near Rachel's house if he went scouting for her. "Rach, I just have to run back to my apartment for some stuff."

"Do you really have to?" Rachel sighed a little, anxious to get back to her house. "If you need pajamas or a toothbrush or anything, I can lend it to you."

"I… I really need to just get it from my house." Quinn murmured. She felt like shit, feeding Rachel all this bullshit, but she couldn't help it. She was a natural born liar.

"Alright, but I want to listen to my CD in the car." Rachel tried to sound upbeat, but this day had clearly exhausted them both. Tomorrow night they would go out for some candy, but tonight all she waned to do was lie in bed.

"Fair enough," Quinn unlocked the car, and the two got in, tossing the bags into the backseat. Rachel pulled out a nameless CD from the bag, and slid it into the player, the music slowly beginning and taking over the silence. "You're a fan of Mumford and Sons?"

"Yes, I like the lyrics especially." Rachel whispered, taking Quinn's trembling hand on the stick shift. "My musical tastes venture further than Barbra Streisand." She grinned as Quinn laughed, it was such a sweet sound that she never heard enough of.

"I never assumed you were just a Streisand fan, we did spend that Saturday watching Disney movies and singing with them." Quinn veered into her section of the neighborhood, quickly passing by her parent's house without looking up. His car was in the driveway.

"So you thought I just liked Disney music and Barbra?" Rachel feigned being hurt, and she pouted, waiting for Quinn to look at her. She managed to keep the look as Quinn blushed, and leaned over for a quick kiss. "Am I supposed to take that as a compliment?"

"I don't know. It means you're innocent, I guess." Quinn whispered, finally pulling into the horrible driveway. The two got out of the car slowly, and made their way through the frosty air to the side door. Quinn shoved open the wooden slab and let Rachel enter first, seeing the brunette's cheeks pink up from the sudden warmth.

"What do you have to get now?" Rachel kicked off her shoes and looked around the apartment. "Quinn, it looks like a tornado went through this place. What happened?" She looked up at the bloodstains on the wall and gasped. "Quinn, what happened?"

"That's nothing, don't worry about it." Quinn grabbed the CD's from the stereo and emptied her knapsack, tossing in a pair of pajamas and running into the bathroom for her toothbrush.

"Quinn, it's a bloodstain that wasn't here last week. What the hell happened?" Rachel glared at Quinn, feeling instantly guilty as the blonde put her head down, like she was ashamed.

"I was running late, and I ran into the wall on my way up the stairs." Quinn lied, watching Rachel run her fingers through her hair. She looked tense as hell, and Quinn knew she was getting frustrated. She was not revealing that Father had slammed her so hard against the wall after ripping up her upper back.

Rachel wanted to grab Quinn by the shoulders and shake her so hard, until she finally told the truth about all these cuts and bruises. She felt herself get choked up, but she swallowed the lump before looking back at the blonde. "Why can't you tell me what's happening?"

"I… I…" Quinn went back to zipping the bag, trying to think of something. "Look, Rach… I'll tell you, but not here and not now." Quinn couldn't believe what she was saying, and she hated the way Rachel's eyes lit up when she said that. She knew Rachel wanted the truth, but she couldn't let this relationship slip through her fingers, not when she was really getting the hang of it. She had finally figured out how to love Rachel properly… or at least, as best she could… but now she was going to throw it all away.

"Really?" Rachel put a reassuring hand on Quinn's back and smiled as the blonde turned to face her. "Thank you. Quinn, I just want you to be able to trust me with whatever you're going through. I promise, I'll try to help as much as I can."

Quinn fumbled with her hands nervously, nodding. She leaned in quickly, allowing herself to feel the warmth coming from Rachel's cheeks as she kissed the brunette. It happened every time she kissed Rachel; the longing, the wanting, how she would've given anything to be able to freeze time.

The roar of a car's engine broke their thoughts, and Quinn jumped back, slinging the bag over her shoulder. "Rach, let's just head to your place. I'll show you a shortcut."

"Really? Quinn we live on opposite sides of this especially large area, I doubt there's a shortcut." Rachel complied as Quinn pulled her up the stairs by the wrist, trying to slide on her shoes.

"Trust me on this. I think the owners are having friends over." Quinn gritted her teeth against the air, and locked the door. She pulled Rachel into the backyard facing the road clogged with rush hour traffic. Quinn tossed her bag up over the face, hearing it thud on the other side, and she climbed onto it.

"Quinn, are you crazy?" Rachel pulled herself up beside the blonde, the air cutting her cheeks harshly. "Why can't we take the car?"

"Rach, I said I'll explain everything to you when we get to your place, and I will. The car is another explanation." Quinn swung up her leg, catching it on the top of the fence and balanced uncomfortably on the top of it. She looked at Rachel, still frozen in position and rolled her eyes. "You're a dancer right? Just pretend this is a dance move and you have to swing you leg up."

Rachel shook out of her daze, and swung her leg up, Quinn catching her. She pressed herself against the fence, feeling Quinn's protective grip pulling her leg over the fence so she was sitting horseback on the wood. She jumped onto the grassy path on the roadside, and looked towards the sidewalk and the small businesses on the opposite side of the cars. With a thud, Quinn was beside her, the bag on one shoulder.

"You do know we have almost a two hour walk now, and we could've taken the car." Rachel pressed herself as close to Quinn as possible, her head buried in the blonde's shoulder away from the wind.

"I'm sorry Princess, but we couldn't take the car. At least the sun's out." Quinn looked down at Rachel, who was refusing to look up. "C'mon Princess, smile for me, just once."

"I can't feel my face Quinn, how I can smile?" Rachel said against the jacket, knowing Quinn could hear her.

"Well, if you bring your face up a little," Quinn took Rachel's chin in her frozen hair, and titled her head down to kiss her softly. She pulled away, seeing the smile still linger on Rachel's face. "You should be able to smile,"

"I'm still frozen though," Rachel nuzzled her cheek against Quinn's arm again. Quinn loosened her grip, and pulled her in closer. It did feel nice, Quinn's body heat surrounding her, and she felt loved, very much so.

"I'm sorry about this Princess, I really am." Quinn kissed the top of Rachel's head, "I love you so much. Believe me; we wouldn't be walking if I could change my situation."

Rachel bit her lip, calming herself down. She desperately wanted Quinn to tell her what was so wrong. "I trust you. Quinn, I'll always trust you; you should know that by now. I love you too,"

* * *

**If you read Homestuck, you'll understand Quinn's costume.**


	9. Stargazers

**Alright, I don't know how long it's been, but here's an update. I've read and re-read it over and over again, so I hope it's alright. I wrote it in parts, so if it sounds a little choppy, apologies. I honestly can't give you guys a time frame for the next update because I need to keeping above a failing grade in English class. I've also been listening to too much punk and metal music for my own good, so my moods not that great, and it's affecting everything. Just feeling kinda down. **

**I'll try and have another update up before December, I really like this story, so I want everything to be good. Sorry for any mistakes, and thanks to everyone who's reviewed, favourited and followed this story. You guys rock :) **

**Enjoy**

* * *

The air was freezing. Quinn shoved her hands deeper into her pockets, her bag digging into her shoulder. Rachel was still clinging to her arm, and she was surprised the leather jacket wasn't freezing the diva's face.

"We're almost at your place," She whispered, and Rachel's face popped out of the leather for a second.

"You said that 10 minutes ago. Quinn, I'm sure you have a perfectly good explanation for walking all the way back to my house, and I can't wait to hear it, but please… just tell me when we're five minutes away." Rachel's breath hung in the air and fell harshly. She shivered, pressing her face back to the cold leather, keeping up pace with Quinn.

"Alright," Quinn whispered, her lips frozen. She looked down at herself, shrouded in black and the grey makeup long gone. "We're at the stoplights,"

Off Rachel ran like a rocket. She jumped over the fence separating the main road from the house lined street, and ran up the familiar cream-coloured garage door. Quinn shook her head, smiling, and followed suit, hopping the fence and running. She arrived breathlessly at the front door just as Rachel had barreled through it.

"That was a quick run," Quinn laughed, stepping into the warm house, putting one hand on Rachel's pink cheek. She giggled as the brunette jumped back, shivering.

"Quinn, your hands are freezing!" Rachel wrapped her arms around herself, sniffling. Quinn winked at her, slowly nodding as she got closer to the small figure.

"Ok, ok, I'm sorry." Quinn hugged Rachel tightly. She felt the brunette curl inside her arms to the warmth, and she jumped back as Rachel's freezing hands were on her bare back. "What was that?"

"Just a little joke," Rachel giggled, watching as Quinn pulled her shirt back down, and slid off the leather jacket. She was a little worried that Quinn would be upset about that; she had never dared to put her hands under Quinn's shirt, under any circumstances. The smile on Quinn's face put her fears to rest.

"Continue doing that, but remember that I'm here the entire weekend, and you could end up with ice in your bra every morning," Quinn slung the bag over her shoulder and kissed Rachel quickly. The house was quiet, but it was relaxing. Quinn was sick of dealing with adults this week, and yes, she realized that thought made her sound about 3 years old.

"I hope you know how to cook dinner, because all I can manage is breakfast." Rachel immediately dug through the pots and pans under the counter, trying to find something useful. She was tired and yawning, but starving.

"Of course I know how to cook." Quinn picked up the phone, dialing the nearest pizza place and smiling as Rachel looked up back at her. "Hi, can I have two small pizzas, one vegetarian and one with pepperoni and mushrooms…"

Rachel shook her head at the solution, and headed to the small compact radio sitting on the counter. She knew she must've left it there sometime last week, but there were so many stereos and CD's littering the place that it wasn't uncommon. She pressed play, remembering how she had left the Grease soundtrack in there, but she really didn't care. It was always nice to see Quinn dance to these soundtracks. She sometimes seriously questioned her girlfriend's taste in music.

She snaked her arms around Quinn's waist as the blonde finished up with the pizza guy, looking up into the hazel eyes. Her lip brushed against the blonde's. She ran her fingers through Quinn's hair, biting slightly at Quinn's lips. She loved this, she really did. The dazzling effect of a new romance certainly hadn't worn off yet, and at this point Rachel was begging that it never would.

Quinn clicked off the phone and tossed it onto the counter, swaying along with Rachel to the song. She slipped her hand into the brunette's, pulling her closer with her other. She couldn't ever remember a time when she had done this, actual dancing. She leaned her head against Rachel's inhaling the coconut scent and grinned. "I've never done this before."

"Done what?" Rachel laughed as Quinn spun her around, catching her again. She pulled the blonde in for another kiss, easing her tongue slowly in Quinn's mouth. Quinn let out a small moan, a motion for Rachel to keep going. Her flustered hands rested on Quinn's cheeks, and the blonde had hers resting on Rachel's waist still. With every breath, she inhaled Quinn's vanilla perfume, the gentle hands on her waist slowly moving upward, but Rachel stopped them.

She cupped Quinn's hands in her own, still kissing the blonde, and moved them back down to her hips. She didn't want to seem like a prude, or that she should be stopping Quinn in any way, but she didn't want to lead on the blonde right now. She was too tired for this kiss to develop into anything more; when she and Quinn did consummate, she wanted to be fully awake.

"I'm sorry, I thought…" Quinn began to say as Rachel pulled back. She looked up at the blonde's flushed cheeks and cupped them.

"It's not your fault. Quinn, I don't want to lead you into anything more tonight. I'm tired and still frozen from that walk. Maybe tomorrow." Rachel gave her a quick kiss, chiding herself immediately thinking of sex. She knew Quinn's intention weren't that at all, but she still wasn't entirely comfortable with the idea of someone touching her.

Quinn bit her lip. She knew she should've kept her hands down. She can't afford to let Rachel think that anything can happen between them. Crap… she's being so selfish by keeping Rachel in this relationship, but she can't push her away. She's gotten so used the idea that someone loves her, she cannot push them away. She already knows that Rachel will run away when she finds out about her… condition.

"I… ok…" Quinn whispered, kissing Rachel softly again. They had the whole fucking house at their disposal, but Quinn wanted Rachel beside her all the time. It would be better if Rachel were in her arms, all the time. She wanted to fall asleep holding the brunette, and wake up to Rachel kissing her. She was a dreamer… and she fucking hated it.

"Now what were you saying you had never done?" Rachel hugged her tightly, feeling the protective embrace cover her again. It was warming her up, and she absolutely loved it. She couldn't think of what the blonde was hinting at though; the song and dance were so gloriously simple, it was romantic.

"I've never actually danced with a girl, or anyone really." Quinn knew she was blushing, her cheeks felt hot as hell. Rachel pulled away and looked at her, amazed with this discovery.

"You're kidding," Rachel was stunned. She knew that Quinn had been with anyone else seriously before, but she had no idea to what extent. "You have had absolutely no experience with anyone?"

"Is that a problem?" Quinn twirled Rachel around, holding tightly to the smaller hand, trying to shove out of her head the thoughts of inadequacy. She could be the happiest person in the whole bloody world, and she would still think she didn't deserve it.

Rachel shook her head, getting dizzy from the twirl. She gripped Quinn's forearms as she stopped. "Of course not." The doorbell rang, breaking the awkward silence, and Quinn fished through her pocket, digging out some change. "I'll pay." Rachel pressed her own crinkled 20 into Quinn's hand, and pushed the blonde towards the door.

Maybe it was a little awkward that she was Quinn's first. She knew a lot was at stake here, she couldn't afford for any experience to be mediocre or second-rate. She knew that Quinn wouldn't be comparing her to anyone, but she still wanted it to be perfect. They did, after all, have an entire house to themselves for the entire weekend. Things might get interesting.

Rachel pulled open the door to the delivery boy, and took the pizza boxes. She took the money from Quinn and shoved it into his hand, yelling keep the change before slamming the door. The smell of the pizza had her mouth watering; she chose to ignore the fact that she had just given the delivery guy a 10 dollar tip. She dropped the boxes on the table and opened them, looking at the cheese on the normally plain pizza.

"Quinn, I can't have this," She spun around to face the blonde with her box on the counter, already stuffing her face with the food. Quinn twirled a piece of melted cheese around her finger, nibbling on it.

"Why not? It's vegetarian, no meat." Quinn took another bite of the warm food. It felt good to have something other than ramen noodles and fruit for once.

"I'm vegan, there's a difference. Cheese comes from milk, which in turn comes from cows." Rachel pouted, her hands on her hips as Quinn rolled her eyes.

"You should eat the cheese. Cows can explode if they aren't milked, so by eating that cheese, you'll be helping a farmer milk a cow and save its life. Isn't that's what vegan and vegetarian stuff is all about?" Quinn smiled broadly before taking a large bite out of the pizza, finishing the first slice.

"That's a lie. I've googled it." Rachel looked at the melted cheese, her stomach growling. She was sure she could make herself go into the fridge and cook up something, but this did look good.

"You then have two options." Quinn pulled out another few slices before closing the box. "You can not eat the pizza; spend a few more minutes making one of your tofu meals, and eating that, therefore wasting this delicious meal that's already hot." Quinn peeled off a small piece of the cheese, eating it slowly. "Or you peel off the cheese and give it to me. Enjoy your bread and vegetables. You should be open to new things, honestly. Say yes; say yes to this cheesy goodness."

"I feel that you're trying to lead this to something more." Rachel picked up a piece of pizza from the box, trying to count the extra time she would need on the treadmill.

"And you have a dirty mind." Quinn appeared beside Rachel and yanked the food out of her hands, taking a bite of the vegetarian pizza. Rachel lunged for it, grimacing as Quinn raised it above her head. "MMM, this is delicious!"

"Give it to me!" Rachel jumped a few times, before giving up and going back to the box, which Quinn pulled out from under her. "Quinn! I'm hungry!"

"But you're a vegan, you can't have cheese. Isn't that what you've been saying?" Quinn gasped as a large piece of tomato sauce slid off the piece above her head and landed in her hair. She shoved the slice and box into Rachel's hand, grinning as she used a napkin to clean her head.

"That's what I like to call karma." Rachel sunk her teeth into the food, her stomach growling louder than before. She grinned as Quinn tried to fling the sauce towards her face but failed. "You shouldn't play with your food Quinn," That time the lump of sauce hit its target.

"Yes, but look at the amazing aim I have," Quinn smiled, standing close beside Rachel. She kissed the brunette softly, wiping away the red sauce with her thumb. Rachel's soft skin sent goose bumps up her own. She loved the feeling she got from these moments, the soft feeling of love. To know there was a feeling like this made her fearful to lose it.

She exhaled softly as their lips parted again, looking down at Rachel's red lips. The brunette was beautiful, there was no denying it. Quinn seemed to know that she would never let anything happen to Rachel, never. She opened her mouth slightly as Rachel broke off a slice of pizza, feeding it to her. Sucking lightly on Rachel's fingertips, Quinn brought her hand to cover the brunette's and she stayed frozen in position. The brunette tasted good.

She really shouldn't be doing this. This was so sensual. Rachel couldn't be strung along because Quinn knew she could never give herself to the brunette. Rachel couldn't love her… everyone in her life had told her that no one would ever love her in that way. Yet, she was hearing something… or feeling something. There was this little voice inside her that was telling her there was a chance. She couldn't believe this voice, but it felt nice. Maybe a small part of her believed Rachel would love her… a small part… thank god for this long top.

Rachel blushed at Quinn's action, feeling incredibly stimulated. This was gentle, this wasn't Finn's definition of gentle; this was soft and tender. She smiled softly as Quinn's hand covered hers, the warmth shooting down her arms. This was entirely new, and she hoped that Quinn planned on acting on whatever she was insinuating.

Quinn let go of Rachel's fingers, and looked into the chocolate eyes, seeing such love, such tenderness. She intertwined her fingers with the brunette's, looking not at her imperfections, but at Rachel's beauty. She could've looked at the thin red lines on the top of her hand that were showing through the concealer, but she really couldn't care less. Rachel's hands were soft, and smooth… and perfect. She didn't see scars on the brunette's fingertips, she saw the clear skin.

Another kiss stolen as Rachel leaned in again, the cherry flavoured lip balm rubbing off on her. She didn't want to let go. This sounded like a sappy romantic movie, but Quinn really didn't care. The brunette tasted like cherries and smelled of coconuts, and it was intoxicating.

"I love you," Quinn whispered, her voice gravelly, their foreheads pressed together. "I love you so much, Rach, you don't understand it." She felt more tears starting. She was so fucked up it wasn't funny. This was supposed to be something romantic, not something sad as hell. She shouldn't be crying; if she was going to beat herself up, she really shouldn't be in this position in the first place.

"I love you too Quinn," Rachel kissed her softly again, seeing the tears run down Quinn's pale cheeks. "I love you," Rachel brought Quinn's hand to her lips and gently kissed the top, seeing the thin red lines for the first time. They certainly didn't look fresh, and Rachel withheld a sigh. She desperately wanted to know what happened, and she doubted there wasn't a spot on Quinn covered in these scars. The blonde must be skilled in using concealer. She let go of Quinn's other hand, running her fingers slowly over the red line, pushing back Quinn's shirt sleeve to reveal more. Rachel felt the tears stain in her eyes, wishing she could erase all of these things, erasing the pain they dealt.

"Rach…" Quinn put a hand on her shoulder, trying to steady her, but she couldn't. She covered her eyes, trying to stop crying, and kissed Quinn's hand. As childish as it seemed, Rachel remembered how her fathers would kiss her cuts when she was younger; she remembered how a bit of affection made her feel better. She wanted to pass this on. "Rach, calm down… Please,"

"I… I … can't…" Rachel tensed as she felt Quinn hug her. Why was she being so coy about it? Quinn needed help, she truly did, but at this point Rachel felt so useless. "Quinn… please tell me what happened… please…" She felt herself break down and Quinn caught her as her legs gave out.

"I will, but Rach, you have to calm down a little." Quinn held her up, quickly pulling down her shirt sleeve. Her hand gripped Rachel's arms as she held up the brunette, seeing the pale red scars, feeling an unbelievable urge to claw at them, make them bleed again. "What do you want to know?"

-.-.-

Quinn cracked open a can of Coke, sitting on the Berry's couch. Rachel had been upstairs sleeping for the past few hours, bawling before curling up to her and falling asleep. She had left her there; Rach looked so peaceful, she couldn't wake her up.

The room was so different from her parents' place. It was warm… it just looked warm. Like some little kid had run through it and messed it, saying 'I live here'. It looked lived-in. The couches were messy, there were blankets and carpets and Quinn could make out a few stains on the fabrics. She stood up and stood on the fireplace, looking at the baby pictures of Rachel in every freaking frame.

Every picture had the young Rachel smiling into the camera, messy as anything, but happy. Quinn laughed at the only odd one. Rachel must've been five or something, but her hair was in a thousand little pigtails sticking up over her head and she had paint on her cheeks. She wasn't looking at the camera either. Quinn shook her head, smiling and got back down. Only Rachel would think it would be good to wear her hair like that, even at five.

Hell, maybe all little kids were allowed to do that. She wouldn't know. For the longest time she wasn't allowed to anything with hers, just wear it at elbows length, no bangs, nothing. It was so boring, and predictable, and it was her leash. It was what kept her at arm's length to Russell.

Quinn grabbed a pillow, hugging it against her chest as she sipped the Coke. She walked around the Berry's lower level, looking at everything. In the other room there was another TV with an Xbox, which Quinn was surprised at. She doubted Rachel touched the thing though, because the games she saw were shooters. She sat down in front of an ancient record player and started flipping through the records stored below it. This was something she was never allowed to touch, her parents had one too. It was a "collectable" and was a guaranteed hit if she went anywhere near the damn thing.

There was an old Streisand record under the needle; she doubted this thing was being saved for money. The covers were also a little worn and faded. More stuff that looked used, she fucking loved it here. This house wasn't those spotless fake things you saw in magazines, it was actually half decent.

Her phone buzzed in her back pocket, and she fished it out. Brittany texted again. Quinn shook her head, smiling. She hadn't seen the tall blonde all day. She flipped through her contacts before reading it. Brittany and Rachel… how interesting. She had deleted that Sam guy a month ago, they never talked anymore.

_Hey Quinn! What's up? _Quinn rolled her eyes at Brittany's enthusiasm.

_With Rachel, kinda busy, talk later. _Quinn hammered out a response and tossed her phone onto the couch, hoping it wouldn't buzz again. When Rachel woke up, she had to think of something that didn't give away her current situation. She didn't like lying to Britt, mostly because it was way too easy, but now really wasn't the time.

So many fucking pictures of Rachel! Quinn moved into the main hall again, looking at the more recent photos. She picked up one frame, and turned it around, looking at the backing nearly popping off. Prying it open, the picture fell out and Quinn picked it up. Rachel looked gorgeous in it, in a classy black dress, her hair up, makeup done and everything. She unfolded the rest and scowled. Stupid, ugly, oaf of an ex.

Quietly, she ripped Finn's face off the picture and slid Rachel back into the frame. Balling it into her fist, Quinn sipped the Coke as she went into the kitchen and tossed it into the trash. That fat bastard didn't deserve Rachel, not that she's much better. She had more issues than you could count, and she had managed to bag Rachel… how the hell did that work out? She knew better than to question her good luck, and she put the Coke on the counter, running her finger around the rim.

The kitchen smelled like pizza, and the barely touched vegetarian one sat on the table, opened. If she didn't hate peppers so much, she might have some, but her stomach was a bundle of nerves. Rachel wanted to know something, and honestly, how much could she say it? Quinn exhaled, pouring the rest of the drink down the sink, and running the water to wash it away. She stuck her hands under the tap, and shook them dry, using her top as a towel.

Quinn yawned, unaware of how late it was. If Rachel woke up now, she wouldn't fall back asleep until at least 2 a.m. She left the kitchen again, swimming in her own thoughts and heading up the stairs quietly. The carpet the Berry's had on the stairs was wearing thin, and Quinn felt like crying herself. Rachel had told her how she didn't have a lot of friends as a kid, so this big house would've been used for Rachel to play by herself. Why couldn't she have been born in this town, to a different set of parents?

Wow, Quinn never thought like this. She had given up on 'what ifs' when she was about 3. Besides, who's to say that she wouldn't have been just another bitch to Rachel if she didn't have such dark demons? Maybe it was just two outcasts in love, and when Rachel did hit Broadway, she'd drop Quinn for a more famous actress…

Quinn slowly opened the door to Rachel's room, seeing the brunette still sleeping peacefully on the bed. If she had any sense, she'd leave and skip town. Rachel deserved so much better, she just didn't know it yet. Her emotions were getting the best of her though, because she went inside and shut the door. Sitting on the edge of the bed, her makeup all washed off, Quinn ran her fingers through Rachel's hair, kissing the brunette's forehead softly.

"Mmm," Rachel grumbled, still tired. Quinn grinned, and twisted their fingers together, watching her girlfriend stir. "Quinnnn…" Rachel slurred, tugging for the blonde. Quinn obliged, and lay down beside the smaller girl, kissing her softly.

"Good evening Princess," Quinn pressed their foreheads together, trying to hold back tears.

"Where were you? I was cold," Rachel wrapped her arms around Quinn's waist, pulling her closer and snuggling against the blonde.

"I was just downstairs, getting a drink," Quinn stroked Rachel's hair gingerly. "Rach, can I ask you something?"

"Does it have to do with werewolves?" Rachel slurred slightly, looking groggily up at Quinn.

"What? No, it doesn't have to do with werewolves, why would you think that?" Quinn giggled, stopping only when Rachel huffed.

"I had a dream where you were a werewolf, and you started eating me but it didn't hurt… I think you ripped off my legs, but I didn't feel anything… Then we were in snow, and you went back to being a human and saw me…" Rachel whispered, feeling more exhausted then ever as Quinn drew small circles on her back. "And you started bawling… and then you woke me up…" Rachel yawned, trying to decipher the dream, but she had no idea. Honestly, it was just crazy.

"I'm not a werewolf Rach; I'll never do something like that." Quinn yawned, feeling herself get sleepy too. Apparently the caffeine in Coke acted like a sleeping pill.

"Anyway," Rachel got more comfortable in Quinn's arms, her head pressed against the blonde's collarbone. "What did you want to ask me?"

"You know how you said you're going to Broadway one day?" Quinn kissed the top of Rachel's head, getting comfortable on the pillow.

"Yeah, and how you'll come with me?" Her name in lights, and Quinn beside her. That was her dream.

"You promise you won't ditch me for another girl, one who… I don't know, makes more money, or looks nicer, or something?" Quinn stuttered.

That did it. That woke her right up. Rachel sat up, pulling out of Quinn's arms, but still holding her hand. "What makes you think that I would ever do that?"

"I… I don't know… I'm just… I figure you deserve someone better than me, and I guess I'm just afraid you'll find her on Broadway." Quinn yawned, Rachel holding her hand so tightly that nails were cutting into her palm.

"Quinn, you have to stop this." Rachel put her face beside Quinn's, still sitting. "This… speaking pattern… you have told me that I deserve better so many times, and I still say that I deserve you. You're perfect. I hate that you say things like this Quinn." A light went off in Rachel's head, and Quinn saw it. Fuck. "That's what I wanted to ask. Why did we have to walk all the way here from your house when we have a perfectly good car?"

Quinn sucked in her breath. If she was going to tell Rachel a lie, it might as well have some truth to it. "Well… you know how I live on my own?"

"Yeah, I've noticed that." Rachel looked down at the blonde. Quinn was looking directly at the ceiling, looking as though she wanted it to collapse.

"Well, there's a reason for that." Quinn wanted Rachel to curl one arm around her waist, but she didn't deserve it. Rachel should stay at distance for this.

"I also assumed that. I haven't seen too many teenagers living completely on their own." Rach finally lay down beside her, but Quinn still didn't want them to touch.

"It has to do with my dad." Quinn sucked in her breath, trying not to freeze over at the thoughts of the belt against her skin. Blood pooling around her back as she tried to breath. "I moved out because of him."

It was silent in the bedroom, Rachel's hand inching towards Quinn's, trying to intertwine their fingers, but Quinn pushed her away each time. This was just the beginning, Rachel had barely cracked the surface of what was lying underneath Quinn, and this was how she was reacting already.

"What happened Quinn?" Rachel crossed her arms over her chest, looking at the gold stars on the ceiling.

"He…" Quinn blinked slowly, feeling numb. This wasn't happening. This shouldn't be happening. It was horrible that it was happening. She couldn't prepare herself endlessly for this moment, but it would still be absolute hell. "He… Rach… he… he hit me…"

That's all she could manage before she felt the tears hit her. Rachel went silent, and for the moment, she felt like she had alienated the only person she had going for her. She didn't push Rachel away as the protective arms surrounded her, but she didn't dig any deeper either. Rachel didn't need to know anything else, not yet.

"He would take his belt… and… just whack me with it… everywhere…" Quinn whispered, trying to control herself as Rachel held her. This was torture; she didn't deserve to be touched, but she couldn't pull away. "I… I doubt there's a part of me… that… that isn't… so scarred… It was… it was every…damn night… I… I… I couldn't do anything right… He told me… how I was…. I was worthless…" Quinn balled her hand in a fist, holding herself back from pounding against Rachel's chest. "I… I couldn't do anything… he wouldn't… let me… I was this stupid… stupid… little kid… and he had this metal… big metal buckle… he would crack… crack it over my back… and my stomach… and my arms and thighs and hands… Whenever he was mad… it was all the time…"

Rachel stroked the blonde hair softly as she felt Quinn tense. The blonde's body went rigid, and she was afraid to move, the way Quinn was clinging to her shirt. She could read the silent pleas emitting from Quinn's body language, and she did the same repetitions as Quinn spoke in staccato.

"God… Rach… you shouldn't… shouldn't be hearing this… I'm sorry…" Quinn held back the lump in her throat as the tears softly flowed.

"Don't apologize Quinn, please don't." Rachel hated herself for how her girlfriend sounded so broken, like she was slowly dying inside. "You are so incredibly strong, and brave… don't apologize. You have nothing to apologize for…" Rachel brushed the blonde bangs away, and gently kissed Quinn's forehead, noticing how the blonde was barely keeping her eyes opened. "Quinn?"

Quinn didn't hear her, or she did but she didn't make note of Rachel's presence. Her eyes were stinging, and she was so tired. She shouldn't have said anything to Rachel; now the brunette will want to tell people, and find her "help". She didn't need help… that was a fucking lie. She needed all kinds of therapy, but she'd never go. What's the point in fixing yourself if no one will ever want you?

"Rach…" Quinn murmured, yawning.

"Yes?" God, she hated how the brunette sounded so ready to help.

"Don't tell anyone about this…"

"But Qui…"

"I'm serious Rach, just don't." Quinn yawned again, allowing her rigid body to relax inside her girlfriend's arms as she fell asleep.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

_It's way to dark in here for my liking. I rub open my eyes, but I can't see a damn thing. I can hear someone else breathe, but I have no idea who. Maybe it's my breath, just echoing around this dresser. Cinderella… really? I'm thinking about that doll again? Well that doll isn't here; she's at the last house I "lived" at. I wish she was here though._

_I stand up, and stretch. I'm in that stupid dresser, but I don't punch it or hit my head. God, I'm puny. How old am I even? I sit down again, moving over a little and I shove my hand out. Fuck! Dammit! That's the worst pain I've ever felt in a while. I think my hand's bleeding, so I lick my knuckles and taste the blood. I shake my head, and run my hands through my hair. It's so long. Man, I don't even remember it being this long. _

_Stupid light! Definitely in a dresser. I can see the light pouring in through the crack and I look down at my hands. They're unscathed. We're talking clean skin, no little red lines. I don't remember ever looking like this. I try opening the doors, but they're locked. I should have expected that. I look through them._

_No… No… This isn't happening… hell no… Rachel's lying on the bed, as normal as anything. She's wearing a blue t-shirt, but it's bloody… and there's a crown on her head. That's bloody too. Her hair is matted down, and I can't believe what I'm looking at. How did she even get here? Rach, you need to leave. Now, I'm serious, just run. I call to her. _

"_Princess!" A kiddy voice comes out of my mouth, but for once, I don't care. I just pound against the wardrobe. "Princess, wake up! He'll come! You have to leave!" I cry loudly, but she doesn't wake up. She only stirs a little, looking worried before turning over. I can feel my stomach drop. She has a fucking noose around her neck, keeping her to the bed. _

_I back away from the doors and cover my head when I hear the footsteps. I must sound like a goddamn boggart in this wardrobe, still don't give a shit. If he hurts me, it'll be better than him hurting Rachel. Anything's better than that. His hand slams against the door, trying to shut me up. It worked, I hate admitting that, but I just press myself against the back of the dresser. I'm alone in here, without any clothes or things to hide me. If he opens the doors, I'm not sure who's more screwed, me or Rachel. _

"_You horrid little thing" He hisses at me, and I cower. I hate this. I don't want to do this, but I can't control myself. If I could, I'd burst through the doors and strangle him, but I can't. "You don't know how to shut up, do you? You're going to be punished for this, but I have a different punishment." The words are deep and hateful and they scare me. This must be when I was really young. I don't even remember my first punishments, but I guess they were being locked in this damn dresser. Never liked the thing, but its familiar. _

_I look out of the crack again, when I know he's gone. I want to break the skin on my hands, I don't feel like me. Those little red lines look familiar, and I feel like I'm out of my body. He pulls the covers off Rachel, and I can feel myself whispering. "Princess, run Princess, please run," over and over. Rachel still doesn't move, she can't, not with that bloody noose around her neck. _

_I hear myself scream so loudly I can't think. He grabs that fucking rope and pulls it, slapping Rachel right across the face. I press my face so close against the door that it will definitely leave an indentation. He's hitting her, he's hitting the princess._

"_Stop it!" I scream, my throat burns and I sound like a pack-a-day smoker, but I don't care. He tugs harder, and Rach gasps. My hand stings as I slam the wardrobe again and it bleeds. I rub it on my cheeks as I just watch him…_

_He flips Rachel over… god, I can't do this. I look away, but I look back when I hear Rachel scream. The skirt is over her head, and all I can see is him… No… I slam myself against the back wall of the dresser. This is my fault… this is all my fault. I should've never said anything to her… but I fucking did. I did, and he found out. Fuck…_

_I hear her scream, and call out for her dads' to help. I hear the smacks of what I assume are his palm against her skin. I can't look through the crack in the dresser doors; I can't…does that make me a horrible person? If so, god… I'm so, so sorry Rach. Her screams are swimming around my head, my temples throbbing _

_Fuck that, sorry's don't cut it now. She's wrecked… I wrecked her just like I wrecked myself. I'm digging my grave, and I can't even watch the gravedigger do the job. I press my face against my palms, trying not to cry as I shove myself in the corner far from the door. I can't do this… I can't… I've tried, and I guess it was good while it lasted, but I can't finish this. Blood from my hands smears over my face and I must look like a weird vampire child. I'm a freak… _

_I don't hear anything anymore, just big looming shadows, and I curl into a tighter ball. I close my eyes, but then I hear laughing. Stupid, stupid laughing. Loud and crazy, angry as hell. Then it silences… and I hear Rachel's screams. I can see starts because my eyes are hammered shut, but those sounds are surrounding me. Her screams… his laughs… I hate it… I hate him… I hate him for what he did to me… but I can't change it now… _

_I have to end it… I have to… Rach has to stay safe…_

-.-.-

"Quinn!" She heard Rachel's voice calling to her, but she ignored it, tossing and turning again.

"QUINN!" Rachel called louder, and Quinn sleepily blinked. That voice broke her from the laughter going on inside her head, but she still could still hear the echo. She rubbed her eyes slowly, noticing Rachel's hands press on her shoulders.

"What? What's wrong?" Quinn focuses on Rachel's face hovering above her, somewhat hazy in the dim light. Quinn felt her stomach sink as she saw the shining pink skin around Rachel's eye, and noticed the pin pricks of blood on her fist. She jumped off the bed fast, knocking Rachel back on the mattress as she hit her head on the floor. "Rach, oh god… I'm so sorry…" Quinn cried.

"It's ok," Rachel grabbed Quinn's hand, and pulled her, with brute force, back on to the bed. "It's ok; I know you didn't mean it. You were sleeping and it was an impulse." Rachel grasped Quinn's hands in her own, trying to make the blonde look at her. "Quinn, after you woke me up in such a way… you were moaning. I couldn't understand it all, but I heard pleading." Rachel sucked in her breath when Quinn moved away. "What happened Quinn?"

"Nothing Rach, don't worry about it." Rachel couldn't touch her, not now, not when there had to be distance. "Beside, I already forgot about it."

"Quinn…" Rachel motioned for the blonde as Quinn stood, messing up her hair, "Where are you going?"

"I'm going in the guest room tonight," Quinn ignored Rachel's cries and shut the door, leaving the brunette to her own devices. She looked into the empty hallway, out at the moonlight pouring in through the windows. A full moon was in the sky, and Quinn looked up at it, trying to see if she could find any constellations.

That big night sky had always been her friend, made her think about things. She couldn't speak well to anyone with a heartbeat, but she could speak her mind to just about anything that didn't. Quinn pressed her hands against the cold glass panes, remembering herself as a little girl, lifting her windows and dropping down onto the grass. Some houses had a trellis, some didn't; either way, she always went out at night. It was just something she did.

She didn't feel right, leaving Rachel alone in the bedroom when she should be explaining everything to the brunette. She couldn't pry her hands off the glass though, and she looked up at the sky, seeing a few twinkling stars. For the first time since she had left the old house, she really wished she had that old Cinderella doll. She wanted to show it to Rachel, and keep it safe for her kids… if she had any. It would've been her only heirloom… but it was gone.

She lifted a hand off the cold glass and pressed it to her cheek, sending chills down her spine. Drawing it back, she was honestly surprised she didn't see blood. That dream was so realistic. She pressed her had hard against the glass, clenching her teeth in an effort not to scream. She had to go back to Rachel. The brunette deserved an explanation.

Peeling her hands away from the glass, Quinn looked back into the dark hallway, seeing the lamplight shine out from under Rachel's door. She slowly walked towards it, knocking lightly on the wooden door. More than anything, she was afraid Rachel would be angry with her, but she couldn't shy away from this thing now that it was in the open.

"Come in," Rachel's voice was weak, and Quinn knew she had been crying, but she went in slowly.

"Come with me," Quinn slipped her hand into Rachel's not even sitting down on the bed before pulling at the brunette.

"Quinn, what are we doing at 2 am?" Rachel aimlessly followed Quinn down the steps, noticing they were still in their costumes. Quinn's shirt was wrinkled and covered in stains only visible through the dull glow, but she still looked beautiful.

"It's a surprise, just find some candles." Quinn jumped over their bags as she ran into the family room, her veins pumping with adrenaline. This was going to be fun. She pulled the blankets from their natural couch positions before bursting into the kitchen and pulling out a box of popsicles from the freezer. Onto the pile went a lighter and a tablecloth.

"I still don't understand this…" Rachel looking at everything that Quinn was balancing, the lighter wedged between her teeth as she fumbled for the door handle.

"Dn wrry, ah know wt ah'm doin," Quinn mumbled, gripping the lighter as she pulled open the front door. The front porch was moonlit, and Quinn's first instinct was to get the radio. This would've been the perfect set up for a movie scene, but whatever… it didn't matter to her now. She spit out the lighter and dumped the blankets on the drive-way, shivering in the t-shirt.

She spread out the tablecloth, and took the candles from Rachel, trying to spread the 7 out evenly around the tablecloth. She noticed how Rachel took the blanket and covered herself in it, clearly freezing. Quinn warmed her fingers at the flickering flame, and started lighting the candles, the weak fires burning in their cylinders.

"See," Quinn turned around, spreading her arms and balanced in her sock feet. "I told you I know what I'm doing."

"Quinn," Rachel shook her head, smiling as she picked up the blankets and huddled around Quinn, "This is the most romantic thing anyone's ever done for me" A cold gust of wind blew around them, the candles flickering before burning brighter. "And this is possibly the coldest I've ever been."

"C'mere Princess, I'll warm you up." Quinn laughed as she wrapped her arms around Rachel, sitting down on the blanket with the brunette on her lap. She pulled over the box of popsicles, and handed one of the rocket pops to Rachel.

"Popsicles? In this cold? I'm going to freeze," Rachel's hands shook from cold as she grabbed the stick and slowly ate it. They sat in a comfortable silence, Rachel happy in Quinn's arms as they ate their way through a box of popsicles. After Quinn demolished about 4, she had to ask, "Aren't you cold?"

"Not really," Quinn rested her head on Rachel's shoulder, closing her eyes at the bright moonlight. "I spent a lot of time outside at night as a kid; I guess I built immunity."

"Was that because of your father?" Rachel's question cut through the soft night like a sword. Quinn sucked in her breath; clearly Rachel had intruded into unknown territory. She should've known better.

"Yeah," The word surprised both girls. The night air was silent; the only exception was the call of a morning dove. "I really didn't have a choice… He was controlling in every way possible. I couldn't get away with anything, or I would get the belt." Quinn bit her lip every time she felt a few tears brimming "That's where all this red lines are from."

Rachel didn't know how to respond to that. How was she to respond without sounding ignorant or uncaring? A part of her wanted to cry for Quinn's pain, and a large part of her was numb. How could someone do that to a child? It didn't make sense… "How long did he do that to you?" Rachel reached up and brushed her fingers against the fringes of Quinn's bangs, the blonde resting her head on her shoulder.

"I don't remember. It just seemed a natural thing." Quinn exhaled, chewing nervously on the Popsicle stick. "I honestly don't remember when my hands were ever clear. I just always had them."

Rachel wanted Quinn to stop telling her this; she could feel the tears run down her face. She knew she had to let Quinn continue; this was an incredible effort at opening up. It also confirmed her suspicions. She opened her mouth to say something, but all that came out was a squeak.

"Princess… I'm sorry," Quinn held her tightly as she dropped the half eaten Popsicle. Her hands flew to her face as she tried to cover up her tears. She shouldn't be crying, not when Quinn was the one hurting. She couldn't stop it. "Don't cry Rach, I'm fine. It's ok, I survived everything, and I met you. I think I made out like a bandit."

Rachel giggled through the tears as Quinn poked her sides, tickling her. "Seriously Rach, how did I get lucky enough to bag someone like you? I'm not that great…"

"You are Quinn," Rachel rested her head on the blonde's, still crying. She pulled one of Quinn's hands in front of her, fingering the scars lightly. She closed her eyes tightly as another gust of wind blew, blowing the blanket off them, gripping Quinn's hand tighter. "You're the nicest person I've ever met; you're gorgeous, inside and out; and I love you." Rachel kissed the top of Quinn's hand, the tears running hot on her cheeks.

"I love you too Rach," Quinn closed her eyes, leaning on Rachel's back. She would be perfectly happy to fall asleep right here, but she could feel the brunette freezing underneath her. "How about we go inside now? We've been out here for an hour, and you're freezing,"

"Yes please," Rachel blew out the candles, leaving the table-cloth and jars of melted wax on the driveway. Quinn stood up, the blankets pulled around her shoulders and she smiled as Rachel shivered.

"A little cold Princess?" Quinn pulled the blankets tighter around her, smirking at the look of exasperation on Rachel's face.

"Give me a blanket Quinn," Rachel grinned as Quinn picked her up, holding her wedding-style as they walked to the door. Rachel pressed her frozen cheek against Quinn's shoulder, pulling the blankets around her as well. "You really are the best Quinn, believe me."

Quinn smiled, gazing at the half-asleep brunette in her arms. She knew Rachel would keep up with these 'self-esteem boosters' for a while, and something was nagging her, saying she shouldn't have said anything. In comparison to the other secrets she had buried, what she revealed truly was nothing. Still, the brunette cared about her, and if Quinn wanted to keep her happy, and sane, she would keep her mouth shut. "Thanks Rach."


	10. Testify

**Hello everyone! As an apology for the previous chapter, I bring you this one, which is... I'm putting a warning on it. So anyways, it's a bit shorter than the others, but I didn't think it should be a long one, more a transition. Also, Russell won't meet Rachel just yet, but they will catch up later. What happened before was Quinn revealing what happened to her as a child, but only the beating. Nothing else, at all. There was no flashback.  
**

**So, thank you to those who took the time to review this story, and who took the time to read it. I love hearing feedback. **

**I would also like to mention that I don't know the male anatomy all too well, so I hope I wrote it alright.**

**Warning! Rape, child abuse, mental/physical abuse. All mistakes are mine  
**

**"updated note" I realize now what I wrote was fucking intense, and disturbing. So I can't stress the warning enough. If you want to skip it, skip it. It does play upon the build up, but I'll give you a quick summary of the flashback at the end.  
**

**Have a wonderful day/night/week!**

* * *

"How about tonight, we just stay in and give out candy?" Rachel sat down on the couch beside Quinn, sinking into the leather. The day had been quiet, filled with sweet nothings, and the old records playing loud enough to hear anywhere in the house.

"What happened to being so excited to go out?" Quinn wrapped an arm around Rachel, pulling the brunette closer to her. They could still hear an old Beastie Boys record playing in the background as Quinn fiddled with something on her phone. He was texting her, demanding to know where she was. Fuck that, she wasn't saying a damn word.

"I just don't feel like it tonight. I know that Halloween only comes once a year, and I'm already 16…" Rachel trailed off, closing her eyes and inhaling the lingering vanilla perfume. "I think I'd like it more just to give out candy tonight. My house usually gets a lot of trick-or-treaters, and I have an extra box of candy stored in the basement, so we can still have a little stash."

"I guess that's as much fun as going out and doing it ourselves…" Quinn smiled as Rachel thumped her gently in the arm. "Alright, alright. We don't have to go out tonight. However, I'm still wearing some costume when those kids start coming. It's Halloween."

"Obviously, I'm putting on something more elaborate as well." Rachel stood up from the couch, pulling Quinn with her to change the record. "Are you ok Quinn?"

"Yeah," Quinn snapped out of the slight daze and looked at Rachel. What if he came by? What if she was sitting there, holding Rachel and giving candy to these little kids and he just came and grabbed her, dragging her back to the car. Quinn tightened her grip around Rachel's waist, and put her head gently on the brunette's shoulder. "Why do you ask?"

"I don't know… you've just been a little quiet lately." Rachel twined her fingers into Quinn's hair, her nails getting caught in some of the tangles. Quinn had been silent as a grave since her revelation, and Rachel couldn't bring anything up without Quinn brushing it away or going into detail. She had failed miserably to compose herself so many times when Quinn described her scars.

The blonde's forearms were unmarked, but everything else had a red line which came with a story, many of which Quinn was not willing to tell. Rachel nuzzled her head against Quinn's looking again at the pale red lines on her fingers. Quinn had explained how her father would take a belt to her hands if she was loud as a little kid.

"Let's make a fort." Rachel turned her head sharply at the blonde's words.

"What?" Quinn couldn't be serious. Frankly, she had never made a fort before, and she didn't want to seem stupid at the topic. They were also about 16 years old, did teenagers really do these things?

"Let's make a fort, with pillows and chairs and a ton of blankets." Quinn jumped off her girlfriend and up the stairs. Rachel sighed, shaking her head and smiling as Quinn's footsteps pounded down the stairs again. The blonde bob poked its way into the door way from the stairs. "Aren't you coming?"

"Of course," Rachel smiled, running up the stairs after Quinn and bursting into her room to see the blonde pulling the comforter and sheets off the mattress.

"There's not enough space in your room, we'll just set up shop in the family room." Quinn dragged the blankets and tossed them over the banister, Rachel following holding pillows. The cloth made a thud as it hit the floor, but neither girl cared. Rachel ran into the guest room, pulling the sheets off the bed as well and tossing them over the railing as quickly as possible while Quinn discovered the closet full of pillows.

"Do we have enough?" Rachel leaned against the wall smiling, out of breath. Quinn leaned over the railing, nodding.

"It should be enough to make without another trip upstairs, you also have those blankets on the couch so we should be good." Quinn nudged her gently, smiling. "You've honestly never made a fort before?"

"Not really. I couldn't put the blanket on top of the chairs properly, and apart from my fathers, no one was there to help." Rachel felt her mouth run dry, suddenly parched. With Quinn following her, she went into the bathroom and put her head under the tap.

"A bit thirsty?" Quinn smiled, tapping Rachel's behind. She giggled as Rachel spat the water onto the mirror.

"Yes, a little," Rachel rolled her eye, smiling still. Tonight was going to be a great night; she could feel it in her bones. The only Halloween she could remember that was completely miserable was the one where she was stuck inside with a nasty bit of pneumonia.

"There are drinks in the kitchen, let's go," Quinn grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her down the stairs. It was nice, to see Quinn this energetic. It wasn't just the past few days where she had been quiet and a bit sullen; the past week it was like she was on edge and Rachel, for the life of her, couldn't figure out why. It was like she was petrified of something.

"Wow, we made a mess…" Rachel surveyed the scattered pillows and blankets on the first floor. It was like a war zone.

"Too bad you don't have Nerf guns; we could start a fight here." Quinn giggled. Rachel was unsure how to take this. Quinn did flip sometimes, but this was strange.

"You seem extremely happy all of a sudden." Rachel started collecting the sheets and lugging them into the family room.

"I don't know, I feel… lighter." She wasn't lying. She was feeling like a small weight was off her chest, but it would soon be filled by its followers. Quinn was relieved Rachel hadn't gotten freaked out with her, but then again, she had just fed the brunette lies. Rachel couldn't run from lies. "I just feel happier, does that make sense?"

"Of course it does." Rachel nodded, screaming as Quinn tossed the sheets over her head, and she fell onto the carpet, swaddled in the damn things. She knew that Quinn must feel a little lighter; the weight of abuse had been pushing down on the blonde. She could understand that. Rachel found the edges of the sheets and emerged.

How long would it be until Quinn collapsed into herself again? How much time would it take for Quinn to shut her out again? Rachel sat on the floor, her cheeks flushed from being trapped in the heat, thinking. She thought too much for her own good, but she was worried. She was aware that Quinn felt inadequate; she was all too aware of that. She couldn't let the blonde fall back into self-destructive patterns. Not again.

"Could you help me with the chairs Rach?" Rachel's head perked up to see Quinn dragging the wooden chairs from the kitchen into the family room. The blonde smiled; seeing Rachel sitting there, looking flustered, the brunette looked cute.

"Sure," Rachel kicked the sheets off her legs, taking the chairs from Quinn and standing beside the blonde as she was deep in thought. "What are you thinking now?"

"How this should look… We could put the chairs beside the fireplace, and the couch, use the couch cushions for the head board, and stretch the sheets. The upper layer could be taunt, and then we can have draping inside." Quinn made the motions with her hands.

"Make the inside look like a harem?" Rachel immediately regretted saying that. Quinn turned pale before switching to a beet red, and stuttered out a response.

"Rach… um… if you want to do that, there's your bed upstairs…" Quinn bit her lip. Staying here, by themselves, it was a very bad idea. She couldn't have sex with Rachel, not now. Most likely, not ever. She couldn't expose herself that much to Rachel.

"I'm sorry; I didn't mean it that way." Rachel put her hands on hips, determined to stick to her resolution from before. "So, where do you want me to put the first of the chairs?"

Quinn cleared her thoughts, ignoring all her worries. "Put that beside the couch's armrest and the next should go beside the fireplace."

-.-

"All set for tonight?" Rachel handed Quinn the flashlight and the mirror as she checked her hair.

"Definitely, free candy and an excuse to dress up, why would this be a bad night?" Quinn had removed the battery from her phone and hidden it in one of the cupboards. He had been constantly texting her, calling her a few times as well, demanding to know where she was, telling her how she was going to get it when she did crawl home. Needless to say, she was a little on edge. "Like my mask?"

"It's a bandana and sunglasses, with a sailor hat and hoodie, what are you supposed to be exactly?" Rachel drew the mouse whiskers on her face, the low hanging sheets brushing against her head.

"Hollywood Undead, cross between two of the members. You don't know them," Quinn looked at the bandana that Rachel had managed to find and looked back at her. "You couldn't have at least found a plain black one?"

"Do I look like the type to wear bandanas? I got this one at a birthday party when I was younger, and I think the white Hello Kitty faces make you look very menacing." Rachel giggled as Quinn put it on, sliding on the sunglasses as well. "See what I mean?"

"I look like an idiot." Quinn rolled her eyes, but kept everything on anyways. She was shrouded from head to toe in black; sweater, gloves jeans and boots. She looked like she was about to kill someone, and she really might if she saw him. Or she would piss herself. One of the two. But hopefully, the red Mercedes wouldn't show up, and she could just eat chocolate all night.

"No you don't, you look like a sweetheart and I love you." Rachel pulled down the bandana and kissed Quinn softly, smiling at the taste of vanilla chapstick. "Now, can we go out and sit on the front porch. Tonight's going to be such a nice night and I want to spend it outside at least."

"Yeah, alright." Quinn got off Rachel's bed and waited for the mouse to follow her. She crept down the steps of the house, keeping the shaking bundle of nerves inside her. If he passed by, there would be absolutely no indication that she was underneath this heap of black. She grabbed the box of chocolate bars and opened the door to the sinking sun. The cold evening air blew silently, and Quinn shivered, remembering the want to go trick-or-treating as a little kid.

"Are you alright?" Rachel watched Quinn jump as she whispered the words. She didn't like how this night was turning. Maybe they shouldn't even be out here; she could just hide behind Quinn if they watched a horror movie or something along those lines.

"Fine, why do you ask?" Quinn ripped open the top of the box, taking out a small aero bar for herself. She nibbled on it under the bandana and handed rest to Rachel, afraid she'd eat half the box from her nerves.

"You seem nervous," Rachel shivered at the cold concrete, but didn't say anything. She tugged the grey sweater closer around her, rested her slippers on Quinn's lap. Maybe they shouldn't be doing this.

"Nothing's wrong Rach, you have to stop worrying." Quinn stuck her hand in the box again, nibbling on another one as the two watched the first group of kids getting closer. "How many munchkins come to your place for candy?"

"Quite a large amount. We're off of a main street, so that brings in the crowd and the houses around here are very done up." Rachel turned away from Quinn and grinned broadly to the gaggle of kids speaking the familiar phrase. She handed each 2 chocolates, and was especially kind to the little ones, who shyly looked into their pillowcases.

"They looked terrified of me," Quinn laughed, Rachel smiling at the sweet sound. It sounded relaxed and carefree.

"Well, minus the Hello Kitty, you look menacing." Rachel responded. It was true, she was completely covered up. No that saw her would recognize her as Quinn Fabray. The bandana covered her face and neck, sunglasses hid her tired eyes. The hoodie cast a shadow across her concealed features. "Did you see the box I have hidden in the basement for us later?"

"Yeah, Coffee Crisps and Jolly Ranchers." Quinn shook underneath the black cloak. "You know how to pick them." The wind offered a small gust, and both girls noticed how the pink like of sunlight had disappeared. Another band of children came ran across the Berry lawn to Rachel's steps and the brunette acknowledged each costume before handing them candy. Quinn softly took her hand after the group left. "You're very good with kids."

"I know, I used to volunteer at a daycare, and the children seemed to like me there. I guess I want to be a mother someday as well." Rachel played with some of the chocolate bars in the box. The two sat I silence for a while, lost in their own thoughts before a small girl came up the steps, shyly asking for candy before running back to her mother on the street. Rachel smiled as she handed 3 pieces to the girl, who pointed at the groups of kids past Rachel's house back with her mother.

"I always feel bad for kids like that." Rachel whispered, breaking the silence. "It was always lonely going trick-or-treating by myself, and to see other kids doing it as a group… I don't know, my heart just goes out to those little ones."

"Why didn't you ask your parents for a sibling? A baby brother or sister?" Quinn took another chocolate. Her nerves were eating away at her, and she hated it. Very few cars had come down the street, but there were the occasional ones that made her heart jump. Her stomach leapt and sank with every flash of headlights.

"I don't know, I think I did once, when I was very small. I wanted someone my own age though, someone to talk to." Rachel smiled softly. "And quite honestly, I liked being an only child and having my dads pay attention to only me." Rachel stretched, cracking her back before turning back to Quinn. "You don't have any siblings, correct?"

Quinn blinked at Rachel's question and was glad her face was masked. The tears ran silently down her face as she shook her head. "My Mother had a few miscarriages before me, and I was supposed to have a younger brother, but she had an abortion when I was about 4. I found this out years later." Quinn tasted the salty tears, trying to keep a plain appearance. She hated thinking about her would-be brother. It snapped her heart and made her violently angry with her parents. She would wonder if the boy would've looked like Father; if he would've been an athlete, or an artists; how it would be like to protect a living, breathing thing.

"I'm sorry," Rachel whispered, moving from her position on the steps and slipping easily into Quinn's arms, stunned. She knew Quinn was crying underneath the facial covering, because she could see the blonde quivering. "I'm sorry Quinn."

"Why are you sorry?" Quinn raised her voice louder than she meant to, regretting it. "You weren't the one who would have a brother; you weren't the one to get rid of the little guy either. You don't have to feel sorry." Quinn mumbled, keeping her breathing even, watching as Rachel smiled again at the kids coming up the walkway, handing them more candy from the large box.

"I know how much you probably hurt from this Quinn," Rachel hugged her tightly, both slightly shivering in the cool air. "I know that underneath your exterior, you care deeply about people, and I know you would've loved that brother with all you had. That's why I'm sorry. I'm sorry that you never got a chance to love that boy." Rachel entwined her fingers with Quinn's gloved ones. "I'm sorry that you feel pain over it, and I want to help take away that pain."

Rachel leaned in close to Quinn's ear, feeling the blonde tremble under her lips. "And I want to thank you for sharing what you did with me. Last night, when you revealed yourself to me, I want to thank you for trusting me that much. I'll be here for you Quinn, I promise you can tell me whatever you need to, because I will be with you to help you heal from whatever is eating at you."

Quinn let out her breath, realizing she had been holding it in all this time. She hyperventilated, grabbing Rachel's hand tightly, not wanting to let her go. She felt horrible, for not letting Rachel have any piece of her past; not that the brunette would want it. She knew she had to trust Rachel with her past, especially if they did want to move forward.

The red Mercedes driving with a lead foot past Rachel's driveway made her heart stop. She froze in Rachel's grip, keeping her eyes shut as soon as she saw the custom spinners.

Rachel looked up at her girlfriend, paralyzed in what appeared to be fear, and then at the car speeding down. She looked at the graying roots of the man in the front, and the ice blue eyes that scanned the houses. He looked like an angry soul, one that was never happy until everyone was suffering. Rachel felt a chill go up her spine, and shook her head. "Come on Quinn, let's just go inside and watch some movies."

She gripped the blonde's wrist as she led Quinn to a standing position.

"Rach…" Quinn sputtered out, trying to block everything out of her head again.

"Yes Quinn," Rachel shut the outside lights, and set the box down in the front hall.

"W…We're watching those movies in the fort… r-right?" Quinn looked at her scared, the fears flashing in her eyes making Rachel want to find her parents and kill them.

"Of course Quinn, we'll do whatever you want." Rachel put a reassuring hand on Quinn's back, rubbing small circles gently.

"Thanks Rach," Quinn shook from the chill slightly. "I love you,"

"I love you too."

-.-

_Quinn runs, panting hard. She's clutching the pillow case that holds her candy and presses the devil mask to her face. She's terrified of what will happen when she goes home and faces him. He won't be happy, no, not at all. He'll hit her… and probably worse. She's only 9 really; she should still be out trick-or-treating…she was surprised she wasn't locked in the dresser this year, but she had jumped out of her bedroom window right after dinner._

_Quinn turns a corner and runs away from her house in leaps and bounds. She has Cinderella bouncing around in the pillow case and she's determined to stay out as long as possible, away from him, from what he'll do. She feels so much older than just 9 years old, and she knows she shouldn't be running because she has a gymnastics competition soon. If she hurts herself, competing will just hurt more. She feels like she should be 20 by now, maybe 30. _

_Looking up at the hazy lights, Quinn looks at the corner store. The Mac's owl stands out against the blue, the only place lit up. The dry cleaner is closed, so is the dentist. Quinn pulls open the door and pants as she slips into the warm store. She won't go back home, not for anything. Not for money, not for a puppy, not even a princess could make her go back there. _

"_Happy Halloween," The tired looking cashier was slumped on the counter. "You lost little lady?" _

_Quinn shook her head, taking in the appearance of this woman. She looked like what Father would say is 'disgusting'. She scans the colorful tattoos on the woman's arms and neck, and looked at the silver rings around her lip. Father doesn't know what he's talking about because this woman is pretty. _

"_No, I'm fine, thank you." Quinn sits down against the wall beside the lotto booth, adjusting her rainbow boots before pulling a 5 dollar bill out of one of them. She slings the pillow case over her shoulder, making sure the devil mask was on tightly before she goes back into the woman's field of view. If she's a runaway now, no one can know who she is. _

_Quinn looks at the candy bars around the store, her mouth watering. Maybe when she runs away, she'll go back to Maine. She'll find her grandparents and they'll buy her more clothes for Cinderella and their house will have candy bars. Grandma will never tell her she's fat, and needs to be thin for gymnastics. Grandma won't make her take gymnastics. Grandpa will hug her and tell her he loves her, and she'll be able to make mistakes in front of him. Grandpa won't hit her with a belt, or smash a vase against her back, or cut into her with a penknife if he's angry. He'll always be pleased with her, just being her. _

_She moves onto the chips and fingers each bag lightly. She doesn't know what half of the brands taste like; she's only ever had Lays at school. Father doesn't want her having junk food. Quinn sneezes, shaking her head, sweating through her thin jean jacket. She's so cold, and she thinks she might be getting sick. But Mother stopped caring about her; so she has to go to the clinic herself after school. _

"_Find anything you like kid?" The woman speaks up, and Quinn shakes her head. _

"_No, I'm still looking." Quinn whispers. The woman seems nice enough, but if she told this lady that she was running away, the lady would tell Father and he would come get her. He always acts nice in front of people, professional everyone calls it, but he's not… he's painful and hateful and everything in between. Quinn picks up a pack of jolly ranchers, a bag of chips and bottled water. _

_Struggling under the pillowcase, Quinn puts her things on the counter, standing on her tiptoes to reach it. She's so short for her age, but she knows that had to change. Father would make her get taller; she would do it herself because that probably meant there would be more space for him. It would hurt less if he fit. _

_Quinn slides the bill towards the cash register, and puts the candy and water into her pillowcase. She opens the back of chips, grabbing for her change as the woman slides it back. _

"_Have a good night ma'am." Quinn whispers, looking at her rainboots before sliding the change against her leg and turning to leave. It's dark out and cold, but she's used to both. She just has a little more until the main roads and then she can find someone who will drive her to Maine. She'll even pay them, even though she only has about 50 cents._

_She crosses the street again, tugging off the devil mask and looks up sharply at hearing her name. _

"_Hi Quinn!" It's high and childish. Quinn looks down at the sudden force on her legs and smiles. Joshua is this tiny 3 year old who seems to love her. _

"_Hey Josh, happy Halloween." Quinn ruffles his hair, smiling shyly at his mother._

"_Happy Hawwoween! Look, I transformer!" Joshua presses the center of his outfit and the logo lights up, making noises. He smiles so brightly at this, Quinn smiles back. She looks up, and sees Mother emerge from one of the pathways between the houses. _

"_That's so cool. You make an awesome transformer." Quinn bends down to him and opens up her pillowcase, taking out Cinderella, her water and the jolly ranchers. "Josh, I got so much candy tonight, and I know you have siblings too. I don't need this anymore; can you take it for me?" _

_The child looks up with her, eyes like saucers. He looks into the bag, and back at her, nodding. "I, I take good care for you." _

_Quinn smiles, wanting to cry. He could take care of her, especially when he was a kid himself. "Thanks Josh, I have to go, I can see my mother. Enjoy the candy." Quinn hugs him as the little boy tackles her. She wants a sibling, she'd do anything for someone to talk to, to hug and love. _

"_Tank you Quinn!" Joshua holds the pillow case up to his mom and waves goodbye before going up another person's driveway with a group of kids. _

"_Quinn, you didn't have to do that." Joshua's mother speaks to her as she slides the devil mask back on, the candy in her pocket and Cinderella in her elbow. _

"_It's ok; my Father won't let me have any candy, so he can enjoy it." Quinn smiles underneath the plastic and waves bye to her, her head looking down at the shadows of the streetlights. She kicks a few pebble, the water freezing her hand. Mother had seen her, so she couldn't run away tonight. Father would know she was heading to Maine to be with her Grandma and Grandpa and he wouldn't like that. No sir, not one bit. Mother's nails dig into her arm through her jacket as she approaches the tall blonde. She bites her tongue as Mother tells her how stupid she is, how she's too fat, and tomorrow she has to be up early._

_The inside of her house is warm, and her cheeks flush from it. She feels horrible, like something is going to happen tonight, and she really doesn't want to risk that. She runs up the stairs after she kicks off her rainboots. She know Father is in his study, the door was closed, and she knows she's making noise running up the stairs, but he knows she's hear. She's just his prey now. _

_Quinn slams the door closed, and tosses Cinderella and the water bottle under her bed, she presses the devil mask against her face, tossing off her coat into the dresser. She can hear his footsteps coming up the stairs, and she frantically looks around her room; there's no place for her to hide where he wouldn't find her. She dives into her closet, shutting the door and piling her old clothes on top of her, hoping that he won't find her._

_She stops breathing as she hears a door crash open, and then slam shut. Her fingers drive into her ears so much that she thinks they're bleeding, but she doesn't care. See no evil; hear no evil, that's what she had learned in school. If she couldn't see him, or hear him, he couldn't be there…Please, he couldn't be there if she couldn't see and hear him. He'd just be a nightmare which disappears when light hits her face. _

_She sees flecks of light between the piles of clothes on top of her. The closet is open. He knows she was in here. _

"_Get up you brat!" He rages, and she coughs harshly as his leather shoe meets her shins. The pain she's feeling is unbearable, but it's nothing as bad as what's coming. Quinn bites inside her lip as he grabs her arm and pulls her out of the clothing pile. He tosses her onto the bed, the pink comforter covering half her face._

"_Please no, I'm sorry Father. Please..." Quinn screams, a bloodcurdling scream as he thrusts into her. She feels herself ripping apart for the man she calls Father. Her hands instinctively reach behind her, but he grabs them and holds them above her head as he pumps in and out, harsh and fast. Every thrust stings, but she still won't bleed. She screams into her comforter, feeling the fist slam right between her shoulder blades._

_His fingers wind into her hair and he tugs harshly. Quinn sees spots from the pull and whimpers as she feels it being pulled slowly from her head before her face thumps against the comforter again. She feels the all-too familiar warm substance inside her, and she cries. The tears are stinging, and she can't feel her hands anymore. It's done… it's done. He never does it more than once. Now she'll just get a beating. She doesn't want a beating with tomorrow's competition, but it's too late now. A few Advil tomorrow should help, if she can find a way to pick the lock on the medicine cabinet. _

_Quinn lies limp on her bed, praying that he'll leave, but she feels him grab her wrists again. She thumps down on the floor as he slams her against it, and her old jump rope is digging into her wrists. She struggles slightly, the warm liquid seeping out of her, going through her skirt, probably mixed with blood from his presence inside her. She always bleeds after she relaxes and her cheek stings as he slaps her. _

"_On your knees," He growls, and Quinn obeys. Her hands are pinned uncomfortably on her headboard, and she feels the carpet burn on her knees form already. "Open your mouth you little shit." _

_Why is he doing this? What can he possibly do to hurt her now? He can't cut off her tongue; she has yet to see a blade. Weakly, Quinn parts her lips and feels her nose begin to bleed as he slams his palm against her face. "Wider, you stupid little bitch."_

_Quinn swallows, whimpering. This is horrible; she's never done this before. He's never made her go into this position before. She opens her mouth wider, and gags. She didn't know he could do that… The sharp hair is scraping against her tongue, and she wants to vomit, but he continues. She wants to press her fingers into her ears, but her wrists bump against the jump rope as she tries. It tastes foul, like rotten eggs and vinegar and sour milk combined._

_She gags as he goes deeper, feeling like she's going to pass out. Her head is throbbing so badly, it's going to explode. Stars twinkle before her, even though her eyes are wide open from fear. She needs to throw up, she doesn't just want to. She thinks she might throw up while he's inside her, but he pulls out. Her mouth is dry and the taste lingers. _

_A warm substance covers her face and neck, and she doubts it's from the blood pouring out of her nose. She wants to be knocked out and put in a coffin. She's never felt this dirty and sick before. Faster than she can run to the bathroom, she vomits. The warmth is still on her face and her throat burns as she pukes up the chips and meager dinner, coupled with the scrapes and tearing from his enlarged member. She opens her eyes as best as she can, and sees blood mixed in with the vomit. It's not surprising, seeing that she can taste it as well. _

_Father moves away from her, and unties her wrists. Her body feels broken and burned, and without the tying force, she falls into her own bile. Quinn breaths, her nostrils burning with the rest of her insides. He tugs at her hair, getting her to roll over, like a dog. _

"_Keep this thing on," He growls, shoving the devil mask onto her face. The smiling red demon looks up at him, and beneath he sees hazel eyes flutter open. "Maybe then people can see you for what you really are." _

-.-

Rachel ran her hand through Quinn's hair, watching the blonde sleep peacefully. It was such a nice change from the tense form she had taken as they watched various movies. She didn't want to move yet, because Quinn was currently using her thigh as a pillow, and she looked adorable when she slept.

Rachel twirled the blonde hair around her finger, brushing her thumb softly over Quinn's forehead. "What happened to you Quinn?" Rachel whispered, wanting to picture the hazel eyes without any worry or sadness. She wanted Quinn to do things without being so traumatized with fear. She wanted to see happiness on the pale face and nothing more.

The lamp was casting a pale glow into the room, and underneath the sheets it was hazy. Rachel slowly ran her fingers over the scars on Quinn's arm. As she drew closer to Quinn's shoulders, the pink lines were strung together in a web-like design. Rachel slipped her fingers underneath the short sleeves of Quinn's shirt, looking at the blonde's back, which was decorated just as much in the scars.

"Thank God you survived," Rachel whispered again, leaning down to kiss Quinn. Slowly, she leaned against the couch through the sheets, and exhaled, tears streaming freely at this point. How could anyone do that to someone like Quinn; someone so caring, so loving? It didn't add up. Rachel covered her eyes as she pictured a young Quinn being hit with a belt, over and over, pleading for it to stop. She tried to keep her breathing story; the last thing she wanted to do tonight was wake up her girlfriend with her crying.

Rachel shook her head, trying to get the imaginary sounds out of her head. It was late, and she knew she was going to crash; if she stayed like this, her back would not be happy tomorrow morning. She slipped her hand under the sheets and flicked off the light, happy to finally be sitting in the darkness, away from everything, hidden in a fort. Rachel gently moved Quinn's head from her thigh to the pillow beside her, and lay down beside Quinn's sleeping form.

She wrapped her arms around the larger blonde, nuzzling her head into Quinn's neck. "I love you so much Quinn," She murmured, increasing her grip on Quinn's limp body. She had calmed down with her breathing, but she still felt shake. The image of that man driving was haunting her as much as Quinn's revelation last night. The way he was scanning the streets looked like a lion ready to kill.

"L-love you too Rach," Quinn slurred, vaguely aware of the brunette coiled around her. She was still asleep, for the most part.

"Goodnight Quinn," Rachel sighed, biting her lip and chiding herself for waking up the tired girl.

"G'night." Rachel closed her eyes at the blonde's breathy voice and tried to relax. Her muscles were tense, her mind still racing. She smiled as Quinn's arm came around and held her. This was how she wanted to stay, hidden away from everything and everyone, safe in their own little world. She felt an overwhelming desire to protect Quinn from this point on; before, she had always assumed Quinn to be guarding of her, but she was more shattered that Rachel thought.

This was her time to be the knight in shining armor

* * *

**OK, so the flashback basically described Quinn's Halloween when she's nine years old. In it, she's wearing a devil mask as a costume. She gives her candy to a little boy because Russell would never let her eat it. She also contemplates life with her grandparents. There's the abuse from Russell, and in the end, he tosses the devil mask back on her, saying that she's a little devil herself.**


	11. Not Like The Movies

**Much to say now, sorry if this author's note rambles a tad.**

**So, let's start right off the bat by addressing the previous flashback. It is disturbing, I'll give it that, but it's also real. Child abuse and sexual abuse are a very real thing. However, I apologize for the weak warning, and from now on, if I chose to include more flashbacks, I'll be doing a quick summary at the end to say if you missed anything by skipping them. I take no offense if you chose not to read them.**

**Moving on, about the flashbacks, I've decided to shake up the pattern a bit. So through the next few chapters, I'll be playing around with different styles and layouts of the story, so bear with me. I will include flashbacks, but I'm going to put some more things in as well. Flashbacks will only be used to show a certain point, or to really hammer a point home. They are intense, I understand, so I'll try to tone it down as best I can.**

**Continuing, about Mr Fabray, I have his death planned out vaguely in my head, but feel free to suggest ways that he can die. I'll take them into account for sure. I want him to suffer dearly.**

**I would now like to take the time and give a huge shout out to the amazing people who review this story. THANKS EVERYONE! It's hit 150 reviews :D so I was freaking out about that a little... Anyways, I'm extremely happy to hear that you all like it. In my English course, I'm constantly being told how my short stories have no substance, and being on this site, working hard at my stories makes me feel a lot better at the end of the day. So THANK YOU SO FREAKING MUCH!**

**Alright, now the typical disclaimer, sorry for mistakes. No flashback this time, just a little insight in someone's head. Rachel's POV when she's in the scene. There is intentions of rape and abuse, but nothing happens. This chapter is a bridge, so i tried to make it a little fluffier than usual because the next few chapters are dark.**

**So thank you all for reading, and I hope you enjoy this chapter. Have a wonderful rest of the week.**

* * *

"Tell Quinn I'm not ready!" Rachel screamed through the doors of her bedroom, the towel wrapped tightly around her with two outfits laid on her bed. Both were new, courtesy of a shopping trip with Brittany, and this was something special. It was a three month anniversary, and yes, it was clingy, but to be honest she had never had a relationship or even a friendship that had lasted so long. This was a celebration, and it was her turn to take Quinn out. Never mind that the blonde insisted on driving, she had done everything in advance.

Rachel tossed the dress into her closet, deciding it to be much too formal for an early movie and dinner. The toothbrush was sticking out of her mouth as she hastily slipped into the pants. She maneuvered it awkwardly as she pulled on the shirt as well. Quinn would have to wait a few minutes; she still hadn't finished in the bathroom. At least she didn't have to worry too much; Quinn had gotten much friendlier with her dads.

Into the bathroom she went, spitting out the toothpaste and grabbing her feeble makeup bag. There really wasn't much in it, apart from some eyeliner and eyeshadow, but she was trying to look good, so a little makeup wouldn't hurt. Rachel jumped at the knocking on the bathroom door. "Daddy, just tell Quinn I'll be done shortly."

"Rach, I'll wait. I just came up because your dads finished giving me 'the talk'" Quinn's voice was playful, laughing a little and Rachel smiled, running the curler through her hair quickly, trying to add some bounce to it.

"You can come in, I'm fully dressed." Rachel smiled as Quinn opened the door, giving her a quick peck on the cheek before jumping onto the counter. "What do you mean they gave you the talk?"

"You know… the usual things." Rachel raised an eyebrow at Quinn's blushing face. "When to have you home by, where am I taking you, what time we'll be at the restaurant; I had to give them my cell number in case anything happened."

"I thought they knew that I was the one who planned this." Rachel unplugged the curler, running her hand through her hair lightly. She cleaned up the counter quickly, glancing at her girlfriend leaning on the mirror.

"I told them otherwise." Quinn smirked as Rachel nudged her. "I'll drive; you tell me where to go. We do that all the time."

"Fine," Rachel pulled Quinn off the counter, fixing her own shirt. The scoping neckline had a simple gold necklace lying on it, the shirt was form-fitting, striped, something out of her comfort zone for sure. Quinn had given her a few concert t-shirts, but she mostly slept in them. Black jeans were also very different for her.

"You look lovely this evening." Quinn extended her arm, and Rachel slid hers through the loop.

"And you certainly know how to treat a lady," Rachel shut the lights, leaving the somewhat messy bedroom for when she got back home. Tonight, they could escape from the mounds of schoolwork, projects and seminars and just relax. Tonight, they could just enjoy each others company.

"I try," Quinn kissed her neck quickly, before standing upright again in view of her dads. Rachel rolled her eyes. She loved her dads dearly, but they could be a little overprotective. Yet, with all the problems with… people in general she had, they had a right to worry. Rachel smiled at them as she came down the stairs, letting go of Quinn's arm to hug and kiss the men.

"Rachel," Her Daddy looked at her sternly. Rachel sucked in her breath; this was going to be a long speech, which was bad. The film started at 6, and they had to redeem tickets and find seats. "We extended your curfew to midnight tonight, but that means I want to see you home exactly at midnight." He lifted his head to glare at Quinn, "Understand?"

"Yes Daddy, I'll make sure Quinn has me back by then." Rachel hugged him tightly, smiling as he kissed the top of her head. "Bye Daddy, Bye Dad." Rachel embraced the smaller Berry man, smiling as he hugged her back.

"Have a good time." Her Dad let go of her, handing her the black jacket, which Rachel comfortably eased into. She noticed the blonde looking at the clean carpet in comparison to the banged-up Batman converse on her feet.

"I will Dad, see you later." Rachel stood aside as Quinn approached the three, and shook both men's hands before sliding her gloved one into Rachel's. The brunette smiled, nuzzling her face already against the leather of Quinn's jacket, finally leaving the house and into the warm white Prius. "I never knew you were such a gentleman." Rachel teased Quinn once both were settled.

"Really? But I had been trying so hard for you to see it." Quinn feigned hurt before giggling again and turning on the radio. "Is Nightwish good for you?"

"Sure," Rachel laced her fingers into Quinn's. She had gotten used to the blonde's eclectic taste in music, and much of it was metal bands she hadn't ever heard of. "Alright, tonight you have to drive us to the Cineplex near the mall."

"Do you want anything to eat first?" Quinn went to dig something out of her pocket at the red light with her spare hand, but Rachel stopped her.

"I'm fine, and we're late as it is. We can just get some popcorn during the previews." Rachel looked at Quinn still shivering. She had been wearing the same leather jacket since school had started, just adding another sweater underneath for some warmth. The Batman converse she saw on Quinn's feet were the only shoes she ever saw lying around the blonde's apartment.

She'd get Quinn a new coat for the holidays. She knew the blonde was Christian only because of the cross she had seen hanging in the back of the dresser. So for Christmas, Quinn would get something warm.

{-}

_He sat in the chair, the radio playing some shit, but he didn't care to change it. The remote was dead, and he didn't have to leave yet. He flipped through the paper, debating about where to move to next. If that brat stirs suspicion again, he'll probably drag her to the Northwest._

_The study's windows were frosted. He learned this when he rested his head on the glass behind him. He flipped the pages, taking a sip of the brandy on the desk. He knew the wife had been at his liquor collection again, but there was nothing he could do anymore._

_The old hag loved her booze. She couldn't do anything right. Make a fucked up child, spend his money, and drink; that's all the good for nothing did. He should cut her off again; install a padlock on the basement door. However, that was where she did the laundry and things couldn't stop in this house because he didn't let her drink._

_He stood up, fixing his hair in the mirror on the desk. The paper was tossed onto the desk and he gripped the brandy glass as he stood up, looking out of the window onto the snow covered street._

_The brat hadn't gotten a visit in a few days. The last time he had gone to do one of his tri-weekly visits, he had gotten that infernal lamp broken over his back. The brat would learn, he would make her. She didn't get to do something that idiotic without any repercussions. He sipped the brandy. The massive amounts liquor he had consumed over the years made his tolerance very high._

_Perhaps tonight he would stop by after Skyfall. The owner of the brat's sty was one of his closest friends and business partner. A few more of their buddies were watching the new Bond film tonight. The problem was the brat was never at the pig-sty anymore. He saw her clothes strewn around, but never her in person._

_He nearly broke the glass from squeezing it so tightly. She didn't get to play around on his time. She belonged to him, and the only reason he had her move out was because the bitch was staging a protest. Either the brat left, or the old hag did, and at least the ancient broad had a purpose in the house._

_She better be at the apartment tonight, or the next time he did catch her, he would teach her a lesson she never forgot._

{-}

"Alright, we just have to get the tickets redeemed and then the show starts." Rachel went to the leave the car, but was stopped by Quinn's grip on her wrist.

"Rach…" Quinn went silent, and Rachel sat back down, taking the blonde's cheek in her palm. "Thanks for doing this." Rachel wiped away the tears as they fell. "Have I told you how much I love you?"

"Yes, I do believe you have," Rachel kissed Quinn softly, inhaling the sweet vanilla scent that followed the blonde everywhere. "But I still love hearing it." Quinn let go of the grasp around her wrist, allowing Rachel to move her other hand to the soft skin. She drew in the blonde, sucking on Quinn's lips softly, trying to entice her to something more. Too bad she didn't know how.

"I love you Rach," Quinn whispered, before attacking the skin on her neck. Rachel gasped, her fingers running through the blonde strands as Quinn sucked on her neck. With a free hand, Rachel ran her fingers down the front of Quinn's shirt, afraid to move further than the waistline of Quinn's jeans. The blonde made no intention of stopping her, so her hand continued.

As her fingers grasped the zipper, Quinn's hand overlapped hers, bringing it back up to her shirt. The blonde finally moved off her neck, giving her a quick kiss before whispering. "Later Rach, if you really want to."

Rachel nodded, hugging Quinn tightly before stepping out of the car into the freezing night air. She appeared quickly at Quinn's side, taking hold of the gloved hand again as they both dashed quickly into the theater. Rachel pulled the receipts from her pockets, waiting for the machine to scan them.

"Do you want anything to eat?" Quinn's arms were around her neck, the tall beauty's cheek brushing against hers.

"Yes please, just some popcorn." Rachel missed the taller girl grasping her, but shook her head. She really needed to give Quinn space. They had most classes together, and after school they were almost always at Coffee Talk or Rachel's house. Quinn rarely went home, usually sleeping in the guest room because Rachel convinced her that midnight was too late to drive back.

Rachel took the tickets the machine spit out, and went to go find Quinn. The theater was flooded with people, but she didn't know what for. It didn't really bother her, because of her stature she could easily slip between most of them. Finding Quinn, clad in black would be the problem.

"Do you want butter or not?" She had shoved herself to the front of the crowd, finding her place beside Quinn still ordering. The blonde turned to her, her arm coming around Rachel's shoulders with ease.

"No thank you, just a light popcorn and Coke." Rachel curled into Quinn's side, the tickets grasped in her hand. She took both cartons of popcorn, trying to balance everything as Quinn slid the money to the cashier, taking one from the smaller girl.

"So now will you tell me what we're seeing?" Quinn snacked on of the popcorn already, and Rachel guessed it would be half-way done after the previews.

"You'll find out when we walk into the theater. Be patient," She winked at Quinn, nudging the blonde.

"But I hate being patient," Quinn groaned, following Rachel as they tickets were punched. Rachel smiled, taking a sip of the coke and leading Quinn into the darkened theater.

{-}

_"When are you going out?" The old hag was outside the door, drunk off her ass. He rolled his eyes and huffed. She could drink in peace in a few minutes._

_"I'm leaving now." He opened the solid oak doors and looked at her, looking her age but still like she was going to a party. The martini glass was in her hand, but it was probably filled with vodka._

_"Are you going to find the little witch?" Judy seemed to compose herself just to ask that question, and he nodded._

_"It's been too long." He stepped into the patent leather shoes, putting on the grey trench coat._

_"And I assume when you're there, you'll speak to Barry about continuing the arrangements?" She sipped the vodka, and he could smell it from 10 feet away._

_"Why do you ask what you already know?" Barry, the landlord, his friend, allowed Quinn to live there as long as he got a little money slipped to him now and then. "Get me your wallet." He muttered, standing against the front door with his hands in is pockets, unaffected by the previous drink._

_She handed him the snake-skin wallet, and said nothing as he took out 2 fifties. Not having spending money for the week was worth it if the brat stayed away. He tossed it back at her before leaving the house and into the cold air._

_That stupid child didn't know how much money he had wasted on her. He had dumped so much money into making sure she was perfect, and now she wasn't sticking to the guidelines he had set for her. She would get the money, the living space, the fucking car, and she was disobeying him._

_That fucking bitch would pay._

{-}

"Did you seriously take us to see a kid's movie?" Quinn settled in her seat, her leather jacket and sweater finally off and Rachel could see how nicely she was dressed. With the black skinny jeans, she had on a tight farmer's shirt, black and white plaid. Around her neck was a simple silver chain with a guitar pick charm.

"Yes I did. You've been telling me how you wanted to see Rise of the Guardians so I figured I could surprise you," Rachel grinned as Quinn took her hand and kissed it.

"And after this I made reservations at this lovely little Italian place. It's about an hour's drive though,"

"So we're having very late dinner." Quinn started eating the popcorn, not letting go of Rachel's hand.

"Yes, I hope you don't mind." Rachel curled up in the seat like she was on the couch at home.

"Not at all," Quinn responded, feeding some of the food to Rachel as the brunette clung to her arm.

Rachel hated knowing there was school tomorrow; the same old things that happened everyday. At least tomorrow she had lunch with Quinn and Brittany She couldn't help but feel like she had been ignoring Britt recently, and with Santana's recent actions towards the three of them, she felt horrible for just hanging out with Quinn most of the time.

Santana, the name made Rachel roll her eyes. There had been one point recently, where she had seen Santana and Quinn get into a brawl in the bathroom, the blonde landing a nasty right hook on the Latina. Rachel wished Quinn would stop looking for trouble; clearly she had forgotten what had happened at the park in October. Brittany was still stuck between her new friends and her old crush. That was plain as day to anyone near them. Santana also knew how to control the blonde in every way; it was like Brittany was a puppet to her.

But enough of that.

Tonight, she couldn't help but want Quinn. She wanted Quinn to reveal more of herself tonight. She honestly wanted to see Quinn lain out on her bed wearing nothing but her bra, but she really had to control herself. It would be much easier to go back to Quinn's apartment, but the blonde would never allow that. She hadn't been there since Halloween, over a month ago; Quinn would probably never take her back.

The lights dimmed, and the beginning trailers started up. Rachel curled closer to Quinn, happy to be at the back corner where they weren't likely to stir questions. Rachel knew that it was a younger audience, and that her and her girlfriend stuck out greatly. It was nice though, as the audience settled in, knowing she had her love beside her.

"You're not going to fall asleep on my shoulder, right?" Quinn whispered, breaking her out of her head.

"Of course not, I want to see this Russian Santa Claus." Rachel snacked on her own popcorn as Quinn giggled. It was becoming much more common, to hear Quinn's laughter burble out. She didn't know if she could get the blonde to relax as much as she had, and it was a wonderful feeling.

"Really? I figured you be more interested in the British guy," Quinn pulled her knees to her chest, feeding popcorn to Rachel.

"Well, yes the British accent is attractive, but still… A Russian Santa Claus. You can't beat that."

"I think Wolverine playing the Easter Bunny is a lot cooler than the Russian Santa."

"That's just because you like Super Heroes"

"Rach?"

"Yes Quinn?"

"The movie's starting. You can fangirl over whoever you want later, but now we should really shut up."

{-}

_The leather interior was freezing. The Cadillac's radio was shut; the music these days only annoyed him. Nothing really happened that didn't annoy him anymore. He lit a cigarette, taking a drag of the nicotine._

_He had an appointment tomorrow night, a meeting to seal the deal with a new client. After that, the evening was wide open, and the brat's schedule should be as well. He hadn't had sex in close to a week, unknown to her whereabouts. He was going hunting if she wasn't there this time._

_He pulled into his friend's driveway, tossing the cigarette onto the ground, stomping out the feeble light with the leather toe. The elaborately decorated front stoop looked rather nice, but Barry's wife always had a good eye for these things. Unlike the old hag at home._

_"Evening Myrna," He nodded his head at the woman opening the door._

_"Good Evening Russell, come in. Barry's in the pool room, you can head down, a few others are here as well." Myrna moved aside as he stepped in, glancing at the family portrait on the mantel. Barry, Myrna, the three boys and the girl._

_"Any word on Jessica's whereabouts?" He grunted at the woman still around the door._

_"Nothing. We have no idea where she's gone to." The dark haired woman shut the door, disappearing back into the kitchen. He looked at the photo again, removing his coat. The girl had the same look that the Brat did when she was younger. Clearly Barry didn't do a good job hiding his affairs, if the girl appeared to be afraid; He would've easily been able to rid the porcelain face of that look._

_He entered the warm house, slipping into the shadows effortlessly, heading into the basement to the welcoming sound of liquor and poker._

{-}

"Quinn, excuse me for a second, I have to run to the bathroom," Rachel pulled away from the blonde's grasp, watching the animated picture as she headed down the stairs until she had to turn her back on it. The film was very enjoyable, more so than she had expected.

She blinked at the brightness outside the theater. A quick pit stop to the bathroom and she could be back in her girlfriend's arms. The theater was still filled to the brim with people, although they were piled into a neat line, waiting to see a feature that she couldn't read, it was so far down the hall.

Moving as quickly as she could, Rachel raced down the hall to the washrooms, trying not to bump into anyone, nimble on her feet. She pushed open the bathroom door, and mercilessly ran head first into someone.

"Rachel?" She looked up at the familiar sound.

"Hi Britt, what are you doing here?" Man, it was odd seeing Brittany without her Cheerio uniform. The blonde's hair looked nicer when it was down.

"Um… Well… San asked if I wanted to go to see a movie, and I asked her if Puck was coming too, and she promised that he wasn't. So I said sure." Brittany looked at her feet, ignoring Rachel's puzzled stare.

"But I though Santana was ignoring you at school?" Rachel refused to lean against the bathroom wall, and as much as she wanted to run back into Quinn's arms, she had to let Brittany speak now.

"She is, but she promised me she'd stop." Brittany cracked her knuckles, clearly nervous. Rachel knew there was something she was hiding; the taller girl could not lie.

"Britt, did she do anything to you? Or say anything?" Rachel stopped talking as she saw the dirty look that was being shot her way.

"San would never do anything like that to me Rach, and you know it. I know you've been on edge when you found out what happened to Quinn, but I'm fine. Trust me." Brittany sighed, her stomach growling broke the tense silence. "She promised me that she'll stop being so mean to you two. So I said yes…"

Rachel nodded, feeling a lump in her throat. She knew Brittany was trying to move forward, trying to get past the old crush. It didn't help that Puck had gone to juvie for something, and now Santana's only object of affection was the innocent blonde. Without thinking, she hugged Brittany tightly, not wanting to see the girl cry.

"You didn't have to do that Britt; especially if it makes you like this." Rachel whispered, ashamed at what the girl was doing for her. Britt shouldn't have to put aside her happiness for their safety.

"It's ok Rach, I'm fine." Brittany pulled out of her embrace, and nodded halfheartedly. "I'm fine." With that, she tossed a sad smile Rachel's way, waving goodbye as she left the room.

Words could not describe how much Rachel hated Santana Lopez at that moment. The dark haired girl was a bully, plain and simple. She was tugging at Brittany's heartstrings for all the wrong reasons, and Brittany was feeling the pain of her perfectly manicured grip. She couldn't understand why someone would ever do that to someone as innocent as Brittany, but she bit her tongue as the thoughts raced in her brain.

She didn't understand how someone could hurt Quinn the way she was scarred, but some sick human being had taken a belt to her skin. Rachel wanted to find Quinn's parents and toss them into a grizzly bear enclosure, hoping the animals would tear them apart limb from limb. She shook off chills. She was never this violent, ever, but Quinn's situation had made her so much more protective, and so angry. Her temper flared at the thought of her girlfriend's parents.

As her stomach grumbled, and she let out a small burp in the emptiness of the bathroom, she remembered why she had come in the first place. She must've missed the good part of the movie.

{-}

_He tossed the cards onto the table, face up. Royal flush. He couldn't understand why people would hold to the fact that cheating would eventually fail. He had just won about a thousand from the poker table._

_"Russell, how the hell do you keep getting these?" Barry shuffled the cards again, dealing to the table of men with wine glasses and cigarettes. The basement was clouded with the smoke from the small rolls._

_"I've had a lucky week; it must've carried to the game." He took a sip of the red wine from his glass, and a drag of the cigarette to clear his mind. The week had been stressful and hectic and overall horrible, but his luck was going to turn, he could feel it._

_"Keep that luck for when we get to the parking lot." Another fellow spoke up, holding the glass of wine as a baby did to its bottle. Amos took a hearty swig from the fine china before pounding it on the table. "Gents, I say we agree; Russell, the dirty bastard, swindled our money again. Now let's put aside our losses and go see Skyfall."_

_He couldn't understand how he called a man as happy as Amos was a 'friend.' The simpleton loved his liquor, and he was known only to be unhappy if someone tried to take it away from him. He noticed how Barry and himself were the only men with children at the table._

_"Alright," The 5 surrounding the table stood, putting on jackets. He eyed Barry from across the table, a knowing look. The two would stay to discuss. "You fellows head to the theater, I just have to discuss a few new business ventures with Russell and we'll follow."_

_The other three nodded, leaving the basement. Both men downstairs could hear them giving goodbye's to Myrna, and exiting the house._

_"So what room did you have to give up for the little brat to live here?" He took a sip of the wine, feeling a slight buzz settle nicely over him._

_"She took Jessica's room actually. The girl had sealed off a room for herself when we moved in, and then left. Not an inconvenience at all here." Barry ran his hand over his slicked black hair. "Why do you ask?"_

_"I haven't seen her in a few days." He gripped the edge of the chair angrily._

_"A few weeks I'll say. That girl comes here only to sleep, and occasionally eat. I haven't heard any noise from here in the past few days." Barry leaned against the wall; he glared at his friend._

_"Where does she go exactly?" He took his coat, sliding it on while questioning the stocky man under his stare._

_"I couldn't tell you. She leaves no evidence. I haven't seen her with anyone. She just gets in the car and leaves, coming back when she feels like it. I think that girl found someone to stay with. Be careful Russell," Barry stood up to his full height, a few inches over him. "If she feels comfortable enough to live with whoever she's with, I doubt she'll have a problem telling them what you've done to her."_

_"What are you getting at?" He glared at the man opposite him._

_"I mean, she'll tell her friend or date everything, and anything. You could be in so much fucking trouble if you don't rein her in. I suggest you show her some punishment unless you want to be in trouble with the law. We're talking CPS, Court fees, lawyers, everything. Watch yourself Russell, that girl will squeal if you let her."_

{-}

"So you liked the Russian Santa Claus, did you?" Quinn smiled as Rachel zipped up her leather jacket for her.

"I told you I would. He's the most badass Santa I've ever seen." Rachel giggled as the watched the closing credits. They were the only two left in the theater, the popcorn and soda long gone. Hunger was gnawing at Rachel's stomach as she thought of the pasta the Italian place had, upset that it was so far out.

"I'll say. I still liked Sandy the best. He was cute, and cuddly, but you do not want to fuck with him." Quinn swung her legs onto the seats in front of them, pulled her hood over her eyes. She listened as Rachel went on about how much she liked it before the brunette realized how she was sitting.

"Quinn, don't fall asleep on me." Rachel nudged the blonde, jumping as Quinn lunged at her. "And don't do that! You scared me!"

"Loosen up a little Rach," Quinn effortlessly put the brunette in a headlock, ignoring Rachel's protests. "I heard everything you said, trust me. And no, I'm not tired. I have the entire science and math period to sleep tomorrow; I can stay up all night."

"Doing what exactly?" Rachel nearly fell to the floor as Quinn's arm released her neck and she bit her lip, knowing she had done something wrong. "Quinn?"

"Get your mind out of the gutter Rach; I'm not like the oaf you dated. Didn't you say he almost raped you because he wanted sex?" Quinn took Rachel's blushing state as a yes. "Rach, you stood up to him, don't be ashamed to be strong ok? I just don't want to force you to do anything yet. I want to take this slow, and I just want to enjoy dating a while before we actually have sex."

"I know, but I think I would thoroughly enjoy it if you pleasured me, just a little." Rachel grinned as Quinn's lips crashed into her. She was finally the same height as the blonde as she stood on the steps going up to the seats. Her hands flew to Quinn's cheeks, pulling in the blonde every time she tried pulling away for air. Quinn's hands settled neatly on her waist, unwilling to move either way, but she didn't care.

She opened her mouth, allowing their tongues to mingle and moaned as Quinn knew exactly what to do. She could barely breathe from trying to get all of the blonde inside her mouth, feeling Quinn's tongue hit her tonsils. She was glad she didn't have much of a gag reflex, because she didn't know how far Quinn could go. The blonde's hands pulled her body closer, and Rachel was beginning to hate the jackets that separated them even more. She wanted to drive home and jump into her bed, having Quinn fuck her until she couldn't move.

Slowly, Quinn backed away, withdrawing her tongue from Rachel's throat, smiling as the shorter girl panted. "See, you can't even catch your breath when I kiss you. I might kill you from what we do in bed because you won't be ale to breath."

"Then I'll die happy." Rachel grinned at the lingering taste of vanilla on her lips, pulling Quinn closer to her. She wrapped her arm around the blonde's waist, feeling the same protective arm cover her shoulders. Maybe she could work with these little tastes of Quinn, but not for long.

People clearly didn't want to go home on a weeknight. Now there were teenagers crowding for what appeared to be the new Twilight film. Rachel clung to Quinn tighter as she they made their way through the crowd. In the distance, near the ticket counter, she could make out a face she had seen once before. It was filled with hate and loathing, and she locked eyes with the man before turning her gaze away hastily, gripping onto Quinn as though her life depended on it.

"Now, my lady, shall I take you to dinner?" Quinn's breath hung and fell in the cold night air, and Rachel nodded.

"You've heard of Allegra's right?" She couldn't believe she had thought the blonde would want Italian. She should've asked Quinn what she preferred for dinner instead of assuming. Although, all she had ever seen the blonde eat was pizza, the occasional steak, fruits and vegetables. And bacon… lots of bacon.

"I have, from you. I've heard it's good." Quinn clicked open the car door, sliding across the hood to open Rachel's door. Yes, her date was certainly the perfect gentleman, she smiled softly.

"Do you trust me?" Rachel grabbed Quinn's hand, still feeling a slight chill of recognition from the man in the theater.

"Of course I do," Quinn inhaled, debated on her words. "I'd trust you with my life."


	12. Valley Of The Dolls

**Hello all, and Happy holidays to everyone here. **

**Yes, I have another long A/N, which of course, feel free to skip. So, first of all, thank you to all who are keeping with this fic. I know it's dark, and depressing and disturbing at points, and I thank everyone who reviews and reads this. Thanks for the reviews :) they make my day. And as a shout out to the ones who say they don't comment often, but have commented on this story, THANK YOU! **

**I know it's also a bit late of an update. cough *a month* cough. My sense of time is clearly non-existent, but i'm going to keep pushing ahead with this story, so there will be updates! I just don't know when. **

**Moving on, this chapter doesn't have a large flashback, per say. It springs back and forth from the night after the movie date to the morning after. I'm giving it an m warning! Warning! Because Quinn is under 18, child abuse, sexual abuse, rape, verbal abuse, physical abuse(beatings). I try to make the sexual abuse not so graphic, but I don't know other people's definitions of graphic. This chapter intertwines the abuse sections with the present day, so if you don't want to read it all, I'll put a summary at the end. I'm also working on chapter summaries at the end of the other chapters, just in case. **

**Disclaimer, all mistakes mine.  
**

**And that's about it really, so until I can post more, have a great week. Readers, thank you for the support in the following and favouriting, and I will try and post a new chapter by the middle of January. Happy New Year everyone! **

* * *

Quinn rolled out of bed, or more precisely, off the couch in a daze. Her head was spinning as to how she had made it from Rachel's house to here. All she wanted to remember was that she had been on an amazing date with her girlfriend, and given her a bracelet at the restaurant before heading here. Why didn't she just spend the night like her instinct was telling her?

She got on her knees and flipped the couch cushion over again, hiding the mass of stains and what looked like fresh ones. Maybe she was drugged last night and couldn't remember a damn thing because of it. She stood to walk into the bathroom, but her breath hitched as she moved. Nope, she could remember every burning scene with each step.

"Fuck," Quinn grabbed her cell from its hiding spot, flipping open to the history. Him, him, him, him, all threats, so many fucking threats. Then she saw it, that one name that was going to make her eat her heart out. Rachel.

"What the fuck did I say" She rubbed her temples, feeling around the crust of something at her mouth. She didn't really want to remember what it was, and she scratched until it came off. "Please, please, fucking please tell me I didn't do something I'll regret." She slammed her hand on the coffee table, gasping in pain as a closed cut split open again. She looked at her hand, and then at the empty wine bottle on the table, realizing where the headache was coming from.

Examining her hand, she determined the cut to be from his knife. It looked too clean to be from anywhere else. She pressed it against her freshly washed pajama shirt, muttering how she had laundry to do now. The couch was stained on both sides, through the blue fabric the red and white stains glared at her. She settled on the blood stains, deeming them less degrading than the others, and slammed her bloodied fist against the doorframe as she went into the bathroom.

The white tile was covered in water, and pink blood and who knows what else. She tried to step around it, but settled with wet feet in front of the bathroom sink, holding her throbbing hand underneath the faucet.

"Rachel?" Quinn balanced the phone on her shoulder, looking at the fresh black eye as she tried to remember what had happened last night.

"_What do you want now?_" Rach had been crying; Quinn had been unfortunate enough to hear that sound too many times in their relationship. She had always been the one to go after whoever had upset her girlfriend, and she felt sick.

"Rach, what the hell did I say last night?" Quinn ran the now wet and no less bloody hand through her hair, looking like a complete mess.

"_Check your messages,_" Before Quinn could comment, Rachel ended the call, and she flung her phone against the wall. The damn thing stayed intact, and crying, she picked it up.

*No Open Conversations* stared blankly back at her.

-.-.-

_She sits curled on the couch, the TV staring back at her. Something's playing, but she really doesn't care. She knows Rachel told her not to come back, and she already heard the car leave the driveway, at 2 freaking am. He's coming; she can feel it in her bones. It's like a premonition, she can just feel it. _

_She actually wants her Cinderella doll, how sad is that? She's 16, and she's been on her own since she was born. For the first time since she can remember, she's in a decent relationship without any underlying intentions. Yet she still wants to hold that damn doll and stroke it's hair and say how everything will be ok. _

"_It's ok, everything will be ok," Quinn whispers to herself, pulling the blanket further around her frozen shoulders. She sounds so stupid saying it to absolutely nobody. Her hands fumble with her cell as she calls Rachel quickly, hoping that the brunette is still awake. _

"_Quinn?" The sleepy voice comes through the fuzzy speaker and Quinn breaths a sigh of relief. _

"_Hey Rach," She smiles, lightly fingering the necklace Rachel had given her at dinner. _

"_Are you ok?" Rachel's becoming more awake with every motion. _

"_Yeah, I'm fine. For now." Quinn hears the car pull into the driveway, knowing that it was the red Mercedes. There wasn't any hesitation about that. _

"_Quinn, what do you mean?" Damn, she sounds too alert now. The pounding starts at the door. "Quinn, what is that?"_

"_Just the pipes settling," Quinn hesitates before doing what she really, really regrets. The phone smashes against the wall, and the pieces fly. The back cover and battery disappear as she grips the lamp nearest to her. She never goes down without a fight, not now. _

-.-.-

Rachel sat on her bed, biting her lip at how Quinn had the gall to call her after last night. Last night, she had begged Quinn to stay at her house. They had gotten home 10 minutes after midnight, and probably spent another 20 kissing in the car before her dad came out to get her. She balled her hand, wanted to throw a punch, but she couldn't find the will.

The messages didn't even sound like Quinn. It sounded like a template coming from Quinn's phone, but not from the blonde herself. She wiped her eyes, looking blankly at her phone. She felt horrible, still in her pajamas. She couldn't drag herself to first period this morning. She would have to make second, but she couldn't drag herself to English today.

Her fingers brushed the keyboard, before she put the phone on mute, slammed it on her nightstand and crawled back under the covers.

-.-.-

"_Quinn! Quinn answer me!" Rachel's heart races at the dial tone. "Quinn!" She wants to scream, but she can't wake her dads. It's so late on a school night, and yes, she is a good student, but she does have that childish fear of waking up her parents in the middle of the night. _

_She tosses the covers off her bed, her head still spinning from the blood rush. She tries calling Quinn, over and over she does. Enough, she's had enough of not knowing. The alarm is already on downstairs, so she tugs on a few sweaters before opening the side of her window. She's going to be crazy if she tries to walk to Quinn's at this time of night, and at this point of winter. The harsh wind bites at her, but she ignores it, pulling up her hoodie. Her slippers dig onto the spackled tar of the shingles, and she looks over the edge onto the grass. _

_Anything that she was afraid of disappears as she thinks of what could've happened to her girlfriend. She doubts all of the lies Quinn feeds her, but she doesn't know how else to approach the blonde without the fear of abandonment. _

_She jumps, free falling for a second before hitting the grass. Instinctively, she rolls, and stands up, shaken but solid. The garage handle is cold under her fingers, but she opens it, gritting her teeth. She forgot her damn keys, and Quinn might be able to jump start a car, but she really had no idea. She tugged at her bike, freeing it from the piles of goodness knows what, and mounts it. _

_She closes her garage, sucking in her breath at the bite of the wind. The streets are too quiet for this time of night. _

_Her phone buzzes. _

-.-.-

Quinn looked at herself, bloody and bruised, and pressed the phone to her ear again, hearing the same voice mail as the last 7 times.

_Hi, this is Rachel and I can't answer right now… Quinn stop it…please leave a message at the tone… Quinn, really? _

The shrill sound buzzed in her skull, and she sighed

"Rach, it's me. I know I've called a hell of a lot, but I want to talk to you. My messages are deleted. I can't remember anything that happened when I got home last night other than going through the door. Please call me back, I want to fix this. I want to fix this so much…" Quinn whispered the last sentence before sucking in her breath again, "I love you Rach, nothing will change that, and I don't know what I did wrong."

Quinn tossed the phone onto the toilet lid, tying her hair into a ponytail and hearing a faint ringing in her ears. He had come; she had broken her phone, but he had pieced it back together. He had taken her phone and done something to it. He had berated her constantly, screamed at her for being so stupid as to thing that someone would love her. He had grabbed her by the wrists, and tugging so hard she felt her arms would fall off.

She shut her eyes tightly, welcoming the stars that followed. She realized the overwhelming pain she felt sitting down, and the swimming feeling that was running inside her head as she tried to move. He had done everything to her last night; every horrible fucking thing had been done, and she couldn't do a damn thing about it. She really had to curb her swearing; Rachel didn't like it too much.

Standing up, now painfully aware that every crevice of her body ached, she washed her face, brushed her teeth, the whole she-bang. Her filthy gnarled hair was still in the ponytail, but she covered that with a black toque, grabbing her car keys and ditching the Batman bag. She remembered her shoes just as she locked the door, but didn't care. She had to get to Rachel's, she had to apologize, she had to make up a decent cover-up for what had happened last night, and the countless nights before.

-.-.-.-

"_Fuck you!" Quinn screams her voice hoarse as she feels him push further into her. His hand is against the back of her skull, and she spits blood as her face meets the tile. She screams loudly as the lamp is brought against her skull, the echoing voice of his growl mixing in with everything else. _

"_You stupid bitch! You cunt! You whore! You really think someone will ever love you?" Russell dangles the phone in front of Quinn, but she can't read a damn word. The glowing light swims hazily in front of her bloodshot eyes, and feebly she reaches out a hand. _

_She never screams like this. She never shows pain. Piercing cries break through the silent air as his knife shoots into her hand. She's never like this. Getting so much love in one night has made her weaker than she thought. _

"_You tricked this poor girl into thinking that you were worth loving," She doesn't answer his taunts. She bites hard on her lip as he pumps in and out of her. "Maybe I'll go find her tonight, and do this to her too," No, he can't do that, not to Rachel, never…_

"_N-no," She stutters, her voice low and trembling. She tries getting onto her elbows, but the lamp pounces on her head. His elbows dig into her shoulders, one hand grasping a clump of her hair and tugging hard. _

"_You don't tell me what to do bitch." He drops the phone right in front of Quinn, but she can't see what it says. Her eyesight is shot for the night. "You clearly want to wreck her so much; I'll save you the trouble. You'd like that? Someone as filthy as you?" Tears burn hot on her face, the blood from her hand pooling on the floor in front of her. _

"_Y-you wouldn't" She whispers, whimpering in pain as he pushes, full force, and she feels the familiar warm substance fill her. With a small gasp, she lets her entire body go limp._

"_Oh really?" The knife slices her side, cutting clean through her tank top and the blood loss is really fucking with her. His voice hisses words that make her blood run cold._

"_What makes you so sure?" _

-.-.-.-

"I love you too," Rachel whispered in response to the message, smiling softly before breaking out in a new round of tears. "Please Quinn, I love you so much." She threw her head back on her pillow, hugging it tightly, burying her face in it. She could still smell the faint linger of vanilla where Quinn had napped on it a few days prior, and the fear of it disappearing made her cry harder.

She rubbed her eyes, red from crying, but sitting up fully. Her room was messy, her desk was cluttered with drawings Quinn had made and books that the blonde had made her borrow even though the chance of reading was slim. She looked down at the Nirvana shirt, the same one on Quinn the day they met, and she did everything she could to keep her composure.

Quinn couldn't mean what she had said… it wasn't possible… at least, not in her mind. Quinn was hers, and she had proven that she was tough, and kind. Rachel fell back onto her pillow, pulling the covers over her head. Her Dad would be upstairs any minute to tell her to get ready for school, but she didn't want to, not now. Nothing would stop how this hole inside her was eating away at her, and going to school would only make it worse,

A part of that wasn't true. She could go to school and hang out with Brittany, try and convince the blonde that Santana didn't utterly hate her. The idea of consoling someone else today was exhausting, and she grabbed Quinn's pillow, crying freely onto it.

-.-.-.-

_Rachel pulls the bike over at the end of her street, taking her phone out of her pocket. Quinn really had to say how she was ok now, because her conscience is eating at her. She shouldn't have let Quinn go home, not at this time. They've had sleepovers before, so why should this night be any different? _

_**Rach, I think we should see other people.**__ Rachel blink in shock, before hammering out a response. Quinn's joking. She has to be…Or someone is typing for her. She did catch the slam before the line went dead._

_**You're funny Quinn.**__ She sends the message, and kicks off again, heading in the direction of Quinn's house. She's not going to ignore what is a clear cry for help. She isn't thinking clearly, she should've brought backup, but she's running on adrenaline now, so she's convinced she can face whatever horror Quinn has been facing since forever began._

_**You think I'm joking. Silly girl. **__Rachel maneuvers her phone out of the hoodie's pocket as she speeds down the cold empty streets. _

_**What do you mean? **__This isn't Quinn, this can't be Quinn, it can't be. Quinn would never do this to her. Quinn had promised that they wouldn't break up; that she'd always be there for Rachel. So what exactly was going on? Rachel's sleep-addled brain goes into overdrive. Someone is at Quinn's house, and is typing this. It's the only logical thing._

_**Are you as stupid as you are ugly? I'm ending this! I can do better than you, so much better. Have you looked at yourself recently? You're just a fat midget. I try to be polite about it, but you clearly have no concept of the thing. **__Rachel nearly falls off her bike as she reads the message. She feels the tears stream down her face. Quinn isn't like the others, she would never say such harsh things. Never…Rachel lets out a small sob, the noise echoing down the empty road. _

_**Please don't say that Quinn, **__She bites her lip, pressing on in the cold night. Some one's there, and she has to save her girlfriend_

-.-.-.-.-

Quinn drove down the suburbs, hating everything about the happy houses, with clean cut lawns and smiling little kids playing on toy bikes. If she let her anger linger too long, she'd just get sad, and she didn't feel like sobbing in her car. She cranked the volume louder, and slipped on her shades against the bright white of the Lima snow.

Rachel, had she been threatened last night? Quinn couldn't see any of the texts, and she was half-dead when Russell called and scared the shit out of the brunette. Quinn slammed her fist on the steering wheel, screaming loudly inside the confines of her car. He had fucking called her and created such a fucking disaster. She had to come clean now, how else could she possibly explain it to Rachel?

No… No… Quinn Fabray was not a fucking quitter, and she wasn't about to spear Rachel's heart now. Not at all. They would head off to New York together, and he would never find them there. If he did, she'd be ready with a revolver to take his head clean off. She tried to conceive a lie to tell Rachel as she rolled into her girlfriend's driveway, surprised to see the silver bike lying abandoned in the snow at the side of the house.

Her heart nearly stopped as she looked at the dual set of footprints, one clearly Rachel's, and the other… bigger. They were made by a set of construction boots, or something of the kind, large but not fumbling. She couldn't see past the bike, and she couldn't get a chance to look further because she say Rachel's dad pulling out of the garage beside her.

"Quinn, you're here a little late." Hiram Berry looked at her, and she blushed heavily. She felt inadequate already, and his stare didn't help.

"I'm sorry sir; it was a late night last night." She got out of the car, offering her hand to shake through his open window.

"Just get to school in time for second today." He nodded solemnly at her. "Have a good day Quinn."

She blinked at his small show of warmth to her, and nodded, retracting her hand. "You too sir." She watched as the car pulled away in the opposite direction of the bike, and she exhaled, rushing to the side of the house, praying her predictions hadn't come true.

-.-.-.-.-

_Her head spins as he flips her over. His hand pulls at her hair, and she grits her teeth. She knows exactly what's coming for her. _

"_Do you know what you said to Rachel?" He hisses, his face blurred through the blood in her eyes. She can feel the red liquid coming down from a cut at her hairline, and she just blinks at him. "tsk, tsk, you're a horrible person Quinn, telling the girl how fat and stupid she is," _

_Quinn doesn't say anything. She can feel the warmth pool on the tile beneath her. Rachel isn't any of those things. She's small, and smart and beautiful, and perfect. Quinn opens the corners of her mouth, allowing the blood to leave her mouth. _

_He hammers something out on her phone, but she can't see what. He tosses the phone beside her on the couch, and pries open her mouth, inserting his hardened member into her. She gags, feeling the sting of his palm on her cheek as she does so. It tastes foul and dirty, and everything in between. He grunts as he thrusts again, quickly responding to Rachel._

"_And look… You seem to think… She's the worst thing… that's ever happened… to you…" He says between thrusts, and Quinn feels the tears mix in with the blood. Clearly without thinking, she bites. Her sharp canines dig into him, and he screams, long and loud before removing himself from her. She'd smile if pain wasn't wracking every inch of her body. _

"_F-fuck … y-you…" She whispers, before shutting her eyes to welcome black. He doesn't let her go yet. He howls at her about being a lowlife, a slut, a whore, a fickle bitch. _

"_How about we call her?" He hisses, his serpentine voice worming into Quinn's head and making her open her eyes at the bright light of the phone screen. _

"_N-no," She gets out, lying on the cold tile. She feels his foot connect with the cut on her side, and she doubles over in pain. Fetal position comes so easily to her. The man grabs her wrists tightly, yanking her arm so hard she thinks it will pop out of the socket. He tosses her on the couch, and she feels the knife cut into her hand again. _

"_Try me," He murmurs, slicing her fingertips as she lies blankly. "TRY ME YOU LITTLE BITCH! GO AHEAD! YOU THINK YOU CAN GET AWAY WITH ANYHTING, DON'T YOU!" He slaps her, knife still in hand "ANSWER ME!" _

-.-.-.-

Rachel heard the voices mingle at her front door, but she ignores both. Quinn must be here, because the voices move to the kitchen quickly. Her Dad is always friendly with Quinn, but she knows Daddy has his doubts. She thought she could prove him wrong with this.

She wanted Quinn to come upstairs and tell her what happened last night had been nothing more than a hallucination, or a dream. She knew it wasn't a dream because she still had the cut from the fall and the aches and pains from everything else. She could practically feel the sting of the icy wind on her skin, and she buried her face into her pillow, trying to wish it away.

She heard the footsteps slowly come up the stairs, and she waited for the inevitable. How could she have been so stupid last night? She shouldn't have left her room; she should've called her dads. She should've faced the music and dragged them out of bed and straight to Quinn's. She was so stupid for jumping off her roof and trying to bike to Quinn's, and even stupider for thinking she could bike back just as fast.

Her head throbbed as she thought about it. How she scrambled to climb up her rain pipe, the metal scraping her thighs and the slippers digging into the brick, and how she fell back into the snow. How her fingers were chilled to the bone, how everything about her was frozen near solid, and how she had kept fighting.

She got out of bed at the knocking, noticing how she had titled her chair against the doorknob so it couldn't open. She was freezing without her covers, going back to grab them before opening the door. The familiar hazel eyes met hers, and she felt the tears stream hot on her face. She stepped aside, allowing the blonde to enter, closing the door before Quinn could say a word.

"Rachel, I'm so, so sorry."

-.-.-.-.-

_Rachel slows her pace enough to properly read the messages through the tears. She stops her bike entirely. She's not far from home and it wouldn't be hard to turn around and go back. She could easily scurry up the rain pipe and into her room so she could cry in peace. Quinn wouldn't to this to her, but the messages coming through were powerful. _

_She dismounts the bike, and sits on the curb, her behind frozen from the contact, and the hot tears instantly freezing on her face. She's so stupid to think that Quinn would actually love her. This was all one big hoax, an elaborate prank. She covers her eyes with her frozen hand, sobbing quietly, but echoing across the black tar._

_She jumps as her phone begins ringing. The ringtone is something Quinn set herself, some Black Sabbath song; Rachel wasn't sure which to be honest._

"_Hello?" She sniffled. _

"_**Oh, you're crying**__." A harsh male voice comes through the line, so icy it makes her skin crawl. "__**Listen to that Quinn, she's crying.**__" Quinn's there, she's there, and this man must be the one who's trying to separate them. He must be. _

"_Who is this?" Rachel's heart leaps into her throat as he laughs. It's a deep belly laugh, somber and loud. _

"_**Who do you think it is**__?" Her skin was itching just at the sound of the voice. Her goosebumps raise higher than before. _

"_I… I don't know, have we met?" Rachel yawns, her body tired, her mind racing alongside her heart. _

"_**I don't know, you tell me**__," Rachel grips her bike handle, jumping onto it and racing back to her house. This isn't happening; she's seen this in cop shows. This is bad, so very bad. _

"_What do you want from me?" She struggles to keep her eyes open, now racing with the wind. _

"_**Well, Quinn here says I should come and get you myself. Have a little fun with you Rachel, and I know exactly where to find you too, thank Quinn for that**__." Rachel didn't say anything as she sped up, using her adrenaline to go. "__**You're outside, aren't you? I'm sure I can catch up with you.**__" Rachel hears a squelch through the phone, "__**Thank your girlfriend for that too**__."_

_Rachel slams her phone shut, petrified by the thought of the caller. The man must be related to Quinn, that's the only thing she can think of. He must know Quinn well enough to know about Rachel too. Fuck… this was bad, this was horror film bad. _

_She slows down, breathing heavily but begins to speed up again. She can't be that dumb blonde who practically waits for the killer to find her. She rounds the corner of her street, hearing a horrific sound. _

_A running motor. _

_She skids into her driveway, tossing the bike beside her house, her slippers making uneven footsteps in the snow. The engine cuts, and mixed in with the occasional car on the road; a person wouldn't tell that it was out of place. She grips the rainpipe, falling once onto her back, hearing a sickening laugh as the snow sticks to her clothing. The footsteps crunch the salt on at the end of the driveway. She's so tired; she wants to fall asleep here, pretending it to be Quinn's arms._

_But she's not ready to die. _

_So she stands up. _

* * *

**Summary: Quinn went home after their late date, and Russell showed up. He had his way with her, threatening Rachel with Quinn's phone as well. He threatens to rape her, taking it as far as going to her house and seeing her. Through Rachel's POV, Quinn calls her late at night, and she goes to see what's wrong. When she runs back, Russell sees her. The insinuation is that he raped her as well, but it's an open ending. Cliffhanger! _  
_**


	13. Cemetery Weather

**Hello Everyone :) I hope everyone had a great holiday and all that jazz before going back to the grind. Happy New Year! Moving past, It's prior to mid-January and this is up so yay! I made the goal, which I am very pleased to say. So, I have good news for this chapter. The flashback is included, but it is nowhere near as graphic as any of the others. This flashback is also the furthest back into Quinn's history that I think I'm going to go. A part of me wants to write one for Rachel, just describe how she was a lonely child, but I don't know. If any of you want to see that, I'll pen one. **

**Thank you for all the reviews :) follows, and favourites. And just a thank you to those who took the time to read this, because this story clearly peaked your curiosity enough to click on it. At that's all I really have to say today. The ending of this chapter might be a bit fluffy, but the next one is grim. All mistakes are mine...**

**and just to add something for an older chapter, I didn't know what croissants were made of. My mistake. Warning! Child abuse, physical abuse. **

**So, until next time, have a wonderful weekend!**

* * *

"He didn't hurt you , did he?" Quinn hugged her girlfriend tightly, wishing she could pull the memories of whatever happened out of Rachel and inflict them onto herself. She didn't want to think of the outcomes of last night, and as she held tightly to Rachel, her own muscles were finally giving out.. Her knees buckled, and she felt Rachel begin to support the two of them.

"No Quinn, I'm fine. I hopped the fence to my backyard when I saw him coming. He didn't hurt me." Rachel felt increasing pressure as Quinn's weight leaned on her. She didn't want to believe that Quinn had ordered the attack against her, and frankly, she wasn't about to. "That was your father, correct?" Quinn nodded into her shoulder and Rachel closed her eyes, supporting the two of them, smelling the sweet vanilla perfume that constantly hung around Quinn. "Why? Why was he here Quinn? I want answers… I want you to tell me the truth."

"Rach…" Quinn tried to get the words out, but Rachel stopped her dead.

"No! Enough with your lies. I'm not stupid and you lying to me constantly makes it seem like I am. Tell me the truth Quinn. That was the man that beat you, correct?" Rachel untangled herself from the blonde and crossed the room to sit on her bed, waiting for Quinn to join her. She sighed when Quinn shut the door, leaning against it. She never made eye contact.

"Yes…" Quinn blinked back tears forming, rubbing away the ones that managed to fall. She felt her cheeks burn as Rachel continued to look at her.

"Why are you still keeping contact with him Quinn?" Rachel stayed on the bed, keeping the distance between them. "If this man… if this monster was hurting you, why would you still let him find you?"

Quinn wanted to scream at Rachel's ignorance. It wasn't as easy as the brunette seemed to think, not in the slightest. It wasn't as though Quinn had severed ties from her "family". He still held a power over her that scared the living daylights out of her; that made her cower in fear no matter how strong she thought she could be. She could still be shoved so easily back into that dresser again; fetal position came so naturally to her. She never had the guts to just leave her parents' house; he had broken her apart so much when she was younger that she couldn't imagine herself leaving.

He had made her realize that she needed him for food, for shelter. This house, the place she slept at, it was as though he was gifting her with mercy. He still had full power over her; he was strong, powerful and rich, everything she wasn't. If she ran, he would find her. He would undoubtedly find her. She could try so hard, but she couldn't sever contact with him even if she desperately wanted to. He would explode into an angry ball of fire and hatred. Last night had been one of the worst nights of her life, and it had involved Rachel; the two halves of her that she never wanted to mix.

If she wanted to keep the natural order of things, she would have to fight him and lose every time. His temper was not something to be toyed with. She had to keep the order if she wanted Rachel to stay safe. Last night, the message rung loud and clear; it was a warning. This was what happened when she played with the order of things, and this would happen again.

"Rach, he hates me. There has never been a time in my life where he wanted me to be happy. I doubt anything has changed." Quinn made up the story as she went along. "He must've seen us together, somehow. He doesn't like things in his life that he can't control, and I'm one of those things."

Rachel stood, biting her nail lost in thought. Quinn didn't say anything as the brunette approached her, looking her for any trace of a tell before speaking. "So you're saying he was trying to hurt you through me."

"Exactly." Quinn winced at the sharp slap on her cheek from Rachel. She saw the fire in the tiny girl's eyes, opening her mouth to speak before closing it again.

"And you can just sit there and let that happen?" Rachel was shaking with anger, something Quinn really hadn't seen from the generally subdued girl. "You can just wait for me to get hurt? So you can do what exactly? Come running and lick my wounds? Are you insane?"

"I wouldn't be with you if I couldn't protect you Rach, I swear." Quinn tried to get closer to her girlfriend, feeling the sharp stings on her already throbbing arms as Rachel swatted her away.

"Where were you last night when he almost had his way with me? Were you just going to show up with your white car like it's your shining steed and save me when he's with me? Do you actually expect me to buy any of this bullshit?!" Rachel violently threw a pillow in Quinn's direction, her face burning hot from anger and tears. "You can protect me from the small things at school, but I'd say I'm doing a hell of a lot for you too!"

Rachel took a small break from yelling madly to watch Quinn stumble for an explanation. "When we were at that park on Halloween, I helped you limp home. I didn't tell anyone about what happened because I respected your privacy! Last night I tried to get to your house because this man seemed to be hurting you! I'm trying Quinn, I'm being honest! Why aren't you?"

Rachel stopped her yelling as she watched Quinn fall to the floor and press up against her wall, hands pressed hard against her ears. She stood in a stunned silence, panting as she watched Quinn begin to sob, her body shaking from it. Quinn face was bright red, and underneath the color she could see the beginnings of a black eye. She could hear Quinn muttering to herself between the baited breaths. "Oh god…"

She knelt down, trying to take hold of Quinn and calm her down, trying to touch the blonde. Her hand rested on Quinn's arm for a second before Quinn pulled away, falling harder onto the floor and curling into fetal. "Quinn, I'm sorry."

Somewhere inside the high collared leather jacket, Quinn could hear Rachel's apologies echo in her head. Her eyes were closed so tight that she could count the constellations. Her hands were balled over her ears, trying to shove out the yelling; how she wasn't good enough, she hadn't done enough. She was horrible, plain and simple. Even Rachel thought that now.

Her knees banged into her chest, feeling her breath leave her as she tried to curl into a tighter ball, trying to stay away from Rachel's touch. It hadn't taken much to get a slap from the brunette; god knows what else was coming now that Rachel was angry with her. She felt a hand lie on her side as Rachel's body closed around her, and immediately all she see was him. The way his hand had gripped her side and tossed her away so easily.

She pushed Rachel away, her hand slamming into Rachel's chest to pull away from the brunette. Lying in the middle of the floor, she realized what she had done, and she could practically see Rachel's thoughts now. She was going to get hit, or cut or bruised. Rachel didn't love her the way she thought, he was right; no one would ever love her. She wanted to run away, get the hell out of here as fast as possible, but with her aching body, sore ribs and now loss of breath, she had a better chance of dying right there.

When had she gotten this weak? At what point had she just broken down and given it her all. Probably when she had first kissed Rachel, yeah that's a good point to start. Now, it was doomed. What chance did someone like herself have with someone like Rachel? She didn't want to move, she just wanted someone to cover her with a sheet and forget about her. It would be perfect that way. She could freeze herself being hidden from the world, and when someone found her, someone as sick and twisted as her, she could take the sheet off and be with them.

"Quinn, I'm sorry." The words bounced in her head as Rachel's breath warmed the skin on her neck. She blinked her eyes open, the purple and blue lights dazing her before the words came again. "Quinn, please, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean for this to happen." Apologies, man did they sound weird being directed at her. She never got one of these before.

Slowly, Rachel's face came into view, and Quinn moved a hand away from her painfully red ear to reach towards the sight of the warm human. She didn't know why Rachel was crying, but she wiped the tears softly as they came, not allowing Rachel to get any closer. She closed her eyes again, not as harshly as to see the stars. The oxygen was drying them out so much it hurt. She felt a shuffle in the carpet, and Rachel's breath on her hand before another one enclosed it.

She really didn't want to move now. Everything that she did got her hurt in some way, and allowing Rachel into her life was no different. She moved her knees slightly away from her chest, whimpering at the assault on her ribs.

"Quinn, what's wrong?" Rachel had moved, she heard it. The warm hand wasn't on top of hers anymore. It was instead lifting her shirt to see her back. Quinn quickly rolled over, pinning Rachel's hands behind her back in what must be an uncomfortable position for both of them. "Quinn, please let me see your chest. It shouldn't hurt to breath."

"I'm fine." The lie came out so easily, her throat burning as she spoke. Her voice was raspy and scratched something fierce, but she didn't care.

"No you're not, I can hear it. Let me see what happened to your chest." Rachel pulled her hands out from under Quinn's back, and the two looked at each other somberly. Quinn's eyes were red and raw from crying so hard, tears still flowing free, but the gasping breathing had stopped.

Was it worth another hit if she didn't show Rachel her bruises? Slowly, Quinn moved her hands pulling her top down. She pressed them against her eyes as Rachel slowly lifted her shirt to see the purple bruise all down her ribs.

"Quinn…" She knew what Rachel was going to say. Who did this to you, why did you let them, why didn't you fight back? She didn't want to answer any of the questions, and Rachel knew that, because she didn't say much more. The brunette stood and walked away, leaving Quinn's exposed abdomen. She felt the tears wet her palms. She shouldn't have expected much more. Rachel barely scratched the surface of all her problems, and she had already left.

A thump landed beside her, and she slowly moved her hands at the chilling cream on her ribs and stomach. Rachel's hair was in her face as she was rubbing a white cream on her bare stomach. The heat from the bruises felt faint compared to the soothing cream, and Quinn exhaled, feeling like her lungs were about to collapse. She was ready to stop Rachel the minute the brunette's hands decided to travel. "How does that feel?"

"Better…" Quinn yawned, realizing how tense she was at the words. "Maybe we should get to class. I don't want your dads to hate me even more for keeping you from being an academic genius."

She saw Rachel's smile through her still blurry vision and grinned back weakly, one hand gently resting on the brunette's thigh. "Quinn, my dads are at work. I heard Dad leave when I went to get the cream. They think I'll be at school, and if we skip the day I can delete the message before they get home tonight." Rachel kept the circular pattern on Quinn's bruised abs, not raising her voice higher than a whisper. "Let's just stay home for the day, alright?"

"I thought you wanted to go to school?" Quinn kept her breaths even, staring at Rachel's ceiling, trying to keep her thoughts simple. If she could keep her anxious spirit at bay, she wouldn't have another break down, and it would be ok. She sighed, feeling Rachel's hand keeping its steady flow.

"Quinn, I need you to be ok before I think about sitting in a class for a few hours. My marks are fine, you're not. I know where my focus needs to be." The whispered words wove their way into Quinn's head, and she felt her heart rate calming, settling down as Rachel finished her course. Slowly, the motions stopped, and Quinn closed her eyes, lying on the carpet, the only sound was her stomach growling. "You skipped breakfast again?"

"No, I didn't have any food in my fridge. I would've eaten it if I could." Quinn took Rachel's hands as she pulled her up. "I was actually hungry this morning." She could feel the tension settling like a cloud on the two of them, and wordlessly Quinn wrapped her arms around the smaller girl. "I'm sorry Rach,"

Not a sound came out of the brunette, and Quinn knew she had done something wrong. She shouldn't have come over here, she should've run. Rachel deserved better. She had to explain everything over breakfast. She couldn't let another morning go by with her pretending like everything was ok, when everything was so clearly wrong.

-.-.-.-.-.-

"You do know I'm telling my fathers about this." Rachel said clearly through bites of breakfast that make Quinn nearly choke on her fruit. "You seem surprised." Rachel looked incredulously at her girlfriend before turning back to the paper.

"Why? I told you I can handle all of this. You don't have to get the adults involved too." Quinn scowled, sipping at her orange juice before wolfing down the plate of bacon.

"You must think I'm crazy. I have a very clear idea of what would've happened to me if your father got to me. My parents are going to hear about this." Rachel gently reached across the table, taking Quinn's hand in hers. "I know you can protect me, but everyone needs help once in a while. Let me help you Quinn." She rubbed the top of Quinn's hand with her thumb, clearly a relaxing motion to the blonde who just glaring at her underneath the familiar black hat.

"Why don't you trust me?" Quinn whispered, playing with the food on her plate before taking another small bite. Rachel sighed, choosing her words are carefully before ploughing forward.

"Quinn, I trust that you'll talk to me about the important things. I have trust in you that you'll keep my secrets and protect me. But this is too big for either of us to handle by ourselves. I want you to be able to trust me enough to tell me everything, and I want you to trust me to know when to give in." Rachel kept a firm grip on Quinn's hand as the blonde tried to pull away. "Trust me now."

Quinn looked like a scared rabbit right now, looking at Rachel with hazel eyes so big they looked like saucers. Rachel didn't let go of her hand, softly rubbing circles on it. This wasn't how the conversations were supposed to go, but this wasn't something she was going to let fall upon deaf ears. Someone was going to hear about this.

"But they'll hate me…" Quinn whispered, pushing aside the food with her free hand. She felt sick, really sick right now. "You're all I've got... I really can't lose you…"

Rachel sucked in her breath, getting up from the chair and hugging Quinn tightly, feeling the blonde tremble under her touch. "You aren't going to lose me. I promise I'll be here for you," She pressed Quinn closer to her, the vanilla scent taking them both, and she felt like bawling herself. "You have to trust me. If this has to work, we need trust." She tugged off the hat, running her fingers through Quinn's hair as the blonde cried.

"Alright…" Quinn murmured, sniffling as Rachel sat on her lap. "I trust you." Three small words that meant the world to Quinn. She couldn't remember the last time she'd said them to a living being, if she ever said them, at all. Her arms wrapped around the smaller one on her lap, pressing her face against Rachel's neck as she cried the last of her tears. Her head was swimming as she opened her eyes, feeling like she was safe for the first time in all her life.

How long would this last? How much time would pass until the anxiety began again. How long would it take to get her knee deep in fear yet another time? Her mind wandered until she felt Rachel's hand pulling her back, drawing her face from the soft skin to press a kiss against her lips. Quinn closed her eyes, smiling softly as Rachel drew her in more, refusing to take it far. She didn't care all that much, she was fine with simple gestures. The small ones were the ones that meant the most.

Softly nibbling at Rachel's lip, she inhaled Rachel's unique scent, the pungency of the cinnamon making her head spin. Rachel's hands didn't wander past her cheeks, but she didn't want anything to come from this. Scaring Rachel away today was not on her to-do list. Rachel trusted her… that was the scary thing. As they kissed, Quinn's mind reeled. Rachel actually trusted her, and she was going to break it beyond repair. She was a freak that the brunette wouldn't dare stay with after she had revealed her skeletons.

Quinn could feel something stirring in her pants, and she wasn't certain how Rachel would take to it. She gently pulled away from her girlfriend's soft lips, their foreheads touching lightly. Rachel's hands were still on her cheeks, and Quinn rested a hand in her elbow. "I trust you…" The whisper came again, so quiet that she wasn't sure if she said it.

Rachel's lips brushed on hers again, and she smiled weakly. "Thank you," Rachel's words echoed loudly in her head, and she nodded.

The brunette climbed off her lap, clearing the breakfast dishes quickly before sitting beside Quinn, pulling their chairs closer together. The blonde was still staring blankly at her lap, and Rachel's eyes swept over the exposed skin, looking at the faint yellow bruises underneath the layers of concealer. "What do you want to do today?"

"Whatever you want. Let's enjoy our last day together." Quinn spoke sadly, looking up at Rachel.

"I promised you that I'm not letting my dads keep us apart, and I intend on keeping that promise. So tell me what it is that you want to do and we'll do it." Rachel stretched, leaning forward to swipe another one of Quinn's kisses before taking the blonde's hand and wheeling her to the front door. "Let's go shopping!"

"Oh yes please." Quinn sounded sarcastic again, which was a good sign. "I really would love to spend the day carrying your shopping bags."

"Hey, I can carry my own things. I have been in a few fights you know." Rachel laughed at Quinn's eye roll, tugging on her boots while Quinn slipped on the familiar, albeit wet, Batman sneakers.

"I know you're strong, but it's called chivalry, and something tells me you might like to do a lot of shopping." Quinn laughed as Rachel swatted at her, trying to get back in the swing of things before they went into the real world. "Besides, you need more skinny jeans than the birthday and purple ones. And some more shirts, instead of those things you call clothes."

Rachel faked offense, breaking the act slightly as Quinn kissed her. "What's wrong with my clothes?"

"They're too baggy first of all; I do like to have something to look whenever possible. You also should get your own concert shirts, although I like seeing you in my stuff." Quinn kissed Rachel again, not wanting anything more to happen now. In her head, she reasoned that she didn't want sex until all her bruises had disappeared, if Rachel even wanted it after she revealed everything.

Her dad would never stop beating her. Even if Rachel could get rid of him, he would find a way to get to her. The bruises would never really go away. They would just pale out long enough for him to come and bring them out again.

"That's sweet." Rachel grinned at her, "I wouldn't mind seeing you in some of my stuff."

"It would be too small on me tiny." Quinn smiled back, tugging on her jacket as Rachel put on a puffball of a coat.

"That's kind of the point." Quinn blushed furiously at Rachel's voice, pulling the long shirt over her jeans. "Anyways, if you really don't want to go shopping, there's this rink near the community centre a few towns over, if you're willing to drive out."

"Skating and skipping school; aren't I the romantic." Quinn held out her hand, Rachel taking it softly, leading the two to the car.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

_Quinn Fabray is 3 years old. She just had her birthday a few days ago. She runs up the steps to her grandparents' home, jumping over the rocks that block her path, clutching the Cinderella doll in her arms tightly, looking down at the smooth clean dress and the golden hair. Her back hurts from where Father had hit her with the belt, and she stops on the top of the stone steps, wondering how she can ring the doorbell. _

_She stands on her tip toes, trying to jump up to reach the doorbell. She's still too small. She drags a flowerpot over to where she's standing, and stands on the dirt, on her toes so she can reach the bell. She jumps off the dirt and looks down at her stained dress. She winces as her back stings a little, and her thighs hurt a lot too. She holds tightly to the doll as Grandpa opens the door, adjusting his glasses to look down at her. _

"_Well, it seems that no one's at the door." His gravelly voice makes her smile, and she giggles. "What ghost is making that sound?"_

"_It's me Grandpa!" She laughs as Grandpa looks down at her, grinning with his white dentures._

"_Quinnie, there you are! You're so small I could barely see you," Quinn grinned as her Grandpa leaned down and picked her up, hugging her tightly. _

"_I'm not that small Grandpa, you said Mother was this small when she was my age." Quinn smiles, her Grandpa's beard scratches her cheek as he kisses her, his hair is white like snow. His eyes are blue like water. _

"_Oh yes, that's true. I guess it must run in the family." He says, carrying Quinn into the kitchen. She smiles, seeing Grandma at the table reading her paper. Her hair is a brown still, not grey likes Grandpa's. Mother says it's called hair dye. _

"_Quinn darling why are you here so early?" Grandma doesn't expect an answer because she already knows. Grandpa puts her down and she hugs her Grandma just as tightly, putting Cinderella on the table. _

"_Mother wanted me to come tell you big news." Quinn sits at the table beside her Grandpa playing solitaire. She snacked hungrily on the strawberries in front of her, smiling as Grandma pushes a glass of milk her way. _

"_And what news would that be sweetheart?" Grandma looks worried. Quinn doesn't know why, she hasn't even told her the news yet. _

"_We're moving. Mother just wanted me to tell you that. She said if you want any information you should call her. I didn't hear anything, Father sent me to my room after that. He went to work already so Mother sent me over." Quinn didn't say anything else as she attacked the strawberries. Father wasn't letting her have big breakfast's anymore and she was always hungry. _

_She looked up when Grandma wasn't saying anything and Grandpa was just looking at her. He looked tired, they both did. She swallowed the strawberry. "Is something wrong Grandma?" _

"_No sweetie, nothing's wrong. Why don't you go watch some tv?" Grandma smiled at her, and she nodded. She stood up, taking a few more strawberries and Cinderella before Grandpa pushed the plate towards her. _

"_Take them downstairs if you want Quinn, did you have breakfast this morning?" Grandpa's eyes looked bluer today._

"_Not a big one, only a bit of toast and milk." She stood up, feeling the back of her dress clinging to her skin. She took the bowl, and started down the stairs, running down actually. She tossed Cinderella on the couch and the berries on the table before running up the steps, sitting on the top one. The carpet dug into her thighs, which already hurt._

_She leaned against the wall, and listened. _

"_I knew he would do something like this. He wants her to suffer Albert, both of them." Grandma sounded really mad. "And he makes her call him Father, Judy didn't get a say in that child's upbringing. Who knows what Quinn is going through?" _

"_What evidence do we have against him Maggie? He's a fucking bastard who doesn't deserve to raise our granddaughter. All we've heard from Judy or Quinn is that's he's a tight-ass who doesn't let either of them get the final say." She heard Grandpa shuffle his cards, twirling the ends of her dress around her finger. _

_She heard the chair scraping the tile, and Grandma started to pace, her heels going click, click, click on the tile. Mother calls them eccentric, but Quinn thinks that they're colorful and pretty. _

"_What if he's hurting Quinn?" There's her name again, Grandma's talking about her. "You and I both know he's ashamed of her; he hates that she's not like everyone else." _

_Grandma and Grandpa knew about her condition too? She didn't know that, but it made sense. She spent a lot of time here as a baby. She plays with the fraying ends of her dress, looking at her muddy white socks. Father is hitting her, but she can't say that to Grandma. Father will beat her real bad if she said anything, he promised her that. _

"_We could bug the house." Grandpa usually joked about his security stuff, but this time he sounded serious. She leans against the wall, one hand against it, leaving berry juice on the wallpaper._

"_I wish you would. I don't trust Russell with Quinn. Judy's made it clear that she's not leaving him." Grandma sounds really sad about that, and she wants to go in the kitchen and give her a big hug to make her feel better. "How do you feel about our granddaughter in another state with that man?" _

"_Even if he is doing something, we don't have proof. Quinn's too young to testify, and court would be stressful. She certainly won't say anything of her own according. Don't you remember Christmas, how scared she was of her own father? It's clear he's threatening her, but she won't say anything and that's where we lose." Grandpa sounds sad too, and she wants to run in and give both of them a big hug. _

_She doesn't want to leave her grandparents, but she hasn't really thought that's what would happen. She just knows she's moving, but she hasn't thought about what she's leaving behind. She starts to sniffle quietly as she thought about being alone with Father and Mother in a new place, so far away from Grandma and Grandpa. Mother put cream on her cuts now, but when she gets older Mother will stop. _

_Quinn stands up, quietly going back to the basement again. She trusts her grandparents, and she has to leave them now too. She looks at Cinderella quietly, smoothing back the blonde hair again and looking into the corner of the basement with Grandpa's drawing kits. _

_She shouldn't go here, but it doesn't matter now. She looks around for a hazel marker, because that's the color of her eyes, but she doesn't find one. She finds a light brown, and that'll have to do. She colors over the blue in Cinderella's eyes, making the doll more like herself. Grandpa always calls her his little princess, so now she's Cinderella and a princess in real life too. _

"_My grandparents gave me you for my birthday." She whispers to the doll. "When I move, you're going to be the only thing that I have to remember them. Promise me you'll always stay with me, and I can trust you will all my secrets?" Quinn smiles softly at the doll, nodding its head. _

"_Thank you Cinderella, I need someone to be able to talk to. Father will stop hitting me, I trust that. He'll stop. It's just been a bad week for him, with all the moving. He'll stop." She whispers, smiling softly, her eyes hurt from the tears. "And you'll be with me when he does stop. You'll see how I can be really happy and everything. I love Disney stuff Cinderella, I have a Minnie Mouse pillow at my house that I love, and you'll see it. I'm sorry I was so mean to you yesterday; I've just never had a doll before. We can be best friends now. "_

_She stands up, sitting on the table to eat strawberries and watch The Little Mermaid. Mother will come for her when she's been gone long enough, so she can stay here as long as she wants. _

_Maybe Mother will never come and get her and she can live with Grandma and Grandpa until she was an adult. No, that's a bad thought. She should love her Mother and Father; that was a commandment or something like it. Father wants her to learn all of them, but she can't remember them. He beat her bad last night when she couldn't remember. But she wants to stay here and never leave. She likes Maine, even when it rained and thunder stormed._

_Playing in the rain is one of her favorite things in the world. It's wonderful. She loves swimming in the ocean too, and playing with the rocks. It's so much fun to be in water, and it always makes her feel calm, and safe. Quinn smiles to herself, wondering what it would be like to live underwater like Flounder. _

"_I can't wait to starting pre-school Cinderella, I'll make so many friends and have them over to play and I'll be like Ariel and have a best friend. You're my best friend too, but I can't wait to have a friend who can talk to me back. Having friends must be nice." She hugs the doll, and eats more strawberries. _

_She hears footsteps coming down the stairs, and it's Grandpa. She smiles big at him, and he smiles back, but he still looks sad. She turns back to the cartoons, hearing Grandpa shuffle around in his art things. "Quinn, come here for a moment." She turns, seeing him holding a pencil case, and she gets up to go to him. _

"_Yes Grandpa?" She stands in front of him, her hands behind her back. _

"_This is for you." He waits for her to open her hands, and she takes the pencil case, seeing the colorful markers and pencils inside. They look very formal, like something a real artist would use. "Promise me that you will never let your father see this case. If anything happens, and me and Grandma don't see you for a long while, keep this case. Promise Quinn?" _

"_I promise Grandpa." She nods her head, and looks through the pencils and markers, wondering how she'll learn how to use them. "But Grandpa, how can I use them, they're for a real artist like you."_

"_You'll learn Quinnie, I trust you." Grandpa kneels down to her level, his eyes twinkling._

"_But you can't teach me, how can I learn?" She says sadly, almost crying. She wants to cry because she wants to keep seeing her grandparents. _

"_You'll learn. You're an artist; it's in your blood. You get it from me." He says, standing up again and taking her hand. "You get a lot of things from your Grandma and myself." _

_He shuts off the tv, taking the empty bowl in his hand, and giving Cinderella back to her. She holds the doll tightly, afraid of losing it as well. She doesn't ever want to forget her grandparents, and she has a bad feeling that Father will really want her too. _

"_Where are we going Grandpa?" She doesn't want to waste time. She's young, yes, but she knows bad feelings when they happen. _

"_I want to show you some family history before you leave. I think you'll like learning about genealogy." He says softly, helping her up the steps with her hands full. _

"_What's that?" She doesn't know too many big words; Father doesn't use them around her because he says she's stupid. _

"_It's the study of family lineage, or your ancestors, people who came before you. Like your Grandma's grandmother and further back. We both have an interest in it, maybe you will too." He says as he takes her upstairs, into the big library room with all the photo albums. _

"_Grandpa," She says, sitting in a big chair holding her things. "Am I the only one in the family with… my condition?" Her cheeks blush bright red, but he shakes his head. _

"_No Quinn, you're not the first to have this, and sadly probably not the last. You have to promise me something else. You have to promise me that you will never be ashamed of yourself. No matter what your father says to you; you are your own person, and be proud of it." Grandpa inhales sharply and she thinks he might cough, but he doesn't. He blows dust off a photo album. _

"_Quinn, don't let that bastard get to you. You're special, and you're loved. Until the day we die, your Grandma and myself will be here for you. Always remember that." He smiles at her, his eyes twinkling under his white hair. She nods, smiling softly back._

"_I promise Grandpa," She hugs him tightly before looking at the photos, enjoying her Grandpa explaining each one._

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"So do you still have that pencil case?" Rachel squeezed Quinn's hand gently as she explained her earliest memory, sipping the hot chocolate from the quick stop at Coffee Talk.

"Yeah, it's the one I use at school. I don't use the pencils or markers a lot." Quinn sighed, taking a bite of the strawberry muffin. "I think some part of me is still waiting to go back and have my Grandpa teach me how to properly use them. I don't want to waste them on my cartoons." She smiled, thinking about the maps and boats he used to draw. "Rach, you should've seen them. He could probably draw the Mona Lisa better than Da Vinci. He could sketch the Cysteine Chapel Roof in an hour and it would still be awesome."

"I believe it; you have great talent from him." Rachel smiled, looking back at the road as Quinn sighed. She had revealed too much about her childhood on the drive, nothing of great magnitude, but a lot of childhood memories. She told Rachel about how she nearly shaved her head at age 10, and Christmas in the basement, and her grandparents. So much had come out, and she felt so much lighter, more trusting maybe. "We're here, turn in the parking lot."

Quinn veered into the parking lot, looking at the skating rink in the middle of the pine trees. Rachel was right, it was picturesque. "Did you remember the skates?"

"I thought you had them in your trunk…" The two turned to look at each other before bursting out laughing at their own stupidity.

"So we just drove for an hour, to go skating… in our socks?" Quinn said between chuckles.

"I guess so." Rachel giggled, putting the hot chocolate down before she spilt it. "Now what do we do?"

"We'll I think we should run onto the rink in our boots, but that's just my opinion, and I don't want to get kicked off." Quinn shrugged, still grinning; looking at the employees huddled near a toll booth for the rink. The drive had been worth it, even if there wasn't anything at the end.

"We could just go to the Christmas tree farm near here, and spend the day there; it's like a winter carnival with sleigh rides and face painting and everything." Rachel thought about how far it was. "And it's only 10 minutes from here."

"I thought you were Jewish, why would you know about a Christmas tree farm?" Quinn pulled out of the parking lot, glad she didn't pay the toll to get in, and got back on the road.

"I told you, it's like a winter carnival. We didn't go for the trees." Rachel nudged Quinn playfully as the blonde drove. "So what else did you do during your childhood?"

"You want another story? Jeez, I thought you would get tired by now." Quinn smiled, thinking about what else she could say. "When I was younger, I thought I was a vampire because I never slept at night. This one time, I jumped out of my second story window, with my doll and went to this creek at one am. I started singing Disney songs when I played in it, and I saw these fireflies in the pipe leading out. I thought that pipe took me to the ocean."

Quinn sighed, thinking of that night. "I wished on the fireflies, hoping for a dog, some friends, and something else…"

"What was that?" Rachel's hand never left Quinn's as they drove around.

"I wished for a princess of my very own." Quinn kissed Rachel's hand as she saw the sign for the tree farm come into view. "At least one came true. Now this place is closed, so what are we supposed to do?"

"I have no idea. The town here should have a spot for lunch that we could go to. Breakfast didn't count for much." Rachel smiled at the large main cabin, and the scent of pine that came through the window. It was so picturesque, she loved it here.

"Lunch it is." Pulling out of the lot again, Quinn drove back to the small town they had passed through here. It wasn't a town; so much as it was a long street with many small buildings on it and houses going off sporadically from side streets. "I'm getting so much déjà vu now."

"Maybe where you were born, it was this small and you're just remembering it." Rachel gripped her hand tightly and she nodded.

"You're probably right." Quinn looked around for any type of food, finally seeing a small sandwich place beside a bookstore. "Ok, we can eat, or we can go and look at all the vintage books."

"Books," Rachel sipped the lukewarm hot chocolate, smiling as Quinn pulled up on the road beside the store. She shivered in her coat, smiling as Quinn, ever the gentleman, helped her out of the car. Maybe, sometime in the far future, they could go back to Maine, with the rocky beach and this old house that Quinn could remember. She could help Quinn remember the good times that she had, which sound scarcer the longer she thought about it.

"Wow," Quinn inhaled in the shop, looking around to see a set of stairs. It smelled like worn paper, and old reads, and memories. Each of these novels had clearly been read and reread by owners, enjoying them. "I think I love it here."

She ventured between the shelves, pulling out an atlas of the world before anything, shifting through the pages. "Man, this thing is old. Look at Canada, there isn't Nunavut yet." She slid it back in the shelf, running her fingers over the spines of the historical texts. "I seriously love this place."

"So can I now find you here after school?" Rachel smiled, slipping her hand around Quinn's waist.

"Hello," Both girls jumped at the voice, and looked up to see a shaggy, scrawny kid with big glasses. "Do you need help with anything?"

"Fiction?" Quinn shrugged, watching as the kid nodded before pointing up the stairs.

"Just upstairs and it's on every shelf but the last three, those are biographies." He smiled, revealing a mouthful of braces.

"Thanks, kid. Shouldn't you be at school though?" Quinn looked down at the gawky pre-teen.

"It was a snow day because the roads are so icy. My mom had me work here because my dad's at work and she's sick." He nodded before heading back to the cash, reading one of the dusty books behind it. "Just call me if you need anything, I'm Patrick."

"Thank you!" Rachel called to him, smiling. "Such a sweet boy."

"You really want to be a mom, don't you?" Quinn smiled, her hand entwined with Rachel's as they went up the narrow staircase, seeing the mazes of books in front of them. "Let's just live here, it'll be quiet and relaxing and there's always entertainment. "

"We can own a small house when we're older." Rachel said the words quickly, not thinking about them.

"When we get married, you mean?" Quinn kissed Rachel softly before tugging her down an aisle; she wasn't going to overanalyze this. Rachel was already doing that for her. If they stayed together past high school, that would be amazing. If they did get together later, it would be… she wouldn't be able to describe it if she could.

"Perhaps." Rachel whispered. She let go of Quinn's hand so the blonde could freely browse the books, running her fingers over the spines, looking for a title. Rachel looked around, looking at the titles herself. "What exactly are you looking for?"

"I like classics, and 50's pulp novels, which you can never find… ever." Quinn smiled as she pulled out a novel, smiling. "Like this, you could never find this in a normal bookstore."

"What is that?" Rachel took the spine, looking at it. "The Price of Salt… interesting… I found this for you."

"Thanks," Quinn took 1984 from Rachel, smiling. "I actually really loved this one. The concept of dystopian futures is really cool." Quinn realised how much her limbs were killing her, and she winced as she handed both covers back to Rachel. "It's just how the people try and struggle against the higher power, its good. When I was younger, I read the Giver at school, and I actually stole the school's copy when my family moved in the middle of the year."

"A little klepto were you?" Rachel noticed Quinn's jerking movements. The heat in the car must've been helping; this cold didn't do anything for aching joints. "Let's pay for the books and go back to my house. I can get you some heating pads for your arms, and we can go to school tomorrow if you feel like you can move."

"Sure, sounds good." Quinn smiled softly, Rachel helping her down the stairs. "Hey kid, we're ready to pay, start up the register!"

* * *

**Flashback summary: Quinn, age 3 is leaving Maine and her last sense of safety for a long time. Her grandparents are seen here. **

***And if the last part didn't seem realistic, Quinn doesn't want Rachel to talk about her scars. Basically... she wants everything to stay the same, and keep the familiar lightheartedness of a teenage relationship. **


	14. Chasing Cars

**Alright! Up before a month has passed! Perhaps my sense of time is getting better? I don't know. Anyways, moving on. Here is the new chapter! I went on writing kick last week and everything came out and I just wrote and wrote and this happened. Hopefully it's good. If not, I tried... **

**So I don't think there's a huge need for a warning in this chapter, just a lot of triggers for Quinn. I'm just going to say it. Warning! Child abuse, sexual abuse, mental abuse. **

**Third order of business, mega thanks to everyone who reviewed and followed and favourite. Almost 200 flippin' reviews! You people rock! **

**Anyways, Christmas/Hanukkah hasn't even happened in the story, just keeping the time line clear, and... that's pretty much it. Now the pieces are set, and everything is going to come crashing, so hopefully these writing kicks will happen a lot more often because things here are now in order, planned and everything. This is pretty much the beginning of the middle section, where everything happens. Is this spoiling? I don't know, I apologize.**

**Have a great weekend everyone!**

* * *

Everything hurt. It was a kind of pain she could feel in her bones, digging further into her with every movement. So she had simply stopped moving. The dim lights in Rachel's bedroom weren't helping her pounding headache and the heating pads on her arms and back were uncomfortable. However, the soft bed was a change from her couch, and she was so tired after running around that tiny winter town for most of the morning.

Rachel hugged her waist tightly, and she turned her head, looking at the tiny brunette. This was the third Streisand flick they had watched today, and her dads still weren't home. Maybe she could get away without having to explain anything.

"You know, I don't think we've ever discussed your obsession with drag queens." Rachel smiled, feeling Quinn's slight chuckle.

"I didn't realize I was so obsessed with drag queens." Quinn gently moved her aching arm to Rachel's head, spinning strands of silky brown hair around her fingers. "Why do you mention it?"

"Because I have seen you impersonating scenes from Pink Flamingos, To Wong Foo and Priscilla Desert Queen in my bathroom when you think I'm asleep." Rachel rolled over, facing Quinn, Barbra still in the background. She smiled, watching Quinn's fingers loop around her hair strands before she answered.

"First of all, it's Priscilla Queen of the Desert. And it's not an obsession. I'd just really like to be friends with a drag queen." Quinn closed her eyes, feeling Rachel's hand cover hers. It was so nice in this bed, Rachel just lying on top of her. The pillow on her lap was a good cover up, just in case. Neither said anything, mainly because Rachel knew Quinn was too tired to continue with conversation.

She turned around, facing the television again and seeing her elliptical tucked in the corner of her bedroom. It hadn't been used once since she had begun dating Quinn, but the blonde had her running around so much that it hadn't been necessary. It was so quiet tonight, the sun had already set, and school had already been let out.

The phone rang, interrupting both, and Rachel heard Quinn moan as she moved to get it. She smiled, looked at her riled girlfriend, softly moving her hand around looking for her. "Give me a second sweetie, the phone's ringing." She murmured close to Quinn, and the blonde nodded, rolling her head over to sleep again.

Rachel dashed to the phone on her chest of drawers on the other side of the room, fumbling with it before picking it up.

"Rachel?" Her Dad's voice came through the line and she breathed a sigh of relief. It was so hard impersonating them to the school secretaries.

"Hi Dad, where are you?" She gripped the phone, relieved that it was her father.

"Well, your Daddy got invited over to a colleague's house tonight for dinner, so we'll be home late. Is Quinn with you?" He sounded concerned, and she didn't want to know why. Being in the house alone never really comforted her as a child, and now it was a hell of a lot worse.

"Yes, we came here after school let out." Rachel lied. Half lied, because Quinn was here.

"That's good. You can invite Brittany over if you want as well, I know you don't like being alone that often." He sounded concerned, which was nice. Her dads were so busy sometimes, but they cared and they showed it.

"Thanks Dad. Have fun tonight." She smiled into the phone.

"I'll try sweetheart, I just want to be home right now. I've got a splitting headache. I love you."

"Love you too Dad. Bye." Rachel clicked off the home phone, running down the stairs to lock the door and turn on the alarm. She had a thing about really not wanting to be home alone now. She grabbed two Cola's from the fridge before running upstairs to her girlfriend.

She set the cans down on her nightstand, running her fingers through Quinn's matted blonde hair. She felt hot to the touch, and Rachel knew she had a fever, insisting Quinn stay under the blankets to sweat it out. She poked a straw into the can, and stuck it through Quinn's open lips, the blonde taking a small suck before moaning again, trying to flip onto her stomach.

"It's ok Quinn…" Rachel calmed her, keeping her hand steady on Quinn's forehead, noticing the bright red on her girl's flushed cheeks. "I'm here. You'll feel better in the morning. Just drink a little now." She whispered, Quinn slowly opening her eyes and nodding, sipping the coke softly.

"Are your dads coming home?" Quinn whispered her voice scratchy.

"Not anytime soon. They're having dinner at a colleague's house." Rachel stroked Quinn's face, feeling the heat under her palm. "We're going to be home alone for the next few hours, and I was about to call Brittany and invite her over. But you're sick."

Quinn chuckled softly, Rachel didn't know what to make of it. "What are you laughing at?" Rachel looked at her, poking the straw through her lips again.

"Call Brittany, invite her over. I can have some Tylenol and survive. I know you don't like being home alone, and if I'm bedridden with a fever, I doubt I can tackle a robber. Another friendly body in the house will do good." Quinn murmured, closing her eyes and rolling on her side under the blanket before determining it was too much pain and shifting on her back.

"Alright." Rachel looked at her, smiling softly. "Would you like a cold compress?"

"No, just some pills and I'll be fine." Quinn whispered, still seemingly dead tired. But she was such a damn good liar Rachel couldn't tell. She ran her fingers through the blonde hair again, now so matted with sweat that it stood up by itself.

She dialed Brittany's number, listening to the ringtone before the tall blonde answered.

"H-Hello?" Another sad blonde. Rachel shook her head as she heard the tears in Britt's voice. So much stress in her life right now and it seemed that these teenage problems were posing more of a challenge then Quinn's daddy issues. At least a call to the cops could rescue her girlfriend.

"Hey Britt, what's wrong?" Rachel huddled over the phone, her free palm still on Quinn's forehead.

"C-can I come over and talk?" Brittany sounded destroyed, and Rachel shook her head, Quinn looking up at her.

"Of course. Come over as soon as you can." Rachel closed her eyes, and she felt Quinn nod under her hand. Both understood.

"I'm coming now." The dial tone sounded, and Rachel tossed her cell back on her nightstand, pulling Quinn into a tight hug, lying like that for what seemed like forever.

"Santana's a bitch." Rachel mumbled, looking at Quinn's wild hair, spiking it up even more.

"I could've told you that." The blonde laughed lightly, still obviously sore. "What are you doing to my hair?"

"Making it look cooler." Rachel giggled, brushing back Quinn's bangs so they stuck straight in the air. "You could totally pull off a Mohawk."

"Is that an invitation to get one?" Quinn raised an eyebrow at the little brunette, and moaned when Rachel playfully smacked her shoulder under the blanket.

"No it's not. I like that you're growing it out. When you're old enough to get a tattoo without a parental signature, then you can do whatever you want to your hair." Rachel laughed, kissing Quinn without any regard for the fever.

"You're going to get sick." Quinn opened her mouth for another sip of the Cola, sucking on the straw again.

"I really don't care." Rachel rebutted, kissing her again. "You love me, and you don't care who knows it. You treat me like a genuine princess, and I fucking love that. I love you so much Quinn…" She kissed Quinn softly, enjoying the little kisses. She knew Quinn probably had too much of a headache to do more than butterfly kisses, brushing her lips softly against the blonde's cheek and forehead.

"I love you too baby." Quinn fell back on the pillow as Rachel's lips trailed on her face. She wanted something more than this, and truly hated being sick. "Hopefully this bug is only 24 hours."

"And why is that?" the doorbell rang, but until she got a text from Brittany, she wasn't going to open it.

"Maybe I want something more than a kiss." Quinn bit her lip. She did want something more, something she couldn't give to Rachel now… or ever. Rachel wouldn't love her anymore, not with this thing attached to her body.

"When you feel better, we can do whatever you're comfortable doing." Rachel whispered, feeling her phone buzz in her palm, kissing Quinn's hot cheek. "It's Britt. She's at the door. I'll bring you up some Tylenol and some Ginger Ale." Quinn nodded softly, the warm skin moving under her palm.

Rachel rushed down the stairs, taking them two at a time. She opened the door, pulling a still crying Brittany inside the house before running into the kitchen for the Tylenol bottle.

"Britt, what's wrong. What happened to you?" Rachel hugged the sobbing blonde, easing her up the stairs to see Quinn sitting upright in the bed, the heating pad still against her lower back. She tossed her girlfriend the pill bottle, watching as Quinn quickly swallowed two of them without any water.

"She…. And he…. They…. They…" Rachel sat Brittany on the bed, watching as the taller girl pulled her knees to her chest and cried.

"Britt, what happened to that bitch?" Quinn spoke, her throat sounded like it had been marred with razor blades. "Can I beat her up after this?"

"N-no…. that's bad too Quinn…" Brittany laughed, noticing Quinn's wild hair and red cheeks. "Are you f-feeling alright?" She sniffled.

"Just a small cold. I can't move though well, I hurt my back." Her gravelly voice spoke, and Rachel moved over, slipping easily into her arms. "What happened with her though? Britt, I swear I will find her and gun her down."

"You do that, and I'll kill you. The last thing I want is you in prison for I don't know how long." Rachel whispered, grabbing Brittany's arm and pulling her to Quinn's feet.

"Fine." Quinn rolled her eyes, grabbing Rachel tightly. It was obvious what they had was going to last quite a while. Quinn was fiercely protective of the tiny brunette, and holding her now, clear to anyone watching in that Quinn would clearly do anything for the girl.

Rachel in turn, loved having a protector, loved the feeling that someone was there. She was giving Quinn everything she had, everything she had ever wanted for herself. She was pouring her heart into this relationship, and expecting Quinn to give herself just as freely. Rachel knew it would take a while to drill out the real Quinn, yet she seemed willing to wait for that moment.

"Britt." Rachel's voice cut through the silence, reaching out to the taller blonde. "Please tell us what happened."

"She… I called her, and she said I could come over. I… I drove over to her house… and I saw Puck at getting out of his car. He… he just came up to me… relax Quinn he didn't hurt me." Brittany saw the fire flash in her eyes as Puck's name was mentioned, and how her knuckles whitened around Rachel's shoulder.

"Continue…" Rachel rubbed Quinn's side gently, feeling her forehead gently; glad to see the fire burning in her temples was going out.

"He asked why I was there and… I said Santana had called me… and he said that San had called him too, and told me I should just go. She doesn't want to date me… she just wants to get rid of me…" Brittany fell onto the bed at Quinn's legs, her head in Quinn's lap, and she cried. For a while, it stayed like that, the television playing softly as Brittany sniffled. Quinn felt something stir in her, her stomach beginning to convulse.

"Britt, you don't need to feel tied to her anymore." Quinn whispered, unsure of how to console the sobbing blonde. Rachel clung tightly to one side of her, and to be quite honest, she could have survived the night just hugging her girlfriend. Neither felt to safe alone in the bedroom, just in case. A bitter taste came into Quinn's mouth, thinking about the bitch who had tried to hurt her so badly, and she loosened her grip on Rachel, slowly going into the bathroom to clear her head while she heard the other two talking in hushed tones.

She shut the door to Rachel's bathroom quietly, splashing cold water on her face, thinking about Rachel's agreement to call the cops. Her cheeks were a bright red from fever, and it felt like the pills had stopped working. Heat was coming off her in bursts, and she closed her eyes tightly, pounding a weak fist on the counter. Everything was coming to light now, and soon she would have to come clean.

About everything.

She nearly lost her balance as she thought about revealing all her skeletons to Rachel, opening the closet door so she could see the dusty old bones clearly. She gripped the counter, thinking of how she would love to kill her father, to maim Santana, to just… get revenge? No, she couldn't become that person.

But a part of her wanted justice, retribution. She wanted her father to hurt in ways he never imagined. She wanted Him to know what it felt like to finally stretch out limbs after being in a cramped space for hours; to know what it felt like to have a searing pain stemming from the core of his body and spreading outward. She was sick and tired of feeling such blinding pain pulsate through her fingertips; she was ready to see blood spilled, like the countless stains of hers on the wood of old houses, covered up eventually by carpet.

Splashing more water on her face, she panted, feeling her heart race. She looked in the mirror, pulling hair away from her face, the whites of her eyes staring out against her flushed face. She looked down at herself, the black shirt clinging to her frame from sweat and Rachel's tracks itchy. She tied her hair quickly, thoughts of unspeakable running circles around her head. She wanted to find him, and blow his brains out.

What had triggered this? What the hell had made her turn into this thing so quickly, so easily? Maybe it was because Brittany was innocent, and Santana was toying with it, testing it before ripping it away.

Exactly like He had done with her.

Quinn was ready for a full on shower to slow her heart rate, to calm herself before she put a hole in Rachel's wall. She could take him, and all his money and friends… she was fucking ready. Looking at her sorry appearance in the mirror made her all the more ready. She quickly took off the pants, looking at the bulge in her underwear and the red lines criss-crossing her thighs. Turning, she looked at the array of scars on the back of her legs, and she tugged up her shirt to reveal the roads of pink lines on her lower back.

Clawing off her shirt, she turned , looking back in the mirror to see the same lines crawling all over her back, uneven, different shades of red laughing at her, reminding her of every whip of the belt. Memories flooded her, ones she hadn't thought of since they happened, and she collapsed, falling onto the floor in a mess. She never thought of the cuts, the lashes on her back given as though her father was a deranged slave driver.

Leaning her forehead against the cabinets, she felt her back heat up, thinking of the crack of her father's leather whip coming down on the unbroken skin. She felt her fist tighten as she heard his voice in her head, and tears run hot down her cheeks as she thought of her own tiny screams. Every scar felt as though it were oozing heat now, throbbing with memories of the past.

She realized she hadn't taken a breath in a while, and inhaled the scents mixing around the room. Her own sweat mixed with the smell of toilet cleaner and vanilla perfume sent her stomach into knots. All she could think about now was that time, those memories, the ones she had worked so hard to keep pushed in the back of her head, and now some stupid bitch at school had awoken the 6 year old inside her, afraid of getting the belt every night.

The tile was under her back, cold and comforting. She expected to run her hands across her thighs and bring them back to see blood, her blood. The tile was keeping her grounded, keeping her aware of her surroundings. Her father's desk was never cold, it was always hot, and the wood digging into her skin as the cigarette ash was ground into her wounds. The wooden floor she landed on when he threw her out of the study was always warm and smelled of floor polish and whiskey.

Rachel was right. She had to break away from him. The first step was to stop referring to him as Father. He was not her father, he never taught her anything, never showed her any love or affection, nothing of the kind. He was Russell Fabray, the Devil incarnate. He was her abuser, her rapist, her harasser; he was the one who came into her room at night and ripped the sheets off her bed, the hair from her scalp. He was undeserving of a name.

Flashes of a younger her crossed Quinn's mind, images of herself sitting on her grandparents porch, her grandmother hugging her tightly, wishing her good luck. Her grandfather held her close, and she could smell the scent of pine trees and oil paint. She closed her eyes, seeing herself walk down their steps and into the old blue car her mother drove.

Moving day.

She cried softly, hearing the TV in the other room, wishing for her Grandpa to come in and hug her tightly like when she was younger, for her Grandma to offer her some warm food, something other than takeout or fruit. She knew Rachel would comfort her, but she couldn't get the words out. She couldn't call out to her girlfriend; the words caught in her throat and tangled, coming out as a high-pitched squeak.

More pictures of a younger, sadder Quinn raced around in her head like cars on a track. Painting in her Grandpa's room when she was younger, playing soccer at pre-school before the adults there wondered why she wasn't enrolled, sitting with her doll at the edge of a small pond. More than anything, she wanted that damn doll back. Cinderella was old and grungy and her hair was short but that doll meant everything now. That one doll was everything she had to her Grandparents. No wonder He made her leave it behind.

Quinn rolled onto her side, tugging her knees up to her chest the tile floor giving her goosebumps. She wanted to be holding her doll in her grandparent's basement again, eating a bowl of strawberries and making a fort. She wanted her childhood back, the one she never got to have. Opening her bloodshot eyes, Quinn saw a bathroom and for a split second, she thought she was back in Grandpa's bathroom.

The knock on the door, she turned slightly, and waited to hear a voice. More than anything, she wanted to listen to her Grandma sing her a soft melody until one of them could get the door unstuck.

"Quinn? Are you alright?" Rachel… she must be worried sick. Quinn ran a hand through her hair, croaking out a sorry excuse for a response.

"I'm fine." Her voice was gritty, and with both hands now around her kneecaps, she felt a soft hand smooth down her hair. The scent of pine trees came to her, and she wept freely. "I need my Grandpa." She felt a body beside her, a smaller hand on her back, and the scent of pine lingering with the sweet smell of berry perfume. The door to the bathroom closed, she heard the soft click.

"Quinn…" Rachel's voice was soft, and her fingers trailed through Quinn's damp hair.

"Rach… I need my Grandpa. Please, I need you to find him." Her grainy voice sputtered out, and she felt herself freezing suddenly. She realized she was half naked on Rachel's bathroom floor, but she didn't care. "I need my doll."

"What doll Quinn?"

"The Cinderella, my Cinderella." She didn't move from fetal position, and felt Rachel's palm on her forehead, still hot from fever. "I need it…" The tears were burning her cheeks, her face on fire like the rest of her body. She just needed a dip in the ocean to cool down, saltwater to lick her wounds and she could throw her body to the sea.

"Quinn… you said you left it in Kentucky…" Rachel's voice sounded broken, the shards stabbing her ears like knives. She put her face in her hands, crying, the heat brushing across her wrists, temples throbbing as tears wet her face.

"I'm sorry… I… I want my Grandpa… I want him to hold me again…" She wept, feeling Rachel hug her tightly.

"I'll look for him Quinn. I'll try, I promise."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Rachel set a glass of water on the nightstand, Quinn sitting on the bed, a pillow on her lap, still undressed. "I asked Brittany to go home, we would see her later. You're more important to me."

She nodded, taking a sip of water with another Tylenol. Her head was throbbing from her crying fit, and she looked at Rachel shyly. She couldn't believe her guard had been down that much, so much that she had been in pieces by the time she had been found. "I'm sorry for the little outburst."

"Don't apologize." Rachel took her hand softly, the heat burning her palm, yet she didn't say anything. "Quinn, what happened?"

"I…. I don't know. I just thought about everything…." Quinn balled her fist in the pillow, afraid to take it off her lap. She looked at the weaving on the fabric, pulling stray threads out of it slowly as she felt Rachel's gaze bore into her. "Everything came back to me so quickly, I just… I tried to control it, but it really didn't work out the way I wanted. I don't even know what caused it."

She shut up when Rachel slipped a cool hand into hers, looking at the brunette with her bloodshot eyes. Balling the pillows fabric in her hand tightly, she was so tempted to toss it off her lap and reveal herself truly to Rachel, to see if the smaller girl could take the truth. "Don't worry about it Quinn, I just want you to be safe now."

"I haven't been honest with you." Quinn blurted out, her eyes wide and burning with fear. She could feel her cheeks glow with shame, and she let go of the pillow in her hand to brush away her hair. "And I hate myself for that."

Rachel's eyes drilled into her, the soft brown orbs looking disappointed, hurt, and understanding. She inhaled deeply before continuing softly. "I know you want me to be completely honest with you; I just don't know how to do that. I also know that's a terrible excuse, but I don't know how to be honest. I never really learned how to trust anyone, and I'm sorry that you're getting the brunt of all my stupidity."

Rachel's soft hand drifted over her jawline, and she gritted her teeth, hoping this wouldn't be the last time Rachel would touch her like this. "I'm not like others." She said through gritted teeth, balling the pillow in her palm, wiping away small tears brimming in her eyes. "I'm not what you think I am."

"Quinn, what are you talking about?" Rachel kissed her softly, and she felt the wet tears burn like molten iron on her face. Rachel would never kiss her like this again, never touch her this softly after she had told her.

"It has to do with us. It's important for you to know this… if we ever want to be intimate." Quinn put a hand on Rachel's soft cheek, the fever toying with her emotions now. She looked at the chocolate eyes with longing, and although, somewhere in her heart, she knew Rachel would accept her, she was terrified. She had never shared this with anyone, not willingly. Not since she was a little girl, and she couldn't decipher the difference between normal and freakish.

"Just tell me then. We can get past whatever it is." Rachel hugged her tightly, taking her by surprise, her soft hands covering the red scars on her back. She felt Rachel's fingers trace the lines covering her spine, and she nodded into the brown hair, inhaling Rachel's scent. She felt the gentleness that was her girlfriend move over her back with such care, such delicacy, she wanted to cry.

The tears moistened Rachel's hair as Quinn enveloped the smaller girl, holding her tightly. She enjoyed this. Simplicity, calm, happiness… everything was so foreign. Slowly, she moved back, taking Rachel's hands. "I need to see your reaction with this. I need you to promise that you won't leave me."

"I promise." Rachel said softly, but convicted in her words. Quinn squeezed the smaller hands gently before continuing.

"In my family, there have been a few people who've had a problem with genetics. My Grandpa told me about when I was younger, and curious about myself instead of so ashamed." Quinn looked at Rachel, seeing the tears brim in her eyes. She knew how much the brunette hated when she talked like that about herself. But now was the time for honesty, for brutal truth. "I'm not like other girls. I'm not normal. I…. I…. I'm sorry, I'm trying Rach."

"Take you time," Rachel's hand rested on her shoulder tenderly, and she nodded, wiping the tears.

"I was born with a fully functioning penis." She said simply, sucking in her breath as she analyzed Rachel's emotions. Confusion crossed the brunette's face, followed by disbelief, and then she couldn't read it.

"What do you mean?" Rachel's hands didn't move, her body didn't tense. She hadn't been slapped yet, so that was a good sign. "Are you transgender? I mean… it's fine if you are, I just…" Rachel stopped, still clearly thinking of how to address the situation.

"No, I'm not transgender. I have the double x genes; I've had more than enough blood tests to figure that out." She said quietly, choosing her explanation carefully. "It's run in the family, that's all I know. I have a uterus, but it doesn't function; a million tests for that too. However, the outer… equipment all works." She wanted to brush back her hair, a nervous habit, but right now she was clinging to Rachel for dear life. "You could get pregnant if we were to have sex."

"But why do you have it?" Rachel still looked confused, and she couldn't blame the shorter girl. She would be just as puzzled.

"I don't know. I was never able to trace my genealogy to see why this happened. I just want to be honest with you about this." Quinn felt Rachel let go of her hand, and brush away her tears. She looked up at the big pools of cocoa and smiled softly, seeing Rachel smile back.

"You had no reason to worry." Rachel whispered, kissing her softly, pulling the pillow off her lap as she did so. She realized how cold she was, and Rachel's touch was exhilarating on her chilled skin. "I don't care what you have Quinn, I love you for you. I love that you're so gentle and so tender whenever we do the small things, and I have every trust in you that you won't hurt me when we do have sex."

Rachel kissed her again, hands running over her arms, and pushing her back. Quinn hit the pillow on the bed, Rachel still on top of her. "I don't care what's in your pants. I just want you. I want your silk touch, and your loving personality." She felt Rachel's fingers play with the edges of her bra, a burst of heat coming from her chest. She didn't want their first time to be when she was sick, this wasn't _Friends_.

"I would love to make love to you now, but I'm still sick Rach." She panted, her heart racing, looking up at her girlfriend, who was brushed her matted hair away from her face once again. "I'm just… thank you." She pushed a lock of dark hair behind Rachel's ear, her smile trembling. "Thank you for being accepting. I don't think I could thank you enough."

"You're my girlfriend, and I love you." Rachel fell onto Quinn, the blonde enjoying her girlfriend's presence. She smiled as Rachel's arms looped around her neck, and a soft kiss was put on her cheek. "I would never stop loving for something as trivial as an outer appearance. So we have to use birth control, so what?" Rachel sighed as she got comfortable atop of Quinn, "All things considered, this might be a good thing."

"And why is that?" Quinn looked at her, noticing the blank TV screen for the first time. She ran a hand through Rachel's hair, realizing the Tylenol had gotten rid of her muscle pains.

"Because we'll be able to have children without the use of a third party, which will be much easier than going through adoption channels or sperm banks." Rachel yawned, and Quinn titled her head up, looking at the slightly disgruntled face. She smiled as Rachel grunted in discontent at the position before Quinn gave her a small kiss.

"You're already thinking about children? Can I assume you have our wedding party planned as well?" Quinn smiled, running a hand through Rachel's hair, feeling another surge of heat going through her lower half at the thought of Rachel in a skin-tight white dress, and felt her hardening member press against her underwear. Rachel shifted on top of her, feeling it as well, before climbing off Quinn lower half.

"I don't know why, but I feel I should ask this. How big are you?" Rachel put her head on the pillow, looking at Quinn, who in turn, was looking up at the spackled ceiling.

"8 inches." She smiled, looking at Rachel's impressed face. "You seem shocked, should I be worried now?"

"No no, I just had no clue you were so…. Well endowed." Rachel's fingers laced with hers, and she noticed how they were still lying on top of the blankets. Rachel had changed from the jeans from before to a pair of pajama shorts and one of her concert tees. Yes, it was always lovely seeing her girlfriend in her tops. "I don't know how I should feel now. I would figure I would be able to … arouse you at some points, but I never saw or felt any signs of movement."

"It's because I tuck most days." She sighed again, sitting up to pull the blankets over her bare legs and torso. "It's painful sometimes, especially when I see you, but if I can't find a pair of baggy jeans, it's my best bet. I don't see another foolproof plan. It's always been a secret that I've tried to keep hidden."

"I understand." Rachel said solemnly, and sat up quickly, Quinn looking at her. "I'm going to go put on the alarm, and then we can go to sleep, or watch a movie or something. Whatever you want to do, it's already 9."

"Wow… I didn't realize how fast the time flies." She nodded, watching Rachel leave the room, and smiling at the rushed footsteps down and up the stairs. The brunette certainly was in a hurry to come back to bed, and relax.

Quinn closed her eyes, thinking about how easily Rachel had taken everything, and how horrible she felt for thinking the brunette would act otherwise. She felt her forehead burn, closing her eyes to the light of the TV that Rachel clicked on. The bedroom door closed, and she jumped into the air a bit as Rachel slammed onto the bed beside her.

"What do you mean that you've tried to keep hidden? Did something happen that it came out?" Rachel's head leaned on her chest, on her breasts specifically, and Quinn winced a bit before Rachel put a pillow between them. "Sorry."

"Don't worry…" Quinn tried to put the words into a sentence as she thought about the one specifically painful experience, the first one where she really had pain associated with her secret. "I was in elementary school, I don't even remember where, and it was Halloween and I was a vampire. This bitch in my class exposed me, and I just remember getting kicked in the balls three times by these idiots before I broke someone's nose and ran home." She heard Rachel's sniffling behind the noise of the TV, and opened her eyes to see Rachel's bloodshot ones.

"Quinn… I'm sorry…" She pulled her girlfriend tight embrace, feeling Rachel's tears run onto her neck.

"Why are you apologizing, it's not your fault. You weren't there." Quinn stroked the dark strands, holding Rachel tightly as she let everything out.

"But… you… you would never… ever… do anything to deserve… that…" She could feel Rachel getting heavy in her arms, tired from the events of the day, and she kissed Rachel's forehead softly.

"Go to sleep Rach, everything will be better in the morning, I promise." She felt the tears still roll down her neck and onto her chest as Rachel cried. She heard the brunette' breathing even out, and her arm pinned beneath the girl as she fell asleep.

Quinn looked at her, the fresh tears gleaming on her face. Her tan skin was tinged red from the crying, and Quinn wanted to weep from causing Rachel so much hurt. She hugged the girl tighter, picking up the remote as she flipped the channels. She leaned over, grabbing her cell phone, remembering how much her other friend was hurting now.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

_Quinn sits on a chair in her kitchen, looking at the small cupcake she bought for herself at the bakery beside her school. She doesn't have a candle to put in it; her eleventh birthday isn't much to celebrate. She's still alive, still getting hurt, still haven't herself bleed for days on end. She puts her hands on the table, looking at the time on the clock. _

_It's almost midnight, and her parents have been at a party all day. She turns 11 in a few minutes; she can wait that long until eating her cake. She was born so close to midnight, on April 15. That was the day her life was condemned. She swallows, looking at the little cupcake with the blue icing, without a candle. This is her birthday treat. She's sitting in such a big kitchen, but there are locks on the cupboards, and a key to the fridge. She knows her parents want her to be a gymnastics star, be on the Olympics or something, but she doesn't want to._

_She goes into her backpack, and pulls out her Grandpa's old pencil case. She wants to be an artist, something where she could draw all day long and no one would question it. She took a pen and started drawing little hearts on her arms. She almost had a friend today, almost. But then she realized that he was just trying to kiss her, because she was the weird girl who would kiss anybody. _

_She looks up at the clock again, watching the minutes tick by, thinking about how much she doesn't want to go to school tomorrow. She's going to be the weird one, the quiet one. She doesn't want to think about the names she was called before. 'Freak' 'Disgusting' 'He-She' she wasn't any of those things, but everyone calls her that. _

_At least tonight, Father won't be here to hurt her. Tonight, her birthday will be good for that reason. She looks at the simple clock, no designs, nothing. Mother thinks that will clash with the rest of her kitchen._

_She fiddles with the pen in her hands, drawing a few loops and swirls on her arms. She likes gothic stuff, blacks and layers. She hates pink, and that's all Father wants her to wear. Even Mother is beginning to agree with him. Mother isn't on her side anymore, she just listens to Father. _

_When she was younger, Mother would help her with her cuts, with the gashes Father did to her. Now they don't even look at each other. Quinn can't reach some parts on her back with the cream, but Mother just ignores her now. She's nothing to her parents. _

_Maybe if she had family around this wouldn't be so bad. She doesn't know her family, she remembers a few cousins from when she was little, and playing around at her Grandpa's house, but that's it. She hasn't seen anyone since she left Maine. Father doesn't want her too. He wants her to be alone, to be locked away and hidden because she's a disgrace._

_That's one thing Quinn had never been able to figure out. She's going to turn 11 in just a few minutes. Father and Mother saw her when she was born, they knew what she was a few hours later, and they didn't want to give her away. If Father was going to treat her like this, she should've been put up for adoption. She rubs her eyes, thinking about what it would be like to have a real family, with cousins to play with and without a pain in her backside every time she sat down._

_It just makes sense to her. If Father was going to treat her like his slave, she should've been given to a different family. Anything could be better than this. Sitting in the kitchen, Quinn moves around a bit, trying to find a comfortable position. It really does hurt to sit down, and her back is stinging from the lashes given by Father. She stands up, elbows still on the kitchen table. _

_She waits for the clock to chime. _

_She has on her favourite shirt, her only black one, and a party hat that she bought at the dollar store. In front of her is a small sparkler, which she doesn't know how to light. She could've gotten in trouble all for nothing if she got caught stealing it. She sighs, picking it up and putting the end in her mouth like a cigarette. She pretends to take a puff and exhales air as the clock dings. She looks at Cinderella, sitting on the table beside the cupcake, leaning against her textbooks. _

"_It's my birthday Cinderella. I'm 11 now. I'm going to be double digits for the next 89 years. I'll be special if I hit 100, triple digits then…" She takes another imaginary puff of the sparkler, wanting to blow out a candle, but left without matches. She sticks her finger in the frosting on the cupcake, and etches 11 into it. She licks the sugar from her finger, and feels small tears run down her cheeks. This is what she deserves, loneliness, solitude…_

_Maybe she doesn't deserve to have friends; maybe she's just been so bad that she doesn't deserve what she wants. "Maybe this year, I can get a friend. Maybe this year, someone will love me." She whispers, taking a bite of the chocolate cupcake, the frosting spread all across her mouth. "What do you think Cinderella?" _

_She looks at the doll, desperate for a human voice to talk to, but she doesn't get a response. She smiles softly, patting the dolls head. "It's ok, you don't have to answer. You're already nicer to me than everyone else. At least you keep me company."_

_Silently, she eats the cupcake, sticking her head under the faucet for a drink of water and takes the doll, going upstairs to bed. She doesn't both putting on pajamas, just untying her ponytail before she takes her pillow, stuffing her bed. If Father comes in later and sees it's not her, he might be too tired to look for her. It's happened before. She makes it look like she's lying in bed, complete with the Barbie Doll hair sticking out from under the covers. She takes her favourite Disney pillow and Cinderella, opening the door to the closet and looking at the huge pile of laundry that she really should start._

_She boroughs her way into the heart of the pile, closing the closet door and leaving her with nothing but black. Fumbling around, she finds her old flashlight, clicking it on while she arranges the pillow in the clothes. She covers herself with an old dress and blouse, making sure she's curled in a ball so tightly that he would never expect her to be hidden. _

_She closes her eyes, shutting off the flashlight and clinging to Cinderella. It really hurts curled in a ball this tightly, but it's less pain than if she were in bed. She smells the vintage smell of the dress, the floral perfume from the shops still on them, and she clings to Cinderella, still scared a bit of the pure darkness. She doesn't want to open her eyes, too afraid that she'll get really scared of the pitch black she meet. She's afraid of spiders too, and she's scared that one might come and bite her, but it's still less pain then being in bed._

_The garage door opens; she can hear it, and her heart races. She feels herself go limp; almost asleep as she hears her parents stumble in, both clearly drunk. That never stops him though; it just makes it worse for her. She hears her bedroom door open, swing open, and he grunts as he pulls off the covers. She doesn't breathe as she hears his mad growl._

"_You little shit." She hears him growl, her head feeling so light from not breathing. Her door closes again, and she hears his clunky footsteps going down the stairs again._

_Tonight, she can breathe. Happy birthday to her. _

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Brittany tossed herself on the bed, too tired to really do anything. Quinn must've been throwing up in the bathroom for Rachel to ask her to leave, but she understood that. Whenever she was sick, she wanted to be left alone. It felt good to vent for a few hours though; everything was crashing down around her.

She rolled over, looking at the clock. She couldn't believe how late it was, and where was her cat? Lord Tubbington hadn't been around for a while. She pushed herself off the bed, and went in search of her cat, cell phone in hand. Her mom was already asleep and her dad was downstairs watching the end of a hockey game, probably asleep as well. She tiptoed down the stairs, quietly calling to her cat.

"Lord Tubbington, come here. I have catnip." She knew it was bad to taunt her cat, but she just wanted him now. She needed something to hug. "You can watch whatever you want on TV."

She heard a small meow coming from the kitchen, and went in, seeing the cat curled on top of the vent, rolling her eyes at him. She picked up the mound of fur, hugging him tightly as he purred. "Why have you been avoiding me Lord Tubbington? I really have to talk to you about something. Too bad you don't do relationship advice."

Brittany's cell phone buzzed, and she got a little startled. She looked at the bright screen, smiling when she saw Quinn's name on the message.

"_Hey Britt, sorry about being locked in the bathroom, I wasn't feeling to well. Are you still willing to talk?" _Brittany shook her head at Quinn. Of course she was still willing to talk; she had nothing else to do this late at night. It's not like she could bug her brother into playing a game with her anymore.

"_Don't apologize. When I'm sick I hate people too. Yeah, I could use some advice with some things. Rachel was just listening to me as I vented. I don't think I asked for her advice. How is she?"_ Brittany watched as the cat hurried up the stairs and into her bedroom, and she smiled at the brown furball.

Quietly, Brittany went down to the basement, seeing the hockey game play out on the TV, but she didn't know the teams. Her father was asleep on the couch, as usual. She had come down just to say goodnight, but she watched as the players on the ice ran around, and got caught up in the hustle. She sat on the carpeted floor, looking at the TV while leaning against the couch.

She never really spent too much time with her dad anymore; he worked a lot and had weird hours. She listened as he snored a bit, and she watched the game before feeling her phone buzz in her hand.

"_Rachel's asleep; I'm just watching whatever's on. I think there's a hockey game tonight, but I'm not sure. So what happened with you and the bitch?"_ Brittany laughed softly at Santana's new title, typing back quickly, looking back at the screen as she heard a cheer.

"_There is a game, I'm watching it, but I don't know who's playing. Someone just got a score. Anyways, Santana invited me over to her house, and when I got there, Puck was there too, and he told me San didn't want to date me. He wasn't mean or anything; really he seemed a bit sad as he talked to me." _Brittany put down her phone, watching the bright screen as her dad continued to snore behind her. These teams must be really good, neither had many points yet.

A soft meow came down the stairs, and Brittany looked to see Lord Tubbington on the steps, looking impatient. She patted the floor beside her, and the car came over, stretching a bit before finally sitting down. "So those penguin people are playing the devils. I don't know who's winning, I think the penguins." Brittany whispered to the cat, "Those pictures on their uniforms mean the teams, right?"

Her phone buzzed again, and she picked it up. _"Hey Britt Britt." _She rolled her eyes at Santana's text, and deleted the entire conversation, spanning the past 2 days. She didn't want to talk to San right now. Again, it vibrated, and she looked at the glowing screen.

"_Ughhhhh, Britt can I please kill her now? She's a total bitch, having Puck do her dirty work. He's not much better, total dickhead really. But I'm biased. They did try to kill me after all…_" Brittany nodded, remembering seeing Quinn all beat up after that incident.

"_Rachel would kill me if I let you do that. She doesn't want you in prison. Besides, I'm just going to stop talking to her. She's…. she doesn't like me anymore. She's using me, I know that… but I just think that she'll realized what she's doing" _Brittany tried to focus on the game in front of her, thoughts of Santana's words running around her head. She grabbed her phone, and rapid-fired another text to Quinn _"She kissed me a few days ago_"

It was quiet in the room, just the quiet shouts from the TV, and her dad's snoring. She scratched Lord Tubbington between the ears, hearing a soft purr coming from the cat as well, and she wanted to hug him. "Well go to sleep after this game, ok Lord Tubbington?" He meowed in response.

"_You didn't tell me this! Why would she do that?" _ Quinn sounded confused, and Brittany shrugged before realizing Quinn couldn't see her.

"_I don't know, she did it at the movies when I saw Rachel. We were in the theatre, and she pulled me close to her and kissed me quickly. I didn't know what to do, she just did it." _ Brittany pressed her hand against her forehead, thinking about meeting Puck in Santana's driveway. _"And then she and Puck did it tonight"_

"_What a fucking bitch" _Quinn's response was fast. _"Britt, you need to break up with her for good. Don't let her back into your life if she's going to continue to toy with you. You are too good to let your heart get ripped out_"

Brittany smiled at Quinn's response, nodding as she read through it again. She quickly typed up a response before deciding to go fall asleep as well. _"Thanks Q, I just… I don't know. I want to be done with her, but I don't want to end whatever possibilities we have. I just want her to like me back. I'm going to bed now, I'm tired. TTYL, goodnight._"

She shut off her phone and the TV, picked up her cat, and made her way back up the stairs from the darkened basement before setting Lord Tubbington back on the floor. "Time for bed, do you want to sleep with me tonight?"

The cat wound its way around her legs, meowing, and she smiled. "At least you love me Lord Tubbington. I know Santana doesn't." She leaned down, scratching behind its ears and eliciting a meow from him as well.

* * *

**Flashback: Quinn's 11th birthday. Nothing big happens.**


	15. Tangled In The Great Escape

**Hello my lovelies! So good to see you all after such a long wait. Apologies for the time again, I've been working at this for a while. Tweaking and nit-picking everything. Hopefully there aren't too many mistakes, but if there are... well, my bad. All I can say.**

**So thank you all who reviewed! and thanks to the followers and favouriters of this story, you all seriously rock! :)**

**In this chapter, there's triggers. The ball is motion basically, and everything is going to happen now. I apologize for any mistakes with the legal system and the hospital system. The extent of my knowledge about them is TV. So, there are triggers for Quinn, she has to revisit everything in her past, and see her demons again. Mentions of abuse is the extent.**

**I also had to re-edit the first draft of my plot, so it's revised, and back on track. Hopefully everything won't take long, but schoolwork piles up so easily, and balancing my other stories. I'm determined to finish this one though! **

**So until I update again, hopefully everyone has a wonderful week!**

* * *

Quinn balled her hands nervously, sitting on the very edge of Rachel's bed as the brunette slept. The Berry men hadn't been home in three days, a business trip apparently, and life had gone on somewhat normally, except for the fact that she was camping out here, afraid to go back to her little nook under the driveway. She could hear Rachel's dads from up here, and her stomach was in knots, thinking about what she would say to them.

Exhaling loudly, she attempted to whisper everything that had ever happened to her, but every word was stammered and every action was hidden beneath trembling. This wasn't supposed to happen this way; she was supposed to be strong enough to take this by herself.

She took the pillow and held it tightly, trying to sit up as she grasped it. There was such a large weight off her shoulders, the fact that Rachel understood her, and still loved her. Now she really had to get past Rachel's dads.

It was a deciding factor really. She had never trusted adults in her life, she never respected them; the only emotions she ever felt towards an adult were fear and shame. Cracking her knuckles, she tried to think of something that would calm her down. She stood up, feeling a sweat start, and picked up Rachel's iPod, which at some point had become their joint one.

Sitting on the floor next to Rachel's sleeping form, she sighed, music filling her head with emotions. She shook out her hair, feeling around her mouth for the missing snake bites. She never had told Rachel what they were for; how she had gotten them once to spite her mother and just piss him off. How they were infected for weeks because he had made them. She didn't know what she was thinking then, but she was over harbouring all those feelings.

Revenge was on her mind, but justice more. She wanted to see him rotting in prison as someone's bitch. She ran her hands over the markings on her fingers, thinking about what she would do with all the cuts in the future, how to conceal them then. She took a pen from Rachel's dresser, writing love on her knuckles in script.

"Quinn…" Rachel slurred, and Quinn turned her head, slipping her inked hand into Rachel's.

"I'm here baby." Quinn murmured, turning around to see Rachel's little smile. "You can still sleep a bit."

"Mmkay, are my dads home?" She sighed, pulling Quinn closer.

"Yeah sweetie, they're just downstairs." Quinn stood up, pulling herself closer to the slumbering brunette. "I'll go get you a drink, give me a kiss." Rachel's sweet lips were against hers, the taste making her sad smile wider.

She let go. This was something that she had to do by herself; this was the test of her strength, how well she could compose herself under scrutiny and pressure. Rachel would just break down, which would make her cry a little harder. She crossed the dimly lit room, opening the door, looking back at Rachel's calm position; the sadness painted her face as she shut the door, sucking in her breath harshly as she went down the stairs.

The steps creaked as she tiptoed down them, gripping the railing so tightly that her knuckles were turning white. The tile was cool under her bare feet as she got to the main floor, and she listened for the voices of the Berry men in just the room over.

Her hands trembled as she walked, her voice stuttered as she mumbled her practice. The light of the sun coming from the kitchen's bay window nearly blinded her as she stepped into the warm room.

"Mr. Berry, Mr. Berry, c-can I talk to you about something?"

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Rachel grunted as she turned in her bed, her body getting tangled in the sheets. She rubbed her eyes, blinking at the dull lights filtering through her blinds, sitting up fully. Her room was so silent, not a sound coming from the bathroom; the only noise was her shallow breathing. The bathroom door was slightly ajar, and upon seeing it, Rachel willed herself out of bed.

The bathroom was empty; the tile was chilling her socks. Quinn had promised that she wouldn't leave last night, but this was worrying her. A small voice in her was urging her to check the closet; she crossed her room slowly, pulling open her closet door to see nothing out of place, everything in perfect assimilation. Quinn hadn't touched anything.

"Where are you?" She whispered softly, her hand balling the shirt she was wearing. The fabric was uncomfortable in her clammy palm, but she didn't remove it.

She sat back on her bed, hearing the steps up the stairs, most likely one of her dads to come and wake her up for breakfast. Gazing at the white wooden door, she smiled brightly when Quinn entered her room, the blonde's face splotchy and red. Tears were wet on her cheeks, and she froze when she saw that Rachel was awake.

"Baby what's wrong?" Rachel nearly jumped over the bed, right into Quinn's arms. She pressed her tightly in a hug, drawing in breath quickly. She felt Quinn grasping her, like the blonde never wanted to let go, and more tears wet the crown of her head. She didn't know what to do but hold her weeping girlfriend, allowing Quinn to get the support she clearly needed. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Y-your dads… T-they're taking me to a cop station." Quinn pushed her away, clearly feeling the need to make eye contact when she delivered the news. "I-I have to talk to t-them… a-about everything."

"In regards to your father?" Rachel gripped Quinn's hands tightly, watching as the taller girl tried to compose herself, blinking harshly against the tears that were falling. Quinn nodded, hyperventilating horribly, her breath coming out in shallow stammers.

"I-I n-need help." Rachel wiped the tears spilling down Quinn's cheeks, and now from her own, holding her tightly. "I-I can't do this… n-not b-by myself…. N-not anymore…" Rachel rubbed small circles on her back, knowing fully that it was a soothing motion for the blonde. She tried speaking, but could only really manage a faint whisper.

"I'm so proud of you," She pulled Quinn down to her level, whispering the words into her ear, feeling Quinn's body tremble under her touch. She honestly didn't know how many times Quinn had heard those words directed at her, but she was determined to make the blonde feel appreciated, reassured, _loved_. "I am so, so proud of you. Understand?" Quinn nodded, her head burrowing deeper into Rachel's shoulder. "You were strong enough to ask for help, for the help that we both know I can't give you. You deserve to be helped Quinn, you deserve to be given a chance at the world."

"R-rach" Quinn tried to talk, but the words couldn't get out.

"Don't speak Quinn." Rachel grasped Quinn's jittering hand. "I'm going to come with you, and I'll be beside you as much as I can. I'll just toss a coat over my pajamas, just don't say anything yet. Please…"

Quinn nodded; watching as Rachel ran gathered her jacket, sliding her soft hand into the twitching one. She noticed how her breathing had become almost normal, her heart still racing. Holding tightly to Rachel's hand, she waited for the little one to lead her down the stairs before realizing Rachel was waiting for her. Slowly, she stepped out of the dark, cool bedroom and into the brightly lit hall. She didn't care she was still in sleepwear, her hair disheveled, her eyes dirty from unwashed makeup; she just wanted to go to the cops, to say something.

"Ready to go?" Quinn nodded to the taller of Rachel's dads, surprised at how fast the men could put together a bag in case this ran long. She rubbed her arm nervously with her free hand, looking up at the two silently. These men, these two beings, knew what she had gone through, and they were unbiased. They just wanted her to get help, get the mercy she deserved. Everything Father had fed to her was a lie, every damn word that came out of his chest was a fabricated tale.

"I'm sorry for this." She whispered, sliding into the cold converse, noticing a hole that was forming on the toe. Rachel slid the leather jacket around her shoulders, and a part of her felt like this was the end. As though they were delivering her to a hospital, getting ready for her to die; yet this was the beginning, the start of what probably would be a long legal trial, the start of an open relationship between her and her girlfriend, the beginning of the better half of her life.

"Don't apologize Quinn, let's just get you there and find someone for you to speak to about Russell." Hiram was very no-nonsense about this, and behind the seemingly placid exterior, she could see fire burning in his eyes. She nodded, feeling another hand on her back, turning to look at Leroy Berry as she exited the house.

"It's not your fault Quinn, we'll be sure you get help for whatever he did to you." Leroy was clearly trying to hide emotions, but she could see the redness on his face and the tears in his eyes. She nodded again, gripping Rachel as they heading into the back of the little car. She didn't even bother to put on her seatbelt; she just fell into fetal position, her head lying in Rachel's lap, facing the brunette's midsection. She listened as the car rumbled to life, and the other three passengers spoke silently. All she could process now was that this was really happening.

Her dream, to lock him in prison, to see him wither away with disease, it might come true. She shuddered, moving her head closer to Rachel as the brunette stroked her hair softly. Maybe this could work out.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

The chair she was in was unnervingly chilling; the hairs on the back of her neck stood up and she started fiddling with her spacers, something she really hadn't done in a long while. She wished she had a pen to doodle with, looking at the words on her knuckles from the morning. Her stomach rumbled for the first time all morning, and with a slow creak, the door opened, a tall detective coming into the room with a large folder.

"Quinn Fabray correct?" She nodded to the detective's questions. He seemed nice enough, if a bit young. "You've got a lot of history, don't you?" She nodded again, folding her hands in her lap. She bit her lip nervously, realizing she was still in pajamas, now a little embarrassed. "Would you prefer me to read your file, or would you like to explain it yourself?"

"You should probably read it, I don't remember all the places we moved to." She murmured, the detective nodding, laying the folder out on the metal table in front of her. Everything was there; doctor's charts, medical history, her school file, everything recorded aspect about her life was there.

"My name is Detective Arnold Jensen, you can call me whatever you'd like. I'm in charge of your case." The built black man stuck out his hand, and she slowly shook it. "Now, from what it says in your file, there's scarring on you back and arms. I haven't seen anything written down about anywhere else. In here it says, well… you're different aren't you?"

"I have the genetic structure of a female, but clearly you know about what else I have…" she motioned to her medical chart, and he nodded, spreading the much thicker stack of files out on the table. She swept across the charts, the years of doctor's visits, remembering how her grandparents had fought hard with her parents for her not to get reassignment surgery.

"I don't think the courts would have a problem with that, but your medical history shows that when you were about 7 you had gonorrhea… I can only assume how you received it, and I know you probably won't want to discuss this, but Quinn, I need you to tell me what happened." He finally took a seat across the table from her, and she looks at some of the old school files, seeing her old pictures. The smiling blonde kid was such a front for what was going on underneath. "I can have you talk with a therapist now, if you prefer."

"Can I get a therapist after all this?" She looked at him, unaware of how hunched over she was.

"Of course, it's up to you how we proceed with this." He leaned his elbows on the table, studying the files on the metal surface.

"Russell moved us around a lot when I was younger; he did it so he would never get caught." Quinn locked eyes with him, realizing she had his attention. "I think he was always afraid of getting caught. He had friends everywhere who would help him… he has money, I don't know why he's so worried."

"What exactly did he do to you?" Detective Jensen didn't move as she sighed, taking off her jacket and placed her hands bare on the table.

"He did this to my hands," She whispered, looking at the small red lines etched on her fingers. "and on my arms, he would hit me with a belt." She shifted in her seat, pulling one arm over her head so he could see all the markings. "It's worse on my back and legs. After dinner, every night, until I was about 8, he would whip me with his belt… because I was horrible and grotesque and dirty… That's what he called me." She fought back the tears, sucking in her breath as she looked at the Detective. "He would smoke at his desk… and all the ash would go into the cuts on my back."

"What else did he do to you?" He asked her in a calm voice, and she knew this was being filmed. It was all evidence, against him.

"After I turned 8… he raped me… almost every night." She balled her hands, shaking furiously. "He… he did it anally, and I probably have enough scars to prove it. He made me do things to him… Horrific things… I would try to fight it so much, but that would just get me hit harder. He would throw me like a doll across rooms, into doors, into walls. He hit me on the head with a lamp more than a few times."

"How long did this happen for, Quinn?" Jensen was motioning to his partners beside the glass, she knew it. She was finally getting help.

"Until a few nights ago." She felt the tears spill freely, but her breathing was somewhat calm. "He bought me an apartment under one of his friends, but I don't know their name. He comes… too often; typically late when I'm asleep and he'll… he'll… rape me. I've been sleeping at my girlfriend's house the past few nights, and I know it's just made him angrier. He wants to control me, and he hates it when I disappear. He hates me so much, but he wants me all to himself anyways."

Jensen nodded, standing fully and lost in thought. "Quinn, after we're done here, you're going to see a doctor. We'll take you to the hospital, and you can bring someone if it'll make you feel better. The faster we get this processed, the quicker when can lock up this rat bastard, understand? After the hospital visit, I can set you up with a therapist. There will also be a CPA agent there, just to ask you questions, if you have any family around here, other than your parents."

"Y-you'll do that?" Quinn looked up at him, trembling as he helped her out of the chair. "You don't have to do all that… I just don't want him to hurt me anymore."

"Believe me, after this is done, he'll be locked up until his dying day." Jensen led her out of the interrogation room, his apparent team going in and collecting her files. "Who came with you here?"

"M-my girlfriend and he parents. She convinced me to come here… She's probably worried sick…" Quinn looked at him as he chuckled softly.

"Sounds like she loves you very much."

"I love her a lot too…"

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"_Russell, you son of a bitch, do you know how much I've called you?"_

"_What the hell do you want Barry?"_

"_Your kid, guess where she turned up."_

"_How the fuck would I know, at the bottom of a river?"_

"_She's at the station Russell, I warned you about this. You should never have given her so much freedom. What the hell do you think she's doing here, baking cookies?"_

"…"

"_Russell, answer me you asshole! You need to get the fuck out of town before the cops show up to your place. The kid just went in with one of the top notches in the precinct. If he gets a whiff of your whereabouts, you're a dead man."_

"_What the hell do you expect me to do now?!"_

"_Go to my place, bring Judy. Tell Myrna that you need to borrow her car and take it as far as you can. Ditch it at a train station or something and you and Judy run. Got it?"_

"_With what money idiot? Where the hell do you expect me to get money to get a train?"_

"_Tell Myrna to give you the money in the cookie jar, she'll know what it's for. Understand me? You're a dead man if you come back here."_

"_Yeah yeah, I've been told that a few too many times." _

"_So what are you doing now?"_

"_I'm going to go find the lush and get the fuck out of Ohio." _

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Quinn squeezed Rachel's hand tightly, sitting with her knees to her chest in the thin hospital gown. She didn't tell Rachel that she had to get the rape kit done while she was here; the little brunette thought it was only to treat the scars and bruises. She knew she could probably get the rape kit done without much of an external hassle; she had been conditioned so much that she never questioned much when it came to authority, just did it.

Internally, she was a wreck. Her insides were clawing to get out, she was so nauseous. She hadn't opened her mouth from the drive over here, even when the Detective was trying to get her to say something. The reality was finally setting in, and she wasn't all that keen on it.

"R-Rach…" she barely got the words out before Rachel shoved a bowl into her lap and she vomited into it. She hadn't had any breakfast, no energy bars, just a bit of water. Her abdomen ached with tension, and she dumped the contents of the bowl into the garbage beside her, dropping the plastic appliance on the floor.

"It's ok Quinn, you can relax now. They've gone to arrest your father. They said they're taking your mother in for questioning too." Rachel rubbed small circles on her back softly, as she pulled her knees back to her chest. "Aren't you uncomfortable like that?"

"I-I'm fine…" She stuttered, both girls looking up at the doctor that had entered the room. Quinn felt a small whimper burble from inside her, but she didn't say anything, nodding at the doctor.

"I'm Doctor Allen, I assume you've been told about me?" The tall, redheaded woman pulled a stool beside Quinn, and she nodded, remembering how Jensen was telling her about the set of doctors who typically tackled these cases.

"Y-yea, I know who you are." Quinn let go of Rachel's hand, wondering if she should have Rachel leave. Yes, the brunette loved her, but this was a lot to take in. She ran her hand through her hair nervously, "You need a-a full examination, r-right?"

The Doctor sighed, nodding. "If you would like, I can give you a few minutes to yourself, but I suggest that we complete the rape kit as soon as possible. From what the detective has told me, I don't expect to find DNA residue, but the suggested scarring is evidence enough." Hearing a squeak coming from the smallest person in the room, both turned at looked at Rachel, all color drained from her face. "You can stay, if you wish."

Quinn gripped Rachel's hand again, turning to her girlfriend, an ashamed look on her face. "Rach, you don't have to stay through this…" She watched as Rachel sucked in her breath, gripping Quinn's hand tightly with both of hers. For a moment, a split second, Quinn thought Rachel was about to walk right out the door and never look back, but as Rachel opened her stained eyes, there was a look of determination on her face.

"I'm here, with you, for you. I will be beside you every damn step." Rachel kissed Quinn's hand lightly. "Nothing you say to me will ever change that."

Nodding, Quinn smiled softly, her breath leaving as she tried to keep the tears back. She turned to the Doctor, nodding her head slowly as well. "I-I'm ready when you are."

"Where would you like to start?" Doctor Allen waited as Quinn pulled off the hospital gown, her knees still up to her chest in a bra and a pair of boxers. She slid over on the table, turning her back to Dr. Allen, revealing the full extent of her scars. The red lines criss-crossed over her back like a broken window with no particular pattern. She climbed slowly off the table, dropping her boxers around her ankles, her back still to the Doctor.

The air conditioning in the room was giving her goosebumps, and she listened carefully for a gasp that didn't come. She covered her front as best as she could with one hand, standing as the doctor recorded the scars on her back and thighs.

"Where else are you scarred?" Dr. Allen spoke, breaking the deafening silence in the room. Quinn was quite surprised that she was given this much freedom; that it wasn't just an invasive exam to see how fucked up she was. Instead of speaking, her stomach still in knots, she faced the Doctor, showing the smaller collection of scars on her arms and knuckles, still covering her privates.

"They're from a belt..." her small voice echoed in the enclosed room. "He would make me lie on his desk and he would beat me. I-I tried to fight him… but then he would hit harder. He once took the belt to my… my penis. Can I please keep that covered?"

"Of course, I'm just recording where the scars are right now." Dr. Allen wrote down more areas as Quinn pulled up her boxers, cracking her knuckles in the cold room. "Would you like to proceed with the rape kit next, or the cat-scan next?"

Quinn looked from the Doctor to Rachel, the brunette trying to be stoic, although she could see the waves of emotion behind her glazed eyes. "Which would take longer?"

"Well that depends on how willing you would be to complete the kit. In the best case scenario, the kit would take quicker than the scan, but it depends how allowing you are." Quinn stared at Dr. Allen as she explained what exactly she had to do, and how long both were expected to take. She hoisted herself back on the exam table, pulling off her boxers and gnashing her teeth.

"Let's just get this over with please." She pressed the flat of her palm against her closed eyes, biting her lip harshly as she listened to the Doctor's quiet voice, explaining everything that was happening, and where it would be sent after the appointment. She gripped Rachel's hand so tightly she was afraid she might break it. She felt herself hyperventilating, but she also heard herself urging the Doctor to continue. The faster this happened, the faster it could be done with.

"It's okay." Rachel's voice whispered in her ear, and her eyes opened slowly, seeing the black of her palm. "You're doing such a good job, you're so brave." The similar rubbing was on her back, pulling her out of the darkness that was coming after her. She wasn't in a basement, or in a closet; she was in a hospital, getting the evidence to put away an evil man. "You are doing wonderful, Quinn."

"Keep talking." She mumbled so low that she couldn't hear it herself, but Rachel clearly had. The soft voice continued on, giving her encouragement and solidarity. She could still feel Dr. Allen conducting the kit, but she focused on the soft words coming from Rachel. She wanted to curl into a ball and rock herself to sleep, but that wasn't happening anytime soon.

Some time later, or at least feeling as such, Dr. Allen spoke up. "I got whatever I could, and there is definite scarring, quite extensive as well. How long were you subject to his control?"

"Since I was 8." Quinn whispered, shaking like a leaf as she sat up, now grabbing onto Rachel, unwilling to let go of the smaller girl.

"It's extensive scarring. The CAT scan should show if there was any damage to your colon, but I don't think it went that far. I sincerely hope not." The Doctor grimaced, pulling off the latex gloves, helping Quinn off the table, and handing her a small cup.

"Is this for an STD test?" Quinn looked at it, one arm around Rachel's shoulder, leaning on the brunette.

"It's best to cover all the bases when working cases like these." Dr. Allen pointed her towards the bathroom. "I'll give these samples to the Detective, he'll take them to the crime lab, and then we'll get results. I'll be right here, so when you're done, I'll take the sample to our lab, and we'll take you up for the CAT scan."

"Ok… Thanks Doc."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"_She's a very quiet patient, but she was shaking a great deal while I conducted the rape kit."_

"_Where is she now exactly?"_

"_In the bathroom giving me a urine sample. I can have a blood test drawn if you'd like."_

"_Do that before the CAT scan, and send it to the lap ASAP. These results need to come in, because every second I'm here watching her, her father is getting further away from us."_

"_You haven't sent out any of your team to look for him?"_

"_I have, but they said the house is empty. Car's in the driveway, all clothing and jewelry is still there, but no people. Russell clearly got an informant. I need Quinn to give me the address of where she lived before this; Russell's 'friend' is probably who tipped him off." _

"_She's so quiet… you better put this sicko in prison for a long, long time Arnie, because if you don't, I'll skin him with my bare hands." _

"_I feel that myself Irene… what did the findings tell you?" _

"_Well you have to check for DNA, but there's scarring… major scarring. I want the scan to focus on her head and her lower half. My biggest worry is that he penetrated her colon, and that's problematic for both of them. Although, she would've felt tearing in that area if the colon was ruptured."_

"_Fuck… Alright. I'm going to keep one of my team members here, just to keep an eye on things. I'll bring this to the crime lab and come right back."_

"_Do you think he'll try and find her?"_

"_Yeah… and I think he'll succeed. It's my job to keep her away from him, because Russell will kill her if they meet again. He won't hesitate that… She's a good kid, keep an eye on her."_

"_I will."_

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"Why can't I just stay at Rachel's house? I've been living there on and off for a few months now." Quinn got into a pair of jeans and a plain black polo shirt that Jensen had brought back for her. They were sitting in what appeared to be a therapist's room, Rachel still beside her, eating some sort of vegan yogurt.

"We need to grant temporary custody to her parents, which could take a while because you have no relation to them. Rachel, are they certified foster parents?" Jensen turned his attention to Rachel who shook her head. "Then we have to get them certified and they can take you in. While I speed up the process, or until I can find your other relatives, you'll stay under CPS care. Typically it takes 9 months…"

"I am not leaving Lima for 9 months." Quinn grabbed onto Rachel, hugging the brunette like a doll. "I've been her barely 6 months, I'm not leaving. I'm not leaving Rachel… This is why I didn't want to come to you people."

"I can speed up the process. You don't seem to have many relatives, we've checked. Give me a few weeks, and you can go back to living with the Berry's." Jensen watched as she nodded softly, refusing to let go of Rachel the entire time. "In the meantime, I'm just keeping you here until we can find a room for you to stay in."

"So where is she staying until then?" Rachel put a hand on Quinn's clasped ones, fully aware of how much the blonde needed her now.

"Dr. Allen wants to monitor the bleed on your brain. It hasn't swelled violently, but you're lucky she caught it when she did. Until it stops, you'll be staying here. Dr. Allen also informed me of the many bruises and cuts, scars, so she wants to keep an eye on those for now." Jensen felt the pager beep, and excused himself to go outside, talking on his cell.

Rachel turned around, exhausted from the constant crying. Quinn hadn't told her about the extent of the abuse, and while the blonde was in the scanner, she had been crying into her Dad's shoulder, unsure of how to handle the situation at hand. "Why didn't you tell me everything?"

"Because I felt ashamed about it. There's you, beautiful and happy and normal. Then there's me… sick, twisted… a freak…" Quinn took Rachel's face in her hands, kissing her girlfriend softly. "I didn't want you to worry about a mess."

"You aren't a mess Quinn… and if you become one, I'll still take care of you." Rachel hugged her tightly, hearing Quinn's breathing start to become unstable. "And I'll wait for you to come out of here so we can live together."

"Thank you." Quinn wiped her eyes, both looking up at Dr. Allen and Detective Jensen entering the room. "What's wrong… you look like something's wrong."

"We've arrested your father's friend, Barry Jones, do you recognize the name?" Quinn shook her head at the Detective's question.

"He's the one who owns the apartment, isn't he?" Quinn exhaled, seeing the Detective nod.

The Detective nodded. "We spoke to his wife, as well, and neither of them are talking. I honestly think the wife is clueless though. Barry just won't say a word." Jensen balled his fists. Russell had a friend who would cover both their tracks, one with money. "We're keeping him detaining because he had contact with your father just this morning while he was here paying a parking ticket."

"Your room is set up as well." Dr. Allen spoke up, the quiet woman unusually loud. "It's a private room, the Berry's are paying for it so you might want to thank your girlfriend."

Quinn turned in shock to Rachel, unsure of how to respond. "Rach, that's too much. Honestly, I don't deserve the special treatment... Hell, you should just put me on the metal ward." Rachel hugged her softly, and she smiled, "Thanks Rach…"

"You are staying on that level though. Nothing is physically wrong with you, except the brain bleed, and it would be best if you spoke to a therapist for now" Dr. Allen looked at the room, and Quinn nodded, standing and stretching, taking Rachel by the hand and pulling her up. "Would you like to go there now, I know the Berry men are just setting up a few things."

"Sure," Quinn nodded; looking at her and Rachel's intertwined fingers. "Let's go."


	16. The Sinner

**Hello all. I know this is extremely late in publishing and I apologize. I've been a mess for the past few months. Just an honest to God mess, my head has been everywhere, I've been dealing with my depression, through self harm, insomnia and anxiety, but I've begun medication, so I think I'm stable now. I've also learned that my mother may have cancer, so I've been dealing with that as well. I'm still sorry, I should have a tighter hold on my stories, especially because I wish to become a writer one day. I have to have a tighter grip on my hormone levels, but again, the medication should help with that. **

**However, here it is, the beginning of the end, or the end of the beginning. A lot is going to be going on. I wasn't sure if hospitals allow patients to leave temporarily, I know it's possible for outpatients, but I wasn't sure about inpatients, so I just had Rachel sneak Quinn out. Spoiler? Not really, it's not a major plot point that they leave. **

**There are dark themes, but there is a lot of self analysis, which I as well have been doing a lot of. It found it's way into my writing. I checked and double checked everything, so hopefully it's alright. Questions, comments and concerns will be addressed when I post next. To those who speak of a love/hate relationship with this story, thank you for keeping with it :) I appreciate all of my followers and reviewers and thank you very much for staying with this story. **

**Also, within the next few chapters, I'll be determining Russell's fate, so I just want to know now your thoughts. Should he die, or should he be placed in prison? I have an idea, I just don't know if I should alter it. The plotline for this is also completed, so the story will be completed. I don't have a timeframe for it however.**

**The flashback doesn't require a warning, if anything it's bittersweet. Also, the title song for this chapter is by Memphis May Fire, in case any of you wonder what songs I use. **

**So without further ado, thank you greatly for sticking with me, and for the support for this story. Honestly, I never expected it to garner this many followers, but it has and I'm grateful. I hope you all have a wonderful week, and I now bid a farewell until I update again.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Quinn bit her lip harshly, tasting the blood on her tongue happily. Tears were streaming down her face, flashes of everything flickering in her head like a dusty film reel. She tugged against something pulling at her hands, a soft fabric digging into her skin so harshly that she wished she could draw blood from it. Her breathing was unstable, flailing like she was caught at sea.

"H-help…" She whispered, hoping someone would catch her; all she could see was him, his face leaning over hers, the horrible weight of his body on hers. She felt the tightened grip on her wrists, and suddenly her back arched; the only sound escaping her mouth was a whimper. Suddenly, there was nothing.

Her head hit the pillow like a brick, the lights in the hospital ceiling becoming fuzzy and watery. Shapes appeared and disappeared like shadows, her vision bleary as she struggled to keep her eyes open. The voices around her were muffled, but she could hear the harsh tones coming from inside her skull. _Weak… wwweak… _like snakes, hissing opinions into her conscience.

Feebly, she tried to plug her ears, but forces were pulling her back. This must be what the drugs were doing to her, but if it was drugs, why were some voices so clearly talking to her. Quinn gasped, feeling the sharp pains in her chest followed by a jolting sensation across her body. The bed disappeared from under her, but she felt the hands grabbing her wrists. The watery shapes become clearer, people she hadn't seen before, but they weren't doctors.

These people were in black, unmoving, just staring down at her as she looked up at them, her eyes squinting. Faces became razor sharp before disappearing into the watery light.

"Quinn!" That one voice shocked her vision back into place, and she looked around, her freed hands by her side. Blinking harshly at the light, she instantly sat up, her legs caught in the mess of blankets, the IV in her hand pulsating from the pain. Looking around the white hospital room, she saw Rachel looking at her with worry and she turned, seeing the dangling cuffs on the bed.

"What happened?" She whispered her voice scratchy from lack of water in the past few hours. "There were these people, looking at me, wearing all black." She laughed weakly, feeling the bed sink in a bit as Rachel sat beside her; pale, cold hands being placed in Rachel's warm ones. "I don't even know who they were, they just looked so incredibly sad. For me… What sense does that make?"

"I don't know…" Rachel knew better than to say anything else. Quinn's little world including analyzing her dreams so much, she didn't know how to respond. "'I'm sorry…"

"It's alright," Quinn closed her eyes, feeling the bed rocking like a boat beneath her. She clung to Rachel tightly, relieved by her doll under in her arms. "I don't want to be here Rach…" The bed was rocking horribly underneath them, or maybe it was her, shaking like a leaf. Quinn cracked her knuckles, and kissed Rachel softly on the cheek, inhaling harshly. "Take me home Rachel, please."

"I…" Rachel blinked back the burning tears, running a hand softly through Quinn's hair. "I can't Quinn… you know that."

"Please Rach, I'm begging you. I don't want to stay here." Quinn snaked her hands around Rachel's waist, her face gently pressed against her girlfriend's silky brown hair. "I'll be good Rachel, I promise."

"Quinn… this is why I can't take you home yet." Rachel wiggling around in Quinn's arms, both girls now lying on their side, Rachel facing the blonde currently pressed against her, hiding from the outside world. "You shouldn't have to feel the need to say that Quinn. I would never doubt you to be anything less, but right now… you need to start getting better."

Rachel held onto Quinn tightly as the other girl tried to move away, brushing away the strands of blonde hair from her face. "Quinn, look at me. It's going to be long, and tough but you can do this." She grasped Quinn's hands tightly, "I'll be there beside you whenever I can, however I can. I'm not going to leave you alone now. Not now, not ever, okay?" She gently kissed Quinn's forehead, feeling the blonde break down.

"I can't do this Rach…" Quinn squeezed her hands tightly, her head buried in her shoulder. "I can't go up in front of him, when they find him. I-I can't just face him after everything… He'll kill me." She let go of Rachel's hand, covering her burning eyes. "He'll… he'll find a way. I-I ca… I can't."

Rachel grabbed her tightly, inhaling the faint vanilla smell of her girlfriend, feeling her shoulder and arm become wet with Quinn's tears. "It's okay…" She whispered, feeling Quinn's back tense with every small rub. "You can survive this. You've been fighting your entire life for this, you can fight just a little more, and you can win. Then we can go home." The somber glow of the hospital lights suddenly became bright on her eyes and she squinted, knowing how horribly Quinn's must be burning. "The police also can't do much until they know your father's whereabouts as well…"

"I know… I just want to go home now." Quinn murmured, her voice higher, like a small child's. Rachel nodded against Quinn's head, using every bit of her strength not to break down as well. Quinn needed her for support right now; she needed to be the strong one, the knight in armour, and that armour was a great lawyer. "Please take me home Rachel."

"I can't…" Her voice cracked, blinking rapidly. "I can't take you home now. You have to stay here; these doctors know what to do."

"Can you stay with me until I fall asleep again?" Quinn whispered, the lights completely hidden between the pillow and Rachel's neck. She grabbed Rachel's shirt by the neckline, afraid to let go. Rachel would definitely be there as early as possible tomorrow morning, but the thought of being alone in an empty bed, in such a big room scared her. She was shaking, both girls could feel it; she couldn't be kept alone. What if he came?

"Of course." Rachel ran fingers delicately though her hair. "I love you Quinn."

"I love you too," Quinn felt herself trail into an uneasy sleep. She felt her heart race no matter how black it was, and in her dreams she could hear something clawing against fabric, barging its way into her head. At some point, her hands uncurled around Rachel's collar, and Hiram came in, lifting up the smaller brunette and taking her back home

Through the night, she tossed and turned in an empty bed. A nurse would come in every so often to see if the moaning coming from the room was because of pain. Slowly, a pale light was beginning to come across the horizon, through the blinds, and she stirred, lying horizontally across the bed. Slowly she sat up, her hair hanging in her eyes, and she looked at her hands lying bare in her lap, the hospital bracelet around her bony wrist.

The small red lines around her arms were intimidating, and she didn't answer when a nurse called to her. She stared down at her skin, unsure of how to continue with everything. She longed for Rachel beside her, but she knew that wasn't going to happen anytime soon. Cream wouldn't help such old scars, nothing would at this point.

She started scratching at the pale lines, unsure why. She clawed at herself hard, trying to block out how they had landed on her skin. She looked at her fingertips, dotted red with the blood drawn and back at the bed sheets, pulling them over her head and lying back down. Her arm stung sharply, and she curled around it, clawing at a pillow and arching her body around the harder fabric as she cried softly. It was safe here, for now. There were monitors in the hallway and the blanket was over her head like a hood. She was safe.

Tears stained the pillow and her stinging arm seemed to shoot pain right into her head. She ground her teeth together, locking her jaw and trying to understand why her head was throbbing. The doctors had taken enough scans, and she wasn't bleeding anywhere in her weak skull, but it felt like a hammer was being pounded against her temples with every inhale.

"Quinn?" Her eyes widened at the unknown voice, and she hugged the pillow tighter, burying her face into the wet fabric. "Where are you dear, you need the medication."

She shook her head under the blanket. Their idea of medication was anti-depressants and anti-anxieties, but she thought they were both pointless. Her manic depression and anxieties hadn't driven her to suicide yet, and they probably never would at this point. She had survived this much that she wouldn't try to kill herself; he would do it for her. She felt the sheet being pulled off her head, and she tugged it back harshly, still afraid of looking out of the sheets.

"Please, just hand me the pills and I'll take them." Quinn knew exactly what the penicillin looked like; she had needed it a few times before. The other meds weren't worth it.

"I need to see that you take this Quinn, and you need them to fight the infection, come out from under there." She felt the hands wrap around her waist and she screamed, flipping over underneath the sheets and throwing her fist out as hard as she could. The nurse grunted in protest, but let go and she curled into a smaller mass under the sheets, her knees pressed up to her chin.

She heard the footsteps exit the room again, and closed her eyes tightly; waiting to her the nurse come back again, perhaps with backup, but she didn't hear anything. She barely felt the drugs shooting through her I.V. until she couldn't see anything clearly anymore.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"Please hurry Daddy," Rachel was ready to crawl out of her skin from nerves as her father drove her back to the hospital. Although he was staying within the speed limit and going fairly fast as it was, she was growing more impatient with each passing road sign.

"I'm going at the speed limit Rachel, please calm down." Leroy steered the car onto the stretch of highway leading to the hospital, glancing in the rear view mirror to catch Rachel biting her nails. "I thought you kicked that habit in grade school?"

"I'm nervous Daddy… I'll stop after all of this is finally over." Rachel drummed her fingers against the mirror, tapping her foot nervously as well. "Quinn was scared out of her mind last night, and I just left her there. She's probably awake and afraid, and I'm just worried. I hope she's ok…" Rachel pressed her head against the glass, closing her eyes and yawning. She had been up since 6:30, and the four hours it took for her Daddy to drive her were grueling.

"I'm sure she'll be fine Rachel. It's a hospital, I'm sure they know what to do." Leroy pulled off of the highway, stopping at the red light and hearing Rachel fuming in the backseat. "Just because you're cursing the traffic light doesn't mean we'll get there any quicker."

"There's barely any traffic headed in that direction, I'm sure that they can wait, I cannot. Daddy, I need to get there." Rachel was tugging so hard against the seat belt that they both heard the loud click and it auto-locked. "Dammit!"

"Now will you settle down?" Leroy sighed as Rachel shook her head, now her entire leg twitching with nerves. He was just as worried about the blonde teen, but he knew that he couldn't let the emotions get the best of him. Hiram was already dealing with the lawyers and police in this situation, and he couldn't afford to flip his lid either.

The 5 blocks it took to get to the hospital were all red lights, and Rachel was just shaking quietly in the back, ready to claw the headrest off the seat in front of her. She dug her non-existent nails into the leather seat, trying to calm herself down. Of course Quinn would be safe in the hospital. Doctors probably had to deal with this sort of thing often, a thought that made her sick. She bunched her skirt in her clammy hands, finally pulling into the hospital's underground parking. They drove past the door to the elevators, and as much as she pleaded, Leroy wouldn't let her out of the car until they found a parking space.

As soon as one was located, in the back of the garage, Rachel tugged off the seatbelt, and flung open the car door, accidently bumping it against the cement pole beside her.

"What was that?" Leroy emerged from the driver's side by the time Rachel had slammed it shut.

"Probably the pipes settling," Rachel ran around the car, grabbing him by the arm and tugging him towards the elevators. She really was getting reckless, but she didn't care. This was almost an animal instinct to protect her girlfriend. It never occurred to her that she would one day feel so passionately about someone, but since Quinn entered the picture, she had gotten accustomed to the impossible. "Come on Daddy, let's go. I waited patiently in the car, let's hurry now."

"You consider that patient?" Leroy questioned, but upped his speed, rushing beside Rachel to the elevators. The wait for the slow metal box was agonizing, Rachel tapping her foot with impatience until it arrived.

"So when we get to the floor, you can sign us in, and I'll go see her, right?" Rachel paced around the narrow space, feeling too numb to cry.

"If you're allowed, then yes, we'll do that." Leroy shoved his hands in his pockets, watching Rachel groan as the elevator dinged for more people to get on. "Come here and settle down. If Quinn sees you so antsy, she'll get worried."

"I don't want to her worry about me now." Rachel nodded in agreement, standing by her dad, and smiling softly as he put an arm around her. More people came into the elevator, another family visiting relatives and Rachel looked at the floor, trying to avoid their noise.

Eventually they landed on Quinn's floor, and Rachel smiled, seeing the loud family stay on the elevator as they exited. "Come on Daddy, sign us in." Rachel left his side as she ran down the hall, looking at the array of closed doors. She could hear her father talking still to the nurses, still too early perhaps to be awake in the hospital. It was silent in the wing, and she could see the sunlight coming through the bottom of the doors.

She slowly opened the door to Quinn's room, the relaxed feeling inside her lasting for about a second until she saw how the blonde was lying on the bed, her hands tied up on the posts in fabric cuffs. She froze in the doorway, unsure of what to do.

"Oh god no." Rachel shut the door quietly, and ran to her father still talking to the orderly. She tugged at his arm, trying to get his attention, and she was well aware that she was acting less than half her age. "Daddy, can you please question why Quinn is tied to the bed like an unruly patient?"

"What are you talking about?" Leroy looked down at Rachel, seeing the fear and tears in her eyes, and he knew she was serious. He turned to the nurse at the counter. "Can you please explain that to me?"

"Quinn Fabray wasn't taking her medication and when the nurse tried to give it to her to first time, she was shoved by Ms. Fabray, so the patient had to be detained." The nurse spoke clearly, looking down at the sheets of papers in front of him, and Leroy grabbed Rachel by the waist as she lost it.

"What the hell are you talking about? I didn't know we are in a prison when these people have to be put in fucking handcuffs! This is a mental health ward, you idiot, why would you go to that extent as to chain people who have suffered so much under control like yours in their life. I demand you get rid of those handcuffs on the bed, or I will rip them off myself and tie them around your skinny neck." Rachel hissed, pulling herself over the counter, inches away from his face despite the fact that her father was trying to pull her back.

"And what authority do you have in here?" He looked at her, his face smug, and she nearly swung out her own fist in rage.

"I am her girlfriend, I know what happened to her, and I fucking know that she wouldn't throw the first punch. If she punched a nurse, then that bitch probably deserved it. Do you know why she's in this ward, and not in some other place in this hospital?" Rachel felt the flicks of saliva flying out of her mouth, and waited for him to say something. She was watching this nurse break under her stare.

"I assume you'll tell me?" He spat back, and Rachel lunged forward again, her knees nearly crashing against the counter.

"You imbecile, you have absolutely no people skills and I don't know why you're working in the service industry. She was raped" Rachel spat out with fire in her eyes, seeing the orderly physically shy away from her. "She was raped over and over again, for so many years, and you have to gall to sit here and tell me that she deserves to be tied up because she didn't want to take a pill? Go shove a cactus up your ass, you insensitive prick."

Rachel jumped off the desk, visibly shaking with anger and felt her Daddy's hands let go of her waist. She set off down the hall again, tears streaming silently down her face. She once again quietly opened the door to Quinn's room, and shut it, walking to her girlfriend and looking at the bags of medicine streaming into her limp body by the I.V.

Without saying a word, Rachel unbuckled the cuffs from around Quinn's wrists, afraid to take out the I.V. lines. She could see the one labeled saline, and the other one Penicillin, but Haldol was a word she didn't recognize. That bag was empty, but she wasn't going to risk pulling out any cords. Slowly, Rachel moved Quinn's slumped body in a flat position on the bed, and she curled up against her, taking comfort in her girlfriend's rising and falling chest.

"Rachhh?" Quinn slurred, and she leaned onto her elbows, looking at Quinn's cloudy eyes.

"I'm here… I'm here Quinn," Rachel whispered, grinning at Quinn's smile.

"Am I dead yet?" Quinn giggled, and Rachel looked at her concerned.

"No Quinn, you're not dead, and you won't be for a long time." Rachel brushed against the blonde bangs, trying to analyze the fog in Quinn's eyes.

"Why notttt?" The grey eyes closed, and Rachel cupped Quinn's cheek.

"Because I'm not going to let you die." Rachel kissed her softly, letting Quinn go to see the blonde looking back at her scared. The rapt attention in the hazel eyes scared her.

"They drugged me Rach." Quinn slowly reached for her hand, Rachel grasping it tightly. "I… I feel so weird. They stuck me with something, and I was just out." Quinn clung to her, wincing in pain as the I.V. dug in harshly. "I missed you."

"I missed you too," Rachel whispered, kissing Quinn's forehead gently, one arm around the blonde's shoulder.

"Why do I have to stay here every night?" Quinn clearly didn't care about the pain from the needle because Rachel felt the grip around her waist tighten. "Can I please just come home with you, and come back here for whatever needs fixing?"

"You can't yet Quinn, they just want you here to monitor your head," Rachel gently ran fingers through Quinn's hair, holding the taller girl close. "And my dads still have to get custody before you can come with us legally."

"I was living by myself since I was 15, I can come with you now." Quinn moaned, burying her face in Rachel's shirt, sniffling softly. "Please?"

"I could take you to the underground cafeteria, but I'd still have to leave you here at night." Rachel whispered solemnly, hearing the defeated sigh coming from her girlfriend. She wiped the tears from her own eyes, trying to stay calm in the circumstances. "I'm not doing this to hurt you at all Quinn, understand?"

"Yeah… I get it." Quinn nodded, turning onto her back, stretching out her thin frame. Rachel noticed how she wasn't in the hospital gown, but actual pajamas, her arm trapped under Quinn's head. "I wish everything was different, but then I don't."

"What do you mean?" Rachel looked at her, and Quinn shrugged, closing her eyes and arching her back in another stretch.

"I don't think I'd be here if things were different. I wouldn't have met you, that's for sure." Quinn exhaled loudly. "I don't even know where I'd be. Do you ever stop and just think about that? If your parents were totally different people or if something happened in your life that changed the course of everything? What would happen to everyone? Having such a paranoid mind makes you think."

"I don't know, I've never thought about that too much." Rachel narrowed her eyes, analyzing about the possibilities. "I think if I was popular, I'd be a bitch. And if I hadn't met you, I'd probably be reliant on boys for the rest of my life."

"I don't think you'd turn out like that." Quinn turned her head, looking at Rachel still in thought. "You'd still be the most caring person, no doubt about that."

"What about you?" Rachel's voice was soft, clearly still comprehending the possibility that everything could've been different to the full extent.

"I think I'd be a huge bitch if none of this happened." Quinn smiled as Rachel laughed. "Honestly, my parents had money and I was a gymnastics kid. I'd probably have been a shitty cheerleader and a fucking bitch. I think I'd absolutely hate myself if I was that."

"Well, now you say that." Rachel laughed. "But if you were raised differently, then it wouldn't matter. You wouldn't care if you were a bitch or not because it would be a different mentality, right? If it was a different reality, we'd also have different mentalities, don't you think?"

"Definitely," Quinn nodded in assurance, both looking dark lights on the ceilings. "It's weird to think about, gives you a real existentialist look on life."

"Using big words in the morning?" Rachel laughed, and Quinn nodded proudly.

"Yeah, I guess. In grade 9, we learned about Romeo and Juliet and the existentialist qualities and I think that was the only thing I learned in that class." Quinn tried to think about that time, but she didn't want to go back to the first advent of self-reliance.

"What's your timeline?" Rachel looked at her, and Quinn cocked her head.

"What do you mean by that?" She scratched behind her ear with her free hand, her left spread across Rachel's abdomen and she didn't want to move it.

"You were born in Maine, and then you went where?" Rachel tried to think about everything Quinn had told her, but her memory was fuzzy.

"I was in Maine until I was three, and then I flew out to an Ohio airport, because I remember my mother complaining how that airport was the gate to hell. I'm also pretty sure I met you there." Quinn smiled at the nudge on her shoulder, Rachel looking at her confused. "I remember meeting this girl my age saying she wanted to go to Broadway, and she was going there that night."

"Holy cow." Rachel's jaw dropped. "I went to see Wicked when I was 3, my dads have pictures… We knew each other then, and I wanted you to come with me!" Rachel nearly jumped up in remembrance. "I remember that now! You had pink, that's all I know, but we talked about everything at that Dunkin Donuts."

"Oh god, yeah. I don't know how I can recall this." Quinn nodded, thinking about that one chance encounter. "Too bad you couldn't take me then."

"Sorry about that Princess." Rachel kissed Quinn softly, seeing the tears brim in her eyes from the name.

"It's ok; we ended up together, so that's good." Quinn inhaled sharply, wiping the tears. "Anyways, from there I went to North Dakota for a bit, until I was about 5, and then I lived in Michigan for the longest time. After that, there was Iowa, where I met that Sam dude, then Kentucky, and finally Ohio. That's how much I shifted around."

"You didn't even have a house to call home." Rachel murmured and she nodded softly.

"Nothing was permanent, except for the demons I lived with. Every damn day, I saw those assholes." Quinn's stomach rumbled loudly, both glancing down at it before looking at each other. "Can you sneak me out to get real food, instead of this hospital crap? We can even go to a vegan restaurant."

"No, we'll go get something to eat" Rachel felt her right arm be stuck with pins and needles as Quinn sat up, pulling the I.V. out of her hand. "Just get dressed and we can go, and we'll bring some Advil in case you need it."

"Ok," Quinn snuggled up to Rachel as the brunette sat up, hugging her arm tightly. "I love you."

"I love you too," Rachel entwined their fingers, kissing Quinn, biting at the blonde's lower lip as she tried to pull away. She felt Quinn's hands on her chest and squeaked, seeing Quinn blush as they both looked at each other. "What was that?"

"Well, you weren't letting me go so I figured I might have some fun." Quinn laughed as Rachel shoved her playfully.

"I don't want my first time to be in a hospital bed either." Rachel grinned, grabbing Quinn by the collar of her pajama shirt and pulling her in for another kiss.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

_Quinn sits patiently in the seat at Dunkin Donuts, waiting for her parents to come back from wherever they had gone to. She hugs the Cinderella doll tightly, smiling as she brushes its hair. _

"_Hello Cinderella." She whispers, looking at the doll's blue eyes. She frowns, wishing the brown pencil crayon had survived the washing machine. Cinderella was supposed to have hazel eyes, like her. Not these weird blue ones. "How are you today?"_

"_Why are you talking to a doll?" A voice bothers her, and Quinn turns around in her seat quickly to see a girl talking to her. It's a really short girl, with a green skirt. _

"_Because she listens to me, and we can talk without me being yelled at." Quinn gets off the chair, looking down at the pink tutu that Mother had put her in. She had chosen her own black boots though, Grandma gave them to her. "Don't you talk to your dolls?"_

"_I don't have dolls, I have stuffies." The girl shows her a large stuff brown bear with a word on it. "I talk to them instead because I don't have a lot of friends."_

"_Sorry," Quinn says suddenly, and they both look away weirdly. "I'll be your friend."_

"_Really?" The girl looks really excited and Quinn nods. She's really short. _

"_Of course, it would be cool being friends with a midget." Quinn sees the sad look on the other girl's face. "You could go through the air ducts and unlock doors and stuff."_

"_What do you mean?" The girl sits down and Quinn follows._

"_You've never seen those movies where the small one has to be sent through an air vent, and then they save the day because they do a sneak attack on the bad guy?" Quinn makes up the story as she goes, happy to see a smile come onto the smaller girl's face. The other one shakes her head and she pretends to pop out her eyes. "You should see those movies, they're really cool."_

"_Wow. Maybe you could come over and we could watch one." The other girl clings to her bear tightly, smiling. "I'm Rachie, and I love Barbra Streisand. Have you heard of her?" _

"_No, who is she?" Quinn pulls her knees up to her chest, Cinderella in her arms. She plays around with the fake crown in her hand._

"_She's a singer and an actress, she's even won awards! Do you like plays?" Rachie is getting really excited and Quinn smiles. She seemed kinda sad before, and now she's happy. _

"_I haven't seen any," Quinn scratches her head. "I don't know if I like them or not."_

"_Well, I'm going to see one on Broadway; it's the biggest theatre in the world! It's so famous; people on it win awards too! Want to come?" Rachie doesn't wait for an answer before she drops her bear and crawls out from under the table. "I'm going to ask my dads if you can come with us." _

"_Ok," Quinn whispers, stroking Cinderella's hair. This Broadway place sounds like fun. Grandma told her once that plays are singing and dancing and acting, and she wants to go there. Rachie would probably be so happy when she gets there. _

"_They said they had to ask your parents about it." Rachie sits back down under the table, "And they wanted to be able to see me, so they're just going to sit a bit closer."_

"_You're parents want to see you all the time?" Quinn's shocked._

"_Yeah, they get worried about me a lot because I don't have many friends." Rachie nods, looking at Quinn. "Where are yours?"_

"_I don't know. My Mother said she'd be back before our flight left, but I don't know where they are any more." Quinn shrugs, "They don't really care that much, my Father just wants me home before night."_

"_That's weird." Rachie sits quietly. "Does he ever take you to the movies?"_

_Quinn laughs loudly, nearly falling over her doll. "No, he doesn't care that much. Grandpa always took me there."_

"_Oh. I don't have grandparents." Rachie whispers, and Quinn notices how much the smaller girl is watching her. _

"_Why not?" Quinn puts the tiny crown on her own head, trying to make the other girl laugh. She does, and Quinn likes the sound._

"_I don't know, my dads never told me." Rachie blushes. "You'll still be my friend right? A lot of other kids don't play with me because their parents tell them not too."_

"_Well then they're wrong and stupid. Of course I'll still be your friend." Quinn leans over and hugs Rachie tightly, the other girl hugging her back. "Your parents shouldn't be in charge of your friends. People are so stupid aren't they?"_

"_Don't say that, stupid is a bad word." Rachie giggled as she said it herself. "Stuuuupid. People are stupid."_

"_Shoot, I've made you bad. I'm sorry," Quinn giggles, and they both laugh. She looks out at the people in the airport, and sees her mother walking towards her, looking like she had been crying. "Oh, my mother's coming back." _

"_Ooh, let's ask her if you can come with me to Broadway." Rachie grabs her hand and they get out from under the table. Quinn smiles a little when she realizes that they're still holding hands after they stand up. "Where is she?"_

"_Over there," Quinn points out her Mother, and she doesn't look angry, which is good. "But she'll probably say no anyways."_

"_We can ask, right?" Rachie looks at her, but Quinn shakes her head._

"_Then she might get mad at me," Quinn whispers, holding the crown out to Rachel. "Take this though, put it on one of your stuffies."_

"_Are you sure, it's from your princess doll." Rachie takes it, putting it on the bears head._

"_Of course. My Cinderella isn't a princess that needs a crown, she just needs good friends." Quinn smiles, Rachie nodding, putting the crown around her wrist like a bracelet. "Bye Rachie, have fun on Broadway."_

"_Thanks, have a good time, wherever you're going." Rachie hugs her again, and she smiles, hugging back. She waves goodbye and runs to her Mother, taking her hand and walking away from the Dunkin Donuts. _

_She doesn't look back either, she doesn't want to think about a friend she could've had. She's also kinda tired, and the donut Mother bought her was now hurting her stomach. "Where are we going Mother?"_

"_Well, I came back to find you, your Father's asleep on the plane." Her stomach hurts even more when Mother says that. She's picked up by Mother, and they begin running, Quinn buries her face in Mother's shoulder, her stomach still hurting a lot. _

"_My stomach hurts." Quinn moans quietly. _

"_It's the sugar Quinn, just close your eyes and go to sleep. I'm not going to tell your Father that you were talking to that girl." Mother whispers to her, and she nods, Mother now brushing out her hair with her fingers. _

"_Why does Father get mad when I make friends?" Quinn yawns, hugging Cinderella in one arm and the other around Mother's neck. _

"_I can't answer that right now Quinn ok, just don't tell him about it and we can call your grandparents when we get to the new house, alright?" Mother hoists her up higher and she nods._

"_Yay… I haven't talked to Grandpa in a long time. I miss him and Grandma. Why did we have to leave?" Quinn wants to cry, but she's too tired. She yawns again and hugs Mother tighter. _

"_I can't tell you that now Quinn, you'll understand when you're older." She nods, turning her head on Mother's shoulder, towards Cinderella, and falling asleep._

_-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-_

"I never realized how much I missed subs until now," Quinn smiled, licking the barbecue sauce off her fingers as she watched Rachel eating her veggie sub. "Anyways, thanks for getting me out of the hospital."

"My pleasure." Rachel smiled, pulling a tomato slice out of the sandwich and eating it whole. Quinn looked like a patient though; she was dressed in sweats, with a huge winter jacket over her shoulders and the Batman converse still on. They had snuck out of the hospital through the basement parking, and she knew her dads were at the police station right now. Sneaking in might be difficult.

It was freezing outside, but neither really noticed. Quinn looked so different without the leather jacket, but her black beanie was still familiar. "We should go shopping before you have to be back there."

"I can miss a few therapy sessions," Quinn shrugged it off, but looked down at her sandwich as Rachel gave her the look.

"No you can't. If you can please these doctors enough, then you can come home quicker and just go back for visits." Rachel looked at Quinn tired face, noticing the faint markings from the snake bites she used to have. She realized now that it was probably a form of rebellion in her surroundings, and she realized how Quinn wanted to forget that time. "Where do you want to go?"

"I don't know, wherever you want to go. I'm just glad to be out of that damn building." Quinn licks her fingers, cleaning off the sub sauce and stretching out against the chair, arching her back. She looked so thin in the large coat. "Can we go buy cd's or something? And maybe a popsicle?"

"We can do whatever you want today. You don't have to be back at the hospital until 6, so we still have all day." Rachel finished off her sandwich as well, balling the wrapper in her hands and sitting with her legs crossed in the chair. Quinn didn't really move, looking out the window onto the empty streets.

"Why aren't you in school?" Quinn asked, drumming her nails on the table.

"Tomorrow's winter vacation, everyone skips on the day before it," Rachel shrugged, and Quinn looked up at her.

"How long was I in there for?" She motions to the large ominous building across the street, and Rachel shook her head again.

"I don't know, the days seem the fuse together. I think I have it marked on my calendar, if you really want to know." Rachel whispered, taking Quinn's hand to stop the twitching. The blonde nodded, staring out the window again at the passing cars.

"Isn't that the Peirce's car," Quinn stood up from the table, and walked over to the window, pulling Rachel along with her to look at the blue fiat outside. She put her hand on the cold glass of the sub shop's window, seeing the small car, waiting to see if it really was Brittany in the front seat of the vehicle. She looked at Rachel, worry staining her face.

"I…I think so, but why would she be down here. I told her I'd take her to visit you later." Rachel whispered, "We should go see if it is her."

"Yeah," Quinn pulled the large jacket around her thin frame, pushing open the doors to the sub shop, and shivered at the sudden gust of air. Rachel gripped her hand tightly, and for that she was grateful. The stoplight was taking forever, and the car eventually pulled into the parking garage, Quinn tugged Rachel after her as they both chased it. "Where did it go?"

"You better not get us lost down here Quinn," Rachel blinked innocently at the taller blonde who just looked at her.

"Relax," Quinn pulled Rachel closer to her, putting an arm around the smaller blonde as she shivered. It was freezing in the garage, and packed with cars. "Where did that thing go?"

"After all the shit that's happened, you really want to go further into a parking garage?" Rachel tugged Quinn towards the exit, the blonde standing firm where she was on the side of the pavement. "If it's Brittany, I'm sure we'll find her here anyways."

"But what if we don't?" Quinn cracked her knuckles, feeling an insane amount of pressure behind her temples. She rubbed them gently, finally relenting to Rachel's tugging. "It's just easier if I worry about someone else, so I don't have to think about myself." She whispered, letting Rachel guide her back to the elevator. The sudden rush of hot air hit them in the face, and she nearly gasped.

"Don't think like that Quinn," Rachel sighed, "You can't go through life giving your heart to people and expect to make it out without being scarred." She felt Quinn go rigid under the layers of clothing and she berated herself for the choice of words. "I'm sorry; I didn't mean it like that."

"I understand." The blonde nodded. "But don't you ever get that feeling where if you spend so much time invested in something else, you forgot who you are? You just grow accustomed to who you've become through the attachment. I never had friends before this, friends who meant something to me, who stuck by me. It's like I don't remember who I am, or who I was before this all started, before I moved here." She out her hand on the glass against the elevator doors, which apparently was going as far up as possible. "Who are any of us really?"

"I don't know," Rachel looked at her, waiting for Quinn to continue.

"What if I was supposed to be a different person, and I've just been broken down so many times that it's just easier for me to acquire personalities by symbiosis? What if he just broke me so much that I don't know who I am anymore?" Quinn wiped moisture from the glass as the temperature rose. "I could've been confident in myself, maybe somewhere inside, I really am. Maybe my real personality is this tough person, confident, happy, willing to create bonds with people, and because I've been surrounded by so much hellfire, I don't remember that person anymore."

They stood in silence, the elevator finally stopping at the top floor. Neither made a motion to exit, Rachel with her arms still looped around Quinn's, the blonde looking aimlessly at the numbered buttons. "Do you ever think about stuff like this Rach?"

"Not really. I try to focus on where I eventually want to be, so I can eventually get there. Somewhere away from all this drama, there's a place where I can go and be happy." Rachel whispered, her voice booming in the confined box. "I try not to think about the child I was because of all the bullying. I was just used to coming home and doing things by myself. If it's true what you're saying about personalities, mine is probably solid. No one influenced me as a child, friend wise. I had none."

The door dinged, and both girls glanced up, seeing a rather tall woman in an expensive coat looking at them. They rushed through the doors quickly, sitting on the bench across from the elevator.

"What did you do as a kid?" Quinn grasped Rachel's hand tightly; waiting for a response that she wasn't sure would come.

"I danced… I sang… I watched more Barbra Streisand movies than the average adult." Rachel leaned into Quinn, the feel of the puffy jacket mixing with the iced vanilla scent. "I didn't have friends to influence me a lot, unless your theory says that matters as well."

"I don't know if it's a theory. It's just something I think about a lot." Quinn looked at her ragged nails, ground down from the nerves recently. "Sorry about this. I get really existentialistic sometimes. I really don't know why…"

"Don't apologize for that Quinn." Rachel felt Quinn's arm around her shoulders. "It's perfectly normal to analyze things like this." They sat in silence, Rachel practically hearing Quinn's thoughts. _Is it really normal to think like this_, the words nearly screamed to her, but she didn't really say anything. She just held a tight grip across Quinn's waist. "What time do you have to be back by?"

"We still have 3 hours to kill before therapy Rach, don't worry." Quinn sighed. "I can keep track of my own meds."

"What are you guys doing here?" The nervous voice made both girls glance up. Brittany was in the hospital, and she was still in her pajamas, her eyes bright red from crying heavily.

"Technically, this is my temporary home." Quinn groaned, shifting a bit and her sides sore.

"I know about that, Rachel told me what happened at school." Brittany sat on the bench beside Quinn, the shorter blonde wedged between them neatly. "But why are you on this floor?"

"We just took the elevator all the way, talking about everything." Rachel stuck out her head, looking at Brittany. "What are you doing here?"

"My dad had a heart attack," Brittany whispered soberly, her eyes unfocused. "My mom woke me up and he wasn't breathing and we called the ambulance." Rachel watched Brittany dig her nails into her palms. "I don't remember a time when I was this scared, except, maybe with my brother…"

Quinn pulled Brittany into a tight hug with her free arm, Brittany more stunned than sad now; it was as though she was as numb as the day is long. Quinn sighed, feeling then tension through the thin pajamas, unsure of how to console someone dealing with this. She didn't know how to console herself half the time, much less such a delicate thing like Brittany. "He'll be fine Britt…"

"How do you know that? How does anyone know that? One day we'll all just wake up dead, and no one will know what happened to any of us." Brittany whispered, pushing away from Quinn, sitting hunched over on the bench, touching nothing but the seat. "We're just space wasters, waiting to die."


End file.
